“Is there a problem?” she asked him.
“Of course not.” But his voice was as tense as his features. “I just… need time to process.”
“You realize how suspicious you sound, right?” Grizel asked as Lord Cassius reached under his cape, fumbling with his sleeve. “Especially with how pale you’ve gotten?”
“Suspect whatever you want. I’m sure you’re all very used to being wrong about me.” He pulled out a pathfinder and spun the crystal back and forth. “And I need to go.”
“Go where?” Sophie asked.
“It doesn’t concern you.”
“We’ll decide that,” Sandor told him.
But Lord Cassius locked the crystal into place and leaped away without another word.
Fitz glanced at Sophie. “So… that was super weird, right?”
Sophie nodded, wishing she’d thought to shove her way into Lord Cassius’s mind before he’d left. They deserved answers way more than he deserved privacy.
“You don’t think he’d try to protect Lady Gisela, do you?” Fitz asked.
“I was just wondering the same thing,” she admitted. “But… I feel like the only person he cares about is himself.”
“True. Though, what if protecting her also protects some embarrassing secret he doesn’t want anyone to know?” Fitz suggested—which definitely sounded like something Lord Cassius would do.
Sophie sighed. “We need to figure out where he went. I don’t suppose you saw which facet he used on his pathfinder?”
“You can’t really tell by looking at them. It’s about counting the turns of the crystal and feeling the cuts and angles.” Fitz dragged a hand through his hair. “I guess Grizel and I can go wait at the Shores of Solace and confront him as soon as he gets back.”
“That’s assuming he actually goes home. He might not.” She tugged her eyelashes a little harder than she needed to. “Ugh, why does everything have to be so hard? Like… is it really asking so much for people to be honest about what they’re doing? Even if they’re doing something wrong, at least own it, you know?”
“That would definitely make life easier.” Fitz kicked the side of his boot a few times. “Though… that sounds a little funny coming from you, since… you know… you still haven’t said why you’re here right now.”
He had a point.
And Sophie was absolutely not in the mood to get into another huge fight—especially since it had felt like some of the awkwardness between them was finally fading.
But…
Lying did make everything way more complicated.
Plus… how could they ever be friends again if she kept hiding things from him?
“Okay,” she said, taking a deep breath. “If you really want to know… Oralie and I unlocked the Forgotten Secret in her cache—and we didn’t really learn much from the memory. But it seemed like the information we need is actually in Kenric’s cache. So I’m trying to get that back.”
“And you think it’s here in Candleshade?” Fitz asked.
“No, I wish.” She fought the urge to tug out another itchy eyelash before she added, “We don’t know where to look. So we thought it might be good to see if any members of the Neverseen have any information that they’d be willing to share.”
She stopped there, clinging to the tiny hope that Fitz might not be able to guess the rest of her plan.
But of course he immediately said, “So… you came here looking for Alvar.”
Sophie forced herself to nod. “Well… mostly I’m looking for anything he might’ve left behind that could tell me where he’s hiding.”
She focused on her feet, bracing for a whole lot of shouting.
But when Fitz finally spoke, his voice was calm and steady—maybe even a little sad as he said, “And you didn’t ask me for help.”
“I—”
“It’s okay,” he interrupted. “I’m not mad. I just… wish I knew why.” He blew out a breath before he added, “Was it because of all the awful stuff I said when you told me you let Alvar go? Or was it because of… the other thing?”
Grizel coughed. “You know, I think it’s high time we do another grounds patrol, don’t you?”
“I do,” Flori agreed.
“I’ll keep watch here,” Sandor told them—then let out a squeaky yelp. “Or… I’ll be right outside the main door.”
Fitz cleared his throat when they were alone. “Goblins aren’t great at being subtle, are they?”
“Definitely not,” Sophie agreed, wondering if her cheeks were as red as the sash on her tunic. “Though… they’re better than ogres.”
“Very true. Ro’s the worst.”
“She can be,” Sophie admitted. “But in her own way, she can be kind of sweet.”
“I guess.” Several painful seconds passed before Fitz added, “You didn’t answer my question.”
Sophie cringed. “Caught that, huh?”
“It’s pretty hard to miss. Just like all of this awkwardness.”
Sophie dared a quick peek at his face and was stunned that he didn’t look angry.
He looked… sad.
Also ridiculously handsome—but that wasn’t something she needed to be thinking about.
That would only bring up the almosts and the what-ifs, and make her start wishing for things that wouldn’t be a good idea.
Fitz took a small step closer. “I really miss you, Sophie. Not just as… whatever. I hate how it feels like we’re not even friends anymore.”
“I know,” she whispered, trying not to wonder if any of that meant he still…
Because it didn’t matter.
She’d been the one to end things.
It had all gotten so complicated—and things were still complicated.
None of that had changed.
But she did need him to know, “I miss you, too.”
That earned her his glorious, movie-worthy smile.
He took another step closer, running a hand that looked a little shaky through his hair before he said, “Do you think we can maybe just… start over? Forget everything else and just try working together again?”
Sophie’s brain was screaming, YES!
But when she actually used her voice, she found herself asking, “Are you going to get mad at me about Alvar again?”
