by E. L. Todd
“I mean, you have to watch porn.”
“I already told you I did.” She turned back to her work, avoiding eye contact with me.
“But, a lot of it. Your moves are off the charts.”
“Well, that’s not what I was thinking when I did any of it.”
“Then what were you thinking?” I used to think of her as an innocent schoolteacher, not a sex-crazed animal. Now everything was different. She was a classy porn star, as contradictory as that sounded.
“I don’t know,” she said with a shrug. “I was really turned on, and I wanted to make you feel good. Honestly, I’m not thinking a whole lot. I just do things. My body seems to understand what to do next. I’m just in the moment.”
I grabbed her pen and returned the cap to the end. Then I tossed everything on the floor, wanting her full attention. I didn’t like sharing her with anyone—even her students. “I know what you mean.”
She eyed the pile on the hardwood floor. “Thanks…”
“I’ll clean it up later.”
She lay back down and turned to me, her body still naked under the sheets. Her blue eyes were electrifying. If I looked hard enough, I could see the spark in her eyes. A current ran wild through her, burning me with just a look. “Now that you have my full attention, what do you want?”
“You.” I moved on top of her, my face lingering inches above hers.
“You have me. Now what?”
“I want to know how you got so damn good in bed. Had a serious boyfriend in the past?”
“You really want to talk about an ex right now?” she asked. “What does it matter? And you’re the one who’s had an endless line of beautiful women riding you.”
“But I’ve only been in one relationship besides you. So, none of those count.”
Her hands slowly drifted to my shoulders then she cupped both sides of my neck. “I’ve never had a serious boyfriend. I’ve had boyfriends, but nothing I thought would last forever.”
“So, where did all this experience come from?”
“Nowhere. I just came out of my shell when I found the right person.”
My eyes softened, and I didn’t bother hiding it.
“You make me do things I wouldn’t normally do…because I’m comfortable with you. I don’t worry about looking stupid. I don’t worry I’ll do something you hate. I just…do what I want.”
“I’m glad you’re comfortable with me.” I brushed my nose against hers.
“So, you had a girlfriend once upon a time?”
I didn’t want to talk about her. We ended nearly two years ago, and I didn’t think about her anymore. The pain she inflicted slowly ebbed away when Taylor walked into my life. I finally believed I could trust someone again. Taylor made me an optimist. She made me believe I could do things that weren’t possible before. “Yeah.”
“When was this?”
“A while ago.” I hated moving my lips. I hated talking about it. But I told Taylor she could ask me anything and that I was an open book. But I didn’t expect her to question me about this.
“What happened?”
“We broke up.” I answered her questions automatically, trying to disconnect as much as possible. If I thought about her too much, I would feel sick to my stomach. I would remember how foolish I felt walking into that bar and seeing her kiss her ex.
Taylor examined my face, noticing the anger starting to emerge as well as the regret. “If you don’t want to talk about something, you can just tell me.”
“I told you that you could ask me anything.”
“But if it bothers you, I won’t.”
I wanted her to stop, but I couldn’t bring myself to make the request. So I held my silence and waited for the questions to continue.
“How about this?” She cupped my face and fingered my strands of hair. “You tell me everything when you’re ready to talk. I’m here to listen whenever that time is.”
Gratitude washed over me in powerful waves. I was thankful the awkward conversation had been avoided, and I didn’t have to go back on my word. Taylor gave me a lot of leniency when I didn’t deserve it, and I was grateful for that. “Okay.”
She gave me that heartfelt smile I adored. “Okay. Now, are you going to feed me or what?”
I chuckled. “You want to go out?”
“Well, I may not be mad anymore, but you still have some making up to do.”
“I’d love to.” I’d make up to her for the rest of my life. As long as I got to be with her, I didn’t care what we did. Sitting across from her in a restaurant where everyone knew she was mine sounded like the greatest way to spend my time.
***
She finished her food then dabbed her small mouth with a napkin. She always ate with the kind of manners the Queen of England possessed. Her rigid posture and elegance directly contrasted against the dirty things she did to me just hours ago.
And that made me like it more.
Her eyes scanned the restaurant until they lingered on a young couple sitting next to us. The man held his wife’s hand on the table, their wedding rings glinting under the candlelight. His eyes watched every little thing she did, and even I could see the love written all over his face. Taylor must have seen it too because she continued to watch them.
My hand reached across the table until it found hers. I locked our fingers together and felt her distant pulse through her soft skin. The moment she felt me, she turned her eyes back on me. “So, when are you coming to dinner with my parents?” I gave her the same look my neighbor gave to his wife, wanting her to feel just as special.
“Uh, never.”
“Come on.” I rubbed my thumb across her hand.
“Your mom, I like. Your dad… I’m not his biggest fan.”
“I know you guys have had awkward conversations, but he doesn’t dislike you as a person.”
“You weren’t there, Volt. You don’t know what he said to me.”
“Then enlighten me.” My father was a good man and treated everyone fairly. Maybe I was biased because he raised me, but I still understood those traits.
