by Jenna Jacob
When she was dressed and ready to leave her appointment, Doc Knight returned with a sack of prenatal vitamins.
He took her hand once again with a paternal smile. “Professionally, the less stress the better for the little person growing inside you. Personally, I’ve been alive long enough to know that life has a funny way of working itself out, so don’t try to come up with all the answers today. Relax as much as you can, and if you ever need an ear, or a shoulder, I’m here for you, sweet girl.”
His kindness was a much-needed balm for her fractured soul. Tears of gratitude swelled in her eyes. She sent him a watery smile. “Thank you.”
After making another appointment, as Doc had instructed, Ivy took her vitamins and left the office. The late February sun warmed her skin but didn’t touch the icy unrest assaulting her system. Numbly strolling down the sidewalk to the bakery, Ivy found it ironic that she’d chosen Haven to escape attention and find a sense of anonymity. But she’d lived in the south long enough to know those along the Bible Belt didn’t lend much sympathy to a girl who’d gone and gotten herself in trouble. There was positively no way her out-of-wedlock pregnancy would go unnoticed in a few more weeks.
Once more, I’m dragging the Addison name through the mud. Priceless.
She knew she’d have to break the news to her parents, but not today. Ivy wasn’t ready to shove another knife of disappointment straight into her mom’s or dad’s heart. No, today, she simply needed to find a way to come to terms with the curve ball life was throwing her.
Fresh tears stung the backs of her eyes as worries swirled in her head like the leaves fluttering around her feet.
But she continued on, putting one foot in front of the other, just like she’d have to do to survive the changes ahead. Somehow, someway, she’d manage to be a good mom and run her business. And through it all, the only thing she had to do was keep Gina from finding out she was pregnant with Noble/Nate’s baby.
That was one secret Ivy vowed to take to her grave.
CHAPTER TWELVE
After a long day at the ranch, Noble sat inside the Hangover, nursing a beer. On the jukebox a singer wailed out a country song about leaving a pretty girl with the bluest eyes in Texas. A caustic scoff rolled off his tongue. Four and a half months ago, he’d left the prettiest girl with the bluest eyes back in Vegas, along with his fucking libido.
Noble gnashed his teeth and cursed under his breath.
If he didn’t find a way to banish Ivy from his brain, he’d have to study Buddhism so he could become a monk. The zero desire to climb between the legs of any woman except Ivy’s was starting to worry him.
“That’s not what I’m saying, dammit,” Gina spat in a tone so angry it pulled Noble out of his internal pity party. Glancing up, he saw the bar owner and his twin scowling at one another. “You’re not listening to what I’m saying.”
“The hell I’m not,” Nate countered exasperatedly. “I’m just wondering why you don’t come right out and ask her what’s crawled up her ass and clear the air.”
“Because she’s the only real girlfriend I have in this town, besides your mom. I really like her and I’m not willing to risk losing that by getting all up in her face.”
“If she was such a real friend, she’d tell you what’s bothering her.”
Noble smirked as Gina bristled. Their conversation was about to get ugly.
“Nate?”
“Yes, my love?”
Nate’s voice was low. He reached up to touch her—fatal mistake, bro—but Gina slapped his hand away.
“Don’t. That’s not going to help.”
“What is?”
“I don’t know.” Gina exhaled a heavy sigh.
Noble wasn’t sure who or what the drama was all about, and honestly, he really didn’t care. “If you two are done fighting, can I have another beer?”
As Gina filled his mug from the spigot, Nate nuzzled in close behind her. “Just go over and talk to her in the morning. All right?”
“I’ll try,” Gina conceded.
Nate kissed the top of her head and gave a satisfied nod before glancing up at Noble.
“What are you doing here, man? It’s Saturday night. You’re usually banging a bed-bunny and her headboard right about now.”
Noble glanced at the clock on the wall and drained his mug of beer as he purposely blocked the twin connection shared with Nate.