His smile faded, and he turned away, curling and uncurling his hands for several deep breaths.
“Anything with my brother is always going to be hard for me,” he eventually admitted. “But… I’m going to try to keep my anger directed at him, and no one else.”
It wasn’t the most reassuring answer.
But it did feel real—and wasn’t that what they’d been striving for during all of their Cognate training?
Truth.
Trust.
Open communication.
“Okay,” she whispered. “Let’s try it.”
He turned back, flashing another beautiful smile—though it was back to being a bit more reserved.
But that felt real, too.
So did the fact that neither of them reached for the other’s hand.
They still had a long way to go—a lot of healing and figuring things out.
But it felt like a good beginning.
“So… how do you want to do this?” Sophie asked, trying to get back to the more urgent problems they were facing. “We’d cover more ground if we split up and searched by ourselves, but—”
“Okay, don’t get mad at me for saying this,” Fitz interrupted. “But… I think this is a waste of time.”
“I know,” Sophie admitted. “I’m sure it’s going to be too. But… it’s still better than doing nothing, right?”
“See, but I think we have another option.” He stepped closer, lowering his voice to a whisper. “You want to talk to someone from the Neverseen, right? What about Glimmer? I’m sure she’d know way more than my brother.”
“I actually suggested that,” Sophie told him. “But Oralie seemed pretty convinced that
Glimmer doesn’t know anything—just like Keefe didn’t know anything when he left the Neverseen. And neither did Tam.”
“Yeah, but Keefe and Tam weren’t trusted members of the order,” Fitz reminded her. “The Neverseen knew Keefe was trying to play them, just like they knew Tam was basically a prisoner. But Lady Gisela thought Glimmer was super loyal, didn’t she? Do you really think she didn’t tell Glimmer anything? And isn’t talking to her better than spending hours searching this depressing, dusty house for something we both know we’re not going to find?”
Sophie sighed. “Yeah, I guess. Do you think we should go now? I don’t have a crystal to go to Tiergan’s house—and I’ve never been there, so I can’t picture it well enough to teleport.”
“Candleshade has a Leapmaster we could use. But honestly? I think we should wait until tomorrow. Don’t take this the wrong way, but you look super exhausted. Did you sleep at all last night?”
“Not really.”
“That’s what I figured. So why don’t you go home, get some sleep, and we’ll go to Tiergan’s house in the morning? Actually, it’d probably also be good to let Tam know we’re coming, since I hear he’s been a little… protective.”
“But—”
“It’s not wasting time,” Fitz interrupted. “I know it feels like it is, but seriously, Sophie. You’ve barely slept at all in days. And I know you’re probably thinking that you’re just going to toss and turn or have nightmares, but that doesn’t mean you don’t need to try to rest. Plus…”
“What?” Sophie asked when he didn’t continue.
He dragged a hand through his hair. “Well… I think I know something that might help you sleep—and no, I don’t mean taking a sedative. I mean… Keefe.”
Sophie straightened up, crossing her arms. “What about him?”
“Come on, Sophie. I saw the look on your face when he agreed to Councillor Alina’s demand, and then you leaped out of the Healing Center as fast as you could. And I get it—it was pretty harsh of him to do that. Especially after you spent all that time sitting by his side in the Healing Center, waiting for him to wake up.” He cleared his throat. “But… that’s why I think you might feel better if you guys talked it out.”
“Yeah… well… he doesn’t want to talk to me.”
“Not with his voice,” Fitz agreed. “But you could use your telepathy.”
Sophie crossed her arms tighter, basically hugging herself.
She’d actually thought about doing that the night before. But she wasn’t sure if Keefe would respond. And the thought of him ignoring her…
“He told me to stay away,” she mumbled, focusing on her feet.
Fitz sighed. “I know. But he was afraid he might lose control of his new ability. It’ll be way different if you use your telepathy. Trust me—I’m his best friend. I know these things. Plus, I saw the look on his face after you left, so I’m sure he’d feel better if you talked everything through. He’s probably been waiting for you to reach out, since you guys talk that way a lot.”
“No we don’t,” Sophie argued, not sure why her voice had gotten so high-pitched. “Seriously, we don’t.”
“Well, even if that’s true, you guys are… close.”
“We’re friends,” Sophie clarified, cringing when her voice turned squeaky again.
The conversation was just so… awkward.
“I know you are,” Fitz told her. “That’s not what I’m saying. I just… I know you’re super worried about him. And I know you’re probably thinking he’s mad at you or something. And the only way your brain is going to quiet down enough to let you sleep is if you talk to Keefe. So just… try it, okay? You’re going to need the rest. I have a feeling meeting with Glimmer tomorrow is going to be pretty intense.”
He was right, of course.
Sophie knew that.
But that didn’t make the idea any less… scary.
“It’ll be okay,” Fitz promised. “Trust me.”
She met his eyes, remembering all the times she’d done exactly that. Fitz had been her first friend—her first guide—in this scary, shimmering new world she’d had to figure out how to belong to. The person she’d called for help after her kidnapping, who’d shown up just in time to save her. Someone she’d survived fires and battles and banishment with, and who’d faced down cold, cruel monsters with her over and over and over.
