Catherine held out a palm. “I know what you’re thinking. Your father cheated on me later on. It was partly my fault. I wasn’t the best wife, but that’s not the point. The point is that he was a good man and provided for us.”
“Did you love your high school sweetheart?”
Catherine waved a hand dismissively. “You can’t always make decisions based on your heart. Feelings are volatile and change on a whim. You have to be more practical. It’s not up to me, but if you marry the stable guy, then I think you will have made the right choice.”
Katie pressed on. “But did you love the guy?”
Catherine looked thoughtful, as though she were in another place, another time. She looked like she wanted to cry, but she did not. Instead, she cleared her throat and sat up straight.
“Yes,” she finally said, her voice devoid of feeling. “In many ways, I loved him more than your father.”
She got up. “But this guy later descended into drugs. He was emotionally unstable. He now lives in a mental hospital.”
Her mother smoothed out the sheets on the bed. “Most people don’t end up with their first loves. It’s just not done.”
She looked up. “I’ll leave you to your thoughts.”
She headed toward the door and turned back. “But just remember that life isn’t a fairy tale. I read you a lot of Disney classics when you were growing up, and I regret it now. I think it might have made your expectations about love and marriage unrealistic. Just remember that most of us don’t find our princes charming. Very few do, so don’t expect anything.”
With that, Catherine left Katie’s room.
Katie thought about what her mother had said. It was true. Watching all those Disney movies during childhood made her expect a lot of things when it came to men. Watching those Disney movies made her want her very own prince charming to sweep her off her feet.
She laughed wryly. She now understood that it was all crap. Princes charming did not exist in real life. They were merely fictional characters in fantasy stories. They were merely fantasies.
Katie played with Steven’s ring on her finger.
Earlier that morning, she had woken up and found Steven’s ring on her finger. Brandon’s ring had been on the kitchen table. She had put it in her pocket before going upstairs.
She took out Brandon’s ring and read the inscription one more time.
To Katie, my love. Be my princess. I’ll be your prince. Brandon.
She sniffled.
There are no princes and princesses, she thought.
She chucked the ring across the room. It landed beside the bookshelf.
*
That evening, Brandon sat on a stool in Marine Pub. He had not ordered a drink, but he was seriously thinking about it. It could wash his pain away, numb it out and then he would not have to feel it anymore.
From behind the counter, Harry the bartender looked at him suspiciously. “You know, if you wanted to order some drinks, there’s nothing I can do to stop you, as long as you’re not driving.”
Brandon looked at him. “It’s fine. I don’t need alcohol. Just Katie.”
Harry nodded knowingly. “Ah, it’s about a chick, isn’t it?” He scratched his balding head.
Brandon nodded.
Harry polished the beer glass in his hands. “That’s what I thought. What did you do?”
“Something stupid.”
“It’s never too late.” He adjusted his bartender bow tie and looked up at Brandon.
Brandon was intrigued. “What do you mean?”
“I believe in fate and destiny. How strongly do you feel about this girl?”
“I can’t imagine myself with any other girl.”
Harry put down the beer glass he was polishing. It hit the counter with a loud bang.
The bartender on focused on Brandon, staring at him squarely in the eyes. “Now I know you’re serious.”
Brandon suddenly felt self-conscious. He looked around. Everyone was chatting, drinking and having a good time. He felt like he had been singled out.
Harry pumped a fist in the air, as though he were going to war. “If you love her, you will stop at nothing to win her.”
Brandon scratched his head. “But she doesn’t want to be with me.”
“What did you do?”
“She saw me kissing another girl, but I was just trying to break it off with her. I wanted to prove that there were no feelings there.”
Harry picked up a rag and started wiping the counter. “You apologize?”
“Yeah.”
“Do it again. And then if that doesn’t work, you’ll need a symbolic gesture. You need to sacrifice something, something that proves that you really love her.”
Brandon put a hand around his neck. “I do have something. I have a whole farm full of her favorite spice.”
The bartender looked at Brandon quizzically. “Does she know about this already?”
“She once said she doesn’t want to marry a farmer. She wants someone more ambitious.”
“Oh.”
Brandon paused. “She’s engaged to another man. They’re getting married soon.”
Harry stopped wiping the counter. He surveyed Brandon as though he were a drill sergeant and Brandon were a new recruit. “Then you better take action soon. Time is running out.”
Brandon stood up, confidence pumping back into him. He was going to get Katie back one way or another.
A customer shouted from the other side of the bar. “Harry! I need a drink.”
The bartender tapped the counter twice. “Think about it.” He went over to the customer.
Brandon put on his jacket. He had already thought about it. He did not need to think anymore.
It was time for action.
*
Later that night, he returned to his farm and surveyed the dozen oregano plants.
Brandon went his house, changed into shorts and a T-shirt and headed back out.
He grabbed a hoe and some oregano seeds. He was going to start all over and plant some more for Katie, even if it killed him.
He spent that evening digging up the soil to plant the seeds. He dug and dug and dug until his bad back acted up again.
