by Rosie Clarke
‘I can look after Dad,’ Ben said stoutly. He’d watched in silence but now spoke out. ‘I can manage, Dad.’
‘Yes, I’m sure you can, lad,’ Robbie said. ‘I don’t think we need to trouble the doctor, Flo. I’m feelin’ a bit better now – but if you want ter stay, there’s a spare bed upstairs. You could both stay if yer want…’
‘Roy is comin’ round later,’ Honour said. ‘I’ll be there to meet him – but I’ll be all right on my own, Flo – if you want to stay here…’
‘We’ll see how Robbie is by teatime…’ Flo said and took the cup of tea Honour had made for her. The milk was out of a tin, because Robbie hadn’t any fresh in the house. ‘I’ll fetch some milk for us before then… we’ve got plenty of food at home… and I think the shop on the corner is open for a couple of hours. He won’t mind serving me anyway, even if he’s closed; I’m his favourite customer.’
‘Let me go,’ Honour said. ‘I’ll bring fresh bread – is there anythin’ else you need?’
‘Some ham for the kids or cheese. Which sort of sandwich do you want?’ Robbie looked at them. Ruthie wanted ham and Ben wanted cheese, so Robbie smiled at Honour. ‘There’s some money in the dresser drawer, get some of each please if he’ll serve you.’
‘He’ll serve us,’ Honour said and smiled at him. ‘If not, I can get a tin of pink salmon or something from home…’
Honour took four half crowns from the purse in the drawer, told them she would be back soon and let herself out of the front door. Ben told Ruthie to come upstairs with him, leaving Flo and Robbie together.
‘Oh, Robbie, when they told me you were missing I was so frightened,’ Flo said. ‘I couldn’t bear to lose you now…’
‘And I ain’t goin’ anywhere,’ he said and smiled at her. ‘I love you, Flo. I let yer down once, but it ain’t goin’ ter happen again. I’ve been thinkin’ – either we can move in with you and sell this place – or you can move in here, but we’ll get married as soon as we can arrange it… You will marry me, won’t you?’
‘Yes, I shall and we’ll live as a family,’ Flo agreed and knelt at his side, looking up at him with love in her eyes. ‘I’ve told Honour she’s yours and I want to be with you for the rest of my life, Robbie – and I don’t want to waste another moment…’ She shivered. ‘When I thought I’d lost you for a second time, I didn’t know how to bear it…’
He bent to kiss her softly and then gave a wry smile as his head reeled. ‘I can’t bend my head without goin’ dizzy yet, love, but I will soon – and then I’ll show you just how much I love you. We’ll be together for the rest of our lives.’
‘Yes…’ Flo smiled and kissed him softly. ‘I do love you so much.’
‘I want to be with you and the kids…’ Robbie sighed, ‘but I’m not promising it will be easy. The kids like you, but they still miss their mother and I’m going to have to wait for the right moment to tell them they have a big sister.’
‘Let Honour make friends with them,’ Flo said gently. ‘We’ll speak of us as a family and of her as their sister – and when they’re ready, you can explain to Ben and he’ll make it right with Ruthie.’
Robbie looked at her and nodded. ‘You know my son nearly as well as I do, Flo…’
‘He’s quite like his father,’ Flo said and smiled. ‘We all need to adjust slowly, but it will be better when we’re married and living together.’
‘Your money is yours to do with as you like,’ Robbie said. ‘If I had lots of it I’d probably want you to give up – but that would be selfish and I shall leave that decision to you.’