“Okay,” she whispered. “But we meet up early tomorrow.”
“Deal,” Fitz agreed. “I’ll head to Havenfield as soon as you’re awake.”
Sophie stalled a little longer before she leaped back to Havenfield—then stalled a whole lot more once she got there, not sure she was ready to find out if Keefe would ignore her.
But outside, under Calla’s Panakes, with Wynn and Luna snuggled against her, she finally found the courage to stretch out her mind.
Keefe?
She was only going to try three times—that was the deal she’d made with herself. Three times, and if he didn’t answer, then… that was that.
KEEFE?
She pushed the call as far as it could go, holding her breath.
Still no answer.
One more time, she told herself. One more time, then count to five.
She rallied her mental strength. KEEFE!
One second passed.
Two.
Three.
And before she got to four, a familiar voice flooded her mind.
Has anyone told you you’re starting to sound like Silveny?
Sophie let out a breath. Hey, Keefe.
- EIGHT - KEEFE
Soooooooooooo, Keefe thought, mentally dragging out the word, I guess this means you’re still talking to me.
Funny, Sophie transmitted, I was about to say the same thing to you.
Keefe winced.
“What’s wrong?” Ro asked. “Need me to get Elwin?”
He shook his head.
Ro leaned closer. “Then why do you look all sweaty and nervous?”
Keefe shrugged.
Ro gritted her teeth. “If you don’t start talking soon, I’m going to tie you up in your blankets and use you for tackling practice.”
He shrugged again, earning a growl that rattled the walls.
Are you still there? Sophie transmitted in a soft, worried tone that made Keefe imagine her tugging on her eyelashes.
Yeah, sorry. Ro was distracting me.
He smirked at his bodyguard as he sat up and tried to fix his hair—then wanted to smack himself since it wasn’t like Sophie could see him. And it was a good thing she couldn’t, because wow—he didn’t realize his hair could bend that many different directions at the same time.
He was also pretty sure the tingling in his cheek was from big, red pillow creases.
He’d tunneled under his blankets after Dex left, and he’d been there ever since, tossing and turning and flailing and thrashing and generally feeling sorry for himself.
Elwin had brought him dinner at some point—something he called Cosmic Explosion, with all kinds of weird, colorful fruits cut into stars and moons and planets and suns. It even had sparkly silver dust sprinkled on top. And it tasted as amazing as it looked, but Keefe had only been able to choke down a few bites before his insides knotted up.
So… how are you doing? Sophie asked.
Oh… you know.
He wanted to tell her he was great—convince her that things were already going back to normal.
But then she might want to visit.
I’ve been better, he said, flopping back onto his pillow. He pulled his blankets over his head before he added the words he didn’t even like admitting to himself. I think this ability is getting stronger. I almost used a command on Dex today. Twice.
Several seconds crawled by before Sophie asked, But you didn’t, right?
Yeah, I fought it off. But it was a STRUGGLE.
What was the command?
I’m not sure. I couldn’t let myself acknowledge the word, because I
knew if I did, I’d HAVE to say it.
More painful silence. Then Sophie told him, Well… that sounds like good news.
Keefe snorted a laugh. You’re cute when you try to be optimistic, Foster. But we both know if I were there, I’d be seeing that little crinkle you get between your eyebrows when you’re worried. You’re reaching up to smooth it right now, aren’t you?
Actually, I’m rolling my eyes. You don’t have to get rid of the power, Keefe—you just have to learn how to control it. And that’s what you did today, right?
Keefe couldn’t bring himself to agree.
He wasn’t ready to feel optimistic—not when his throat hurt from the words he’d choked back, and his stomach hurt from all the failed medicines, and his head hurt from the constant emotional overload, and his heart hurt worse than anything.
At least he could do something about the last one.
I haven’t said I’m sorry yet, have I? he asked quietly.
No, Sophie admitted. But you don’t—
Yes, I do. He pulled his blankets tighter around himself, into a Cocoon of Shame. I’m really sorry, Sophie. I didn’t mean to make it seem like I don’t want to be around you, or like I think any of this is your fault. I definitely don’t.
Endless silence followed.
When Sophie finally responded, the thought was barely a whisper. It kinda seems like you do. I mean… you hung out with Dex—
I wouldn’t call it “hanging out,” he corrected. It was more like he lectured me and I fought the urge to use some creepy command on him. And he was only here because I’m hoping he might be able to make me a gadget like those fingernail things Tinker made for you—but, you know, for my voice.
Ohhhhh, that’s an awesome idea! She sounded so sweetly hopeful when she added, Does Dex think he can make something?
He wasn’t sure. But he’s going to try. And I guess Elwin and Kesler are working on some elixirs that might help too.
He decided not to mention the whole ability restrictor option, since he had a feeling Sophie would hate that idea even more than Dex did—and he wouldn’t blame her.
Plus, he was trying to apologize.
So… are we okay? he asked carefully. Or do I need to do some begging? I will. I’ll even write an apology poem if I have to. I just need to figure out what rhymes with “total jerkface.”
Unlocked 8.5 (Keeper of the Lost Cities) Page 37