“Have I scared you off yet?” Ian smiled. For the first time, I noticed a dimple in his cheek. It was hard to see since his beard covered it.
I laughed. “Not yet, but you still have twenty-nine days to do that.”
“I bet you’ll be looking for a home to purchase before the month’s up.”
His dancing blue eyes held mine. A current of something passed between us. It hit me like an electric shock.
I quickly stepped back, my demeanor sobering. “I should go.”
His eyes dimmed, but he covered it up with a grin. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
My ride pulled up. Already it was completely dark out while a fierce wind blew hair around my face. I pushed it back and nodded stiffly. “Yes. See you then.”
“I’ll look forward to it.”
I felt his gaze linger on me as I walked to the car. Trying to ignore the strange chemistry that had erupted between us, I slipped into the backseat. Davin’s bright blue eyes and broad shoulders filled my mind. I closed my eyes and chewed on my lip.
4 – PHONE CALL
The rest of the week passed in a blur. There was so much to learn, and as each day passed, I still wasn’t entirely sure I wanted to do this. While I was flattered that Cate had such confidence in me, I wasn’t sure I was cut out to be a Director. I’d always been a behind-the-scenes kind of person.
I functioned well in my lab, alone with my samples and theories. The managerial role, that Cate made look so easy, was anything but. Her job required people skills I could only hope to master and a confidence that I struggled to portray.
It wasn’t surprising. When it came to science, I knew my place. It was a world I understood. But when it came to running a company full of faces that looked to me for guidance and support, I felt like a fish out of water.
By the time Friday afternoon rolled around, I picked up the phone and called Amy. Not only did I need the distraction, since I hadn’t heard from Sharon yet, but I also needed advice.
She answered readily. “Hey, Meg. How’s it going?”
I sighed. “It’s weird. I’m sure you’ve heard by now that I’m in Seattle and not with Dr. Hutchinson on the east coast?”
“Yep, the news has spread like wildfire. Rumor has it that you’re going to be the next Director there. But we already knew that, didn’t we?”
I slumped back in Cate’s giant office chair. “Amy, I’m not cut out for this. Really, I’m not.”
“So you don’t want the job?”
I groaned and as I did, the answer came to me like a flash of lightning. Suddenly, everything was clear.
“No, I don’t.” I hadn’t wanted to admit that to myself, since I’ve been trying so hard to find my way out here, but if I was honest, it wasn’t for me. “But I don’t know what to do.”
Amy bit into something. Crunchy chews followed. “That’s easy. Just tell them you don’t want the job and come back here.”
I sighed heavily. “If only it was that easy.”
“It is. Just tell them no.”
Amy always had a way of making everything so simple. I pictured Ian, his eager face and grins every morning when he saw me. I could already imagine his disappointment when I told him I was leaving.
But then Cate’s words haunted me. Sixteen times the number of votes.
“Say, Meg?” Another crunch sounded from Amy’s side. “A package of blood samples showed up for you in the lab this morning. Is this that package you wanted me to run tests on?”
My heart rate sped up. My weekly package from Dr. Roberts had arrived. “That’s the one.”
“Um… okaaaay…” Another loud crunch followed. “So can I ask what this is about?”
I grimaced. I’d been waiting for the questions. Amy had been distracted when I’d told her about the weekly packages that would come addressed to me. Now, from the sounds of it, she wasn’t distracted anymore.
I ran an agitated hand through my hair. “Would you mind screening those samples for drugs without asking why?”
Her crunches stopped. “A drug screen? What drugs would I be screening for?”
I rattled off the numerous classes of drugs I tested the samples for each week.
“That’s quite the list. And I can’t ask what this is all about?”
“I’d prefer if you didn’t.” Nobody knew about my deal with Dr. Roberts. I knew if Amy, Mitch, or Charlie found out, they’d fly off the handle. But the situation was what it was. So far, Dr. Roberts had kept his end of the bargain. I needed to keep mine too, and starting more problems for him could potentially ruin the tentative truce we’d reached.
Amy sighed heavily. “Fine. I’ll run the tests. Want me to call you with the results?”
“Yes, please.”