‘I don’t want to give up the shop just yet,’ Flo said. ‘Once you’re on your feet I probably could, but for now it will make things easier for us all – but I wonder if you’d consider letting Honour and Roy have the cottage. He was looking for a workshop with accommodation over the top but couldn’t find anythin’ with rooms over – but he can’t afford to buy a separate workshop and a home…’
‘They can rent the cottage cheaply for a while and then perhaps I’ll give it to Honour one day,’ Robbie said after a moment’s consideration. ‘I have to think of Ruthie and Ben too – but if I succeed with what I’m hopin’ to do, I’ll be able to provide an inheritance for them as well…’
‘That’s for the future,’ Flo said, ‘but if Roy feels he’d like to move in here, renting would suit them for a start…’
Robbie smiled at her. ‘If it makes her happy, they can have it for whatever they can afford,’ he said. ‘She’s my daughter and I’ve never done anythin’ for her. It’s the least I can do…’
‘Thank you,’ Flo said. ‘We must wait to marry until after Dad’s funeral, of course – but I don’t want to wait any longer…’
Robbie smiled and risked another kiss, even though it sent his head reeling. ‘Nor do I, my love… nor do I…’
27
Flo stayed at the cottage overnight because she was worried about Robbie, who was dizzy for most of the evening and needed to sit quietly in his chair. She fed the children, made tea for Robbie and sent Honour home to be there for Roy when he arrived. In the morning, when Honour came to visit, bringing bacon, eggs, milk and bread from the shop, Flo didn’t question her about what time her fiancé had gone home the previous evening. Her daughter’s eyes were shining and she was happy and that was all that mattered to Flo.
Robbie was much better by the morning, but Flo persuaded him to go to the doctor’s surgery. He seemed more cheerful when he came back and told her that on his way from the doctor’s he’d called into the Sally Army headquarters and explained why he hadn’t been there for his appointment to view the properties in need of renovation.
‘We’ve made another appointment for the morning,’ he told Flo. ‘If I get that job too, I’ll be earning a decent wage and when word gets round I should start to get more work comin’ in…’
‘Don’t overdo things just yet,’ Flo said, but knew she was wasting her breath because Robbie was feeling much better and full of enthusiasm for their future.
Roy was invited to dinner at Flo’s later that week so that he could meet Robbie and it was decided that Roy would rent the cottage from his future father-in-law until he was in a position to either move into somewhere else or to buy it himself. He and Honour wanted a spring wedding and would move into their new home a few months before Roy was demobbed from the army and began his business venture.
Flo’s father was buried in early January and both Robbie and Roy helped to bear his coffin into church. Flo was surprised at how many local folk turned out to say goodbye to him. They’d decided to have the reception at Robbie’s cottage, because Flo had no parlour. The room was filled with guests who came to say farewell to her father – including Millie and Bert Waters, who were both much better and able to get about again with a little help from their friends and neighbours.
The pace of life had slowed a little for Flo now. It felt strange not to have to run after her father all the time, but instead she had Ben and Ruthie in for cake and tea and she’d begun to care for their clothes and do the things that a mother usually does, knowing that soon they would all be living together.
With Robbie’s permission, Ben kept on with his odd jobs for Arnie, but his father had made it clear there was to be no running to the bookies or anything illegal. He also helped Fred Giles at the fish and chip shop, and Ruthie spent as much time as she could with her granny, reading about the fairies and looking much happier than she had since her mummy died. Although the depression was still hard, everyone seemed to feel that it must soon get better, and as the weeks passed, Flo discovered that a lot of new customers were coming in to buy her home-made sweets. Both kids seemed to have accepted that Flo and Honour would now be a part of their lives and seemed happy enough to call her Flo, as their father did. She hoped that one day they might call her Mum but she would never ask: it would have to come from them.
*
In America things were changing. Roosevelt had
defeated President Herbert Hoover in the Presidential election in the previous November of 1932 and would become the 32nd President later that year. He’d promised the Americans he would boost spending on railways, roads, electric power and farms to get their economy back on track; he would in the meantime introduce unemployment benefit for all to alleviate their suffering. The news made English people hopeful that perhaps their government might do the same.
In Germany, a man called Hitler was also voted in on a landslide to become the Chancellor of Germany; he’d promised an end to the poverty and despair for his people too and it was hoped that these things would mean the beginning of a new future for all.
In mid-January Robbie received a visit from John Hansen one evening at the cottage. He came to tell him some vaguely disturbing news.