“Funny you should say that. I need to go and…get busy,” he lied, hoping he’d truly blocked his brother out. “See you two lovebirds later. Oh, and no more arguing. You know what happens when you two fight.”
“Don’t say that,” Gina scolded. “Didn’t anyone ever teach you that you never invite negativity into your life by saying shit like that?”
“Nope,” Noble said with a wry grin as he lifted off the barstool. “I was too busy learning different ways to make the ladies scream.”
“Of course you were, you silly man-whore.” Gina chuckled and flashed him a wink.
“Catch y’all later,” he called out as he reached the front door.
Noble kept his internal barrier up until he was far outside of town. He hated hiding things from Nate, but he hated lying to the man even more. Life was pretty black-and-white as far as Noble was concerned. He didn’t like playing around in shades of gray. It rubbed him the wrong way.
Driving aimlessly toward the ranch, Noble knew if he returned home this early, questions would be asked. Instead of turning into the long gravel drive, he continued along the blacktop a half mile more. Slowing the truck, he turned onto a bumpy dirt road. The access path leading to the creek, cut straight through their property.
When he and his brothers were kids, the whole family would pile into his dad’s Suburban and drive down this same dusty path to the creek. While the boys splashed and swam in the cool springwater, his mom would shake out a huge quilt and sit in the shade watching them and laughing, or quietly read a book. Hours later, she’d unpack a picnic basket and they’d all sit on the blanket eating lunch as the warm wind dried their skin.
The memories sent a melancholy smile to tug Noble’s lips. Those days had been golden. Carefree. Happy. Growing up, Noble had heard the hushed murmurs and tsks of pity for the couples in town who’d separated or divorced. When he was seven years old, Noble began to worry that his parents might choose to take that same ominous path. When he’d finally gathered the courage to ask his mom about the state of her marriage, Nola simply smiled and hugged him tightly. She’d alleviated all his fears when she told him that she and his father made a vow to one another, and to God, to love, honor, and cherish each other until they died.
Noble spent the next twelve years convincing himself that the Grayson clan was impervious to the embarrassing and life-altering horrors of divorce. Then Sawyer married Sara, and a short time later, the safety bubble Noble had built around him cracked. Fissures had grown into ragged, sharp-edged maws that opened up and shredded his guileless idealism. The taboo curse of infidelity had ripped Sawyer apart, along with his marriage. The seeds of mistrust in monogamy had been sown in Noble’s mind.
“So if you’re never going to marry anyone, why can’t you let Ivy go?” Noble asked out loud. “She was just another partner to chase pleasure with.”
Even as those last words left his lips, Noble knew the time he’d spent with Ivy had fulfilled him far more than simply pleasure. Still, he didn’t want to acknowledge or even let his conscience suggest that the blonde-haired, blue-eyed beauty had ruined him for all others.
But as his grandma Grayson would always say, the proof is in the pudding.
“Fuck!” Noble growled.
When he crested the tiny hill, his headlights illuminated the black F-350 truck parked near the edge of the creek. He knew instantly that it was Ned’s truck.
As Noble pulled to a stop, his older brother quickly shielded his face until he killed the engine and the headlights. Then Noble climbed out of his truck.
“I’m fine. Go
on home. Call April and tell her I’ll be home later.” Ned’s voice was thick with emotion, sending Noble’s senses on high alert.
“First of all, I haven’t even talked to April. And secondly, you’re not fine if you’re sitting out here by yourself. What the fuck is going on?”
“I just want some time alone. Go home, Noble,” Ned mumbled as he turned and plopped back down on a flattened patch of native sideoats grama grass.
With a shake of his head, Noble strode to where his brother sat and silently eased down beside him.
“I’m not leaving you here to brood alone. You’re my brother. If you need—”
“What I need I can’t have,” Ned interrupted curtly.
“Why not? What is it you need?”
“Because there’s no such thing as a crystal ball. No magic beans or pills or any other mystical supernatural shit that’ll give me the answers I need.”