As sweat drenched his face and leaked onto his T-shirt, he dropped the packet of seeds and clutched his back. The acute pain shot up and down like an elevator gone out of control.
He winced, but then picked up the packet of seeds.
I’m doing this for Katie, he thought. She’ll come back to me if I keep my promise to her. I’ll plant the entire farm with oregano plants.
He started planting them again, moving rapidly along the rows. He was hot and aching all over. His face felt like it was on fire.
When he felt like he was going to faint, he took a break. He examined his hands and found oozing blisters on his palms. His fingers were sore and chapped. Dead skin was peeling off.
But still, he continued.
Brandon continued planting, moving like a speeding bullet along the rows until his legs felt rubbery.
When he could not take it anymore, he collapsed onto the dirt and soil. Clumps of soil clung onto his shorts and T-shirt. He tried to breath but could not. His animal mind told him that he might be dying, but then he struggled and managed to inhale.
He breathed in a potent soil scent, and gagged. He went into a coughing fit and felt spasms in his chest and stomach.
When he calmed down, he thought about Katie, and what she meant to him.
Why am I doing all this? He wondered. Why do I love Katie so much? Is it because she is beautiful? Is it because she kept me company when I had no one? Or was it because she was my first love?
He thought about all his mistakes. Accusing Katie of being a slut, hurting her with another girl, not putting effort into contacting her all those years, and then the misunderstanding.
Brandon looked up and saw towering cornstalks in front of him. He felt so small. He was all alone in the big field. It was a familia
r feeling.
In the distance, a car honked on the highway.
Still lying down, Brandon thought of the love he had for Katie. And how she was now getting it from another man.
Unable to hold it back, he buried his face into the soil and wept.
*
At the same time that Brandon was lying on the soil, Steven was standing outside Katie’s bedroom. He thought about whether to go in. They had not spoken at all that day. He thought he would give her some time to think. But his patience was wearing thin.
The door was ajar and he knocked on it. Katie was staring out the window, and she did not turn around.
Steven entered and walked in front of Katie. He looked at her. Her expression was contemplative.
He knelt down and she finally looked at him. There was no feeling in her eyes. It was though her soul had been sucked out of her.
“Katie, my darling.” He put a hand on her bare knee. Her legs shook a little.
Steven cleared his throat. “I think we should speed up the wedding date. I don’t believe in putting off tomorrow what we can do today.”
Katie looked startled. Her eyes were wild. “When?”
“How’s tomorrow?”
“Isn’t that a little short notice?”
Steven tried to look understanding. “We don’t have a big family or lots of friends. I just want a simple ceremony that commits us to each other and affirms our love.”
Katie adjusted her position, trying to get comfortable. “But I’ve always dreamed of a big wedding, with lots of friends and family.”
Steven wanted to say something, but he could not think of anything that would comfort her. So, he simply said, “But we don’t have a big family or a lot of friends.”
Katie realized that Steven was right.
Her mother’s words rang in her mind.
I read you a lot of Disney classics when you were growing up. Just remember that most of us don’t find our prince charmings. Very few do, so don’t expect anything.
Katie sighed. She realized that her fairy tale wedding was not going to happen. This was, as her mother had bluntly put it, just a fantasy.
“OK,” she said, looking at her fiancé.
He smiled hopefully.
He doesn’t seem too bad, she thought.
Steven put rubbed her leg up and down. Katie found it funny that when Brandon did it, she would tingle all over. When Steven did it, she barely felt the touch.
*
Chapter 17
Later that night, Katie was getting ready for bed when the phone rang. She picked it up on the first ring.
An unfamiliar female voice said, “Hello, is Katie Simpson there, please?”
“Speaking,” Katie replied.
“I’m calling from Vancouver General Hospital. Do you know a Brandon Morrissey?”
Katie’s heart nearly stopped. It was so quiet she could not hear her own breathing.
“Yes,” she finally said. “Yes, I do.”
“He suffered from dehydration and before he passed out, he listed you as his contact. Would you like to come see him? He’s resting right now.”
Stunned, Katie hung up the phone. For a minute, she wondered whether it was just a ruse to get her to see him. The curiosity was strong though. She would go see him one last time, just to tell him to stop bothering her.
Katie headed upstairs and saw her future husband asleep on her bed. Just thinking of him as her future husband felt weird to her. The feeling was as though she had a shirt on inside out.
Steven was sprawled on the bed, snoring. She waited to make sure that he was fast asleep. There was more snoring. As she examined him, something felt out of place. It was bizarre to see him sleeping on her bed, as though he were a foreign element. Katie could not shake the odd feeling from her.
Then, something glinted in the moonlight and caught her attention. She saw Brandon’s ring by her bookshelf.
She picked it up, examined it, and put it in her pocket. Steven was still snoring on the bed. Katie took one last look at him, and then slipped out the front door and into the cool night air.
*
She arrived at Vancouver General Hospital just after midnight. The emergency room was so blindingly bright that she had to hold out a hand to shield her eyes.
