by Joyce Alec
Smiling gently, Catherine tried to reassure her mother, knowing she was unable to express all the deep emotions in her heart. “Mama, Linton will not make me miserable. I am quite sure of it. He has changed, or is trying to, at the very least, and I find that I trust him.” Even saying such a thing out loud brought a smile of both surprise and happiness to Catherine’s face. It was as though Linton was slowly becoming the person she had once known, before he had turned into a scoundrel, and that could not help but make her glad.
Lady Hewson shook her head at her. “Catherine, we have been trying to get through all that has happened with Lord Linton for some time. You have been upset, you have cried, I have cried… and now I discover that you intend to marry him after all?” The frustration on her face grew. “My dear, did we go through all that for naught? I thought… I thought Lord Kerr was…” She trailed off, looking at Catherine with a mixture of irritation and puzzlement.
“Lord Kerr is not the man I thought,” Catherine replied crisply, determined not to talk about the man more than necessary. “Lord Linton was kind enough to show me that.”
Her mother frowned in confusion, and Catherine sighed inwardly, knowing she was going to have to explain a little more. “Mama, I thought that marriage to Lord Kerr would be one of love and shared companionship, but it now seems that he was only interested in the wealth I would bring with me.”
Lady Hewson’s eyes widened as she drew in a sharp breath. “Surely not, Catherine!”
Catherine’s lips tugged with a sad smile. “It is so, Mama. I did not believe it at first, either, but it is quite true. Lord Kerr told me as much himself.”
“And so you will marry Lord Linton instead? Even though you do not care for him?”
“But I do care for him. I know him entirely,” Catherine said. “There is no disguise with Lord Linton, no pretense. I know him through and through. It is quite right that I do not love him in the way I once thought I loved Lord Kerr, but that does not seem of such great importance now. He will be a good and kind husband, and we can rekindle the friendship we once shared. I think it will be enough for me.”
***
“So?”
Linton grinned down at Catherine as they sat in the carriage, riding around Hyde Park at the fashionable hour. It was only their first public excursion since news of their engagement had gone around society only the prior day, and Catherine could not help but feel a little nervous.
“You know what I am asking you,” she chuckled when Linton did nothing but smile at her. “Did my father draw up a reasonable contract?”
Catherine had been both embarrassed and pleased to discover that her father had drawn up a contract for Linton to sign, one which would only allow him access to Catherine’s fortune in small increments. It would also be handed over to Catherine entirely should he prove himself unworthy of her. Catherine’s heart had swelled with love over such a thing, aware that this was how her father showed his care for her.
“It went very well, and all is in hand,” Lord Linton replied with a broad smile. “And yes, of course I signed it. In fact, I signed it without hesitation. Your fortune is of no importance to me. And, as you know, I intend to prove myself to you in whatever way I can.”
“Yes, I am aware of that,” Catherine murmured, glancing out of the carriage window. “In fact, you have already done so, although it clearly is not enough for my father.”
Linton chuckled. “And rightly so! It honors him to show such a great level of concern for his daughter.
Their eyes met for a moment, and Catherine was filled with warmth, feeling quite content with her engagement and upcoming marriage. It was as though Lord Linton, in proving himself to her, had become the answer to all of her problems, solving them in one single act.
“It is a good thing you know me so well, Kitty,” Linton said, leaning across the carriage to take her hand. “You know my foibles and my shortcomings and have never once held your tongue in order to correct me.” He grinned at her, his eyes alight. “Do you recall when you caught me taking apples from Lord March’s apple tree?”
Catherine could not help but laugh, remembering the incident all too clearly. “Yes, and I recall the way I told you off in such a loud tone that you fell from the tree with a thump!”
Linton grinned at the shared memory, his eyes never leaving hers. “I think I lost my way when we drifted apart,” he said quietly. “Mayhap if I had always had you by my side, then I would not have become such a rogue.”
Catherine did not know what to say, growing very aware of how his fingers were tracing the back of her hand. Something curled in the pit of her belly, spreading heat through her limbs.
“I suppose I had to go to Eton, of course, but I should have ensured my behavior remained tempered,” he finished. “Your voice was always my conscience, Kitty. I just became used to ignoring it.”
“I have never heard you speak in such a way before,” Catherine murmured. “This is quite new to my ears.”
His smile was warm. “I suppose I never wanted to admit it to you. But now that we are to be wed, I shall always have you as my conscience, and I do not think I will be easily able to ignore you.”
Catherine tilted her head and looked at her friend, seeing him in an entirely new light. He appeared more than earnest, and there was no hint of guile in his expression.
This was the Linton she knew, the one from her growing years. The one who was kind and compassionate, even if he did steal apples from Lord March. He was quite right to say that she had been his conscience, for she had never held back from telling him what he ought not to do. Her heart broke open with a warmth and a kinship long forgotten, her entire being desperate to believe that he really had changed back into her friend from childhood.
Linton patted her hand, smiling at her before dropping a firm kiss onto the back of her hand, making heat rush up her arm and into her core. He sat back and looked out of the window, apparently quite at ease with what he had done whilst Catherine sat there, entirely stunned at such a feeling.
