"I don't know. I just fell in love with my wife, and that led to my making her an offer," Viscount Milton answered, not very helpfully.
"Oh."
"Why do you ask Darcy?" asked Viscount Milton
"I'm not sure, just recently I've been feeling as if things are going to change, and also as if something is missing in my life, but I cannot put it into words, nor work out what it is," Darcy explained hesitantly. Rarely in the company of his close relations and his friends was he at a loss for words, but now as he tried to define what was in his mind, he found that he couldn't put it into words very well.
"Darcy, I do declare that you are feeling lonely!" laughed the Colonel. "Don't tell me that our Aunt will get her way and you will marry Anne after all."
"No!" Darcy cried, horrified by the thought. "I told you I will never marry Anne, although I might consider marrying if I found the right woman."
"This coming from you is a miracle! You always said that you weren't interested in having a wife!"
"I know! In my head, I never want a wife. They are far too expensive!" Darcy exclaimed.
"That wouldn't be a problem for you! You never spend even half of your income."
"Why should I? Women never seem to save anything! Money also appears to be the only thing that they are interested in – except for their dresses and fripperies. You know the girls here, in London, their conversation is nothing but fashions and hat pins, etc. I do declare that there is not a woman in England that is my intellectual equal. Nor is there one that could induce me into matrimony."
"That's not Georgiana, though," said the Colonel who shared in the guardianship of Georgiana with Darcy.
"No, but she does seem to take pleasure in such conversations. Conversations that you and I only wish we could give her."
"True. It's a shame that neither of us is married. We really cannot give Georgiana the female company she needs."
"So who are you thinking of then?" asked Mr Bingley.
"I'm not thinking of anyone in particular. It seems to me that I should look for a woman of good connections and a fortune to match my own," replied Darcy.
"Ah, could you love such a woman Darcy? I know you! You don't want a woman whose head is empty," the Viscount commented.
"Too true, too many women are said to be accomplished who really are not. I wish to find a wife who had a fortune, good connections and who is accomplished, but above all, I wish to find a woman whose mind is the equal of mine," stated Darcy.
"There are plenty of young ladies here who are single and unattached," offered Colonel Fitzwilliam.
"Children and or empty headed you mean," said Darcy contemptuously. "None of the young women I know would make me happy, and certainly they would not tempt me out of my bachelor life."
"I'm sure that statement would hurt all of them," answered Viscount Milton. "Georgiana is developing into a beautiful young woman, so are all her friends. Miss Bingley is not bad looking, and you know how much she likes you."
"Likes my fortune more like," sneered Darcy, Mr Bingley looked hurt. "Darcy, that's just typical of you. You are determined not to like anyone or anything," said Mr Bingley.
"It's not that Bingley, I just have very high standards and there are few people who match up to my standards."
"All the same you are determined not to be pleased – especially with women," said Bingley.
"Why should I not be? Expect to be disappointed then the rare gem is a pleasant surprise. I'm three years off being thirty and have yet to find a woman who is my equal. I don't want a woman who thinks only about money, fashion and getting a husband. I sometimes wonder if any of them actually know how to make a man happy." Darcy said.
"What do you mean, Darcy?" asked Mr Bingley.
"Well, it seems that the Mothers only teach their girls how to flirt, cover screens and net purses – how does that actually add to our happiness? How many of them know how to run a household, control servants, mend shirts or make skirts? How many of them know anything about our daily business – or would be able to run our estates if we were to die? None of the women I've ever met. Most of the girls don't even read, let alone know anything about the war in France or the current political situation. Oh, there's gossip about a girl who gets in trouble or if a wife leaves her husband. Girls know that quickly enough, and they gossip about it amongst themselves, unless it is in their own family. However when was the last time you heard a girl actually ask for example how much stocks were worth in one of the mills or what the annual interest on savings was? All they know is that we have X amount of pounds a year, but I am not aware of the last time I heard a girl asking about how we got our X pounds a year or what business it is that we deal with to keep them in hat pins and lace. I doubt that there's any woman out there who really knows accurately how to interest me."
"Wow, Darcy! That is heavy stuff you want from the women. Most fathers keep that sort of thing from their daughters." said Viscount Milton.
"So, in other words, we are destined to a life of unequal partnership or loneliness because our wives cannot understand the burden that rests on our shoulders. Or are you saying that they shouldn't understand it?"
"No, not at all, you see although my wife is actually a girl like you describe the average girl, she is capable of understanding and actually does help me out a lot, although I still like to shield her and my daughters as they grow up from the full extent of everything."
"Surely though a woman should be equal to her husband in every way?"
"Perhaps so, but until society changes, it will never truly be," said Viscount Milton.
"Society, I hate society! An endless round of nothingness repeated day after day, week after week, year after year." Darcy suddenly wished that he had the job of a servant rather than being in a position where half of his time was spent idle, it not being thought proper for a gentleman to work and his business in town and at Pemberley not even taking half of his day. A brief discussion on the benefits of the lives of the servant and master ensued which very quickly became so uncomfortable that the men decided to go join the ladies. Darcy's feeling of something missing persisted throughout the evening and the days that followed.