‘I spoke to the police concerning Mick – the lad you told me about. They seemed to know that some people had been using those abandoned houses down by Dock Road and yesterday they went round to investigate… There was no sign of either Mick or his father,’ John said. ‘However, the police found a body – no attempt had been made to hide it. They said the man had been stabbed in the neck and face several times and must have bled to death…’
‘Good grief!’ Robbie was shocked. ‘Do they know who it was?’
‘They believe it to be a man who came to the area only in the past six months or so… Some people called him Scrapper… and from the description I was given, I believe it might be the man who stole from the mission. You stopped him taking the children’s money on Christmas Day. He had been dead for some time when the police found him…’
Robbie shook his head but said nothing. He remembered Taffy saying that if Scrapper laid a hand on Mick again he would kill him, but he didn’t know what had gone on after Mick and his father had left his cottage that day. They had saved his life by carrying him into their shelter from the icy streets, and he wouldn’t be giving the police any clues to the murder of a man who had been both a bully and a thief.
‘I dare say there are quite a few rough types using those derelict buildings; anyone could have done it…’ he offered.
‘Yes, I imagine so,’ John agreed. ‘The police constable said as much to me. I think they put it down to thieves falling out… They found a great many empty whisky bottles and some stolen goods in the buildings…’
Robbie nodded. ‘Hopefully, it will mean an end to break-ins at the mission and the Sally Army…’
‘Yes, that may be the one bright thing to come out of this…’ John was thoughtful. ‘I thought I would tell you. I’m not sure whether to tell Miss Hawkins or not… I do not wish to upset her. She’s had enough troubles with her father dying and then you were attacked…’
‘I’ll tell Flo,’ Robbie said. ‘Thank you for lettin’ me know, John. I’ve stripped out the rotten wood, so I’ll be startin’ work on your roof rebuild tomorrow mornin’ when the struts are delivered and then we’re nearly done.’
‘I shall be glad to see it done and get rid of the tarpaulins and the safety props.’ John replied, then hesitated. ‘Ah, there’s the other thing that made me call; I believe congratulations are in order. Miss Hawkins is a lovely person. I know you will be very happy.’
‘I love Flo and we ought to have married years ago,’ Robbie said. ‘Her father sent me packin’, but in the end he regretted what he’d done… and now we’re goin’ to marry…’
John nodded, his face half turned away. Robbie didn’t notice the little nerve flicking at the corner of his eye, but then, John Hansen knew how to hide his feelings. Only Nurse Mary would notice the grief it had caused him to hear of Flo Hawkins’ coming wedding. She would offer him comfort in the only way she knew as his friend, working side by side with him to help the poor. She was a decent woman and John knew that if he wished to marry, Nurse Mary would always be by his side. For the moment his heart must heal, because he had truly loved Flo Hawkins, but he knew now that she would never be his. As for his constant friend and helper, their future lives remained to be seen. The signs that the worst of the recession might be beginning to ease a little, at least in some parts of the country, were hopeful, but it would be a long time before places like his mission were no longer needed. John thought that if the poverty here became less extreme he might consider taking a mission abroad – and perhaps Nurse Mary would also find that a good life, but that was for the future…
*
Flo had meant what she said about not waiting any longer than necessary and they arranged the wedding for the final week of January.
‘I don’t mind using Dad’s things,’ she’d told Robbie when they discussed what to do for the best. ‘He would hate to think I’d just thrown everythin’ out and I don’t see the need for it.’
However, she’d had to clear her father’s clothes from his large wardrobe. She packed them all into an old tin trunk and Robbie wheeled it round to the Sally Army in his barrow. In times like these a lot of men would be glad of the good things and the older stuff would go for pennies to the rag-and-bone man and be used for a good cause.