This was now the second time she had experienced such a strong reaction to Linton’s gentle display of affection. It meant nothing, of course, for she was quite sure Linton did not love her, and she certainly could have no feelings towards him. The idea was quite ridiculous. They were friends and nothing more, and Linton had already promised her—while her cheeks had burned furiously—that he would not press any kind of physical attentions on her in their marriage until she was quite ready.
“Ah, look!” Linton exclaimed, rapping on the carriage roof. “There is your dear friend waving at us.”
“Alice!” Catherine exclaimed, seeing her friend walk towards her, leaving her husband talking with some other gentlemen. She quickly descended from the carriage whilst Linton instructed the driver to keep driving through the circuit so as not to hold up any of the other carriages.
“My dear Catherine!” Alice exclaimed, catching Catherine’s hands and squeezing them gently. “How wonderful to see you! It has been so long since you last called upon me!”
A stab of guilt pricked Catherine’s heart. “I am sorry for that, Alice. I meant to call, but there has been a great deal going on.”
“So I see,” Alice replied with a slight smile as Lord Linton approached them. “And are you happy, Catherine? You think this is the right path for you?”
“I do,” Catherine stated quietly, aware of Lord Linton’s presence drawing near to her. “I have not changed my mind yet.”
Alice lifted one eyebrow as Linton gave her a deep bow. “And are you proving yourself, my lord?” she asked, not even waiting to greet him. “I will not have you hurt Catherine.”
Linton did not seem in the least bit offended. “I have every intention of proving myself to both Catherine and to her friends,” he answered with another short bow. “I do hope you will attend our wedding.”
“Of course I shall,” Alice replied, never taking her eyes from Linton. “Unless I can convince Catherine of he
r folly, first.”
Catherine’s eyes widened in shock at Alice’s candor, but to her very great relief, Lord Linton only laughed, putting one hand around Catherine’s waist. “I see I shall have to work hard to show you how much I have changed,” he said, still laughing. “I have not made a good impression on you, have I?”
“No, you have not,” Alice declared. “Do you not recall your terrible behavior towards Catherine at the bookshop? I cannot have a good opinion of you since I saw you use her for your own ends.”
“Not even when he has done so much in recompense?” Catherine asked her friend, finding herself a little protective of Lord Linton. “Surely you have heard what he has been doing recently?”
Alice’s expression grew surprised as she saw the sudden flash of defensiveness in Catherine’s green eyes. “Yes,” she murmured, glancing at Lord Linton. “I suppose that does make a difference.”
“Good,” Catherine stated as Linton tightened his arm around her waist just a fraction. “Now, shall we walk for a while? The air is warm, and the day is pleasant, so there is no need to sully it with angry words.”
Alice kept her eyes on Lord Linton for another moment or so before turning back to her, the fight gone from her expression. “I must return to my husband,” she said, pressing Catherine’s hand. “Do call on me soon, will you not?”
“I will,” Catherine promised, smiling at her friend as the tense atmosphere around them lessened. “Very soon, I assure you.”
“I look forward to it,” Alice muttered, inclining her head towards Lord Linton before taking her leave.
Lord Linton watched her go, a small smile on his lips. “You defended me valiantly, Kitty. You did not need to do so.”
Catherine looked up at him and tucked her arm into his as they began to walk around the park. “Of course I did,” she said. “You are to be my husband, are you not? Alice need not worry about me any longer. I have made up my mind.”
Linton’s eyes grew warm, his expression tender. “You are a marvel,” he murmured, walking away from the trail of carriages. “A wonder, in fact. I am truly blessed.”
Catherine could not help but blush at his compliments. As she walked alongside him, she began to feel quite settled within herself. The friendship she had once shared with Linton was beginning to grow yet again, and with it, warmth had begun to blossom in her heart. She felt more than happy with him, which came as a rather alarming surprise.
Could she possibly feel something more for him? As much as she did not want to even consider it, Catherine had to admit that there was the chance she might grow fond of him. Had she not already been feeling a few strange sensations when he had taken her hand or kissed her cheek?
Her thoughts in disarray, Catherine stumbled suddenly as they entered a small, secluded copse of trees, only for Linton to catch her. Carefully setting her on her feet, he eyed her carefully, his hands now on her waist.
“Are you all right?” he asked, sounding worried. “You are not growing weary, I hope? I know this has all been rather sudden, and I would not blame you if—”
“I am quite all right,” Catherine interrupted hastily. “I simply was not looking where I was going.”
Linton’s hands remained settled on her waist, his dark brown eyes piercing her own. Catherine drew in a shuddering breath, aware that they were quite secluded. She could not account for the way her body was bursting to life, her heart thundering in her chest as he raised one hand and ran his fingers lightly down her cheek.
“You are such a beautiful woman,” he murmured, his hand gently brushing her auburn curls. “Your eyes are like emeralds surrounded by a blaze of fire.”
Her heart beat all the faster, and Catherine found she could not look anywhere but his face. His mouth was so close to her own, and for a moment, Catherine realized she had a strong urge to kiss him.
It was too much.
“I am feeling a little wobbly after all,” she said quickly, stepping out of his embrace. “Might you take me home? I think a cup of refreshing tea would do me the world of good.”
