by Desiree Holt
She frowned. “The JAG colonel?”
“Right. Anyway, he and his wife are having a little informal gathering at their place and Nat and I think you should drop in.”
Anticipation coursed through her, until she remembered this was a different party, different state, different city, different people. The last time she’d allowed herself to be talked into a party she’d spent the most incredible night of her life, one she still had erotic dreams about. She had never dreamed sex could be that great or that hot or that off the charts. Too bad Sam—if that had even been his real name—had disappeared off the face of the earth.
Now, with the fearful twist her life had taken two years ago, she stayed away from events like this. Or, in fact, any events at all.
“I can’t imagine he’d be happy with you inviting guests to his party.”
Kip laughed. “As a matter of fact, after he met you and learned you were new to town, he suggested I pass along the invite.”
“Oh. Well.” She shuffled a few more papers. “Um, thanks, Kip, but I think I’m just going to go home, soak in a tub and drink wine.”
“The glamorous life of a prosecutor,” he joked. “Right?”
She managed a little smile. “If the public only knew.”
“Okay, I’m playing my trump card. Natalie’s worried about you, says you keep to yourself too much. And when Nat’s worried, I try to make that go away.”
Kari stared at him. “She’s worried about me? She barely knows me.”
“Listen.” He shook his head. “I swear my wife has psychic powers. The last visit to my office she told me, Kip, that woman needs taking care of. Take care of her.”
Kari couldn’t help herself. She burst out laughing. “She definitely has your number.”
“No kidding.” His face sobered. “Listen, Kari. I know where you’re coming from. I know what chased you to San Antonio and I promised Ross I’d keep an eye on you. Which I’m doing. I wouldn’t urge you to venture out anyplace I didn’t think was safe for you. This is a private party, everyone’s vetted and there’s nothing to worry about. Natalie and I will be there so you always have backup.” He gave her a reassuring wink. “So can you do us both a favor and say yes?”
She chewed her lip, trying to figure out how to do this without offending Kip, who was a great boss and a great guy. And someone who had gone out of his way to keep her situation private while providing her a secure work environment, and to make her feel welcome. But go to a party? She thought she deserved a medal for going to work every day.
“You don’t have to stay long,” he added in a soft voice. “But I do think it would do you some good to see something besides this office, the courthouse and your apartment.”
The last thing in the world she wanted to do was go to a party with people she didn’t know. On the other hand, what could be safer than being with a prosecuting attorney and a JAG officer? Okay, she owed Kip something. She could manage a half hour or so to satisfy him. What could it hurt?
“Okay.” She swallowed. “I’ll go. Give me the address and I’ll plug it into my GPS.”
“Great.” Relief washed over his face. He took a business card from his shirt pocket and handed it to her. “On the chance I could get you to say yes I wrote everything down for you. You’ve got my cell number if you need it.”
She stuck the card in the pocket of her skirt. “What time is this shindig, anyway?”
“Seven o’clock.” He glanced at his watch. “It’s five-thirty now. Does that give you enough time to do whatever you need to before then?”
“Yes. Of course.” Time to shower and change into fresh clothes. Wash off the burdens of the day.
Find some courage.
“Good. See you there.” He started to leave then turned back. “I think you’ll have a good time, Kari. And you’ll met some new people, expand your horizons beyond this office.”
She didn’t want to tell him she needed to keep her horizons as narrow as possible. The narrower the safer. San Antonio had been a clean start for her. At least she hoped so. But only if she was very cautious, very careful and wasn’t very visible beyond the courtroom.
What a hell of a way to live.
Signing off on her computer, she then closed everything down, gathered her purse and took the elevator down to the parking garage. She always made sure to ride with others. Her parking space was near the elevator so in minutes she slipped into it and was heading out of the garage.
Driving to her apartment she had second and third and even fourth thoughts about doing this.
For the past two years she’d lived a very compartmentalized life, first in Chicago then here in San Antonio. Before the move her social life had disintegrated to zero, but even then he’d found ways to torment her. More and more ways.
At first she’d thought someone had been playing a joke on her. Maybe one of the other attorneys who’d teased her about her lack of a social life. She hadn’t dated much at that point and had lost interest in parties and Friday night happy hours.
How did you compete with a dream?
So she’d figured one of the wise-asses had decided to have a little fun. First a card had arrived, taped to her front door, professing great admiration and affection. It had been unsigned except for the drawing of a heart. Then a flower had appeared on her desk at the end of a hectic trial. One flower. A peony. No card. No one had known where it had come from. At least that’s what they’d all said. She’d looked up its meaning, hoping that would point her in the right direction. Romance and an omen of good fortune. Anyone could have sent her congratulations. But romance?
Next had come a gardenia. One of the legal assistants had told her it meant secret love. That had given her an uneasy feeling. Who the hell had been in love with her? She’d barely dated anymore, measuring every man against the memory of a phantom. Then a cactus flower had been delivered and she’d freaked out when she’d discovered it meant lust. The whole thing hadn’t been funny to her any longer, so she’d gone to Ross Delahunt. He’d tried to find out where the flowers had come from, but none of the florists remembered who’d ordered them. Only that they’d been paid for in cash.