Noble nodded, pondering how to get the man to open up and talk about what had him so agitated. “I guess the first thing to ask is, what’s the question?”
Ned scoffed. “Trust me, Noble. You can’t help me.”
Clearly his statement was meant as an insult, as it stung like a slap to the face. “Why not me?”
“Because you’re the poster child for anti-monogamy.”
“Just because I’m never saying I do doesn’t mean I don’t know shit about women. I know more about them than probably any other man in a hundred-mile radius.”
“Okay, Mr. Estrogen. What I’m about to tell you doesn’t leave this creek bank, understood?”
“I’ll take the blood brother oath,” Noble affirmed. “I’ll even get the knife out again like we did when we were young if you want me to.”
Ned shook his head and stared out across the prairie for several long minutes before he turned and inhaled a deep breath. “My wife’s gone and I don’t know where the fuck she went.”
A pang of fear slammed Noble’s gut. “What do you mean gone? Did you call Jasper?”
“No, I didn’t call Jasper. April’s not missing. She’s at the goddamn house…at least physically. But emotionally? Well, I have no fucking clue where that part is hiding.”
Immediately, Noble’s brain flipped back to the hospital as they all sat in the surgery waiting room. When the doctor finally had come out with the good news about Nate, April and Noble hadn’t shared so much as a kiss or a hug. Ned had simply squeezed his wife’s hand as she sent him a brittle smile.
“You’ve been struggling with this for months, haven’t you?”
Ned snapped his head up. His brows were slashed and eyes narrowed. “How did you know that?”
“I picked up on it the night of Nate’s surgery.”
“Yeah, that was a stellar day. April and I were in the middle of World War III when Norris knocked on the door and said Nate was missing.” Ned paused before a perturbed scoff rolled off his tongue. “After they found him in the field, April didn’t even want to come to the hospital to see if he was okay. She wanted to stay home and study her Bible.”
“Her Bible?” Noble echoed in confusion.
“She’s gotten real involved with the Ladies’ Auxiliary at the church. Every Wednesday she hosts a Bible study group. Reverend Thompson and a whole slew of women invade the living room to read and discuss passages.”
“You don’t join the discussions?”
“I’m sure Mom would love it if I did, but no, I talk to the man upstairs on my own.” Ned picked up a stone and tossed it into the creek with a plop. “I can’t even swear in my own house anymore without April taking me to task about it.”
Noble simply arched his brows and wrinkled his nose.
“This is way too much TMI, but we don’t make love anymore. We just fuck…but only when she thinks she’s ovulating so we can procreate. It’s only with the lights off, and her nightgown can’t be raised any higher than her goddamn navel. I haven’t seen my own wife’s tits for…fuck, I can’t even remember. She’s turned into a prude. I don’t even know who April is anymore. She’s definitely not the hot, horny woman I married.”
Noble didn’t have a clue in hell of what he was supposed to say to that.
“We used to make love on the back porch, under the stars. I loved watching her come in the moonlight. Now, all I can do is pull the memories out of my head and hope she’s enjoying what I’m doing to her, ’cause I honestly don’t even know if she comes for real anymore or is just faking it so I’ll cop a nut and get off her.”
Noble shook his head and scowled. “All of this because she got involved in the church?”
“I don’t know. All I know is everything between us started changing months ago and I can’t seem to put things back the way they were.” Ned picked up another stone and tossed it downstream. “So while I appreciate your offer to help, all your knowledge of women isn’t going to do shit, baby bro.”
“No, this is pretty much out of my wheelhouse. I’m sorry, man. I really am. Maybe you two should sit down with Reverend Thompson and talk about how intimacy is more than repopulating the earth.”
Ned shook his head. “No way. I don’t want everyone in town knowing my wife’s turned into a damn ice queen, or that I can’t satisfy her sexually anymore.”
“Dude!” Noble gaped. “It’s not you. You’re a Grayson…a sex machine, for fuck’s sake. None of us are lacking in the seduction department. Trust me.”