Chapter 4
No man is an island, entire of itself, Every man is piece of the continent, A part of the main. - John Donn
15th June 1811
The celebrations for Bingley’s birthday continued well into the night, and it wasn’t until 2 AM that Darcy was finally free to retire to his bed. However, sleep was still very far from him, so again he mulled over why he was feeling as if something was missing. This led him down the path thinking about his childhood companion George Wickham, who was almost two months younger than Darcy.
31st October 1788
Darcy stood outside the door to his parents' shared sitting room at Pemberley. He was about to knock when he heard his mother’s voice. “George, I really am concerned that our son is spending too much time in the company of the steward's boy.”
George Darcy’s gratitude to his steward Wilberforce Wickham was such that George Darcy accepted the office as young George Wickham’s godfather. Mr Darcy also insisted on providing the education for George Wickham to improve his family lot or be capable of taking over from his father when the time came for Mr Wickham to retire.
“Anne, I don’t see the harm of allowing two young boys who are of the same age playing together. Besides its good, for Will to be able to socialise with those whose condition in life is beneath him” George replied.
“I am not complaining of that George, but rather that by educating and giving young Wickham the same privileges as our dearest boy, you are giving him expectations above his station. There’s something about young Wickham that doesn’t feel right to me.”
“I know, my dear. There’s a risk in this, but young Wickham seems fine. He is such a sweet, well-mannered boy, and I owe his father so much more than I can ever repay. I find it hard to refuse the boy anything he asks. As for the educati
on, I believe that if given a good education the boy will have the best chance to make something of his life. Goodness knows that Wilberforce and Mary can barely keep the bread on their table with her drinking the blue ruin as she does!”
“I know that George, but as they get older the difference in the boy's positions will become more dramatic. William will have to have the respect and love of not just the servants here, but in town, not to mention the tenants. Wickham won’t have that. He won't even have any money he can call his own. I worry that by allowing the boys so much freedom together now we are doing them both a disservice. I worry that Wickham will learn to resent what Fitzwilliam will have – even covet it. It’s not right to raise a servant’s boy this way. I believe it would be better if he had the basic church schooling that the vicar provides those servants who need to learn to read and write.”
“Hush, Anne. I believe it will all be all right. I believe we are doing our best to give back to Wilberforce in kind.” Darcy didn’t hear any more of the conversation between his parents as he ran back to the nursery before he was missed.
30th April 1793
Darcy, his father and George Wickham had walked together into Lambton. George had taken the boys for two reasons. The first was that he wanted to buy a copy of William Blake’s Songs of Experience. The other reason was that the boys were due to start Eton in September and George Darcy wanted them to become comfortable outside of Pemberley.
The bookshop in Lambton was a quaint, quiet shop that was nestled next to the village green which was always welcoming whenever he visited with his father. Today, however, the bookshop felt almost festive as the two boys walked in with Mr Darcy. Young Stevens greeted the trio as they walked through the door. “Welcome Mr Darcy, Master Fitzwilliam”. Darcy looked at his father expects him to prompt Mr Stevens into greeting George Wickham also, but it was as if George Wickham was invisible.
“Good morning, Stevens. Have you had William Blake's new book arrive yet?”
“Indeed we have Mr Darcy, sir. It arrived just this morning.”
“Perfect. I think I’ll just have a browse and see what other new offerings you have.” With that, George Darcy waved the two boys off as he perused the various volumes on the shelves.
“Perhaps sir, young Master Fitzwilliam would appreciate a piece of young Miss Madeline’s wedding cake?” At this George Darcy cocked his eyebrow, He had not been aware there was a wedding breakfast taking place. “Oh forgive me, sir, it all happened quite quickly. The proprietor, Mr Kincaid's daughter, was married this morning in Lambton Church. She married a young man by the name of Gardiner, an importer from London. Miss Madeline Kincaid is now Mrs Edward Gardiner, and I just thought your boy might appreciate a bit of the wedding cake. Please forgive my presumption.”
“No presumption at all, Stevens” George Darcy turned to Fitzwilliam and said, “What about it Fitzwilliam, a piece of wedding cake?”
“Y-y-y-y-yes p-p-p-please, sir” Fitzwilliam stuttered.
“Just one moment, please” Stevens disappeared out the back, and a few seconds later he appeared with a slice of the moistest lemon drizzle cake Darcy had ever tasted. All the while this took place George Wickham could do nothing more than looking on enviously as Fitzwilliam was given attention and he was ignored. Shortly after this, the trio left the bookshop, and they visited the bakery, the confectionery shop and a few other shops including the milliners. However, the treatment of George Wickham as invisible continued everywhere the trio went. George Darcy did not do anything to make life easier for the two boys as he knew that at Eton the two boys would have similar treatment.