Kari had kept hoping it would stop. Anyway, flowers were just harmless, right? Until the hang-up calls had started on both her landline at home and her cell phone. Until she’d gotten the feeling someone had been watching her. Following her. Until computer-generated notes had begun appearing in her mailbox, notes that left no question what had been in the mind of the writer.
Until someone had broken into her condo while she’d been at work, placed all her lingerie carefully on her bed then, as evidenced by the imprint, lain down on top of it. The police had found no trace of whoever it had been. Of course. Her stalker had developed stealth into an art form. Her nerves had been raw and she’d found it increasingly difficult to concentrate on her cases.
She’d had an alarm system installed, but somehow her follower had managed to bypass it one night. When she’d awoken to a shadowy figure in her bedroom, just standing there, obviously watching her, she’d lost it, screaming her head off. That must have startled him, because he’d fled at once. But that had been the end for Kari.
Ross had taken it all very seriously. The first thing they’d thought of was someone she had successfully prosecuted who might now be free and carrying a grudge. He’d had one of his admins check the whereabouts of everyone on that list, but they’d all still been in prison. Anyway, to her this hadn’t felt like someone out to hurt her. More like someone who was secretly obsessed with her. But why hadn’t he come out of the closet, so to speak? Why not approach her in a normal manner?
“Because unfortunately,” Ross had said, “he’s got a twisted mind. He might be a high-profile person who for a number of reasons can’t approach you in person. Or maybe he’s married and this is the only way he can act on his feelings for you.”
“Great,” she’d groaned. “So I’m going to be his secret obsession forever? Ross, I don
’t know how much more of this I can take.”
“It has to be someone with easy access to the offices,” he’d commented. “Someone whose appearance wouldn’t be cause for alarm.”
“But that could be dozens of people,” she’d protested.
They’d checked all the attorneys who had appeared against her, but that had seemed to be a dead end too. Ross had his top investigator interview them and these were men who could read people. They’d told him there was nothing to find. Not even a twitch from any of them.
When she’d finally hit the breaking point, she was more than grateful to him for reaching out to his contacts and finding her this position here. No announcement had been made in Chicago, no farewell parties, nothing. No fanfare at all. She’d managed to slip out of her job and the city unnoticed without, she hoped, a trace. She just wondered how much longer she’d have to live like this.
“He’s off the grid, Kari,” Ross had told her last time she’d asked. “Everyone’s got feelers out for him but you know how good he is at being invisible.”
Yes, she did. Even when he’d tormented her, he’d been like a wraith in the night.
“We don’t even know what the hell he looks like,” she’d protested.
“Tell me about it.” Her boss’s voice had been filled with frustration. “That’s the damndest part of it.”
“He’s like a ghost,” she’d told him. “How does he leave all these things and no one sees him? Get to my house? Find my information without anyone knowing it?”
“You and I both know that devious people can accomplish devious things. I can at least tell you no one out of the ordinary seems to be nosing around to find you and for damn sure none of us are telling anyone where you went.”
“But what if it’s someone who wouldn’t raise any red flags? Someone so commonplace no one thinks of him for this?”
“Then we need to examine all your options and decide what’s best for you.”
Hence the move to San Antonio.
Shake it off. It’s been months. He’s probably given up by this time.
If only.
Making a conscious effort to redirect her thoughts, her mind wandered to the upcoming evening. She’d never been much for parties—oh, wait, Kip had said gathering—even before her life had imploded. The one she’d attended five years ago had given her the most memorable night of her life. Too bad she’d run like a scared little girl, not willing to mess up her career plans. Look where that had gotten her—chased out of Chicago by a relentless stalker and wondering every day since then if she’d ever again see the man who still lived in her dreams.
The image of her incredible lover had never left her. He had a tall, muscular, lean body…a warrior’s body. Thick hair the color of melted chocolate and hazel eyes with flecks of brown in them. A square-jawed angular face with high cheekbones and a tan that she somehow didn’t think came from hanging out at a beach. The image of him was like a photograph permanently etched on her brain cells. The instant they’d touched, something powerful had passed between them. Every time she thought of him since then her breasts had ached, her nipples tightened and the walls of her pussy thrummed with need. How was that possible after just one night five long years ago?
Because he is so much more than any man I met before or since.
What would he say if he knew her situation? Of course, she’d never have a chance to find out. She’d managed to deep-six that possibility. The chances she’d ever find him again were less than slim to none, but she did wonder if he ever thought of her the way she thought about him.
Stop it, Kari. Enough already.
* * * *
“I’m always impressed with the size of this place.” Beau reined in his mount next to Slade’s. “I can see why you like coming home to it.”
They’d stopped at the little creek running by a stand of trees. Teo had packed thick sandwiches and ice-cold beer for them in their saddlebags and Slade figured they needed the break right about now. He took a moment to draw in a deep breath, relishing the blend of grass and hay and horseflesh and yes, even sweat.
