He nodded and followed me into the gym. Wishing I had a dark hole to climb into, I followed behind Lee as he climbed up the bleachers and threaded his way through people till we were at the top. I was grateful to feel the cool cinder block wall behind me. I felt less exposed this way, even if I was in a room with hundreds of people. Everyone was talking and laughing, making my silence seem more pronounced.
Sitting close to Lee, I appreciated the comfort I felt with him, but I noticed that his attention was somewhere else. Following the direction of his eyes, I saw that he was looking at a group of teachers standing near the doorway on the other side of the gym. His eyebrows were drawn together in concentration and I realized that he was looking at Mr. Greeley, who stood draped over his crutches as he talked to another teacher.
“You don’t think it’s true, do you?” I asked, finally needing to sort out the disturbing idea that Jordan had planted in my head.
For an answer, Lee shrugged and slightly shook his head. He was quiet for a while. Then the cheerleaders came out onto the floor and started a cheer where the student body was supposed to participate. My school spirit was practically zero right then, but watching Jordan smiling and cheering like she didn’t have a care in the world sure put me in the fighting spirit. What I wouldn’t have given for a poisoned dart gun right then.
“What do you think?” Lee finally asked.
I gave up trying to slay Jordan with my glare, and said, “I don’t know. I mean, my mom never dates, and Mr. Greeley isn’t her type anyway.”
Lee hesitated, obviously sorting out his words. “If she never dates, how do you know what her type is?”
That gave me a pause. “I guess I don’t. What if they got married? How weird would that be?”
“Weird, maybe, but he’d probably make a pretty cool stepfather. It does make things more complicated though.”
“What do you mean?”
“First, can I ask you something? Do you really not want to date, or do you just not want to, um, round the bases like your mom is worried about?”
It took me a second to figure out what he was talking about. When I finally did, I replied, “I wouldn’t mind dating, if the guy was fine with not getting past first base.” I think Lee was using the analogy so I wouldn’t be embarrassed, but I felt my face flush anyway.
He grinned at me, finding me funny I’m sure, and said, “That makes me a perfect candidate.”
“Really?”
His expression grew serious and he said firmly, “Really. I was going to ask if you wanted to go out this weekend, but it wouldn’t do any good, huh?”
I shook my head, really bummed.
“Would you have said yes, if you could have?”
He looked nervous waiting to hear my answer, which was just bizarre. What girl would ever turn him down? I should probably play it cool, but we’d already been too honest about other things to hold back now. “Definitely,” I told him.
He seemed to relax when he heard my answer, and said, “Well, I haven’t had much time to think about it, but I was hoping that if we couldn’t actually go on dates, maybe we could try just, you know, being a couple at school. But if Mr. Greeley saw us together, and told your mom, you’d probably get in trouble, huh?”
His voice was casual, like it wasn’t the most earth-shattering thing he could have said to me right then. I tried to process it, wondering if he could mean anything other than what it sounded like. How was it possible to feel so excited and so miserable at the same time? “It’s worse than you think.”
“Why?”
“Have you met the art teacher?”
“No,” he answered, clearly confused. “I don’t take art.”
“Her name is Ms. Whitfield.”
“Whitfield? Please tell me it’s not your mom.”
“I wish I could.”
“Well…shoot.” It was the closest I’d ever heard him come to cursing. He slumped back against the wall and stared out at the pep rally with me. Everyone was cheering as Coach Hatfield introduced the starters for that night. It all seemed to be happening at a distance from us.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault,” he said. He stared up at the high ceiling and shook his head. “Wouldn’t you know I’d have a thing for a girl I can’t date.”
“You have a thing for me?” Sometimes I just need things spelled out.
“No, Sienna, I just took journalism and yearbook for the fun of it.” His sarcasm was odd mix of frustration and teasing.
“Huh.”
“Don’t tell me you couldn’t tell I liked you. Haven’t you noticed that I haven’t left last hour early for practice even once? That needs to change, but not if that’s the only time I get to spend with you.”
I thought for a moment, examining the conflict between what I wanted and what my mom expected.
“My mom doesn’t want me to have a steady boyfriend, but that doesn’t mean we can’t be really good friends. I’m allowed to hang out with friends you know. Besides, my mom doesn’t usually go anywhere at school but the art room and the teachers’ lounge.”
“What about Mr. Greeley?”
“I still can’t believe he’s dating my mom. Maybe it’s not even an issue.”
“Maybe,” he agreed. But he didn’t look too sure.
Chapter 5
After all that drama, journalism was rough and I was furious with Jordan for it. Mr. Greeley’s classroom had always been my refuge at school, a place I could relax. Now, I felt on edge and suspicious.
When Mr. Greeley put some lip balm on, I wondered if he was keeping his lips supple for kissing my mom. When he walked by and I smelled his cologne, I tried to remember if I’d ever smelled it on him before. Then I noticed that he was combing his hair a little different than he used to.
My suspicions were driving me crazy, but when I began to imagine them making out after a date, I felt like hurling. Trying to will the feeling away, I put my head down on my desk and let Mr. Greeley’s lecture on how to write a caption roll over me. I thought of everything I could think of to control my imagination, and I soon found that thinking about Lee was the only thing that did the trick.