A strange little smile crossed his face as he held out his arm to her, as though he knew she was trying to run from her own feelings. They walked back towards the carriages, still doing their slow circle of the park in search of their carriage whilst Catherine found that, all of a sudden, she was quite desperate to get home.
Chapter Fifteen
“And so the final banns are to be read come the morrow!” Lady Hewson exclaimed as she sat down heavily in a chair opposite Catherine, who was trying her best to continue with her embroidery.
“Yes, Mama,” Catherine said. What was it her mother wished to say about it? Catherine knew she would not make such a comment without having something to say about it.
Her mother sighed heavily. “And are you quite sure, Catherine?”
“Yes, Mama,” Catherine repeated, shaking her head to herself. “You need not keep asking me.”
“I simply want to ensure you are prepared for this, my dear,” her mother replied, sounding quite frustrated. “I must admit that Lord Linton has shown himself to be somewhat worthy of late, but that does not mean he will remain so.”
Catherine smiled at her mother, aware that her exasperation came out of concern for Catherine’s wellbeing. “He has changed, has he not?” she mumbled to herself, thinking over the last two months. The banns had only been called a sennight ago, once all had been settled, and Catherine had only one last opportunity to break off her engagement, should she wish it. She was due to be married in five days’ time, the Thursday after the final banns were called. It was to be a very quiet affair, but that was just as Catherine wanted it.
What had surprised Catherine lately was to realize that Linton was becoming quite the gentleman. He had called on her almost every day since their engagement had been announced, and Catherine had grown more and more eager to spend time in his company. She had not mentioned her growing feelings to either her mother or Alice, finding them most confusing and quite unexpected.
When Linton smiled at her, her heart seemed to stop for the briefest of moments. When he called her ‘Kitty’ in that affectionate way of his, it spread warmth all through her, even though he had called her that name for almost as long as she had known him.
She did not even consider Lord Kerr, nor did she feel any kind of hurt over what he had done. Linton’s actions did not cut deeply any longer, and she found herself strangely grateful towards him, as though she was glad that she was to marry him. He no longer had any rumors chasing after him, given that he had sorted out a variety of substantial monetary amends to each one—and that was on top of the debt he had paid on behalf of Lord Kerr! He was not clinging to his wealth but rather doing good with it, as though he wished to keep his future with Catherine a bright one.
She no longer worried in the least that he would go back to his former ways, and instead, she saw him as a strong, astute gentleman who would do anything he could to make her happy. How much she appreciated that! How much he had done for her. Catherine could not help but feel gratitude and, she had to admit, a slow burning affection for the man she had once been determined to avoid entirely.
“Catherine?”
Glancing up at her mother, Catherine realized she had become lost in thought. “Yes, Mama?”
Lady Hewson closed her eyes and shook her head. “Do not tell me you have fallen for the man, Catherine! Too often I have caught you with your head in the clouds these last few weeks!”
The laugh died in Catherine’s throat. “Love?” she croaked as a burst of heat climbed its way up her spine. “I am not that foolish, Mama.”
“I should hope not!” her mother exclaimed, tossing her head. “Lord Linton has shown he can change, yes, but that does not mean that the change will be long standing.”
“Well, I have Father’s contract in place, if the worst should happen,” Catherine reminded Lady Hewson. “Please, Mama, you are driving me mad with your constant worrying. I trust Lin
ton. We shall be happy together, I promise you.”
Her mother sighed heavily. “I shall miss you, my dear,” she said, a little more gently. “Once you are wed, there will be no need for us to remain in town.”
Catherine swallowed the lump in her throat. She was close to her mother and had never truly considered what being apart from her would be like.
“I suppose you shall live here, given that Linton enjoys the town life so much, whilst we return to the country,” her mother continued woefully.
“I presume so,” Catherine murmured, trying not to think of it. “Life will be very different after I am married. That is to be expected, I suppose.”
Lady Hewson huffed and muttered under her breath for a few minutes more, but then she was interrupted by a knock at the door.
“Are you expecting someone, Catherine?”
“No, I do not think so,” Catherine answered, setting her embroidery aside. Once they were both sitting properly, her mother called the butler to enter, only for Lord Linton to stride in ahead of the butler, his gaze fixed on Catherine.
Her breath caught as he bowed, his eyes never leaving her face. Catherine smiled as she got to her feet, her heart swelling with happiness as he kissed her hand gently.
“My dear, Kitty.” He smiled after he had greeted her mother. “The wedding is only a few short days away, and I have come to see that all is in order.”
“Of course all is in order!” Lady Hewson exclaimed, her eyes flashing. “Do you not think us capable of organizing a wedding?”
Catherine hid a smile as Linton bowed heavily, his expression a mixture of surprise and embarrassment.
“I never doubted you for a moment, my lady,” he said, attempting to appease her. “What I meant to say—and you will have to forgive me for being so ineloquent—is that I wanted to see if there was anything I might help you with.” He flashed a smile, which Catherine knew was an attempt to mollify her mother. “After all, this is to be my wedding, too, and I cannot help but feel excited at the prospect of marrying your daughter.”