“Thanks, Big Boss.” Trey swung down from his saddle and stood there rubbing his ass. “I think I’ll need a cushion to sit down after this.”
“Maybe your ass needs toughening up,” Beau teased.
Trey flipped him off and everyone laughed.
Lunch was a leisurely meal, just relaxing by the water. There wasn’t even a lot of discussion. Slade talked about the ranch, how they moved the cattle around, what he hoped to do with it once he left Delta Force. They shot the breeze and bullshitted until all the food and drink were gone. Then they headed back to the ranch to give themselves time to clean up before driving into the city.
“You’re really into this, aren’t you,” Beau commented as they slowed their horses. “I see it every time we come here.”
“Working on the ranch or even just riding always helps clear out my mind,” Slade answered Beau. “No matter how dark it is inside my brain and soul after some of our missions, a few hours on horseback seems to let in the sunshine.”
“You’re right.” Beau inhaled the scent-laden air and let his breath out slowly. “I ought to take you up on your invitation to visit more often. This place is great.”
“You know you’re welcome any time, buddy.”
“So tell me about the party tonight. Dinner? No dinner? Large group? Small?”
“From what Paul said, a buffet dinner, casual, and I’m guessing about thirty people. They’ve got a large home in Alamo Heights with a big yard and plenty of room for people to mingle.”
Marc drew up next to them. “And what if I don’t feel like mingling? I’m considering not going at all.”
Slade studied the man, the tight lines of his face and the darkness in his eyes. He could just as easily tell him to stay home, but Marc needed someone to yank him back from the abyss he was teetering on the edge of.
“If I have to give an order as your commanding officer,” he told him, “I will. I know what you’ve been dealing with is soul-sucking, but I won’t let you destroy yourself over it. If you do, your ex-wife wins, and I’m not about to let that happen. So no, you won’t be staying home tonight.”
“Are you sure there’ll be women there tonight?” Trey joked.
“Yes, but they may be a little too high-class for you.” Slade edged his horse closer. “And you’ll need to shower first.”
“Seriously. Are we allowed to troll the population if there are single women? We’ll behave, big brother. Word of honor.” Trey crossed his heart.
“If I had a brain, I’d leave you guys at home. But tonight you’ll start learning how to act civilized again.”
They unsaddled and stabled their horses then walked up to the house.
Slade knew the women the Huttons invited would be nice, attractive, intelligent. That was their circle of friends. But the one he wanted wouldn’t be there. He’d had a long, dry stretch as far as women were concerned, what with all the back-to-back missions. In some of the foreign cities where they’d been, he’d tried to find someone who could excite him. It never worked. Despite their experience and sexual expertise, they’d left him wanting. He’d finally stopped searching, instead spending the nights in his hotel rooms dreaming about a woman he’d never have. His fantasies were so real, so erotic, he often woke up gripping his cock, working it until he finally found some relief.
Sometimes he actually regretted the trip he’d taken to Chicago. Oh, he’d been happy to see his friends again. He didn’t get to Chicago often enough. The party they’d taken him to had been a great way to relieve the stress of his job as a Delta Force Team Leader. And the woman. Yes, the damn woman. The electricity that had sizzled between them the moment they’d bumped into each other at the bar had been enough to light up all Chicago.
He didn’t remember exactly how it had happened but one minute they’d been jammed into a crowd and the next they’d been in a darkened hotel room, having the most
incredible and inventive sex of his entire life. He could still see the teasing smile on her face, the sparkle in her eyes, the silken fall of her hair that later in the dark had curtained the two of them as she’d ridden him to completion.
The things they’d said to each other, done to each other, their exploration of each other’s bodies had taken him to a plateau he’d never reached before. And they’d talked. Oh, not about their real lives, but about things they enjoyed, things they loved to do, things that were both funny and sad. He’d never realized how just whispering to someone in the dark could be so erotic.
The next morning when he’d woken up, she’d been gone. If there hadn’t been lingering traces of her perfume on the sheets and his body, he might have convinced himself he’d imagined the whole thing. What good did it do to meet a woman you connected with so suddenly and so intensely if you never saw her again? One would think with his mental discipline he could just have put her out of his mind and move on, but no amount of effort on his part had made that happen.
He’d dreamed about her more nights than he could count, always waking up with his cock so hard that his only relief came from his good right hand.
He swallowed a sigh. Maybe tonight he could go in with a different attitude and find someone who really excited him. Someone who could replace the phantom image that haunted him constantly. Lord knew he was definitely ready for it.
Chapter Three
Slade wondered how long he’d have to stick around the party. He didn’t want to be rude to his friends, but he realized he’d lost the party spirit somewhere along the way. He had to make sure his guys were taken care of, though. They knew no one here and he wasn’t sure how comfortable they’d feel with this crowd. They’d come in one vehicle although Teo was always on standby.
He spotted Beau Williams leaning against the living room wall, nursing his beer and people-watching. Slade moved over to stand next to him.
“Trolling the crowd?” he joked, knowing it was one of Beau’s favorite pastimes.