‘I’m sure Dad would say it was the best thing to do,’ she told Honour as they sorted through his possessions. ‘He didn’t like waste and it would be a waste to put his clothes up in the attic and let the moths have them – that coat and his best suit were hardly worn…’
In a locked box on the top shelf of the wardrobe, Flo found the deeds to the shop, which her mother had left to her in accordance with her grandfather’s will, also a gold watch and chain, some one hundred gold coins, and five hundred pounds in notes: the money she’d given him each month from her takings for years. She doubted he’d spent a penny, just putting it all away in his box each month. There was also a letter addressed to Flo:
Everything is for you, Flo. I’m sorry I wasn’t always the father I meant to be, but you and your mother hurt me, shutting me out and treating me as if I was a fool. I hope you’ll find happiness in the future and the money I’ve saved will come in useful.
He’d signed it but there were no expressions of love and she thought perhaps it had been written before he’d forgiven her and started to make amends. She stared at the letter for several minutes, before putting it back in the box. The gold watch and chain she would give to Robbie, and she would share the gold sovereigns with Honour; the money would stay in the box at the top of the wardrobe until it was needed.
*
It was the morning of Flo’s wedding. She rose to a dull and dreary view from her window, but nothing could dim the golden shine of her happiness as she remembered that this was the day all the dreams of a young girl were about to come true. She’d waited so long, but as Honour brought her breakfast in bed and told her that some gorgeous flowers had arrived, she jumped out and embraced her daughter.
‘I’m so happy, my darling. I hope you will be just as happy on your wedding day…’
‘I’m happy now,’ Honour said and kissed her. ‘Sometimes, Roy might seem a little careless, even thoughtless – but I know he loves me and he’s the one I love.’
‘Then I know you would never marry anyone else…’ Flo said and kissed her. ‘There was only ever one man for me and I’ve had to wait for a long time, but at last it has all come right.’
Honour nodded, looking thoughtful. ‘I’ve decided to work in the shop with you until Roy has his business up and running, even when we’re married – and by then you’ll have found someone else to help you.’
‘Thank you, darling; that is very thoughtful of you.’
‘You’ve done so much for me, Mum, it’s the least I can do…’ She said and kissed her. ‘I do love you very much…’
The sun managed to break through for a few minutes as Flo walked into church, looking young and pretty in her best pale blue frock and hat. Honour and a giggling Ruthie walked behind with their own little posy of flowers and Ben stood proudly with his dad. He’d been given the ring to keep safe and kept patting his jacket pocket to make sure it was there. Flo’s
friends had gathered to see her wed and she was aware of the smiles and happy faces all around her as she and Robbie left the church together as man and wife, standing for a few moments in the cool wind for some photographs taken by John Hansen, who was there with Nurse Mary looking happy and very smart in a blue tailored costume and hat.
Afterwards, they had a simple reception at the cottage, all the food having been prepared by the bride and her daughter. Flo noticed one or two odd looks when Honour called her Mum but ignored them; she felt no need to explain and neither did her daughter.
Honour stayed on after the others had gone, clearing the used plates and washing up, with Ben and Ruthie helping her. Ruthie already followed Honour everywhere and Flo felt warm contentment as she watched her family laughing and chatting together. Ben wanted Honour to show him how to make the sweets she produced for the shop, though Ruthie was just happy to eat them.
After the guests had gone and the clearing up was done, the children went back to the rooms over the shop, quite willing to stay with Honour for the night, leaving Flo and Robbie alone in the cottage. They had accepted her as a big sister without complicated explanations, perhaps because Honour had decided to call Robbie Pa. Ben thought it was funny, but it brought them all closer and he’d called Flo Ma a couple of times. Ruthie hadn’t yet, but she would come round to it in time because she always followed Ben’s lead. Flo had always loved them and was content just to see their smiling faces.
When they were alone, Robbie told Flo that Honour had asked him to give her away on her wedding day, which was set for May. ‘Of course I said yes – but it should’ve been you…’
‘No, you’re her father and I’m glad she asked you.’ Flo smiled lovingly at him. ‘I wasn’t sure she would accept it, but she has – and I know the children love her.’
‘Yes, they do. It surprised me how easily Ruthie took to her…’
‘Well they are sisters…’ Flo said and then put her arms about him. ‘It was a lovely wedding… thank you for my beautiful flowers…’