“He told me I wasn’t what he thought I was, and he was already looking for replacements. Without even giving me the benefit of the doubt, he sided with the parents. He lets them walk all over him. He doesn’t stand up for anything he believes in.”
We just hit a difficult patch. I felt obligated to defend my father, but I also understood Taylor’s sensitivity. I wanted to say something to fix the situation, but there was no good approach.
So I held my silence.
Taylor stared at me like she expected a response.
Maybe this would be more difficult than I thought. “I’m not saying that wasn’t difficult to go through. I remember how upset you were when I came to the apartment. But…he was just doing his job.”
“By firing a good teacher?” she snapped.
“By keeping the majority happy.”
She pulled her hand away, steam coming out of her ears.
Once she broke contact, I knew this would be a difficult night. “Baby, I’m not taking his side, and I’m not taking yours. I’m just saying, we can get through this.”
“Your father is never going to like me. When I see him in the staff room, he avoids me.”
“Maybe he assumes you hate him.”
“I don’t hate him…but I don’t like him.”
“He’s probably just avoiding future conflict. I’m telling you, my dad doesn’t have a mean bone in his body. He hates those kinds of conversations. He only has them when he has to.”
“Even so…” She took a long drink of her wine, washing it down in a single gulp.
“My mom loves you. She met you under unbiased terms, and she won’t change her opinion just because of my father.”
“You obviously don’t know how a marriage works.”
If her parents didn’t like me, it would get under my skin. I understood that feeling all too well. But I wasn’t going to let this bump in the
road ruin us. “Baby, don’t stress about it.”
“He’s my coworker. Of course I’m stressed about it. To make things worse, he’s my boss.”
“He won’t be your boss forever. Apply to a different school at the end of the year just to make things less uncomfortable.”
“I probably will, regardless,” she said coldly.
I grabbed her hand again and was thankful she didn’t pull away. “This is the bottom. Things will only get better from here.” I stared at her until she met my gaze. She avoided eye contact for a while before she finally gave up the fight. She looked at me, her gaze more vulnerable than a moment ago. “Whether they like you or not, it doesn’t change this.” I brushed my thumb across her hand. “Nothing will change this.”
After a moment of staring, her fingers moved against the inside of my palm. She returned the affection warmly, coming out of the hard shell she encased herself in. “I’m sorry I’m being a drama queen about this.”
“You aren’t being a drama queen.”
“It’s just the worst way possible to start a relationship with your boyfriend’s father. He probably thinks I’m incompetent and stupid.”
“Trust me, he doesn’t think that.”
“Then why threaten to fire me?”
“He thinks you aren’t political enough for the job, that’s all. And clearly, you’ve changed his mind.”
“Because I started a generic teaching lesson and made my classroom boring as hell.”
I shrugged because I didn’t know what other response I could give her. “Get a few years of experience, and then change up your classroom. When you have that kind of practice, you’ll have a better understanding of what to do. You’re honestly being too hard on yourself, and you’re assuming my father thinks you’re an idiot when he doesn’t.”
“You don’t know that.”
Actually, I do. “He’s talked about you to me before.”
“He has?” She raised an eyebrow.
“He didn’t call you out by name, but I knew he was referring to you.”
“And what did he say?” She stopped moving her fingers against mine.
“Mainly talked about the issue with the parents. There was never anything personal about you.”
“When did this happen?”
“Shortly after we became friends.” There was no point in hiding anything from her anymore. Everything was out in the open.
“That was seven months ago…”
“Exactly,” I said. “Seven months in the past. We should just let it go.”
“If he had this problem seven months ago, why didn’t he speak with me?”
“I… I’m not sure.”
She pulled her hand away altogether, and her eyes narrowed to slits. The cogs were turning in her head, and ideas were swarming. “He didn’t say anything because you spoke to him…”
Why did she figure that out? Having a smart girlfriend wasn’t as great as I thought it would be. “Not exactly. I just told him to give it some time before—”
She threw her napkin down and jumped out of her chair. “I can’t believe this.”
“Whoa, hold on.” I stood up the moment she did. “What’s wrong?”
Her eyes were hotter than any fire I’d seen. “What’s wrong? I’m absolutely humiliated. That’s what’s wrong.” Her voice rose, and everyone at the nearby tables was staring at us. “You had to ask your father to keep me on the payroll. That’s just…” She threw her arms down. “I have to go.”
“Taylor, come on.” I tried to grab her by the wrist, but she stormed out. I hadn’t paid the tab so I couldn’t just walk out. I quickly dug for my wallet until I found the cash I needed and threw it on the table. “Taylor.” I tried to get her attention, but she was already out the door.
I left the restaurant and caught up to her on the sidewalk. “Baby, talk to me.”
“Just leave me alone, Volt.”
“You’re making a bigger deal out of this than necessary.”
She turned around and put a hand against my chest. “You had to beg him to let me keep my job. That’s so mortifying. Maybe you don’t get it because you’re perfect at everything, but that kind of pity is such a slap in the face. You should have just let him fire me.”