If it hadn’t been for Jordan, I would be over the moon right now. Lee wanted to date me. Not only that, but he wasn’t put off by not being able to. He still wanted to be with me. It was amazing. Everything would be perfect if only my mom would let me date him. I mean, she could date.
Then I was tortured once again by the thought that she was dating Mr. Greeley behind my back.
When the bell rang, I sat up and shot out the door. It was the first time since Lee had moved in that I’d been excited that journalism was over. It was also the first time I’d ever been glad to go to a math class. I heard Lee call my name so I waited for him in the hallway outside.
“You’ve got trig now, right?” he asked.
Surprised, I nodded. “How’d you know?”
“You always bring your book to class,” he said, pointing to the textbook tucked under my arm with my notebook. “Come on. I’ll walk with you.”
“But you always go the opposite way. You’re going to be late!” I protested.
“I can make it. Don’t stress.”
So I didn’t worry about it anymore because I definitely needed the moral support right then. When we got there, Lee said he’d see me next hour. I watched him walk away with a long, quick stride, still amazed at the changes in my world since this morning. The last thing I wanted to do right then was focus on trigonometry. Unfortunately, I had a test.
Fifty minutes later, I turned in my test right before the bell rang. I felt pretty good about it. I had studied hard last night, and focusing on the problems had actually helped to relax me. They were way less complicated than the other problems that had found their way into my life.
When I got to the yearbook room, Lee was standing in the hall outside. He was facing the bulletin board looking at the poster I’d put there on Monday. Some creep had
poked holes in Tyson’s eyes and enlarged his nostrils with ink so that he looked like a weird mutant pig.
“Hmmph! That’s nice,” I said, taking it down. “Oh well, it’s served its purpose.”
“Did you get many people to follow your blog?” Lee asked as I crunched the poster into a wad. He looked oddly satisfied as he watched the destruction.
“More than I even expected, and this is just the beginning.”
“And Tyson was the best you could come up with to build up your followers?”
“What’s wrong with him?”
“Nothing, I guess. I barely know the guy. He doesn’t talk much.”
“Exactly. He’s so quiet that nobody pays much attention to him even though he’s so good looking.”
“Well, you obviously paid attention to him. What’s so good looking about him anyway?”
I shot him a look that clearly said “What are you talking about?” before I grasped that his posture was more rigid and his expression slightly antagonistic. Our relationship had undergone a subtle change between friendship and whatever we were now, and it felt strange to realize I had such an influence on his emotions.
Thinking quickly, I said, “Well, you have to admit that even though he’s not quite in your league when it comes to looks, he’s got a certain all American charm. He’s also photogenic, so when I got this awesome picture of him, I couldn’t help taking advantage of it. It’s kind of an experiment,” I admitted reluctantly.
“What kind of experiment?”
I was relieved to see his shoulders relax, but I hesitated over how much to tell him. I mean, just as he cared what I thought of him, I was anxious for his good opinion. My image experiment wasn’t a terrible thing to do or anything, but I didn’t exactly have pure motives over it either. After today, I was determined to dethrone Jordan as the queen of Haskins High. Finally, I said, “To see if I can change people’s image with photography.”
“Hmmm. Did you ask Tyson if he wanted you to change his image?”
“No, but he’s such a nice guy that he deserves to be popular.”
“If he really is a nice guy, that’s the last thing he deserves,” Lee replied dryly. “Hey, since you’re into experiments, I wonder if you’d be interested in doing one to test Mr. Greeley?”
“What for?”
“To see if he’ll talk to your mom about us.”
“But there can’t be an us, remember?”
“Oh, there’s an us, even if we can’t put a label on it. So, about Mr. Greeley, are you in? It could help you figure out if he’s dating your mom.”
“That depends on what you want to do.”
He leaned closer and murmured, “We could go into class holding hands.”
Wow, he had a fabulous voice and he’d never spoken to me with that deep, chocolaty tone before. It made me feel all quivery. Maybe I was an idiot to hesitate, but I was concerned. “If anyone else saw us and word got around, forget Mr. Greeley, my mom might hear about it. In fact, she definitely would.”
“What’s the worst she would do?”
“For holding hands with someone? I don’t know. She’s never specifically said I can’t hold hands, but I think she would be mad. To her, any sign that I’m getting involved with a specific guy would be out. She’d probably give me a scary lecture, tell me to cut it out, and threaten me with dire consequences if I didn’t.”
“That’s not too bad. What do you say we risk it? Look. I haven’t seen anyone else go in yet, so how about if we go in now before someone else gets here? I’ll take your hand as we go through the door so no one out here sees us, and I’ll hold it until I’m sure Mr. Greeley has seen. Then we’ll wait and see if your mom says something about it.”
“That could work,” I said. Except that it might have other consequences. I was pretty sure that once we held hands, I would want to do it again. But it was a big a temptation and such a little infringement of my mom’s rule that I gave in. Holding hands was not dating.