Katie approached the desk of the triage nurse. The nurse, a fiery redhead, looked up from her computer.
“I’m here to see Brandon Morissey,” Katie said.
The nurse nodded. “Oh yes. He’s been mumbling for you in his sleep.” She stood up, picking up a clipboard. “Please come with me.”
The nurse’s shoes clacked on the linoleum floor. Katie felt a deep sense of foreboding as they headed for Brandon’s room. She felt like she was being led to her own execution.
Katie asked, “So what happened?”
The nurse flipped the pages on her clipboard. “A neighbor found him unconscious by his house. We managed to revive him temporarily, but he fainted a few minutes after his arrival in the ER.”
They arrived in front of Room 3B.
The nurse gestured toward the door. “Here we are. Go right in. He might be sleeping though.”
The nurse turned around and left.
Katie stood in front of the door all by herself.
She was tingling all over, as though she had just been on a roller coaster. For a moment, she considered turning around and running. Brandon would never know if she did.
But then, curiosity gripped her. She wondered why he had passed out. At the same time, she was touched by his words.
She took a deep breath and pushed open the door.
Brandon was lying on the hospital bed, looking terrible. His face was scratched and dirty, his hands were raw and looked like they had been bleeding, and his hair was caked with mud.
Katie approached the bed, mindful of her high-heels clacking on the floor.
She looked at her first love lying on the bed, all injured.
For a moment, she considered forgiving him. She imagined herself with him and she smiled.
“Why are you smiling?” a voice asked.
She was jolted out of her fantasy. Katie looked down and saw Brandon’s mud-caked face. His eyes were alert.
Katie was taken aback, but quickly regained her composure. “No reason.” She pursed her lips.
“You came,” he said, trying to get up. “You still feel something for me.”
He took her hand, and she let him for a while.
Then, she pulled away. “I came, but it doesn’t mean anything and it doesn’t change anything.”
“I’m sorry,” Brandon said. “Can’t we just forget all this and run away together?”
Katie bit her lips, almost drawing blood. She shook her head.
Brandon held up a sore hand. “I don’t have any feelings for Liz.”
Katie shook her head again. “It’s not just about another girl.” She exhaled a long breath. “I’m just so tired of your drama.”
Color flooded into Brandon’s face. “My drama? What about yours?” His eyes were aflame. “You were the one who abandoned me here. We could have been an amazing couple. But you had to leave.”
Katie’s voice sounded automated. “I told you from the get go. I didn’t want to start anything with you at the beginning because I was going to go. But you wanted me anyway.”
Katie looked resigned. “We’ve had this conversation before. I wanted to grow. I couldn’t give up learning and growing for you.”
Brandon propped himself up in bed, and flinched. “Owww.” He tried to sooth his back.
Katie looked concerned.
Brandon stopped rubbing and stared at Katie. “What if I hadn’t shown up that day at the mall? It’s a tough world out there. I knew you were going to need some support.” The fight was gone from his voice. He looked down at the floor as though it were the most interesting thing in the world.
Katie knelt down at the side of his bed. She put her hand on his hand. “I know. I’
m happy you came after me,” she said quietly. “But my mother told me that most people don’t end up with their first loves. And just because you love someone doesn’t mean you end up marrying them.”
Brandon grabbed her hand. “But I thought you and I were special.”
“I thought that too.” Katie gave him a sad grin. “I hope you get better soon.” She bent down and kissed him on the cheek. She pulled back and said, “I’m getting married tomorrow. And then I’m flying back to Toronto.”
Brandon looked shocked.
She stroked Brandon’s cheek. “I hope you find the love of your life. After all, that’s what we’re all looking for.”
She turned around, but Brandon gripped her hand. “I have already,” he said.
Katie stood there with her back to him, holding his chapped hand. She would love nothing more than to leap into his arms and stay with him forever.
But things were different now.
My mother was right, she thought. People didn’t end up with their first loves. And emotions overpower logic. Steven was stable. And he wouldn’t tweak my emotions like that.
Without turning around, she said, “Being with someone shouldn’t be this hard. I’m just sick of all the drama.”
“But that just means that it’s worth it. Nothing worthwhile ever came easily.”
Katie felt a gentle tug on her hand.
She stood there, immobile like a statue.
Then, she yanked her hand out from his hand and marched out the door.
Brandon yelled out, “I got you an oregano farm.”
But, it was too late. All she heard was a garbled voice.
*
The next day was cloudy. Katie stood in front of the Holy Rosary Cathedral in downtown Vancouver. Steven and her mother were at her sides.
Steven pointed at the church. “Beautiful, isn’t it?”
Katie nodded. She looked at the drab gray bricks and arches of the cathedral. It looked like a prison to her.
The three of them went inside.
Steven went to find the priest and Katie and her mother went into a private dressing room.
“Here is your dress.” Her mother handed a beautiful white wedding gown to her.
Katie took it.
Her mother inspected her. “Cheer up, honey. It’s your wedding day. And you’re making the right choice.”
Meet Me at Taylor Park Page 15