As they exited the milliner's Darcy senior took the two boys to visit the village green, but George Wickham wanted nothing more than to go home. So as Darcy senior took them to see the ducks, Wickham did the only thing he could think of to get them to go home. Standing there with a bag of breadcrumbs in his hands he tried to make his face take on a look of surprise as a wet patch suddenly appeared at the front of his breeches, he then proceeded to cry as the piss ran down his legs. Darcy senior did not look happy, but herded the boys along and walked them directly home. Wickham had gotten what he wanted and, walking behind the two Darcys, smirked all the way back – until his mother saw the state of his breeches.
1st September 1793
Darcy stood in his father's study, hesitantly. Rarely had he been in his father’s study when he wasn’t in trouble. However today his father had called him there. “Y-You c-called for me, father.”
“Yes, Will. Come sit here on the sofa by me.” His father said, gently. Darcy quickly crossed the room and sat on the comfortable sofa next to his father. Despite how rare this time was he loved the times when he and his father would sit quietly in the study together.
“Will I have something to ask of you. It will not be easy, but I want you to be a credit to the Darcy family.”
“Anything father,” Darcy answered solemnly.
“Will, as you know you are going to inherit Pemberley and all of its responsibilities. Part of those responsibilities is to look after those who are dependent on us, our servants and tenants. You know this. Tomorrow you and young Wickham will start school at Eton. Your situations are very different. What did you learn when we went into Lambton in April?”
“That visit was so strange. George and I are playmates at Pemberley, but all through that visit nobody even acknowledged George. Why Papa? I didn’t understand.” Darcy still could not figure out what made him so different from Wickham.
“Will, Wickham was not acknowledged because he was with you and me. You see Will, Wickham’s situation in life is different to yours. He is a dependent of ours. It’s called the order of precedence and society. In society, gentlemen are ranked above the servants. Wickham is the son of our steward and therefore a servant and in our employ. When servants accompany the master or mistress, the servant is expected to make themselves as invisible as possible. Had Wickham been with his father he would have been acknowledged, but being with us, those who serve us are expected only to deal with those beneath us when we indicate it should be so. Wickham also couldn’t understand that.”
“So we are more important than them?”
“No. it is just that we have a lot more influence than them, and people will always court our good opinion because of that. Anyway, tomorrow I want you to start doing your job as master of Pemberley. I need you to look after Wickham. There will be some boys who will tell young Wickham that he doesn’t belong at Eton because his father is only our steward. Some will be cruel to him, and others will deliberately try to pull him into doing bad things. Those things will be a big temptation for him as he seeks to be accepted. I want you to look after him, Will. I have given you both an allowance. His allowance will be much smaller than yours. I also have an emergency fund set up for you to look after Wickham. All you need to do is write to our solicitor in London if you need it. Now, Will, do you think you can do this for me?”
“Y-y-y-yeeeesssss” I will try not to fail you, father. How can I look after him? I can’t even talk to others.
The rest of that day Darcy remembered sitting in his father’s study drinking hot chocolate and reading his father’s books.
2nd September 1793
The Darcys and young George Wickham set out from London at 7 AM and arrived in Eton shortly before midday. Upon arrival, George Wickham was immediately taken to his new rooms. Darcy, however, stayed with his mother as his father chatted with the headmaster. “Now Will, you be good and write to your dear mama frequently,” his mother instructed him.
“Yes, Mama. I’m going to miss you” Darcy threw his arms around his mother’s waist and hugged her fiercely. He didn’t let go until his Father had finished with the headmaster and he was taken by the housemother to the room he would share with Wickham.
“You will both wash up now. Your learning starts in 30mins. I’ll bring you to your classrooms in 15mins” With that the house mother left the boys to clean up and change
from their travelling clothes. Both boys were, in fact, ready within ten minutes later so were sitting waiting for the Housemother to come back.
“Darcy, Wickham you will wait outside your door for the next few days once you are up and dressed” The Housemother scolded them. “You will be expected after a few days to get yourselves down to breakfast and back to your rooms in the evening. Darcy, there will be no preferential treatment here, you will learn independence and necessary life skills. Wickham as a stewards son you should already be independent. You boys will be fed and taught. Darcy your washing will be done on a daily basis, but you will be expected to polish your own boots. When you are older, you may hire your own valet and bring him. That is up to your family. Wickham, you will be expected to come to the kitchen with your washing once a week on a Saturday, where you will learn to take care of your clothes. You will both be among boys who of the peerage. You will all remain respectful of each other and the other boys at all times.”
The classroom they were lead to was a large room, with rows and rows of wooden desks. Several young boys were already seated. All the heads turned and watched as Darcy and Wickham took their seats at their assigned desks. Shock turned to amazement, which turned to laughter from the boys already seated. “Look out it’s the invasion of the servants!” yelled on of the boys.
“Leave alone Smith! There’s only one servant.” Another boy yelled.
“I’d rather it was a cit than a servant” Smith returned.
“Yeah, at least a cit has some manners.”
“No servant should be here at Eton! This is a school for Gentlemen.”
Doesn’t it count for anything that my Father is his Godfather? Wondered Darcy. I should say something I promised my Father I’d look after Wickham. What do I say?
1811-1812 How It All Began- Part 1 Page 2