“Taylor—”
“Good night, Volt.” She turned around and walked away, her hips swaying with her anger.
I watched her go and couldn’t believe how fate played out. After the closure of one argument, another ensued. I just got her back when she slipped through my fingers all over again.
Motherfucker.
***
“Are you sure everything is alright?” Mom sat across from me at the table while Dad sat at the head.
“I’m fine.” I picked at my food like a bird and didn’t eat much, despite how much I liked my mother’s cooking. “Just have a lot on my mind.”
“Please tell me Taylor is still around.” Mom threatened me with her eyes, prepared to go postal if I said I was single again.
“She is.”
She clutched her chest while releasing a sigh, clearly relieved there was still a potential wedding on the horizon.
“Actually, she’s the reason I’m here. We need to talk.” I turned to Dad, dreading this conversation.
He finished chewing his steak while he stared at me blankly. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Because this concerns you.”
“I haven’t even met her, so I don’t know why things just became so serious.” He sipped his wine then took a bite of his mashed potatoes.
“Well, it turns out that Taylor works at your school. She’s the science teacher.” The one you almost fired.
Dad chewed slowly, savoring every bit of his food as well as my words. “Sorry?”
“What are you talking about, dear?” Mom asked.
“Ms. Thomas is my girlfriend. I’ve known her since she started working at Bristol Academy.” My dad wouldn’t hold a grudge against Taylor, but I would have to ask him to go out of his way to make her feel welcome if this was going to work. “I haven’t said anything because I know the two of you have had a tense relationship. I was hoping you could settle your differences before I introduced you to each other…but that doesn’t seem like it’s going to work.”
“Wait.” He swallowed his food and quickly wiped his mouth with a napkin. “That woman is your girlfriend? The woman your mother loves so much?”
“Yes.” I had a headache since I didn’t get any sleep last night. All I thought about was Taylor and how pissed she was. She didn’t respond to any of my text messages through the night. “I just told her that you were my father, and she wasn’t happy about it. She thinks you hate her.”
“Hate her?” Mom asked incredulously. “We could never hate such a sweet girl like that.”
“I definitely don’t hate her, son,” Dad said. “I admit we haven’t had the best relationship so far, but I certainly don’t think poorly of her. Administration can be difficult, and sometimes, I have to have the talks I don’t want to have. It was nothing against her personally.”
“I know.” I predicted he would say all of this. “But she’s paranoid that you despise her. Maybe you could talk to her…and patch things up.” I wasn’t the type of guy to ask my father to do something so petty, but I had to make this relationship work.
I wasn’t losing her.
“Uh, I guess,” he said. “You really think it’ll do any good?” He was a busy man with more pressing matters on his mind. He wasn’t the most emotional guy either. Talking about intimate issues like this wasn’t his forte.
“Dad, I wouldn’t be asking if it wasn’t important. She won’t even talk to me right now.”
Mom broke down at the comment. “Dear, talk to her. Please.”
Mom’s emotional distress actually helped out for once.
Dad wouldn’t deny anything Mom wanted, so he gave in. “Sure. I’ll give it a try.”
“Thank you.” I looked hi
m in the eye as I said it. “I really want to make this right with her. We just got into another fight because I did something stupid, and I’m afraid I’m going to chase her off. I can’t afford to lose her.”
“Aww…” Mom clutched her chest again. “My son is in love.”
I didn’t correct her because that would just lead to another argument. “Thanks, Dad. I appreciate it.”
He gripped me by the shoulder just the way he used to. “You know I’d do anything for my boy.” He patted my shoulder before he dropped his hand. “But I have to say, I’m surprised by the whole thing.”
“Because she’s out of my league?” I asked with a chuckle.
“No.” He refilled his glass with wine. “I thought she was dating another teacher.”
My body shut down at the comment—immediately. I stopped breathing and moving, just absorbing the words that left his mouth. But my heart picked up in pace. It slammed against my ribcage with loud thumps, shaking my entire frame. “You’re mistaken.” Taylor would never do that to me—not to anyone. She was my best friend, and the last thing she would ever do was hurt me.
“Every time I see her, he’s right behind her. And vice versa.”
I couldn’t shake the pain that formed right in my gut.
“They’re the same age and teach the same subject—”
“Then they probably have a lot in common and are good friends.” And that was all. There was nothing wrong with Taylor being friendly with her coworkers. And I couldn’t blame the guy for being attracted to her. He would have to be stupid not to be.
Dad dropped the argument. “Alright. I’ll talk to her.”
I looked down at my food and tried to stay calm. There was a logical explanation for my dad’s observations, and I was sure nothing concerning was going on. If this were a different woman, I’d be worried about something going on behind my back, but this was Taylor. She wouldn’t ever cause me pain.
But there was one thing bothering me.
One thing killing me.
Why hadn’t she mentioned this guy?
***
I banged on her door and refused to stop until she answered. I was tired of the silent treatment, even though it’d only been twenty-four hours. But I went the past five days without her, and that was already gruesome.