“Let’s go then,” Lee said. We moved towards the open doorway and Lee began to reach for my left hand. When he laced his fingers through mine, it was hard to keep my mind on anything but how great it felt. It was like every nerve ending in my body was focused on where our hands touched, and it felt natural and right. There was also a twinge of guilt shooting through me, though. I would never do this in front of my mom, because I knew she wouldn’t like it. What in the world was I going to do about this?
Hand in hand, we walked past Mr. Greeley. He was sitting at his desk, talking on his cell phone, and at first I didn’t think that he’d noticed us come in. Then, his eyes seemed to zero in on our clasped hands and he caught my eye, his heavy eyebrows drawing together.
I didn’t take it as a good sign, but it was hard to tell since he was still in the middle of his phone conversation. It sounded like he was talking with the rep from the company that published our yearbook. Deadlines were on the horizon and that always made Mr. Greeley anxious.
I stopped and tossed the crumpled up poster towards the trashcan. I missed and had to let go of Lee’s hand to pick it up. When I turned back around, I saw that he was grinning like it was hilarious that I’d missed such an easy shot.
We walked over to a large work table in the middle of the room. A few projects had been left out on it from the previous hour’s students, but he pushed them aside. He pulled two of the wheeled, plastic chairs over and we sat down. Grabbing a piece of scrap paper and a pencil from the table, he wrote, He definitely noticed.
I nodded my head and took the pencil from him. What do you think he thought of it?
Trading the pencil back and forth, we continued our written conversation as other members of the staff began to filter in.
Not sure, but he didn’t look happy.
He had nice handwriting - kind of careless, but still neat. My own writing looked loopy and feminine next to his. I wrote, Think he’ll tell her?
Even if he does, it was worth it, he answered.
I knew my cheeks were a little pink as I wrote, Sure, but you won’t be getting the lecture.
Good point. Good luck with that. I gasped indignantly and Lee grinned shamelessly. He wadded up the paper and tossed it across the room into the trashcan with perfect accuracy.
“Good shot.”
“Thanks. It’s kind of my thing.”
“Oh, right. Obviously, it isn’t mine - at least not anymore.”
“You used to play?”
“Yeah, but it takes up a lot of time with practices and games. Basketball season was always crazy busy, and I didn’t have much time for photography, so I gave it up.”
“You can’t need that much time for your photography.”
“I need more than you think. How’s basketball going for you anyway? Are you going to have a good team?”
Lee shrugged and rolled backwards in his chair a little as he turned to face me. “I think so, but it’s hard to tell. Coach says that some of our best players are on the football team so I haven’t practiced with them yet. The bad thing is, if they go to state, the seasons will overlap and we’ll have to play our first few games without them. Luckily, we won’t have to play any conference games without them.”
“That kind of stinks. Won’t it throw off the dynamic of everything to have players coming in that haven’t practiced with you?”
“Yeah, but it can’t be helped. Has this school always been so good at football?”
“It has been for as long as I can remember. Are you going to the game tonight?”
“I’m planning on it.”
“Good,” Mr. Greeley said from behind me. Startled, I turned and looked up at him, surprised I hadn’t heard him approach on his crutches.
He was actually kind of good looking, in an older, scruffy kind of way. I’d never thought about it much before, but I wondered if he might seem attractive to a 35 year old who hadn’t dated since high school. Then a thought occurred to me. What if she had dated and I’d been as clueless abou
t it as I had been this time? I felt seriously betrayed by my own mother. I thought we talked about everything.
“Why’s that, Mr. Greeley?” Lee asked, pulling me back to what was going on.
“I worried about Sienna taking pictures last week. Do you think you could spot for her at the game tonight?”
“Sure. What do I need to do?”
“Just stand by her on the sideline and make sure she doesn’t get leveled by any overgrown football players.”
My eyes met Lee’s and I could tell we were thinking the same thing. Mr. Greeley was actually throwing us together.
“I should be able to handle that,” Lee said.
As Mr. Greeley nodded and turned to go, I smiled at Lee, glad to feel some of the tension seeping out of me. Lee smiled back, and we both moved to get to work on our different projects. As I logged onto a computer however, Mr. Greeley turned back abruptly and asked, “Sienna, did you know that your mom has gate duty tonight?”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Well, I thought you might like to know that you’ll have two people keeping an eye on you at the game tonight,” he said cryptically. Then he glanced over at Lee in a pointed way, and I finally got what he was saying. He was warning me not to do anything with Lee at the game because my mom would be there. Then he continued, “Oh, and, no more pda in the classroom. Let’s consider this your warning.”
I nodded and turned my blushing, guilty face towards my computer screen so no one would see it. Did he have to say that in front of everyone? Lee was at the computer next to me, so I glanced sideways at him, and he winked at me.
My heart skipped and I felt better for a moment, but black thoughts pulled at me. I was pretty certain now that Mr. Greeley knew I wasn’t allowed to date. It wasn’t likely he would know that unless my mom had told him. He didn’t go to church with us, after all, and he wouldn’t have heard from Jordan.
And how did Mr. Greeley just happen to know my mom had gate duty? I had a feeling most teachers were like my mom and only cared about when they were scheduled for it. But maybe her turn with gate duty was interfering with their love life.
Candid (True Images Series) Page 6