“I used to think so, but now I’m not so sure.”
“Have you tried to seduce her…do things to her you used to when you first met?”
A humorless chuckle slid from the back of Ned’s throat. “I just told you I haven’t seen my wife’s tits in eons. I haven’t had my mouth anywhere but the lips on her face for even longer than that.”
“Shit, man. That’s…that’s not normal.”
“Tell me about it.” Ned sighed and shook his head. “So, what the fuck are you doing out here? Can’t find any willing women to seduce tonight?”
“Just came out here to think as well.”
“About?”
“Nothing important,” Noble lied.
“Right. We both know that’s bullshit. What’s her name?”
“What makes you think it’s a woman?” Noble asked trying to deflect his brother’s all-too-accurate assessment.
“Why else would we both be out here, man? Someone’s fucking with your head just like April is fucking with mine.”
Noble considered opening his mouth and spilling his guts…revealing every spine-tingling detail of the unbelievable night he’d spent with Ivy. Ned might be able to offer some sage advice or insight on how to finally exorcise the woman’s ghost from his soul. But his brother’s plate was already full, overflowing, in fact. The last thing he needed was Noble whining like a pussy-whipped bitch.
“Nah, nobody’s fucking with my head except me.” Technically, he wasn’t lying. But self-preservation dictated he redirect the conversation about women off himself and back on Ned. “So, any idea what you’re going to do about April being such a prude?”
“Not a fucking clue.”
“Maybe you two should take a vacation, you know, go someplace romantic.”
“What was Las Vegas like?”
Noble’s heart sputtered.
Where my wildest, wettest dream came true.
He swallowed tightly and shook his head. “Nah. Take her to Colorado or someplace up in the mountains, where you two can be completely alone.”
“We’re alone in the country every damn day, Captain Obvious,” Ned taunted with a crooked grin. “It hasn’t done a bit of good. Just sayin’.”
“True. I don’t know, man. Take her to Disneyland. Teach her how to be…young at heart and spontaneous again.”
“Hmm,” Ned grunted. “You might be on to something there.”
“See? I’m more than just a talented sex machine.”
Ned actually laughed. “Spare me the details, man.”
“Jealous, I know.”
“No, man. I don’t want to barf listening to you brag about all your sexploits.”
“’Cause you’d get jealous.”
They both chuckled briefly before Ned turned somber. “Thanks for not leaving when I told you to go.”
Noble reached up and slapped his brother on the back. “No need to thank me, man. You need me? I’m always here, no matter what.”
“I appreciate that. I guess I’d better get back home.” Ned stood and stuck his hat on his head. “You staying?”
“Yeah, for a few. It’s peaceful here.”
“You sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah, man. I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. I hope you can find a way to reach April.”
“You and me both.”
The doubt in Ned’s voice made Noble frown. As his brother climbed into his pickup and drove away, he replayed their conversation. Noble couldn’t help but wonder if another Grayson divorce was on the horizon.
“Christ,” he muttered in disgust.
Life was complicated enough. Why anyone would want to add another person into the mix escaped him.
Yeah, but you’d love to add Ivy into that mix and you damn well know it, a little voice in the back of his head taunted.
“Maybe, but I’d never commit my life to her or any other woman,” he murmured to himself.
Noble tossed his hat on the ground and gazed up at the stars. Ivy was out there somewhere. He couldn’t help but wonder what she was doing. Or who was she with. That thought sent an unexpected spike of red-hot jealousy streaking through him. He scrubbed a hand over his face at the absurdity of his bewildering reaction.
“I need to get a goddamn grip,” he scolded himself. “It’s a Saturday night and I’m sitting in the dark, still pining for a girl I’ll never see again. Christ, I have to be the sorriest bastard on the whole damn planet.”
Repulsed by his inability to get his head screwed on straight, Noble plucked the cell phone from his jeans and started scrolling through his contacts.