We spoke for a few more minutes until a knock sounded on my door. Ian opened it without waiting for a response. He smiled when he saw me.
“Amy, I gotta go. Talk to you later?”
I hung up as Ian strolled into the room.
“Were you busy? Did I interrupt anything?” He wore jeans, a t-shirt, and a flannel shirt over that. One thing I’d observed, Washington’s Compound employees dressed just as casually as South Dakota’s.
“No, not busy. It was a personal call.”
He glanced at the clock. “It’s getting close to quitting time. Are you ready for tomorrow?”
I grimaced. “I’m never ready for that.”
My first speech at a rally in downtown Seattle was scheduled for tomorrow afternoon. The expected crowd was to be in the thousands. That was easily ten times the amount of people who had attended the rallies I’d done in South Dakota.
Sixteen times the number of votes. I bit my lip again at the thought of quitting this new position.
“I’ll join you so you won’t be alone.” Ian sat on the chair across from me. His broad shoulders extended past the seatback.
I cocked my head. “You don’t have to come. I can manage if you’d rather enjoy your weekend off.”
He shrugged. “I don’t have any plans.”
I glanced at Ian’s left hand. He didn’t wear a wedding ring, but he could have a girlfriend. A girlfriend who would want him home. “Are you sure I’m not infringing on…”
I didn’t know how to word it, yet from his raised eyebrows I knew he’d picked up on my question. My cheeks heated.
Ian grinned. His dimple showed again through his beard. “Honestly, Meghan. It’s fine. I don’t have any family obligations, and I don’t have a jealous wife or girlfriend who will question why I’m hanging out with you. Actually, I don’t have a girlfriend, so you really don’t need to worry.”
“Of course. Right. Okay.” I hastily looked away as my face no doubt resembled a tomato. “Um, if you’ll excuse me.” I busied myself with opening drawers in the desk. “I think I’m going to head home early tonight.”
Ian’s glanced at the clock. It was only 5 p.m. “Doesn’t your ride come at 7?”
I wanted to smack a hand to my forehead. Seriously, can I act like any more of an idiot? I rubbed my hands on my thighs. I hoped he didn’t see it. “Yes, that’s right. You do raise a minor, but good, point.”
He laughed. “How about I give you a ride home? By the time your driver arrives, I’ll have you at your doorstep.”
My shoulders sagged. Since it didn’t seem I was going to act any less embarrassing anytime soon, I figured I might as well take him up on his offer. Why stop humiliating myself now when I can continue it for an hour while trapped within his car?
“Sure, thanks.”
He chuckled again. The movement caused a lock of strawberry kissed blond hair to fall across his forehead. “I’ll get my coat. Be right back.”
After Ian left, I leaned back in my chair and tried to figure out what was wrong with me. I liked Ian, I did. And on some level I was attracted to him – there was no point denying that.
But it didn’t sit well with me. I hadn’t felt anything for any guy, apart from Davin, in years. But
Ian was good-looking, kind, and had been nothing but attentive and accommodating all week, yet…
My heart hurt at where my thoughts turned.
Ian wasn’t Davin.
He never would be.
I took a deep, shuddering breath. Sometimes I missed Davin so much it hurt. Like a vise had wrapped around my chest and squeezed so tight it felt like it would never let go.
I swiveled the chair around to gaze outside. Dusk had arrived. The moon hovered near the horizon. Clouds drifted in front of the glowing orb while the wild emerald forest grew darker in the night. I drew my knees up and wrapped my arms around them while trying to get my thoughts and emotions in order.
Davin and Ian couldn’t be more opposite. Davin was the most stubborn, resilient, intensely proud man I had ever met. He’d been beaten down by the Compound time and time again, yet he always stood back up. There was a ferocious strength to him that I’d never seen in anyone else.
Yet behind that rage-filled exterior, lay a kind, gentle, and fiercely protective man. I still remembered how he’d cared for me when I’d fallen sick after my Makanza exposure. He’d stayed by my side, day and night, nursing me through it. And the way he treated his mother, and encouraged me to mend the rift with my own parents, was a testament to how deep his loyalty lay. Family meant more to him than anything.
I’d never felt anything for another man that compared to what I felt for Davin. But it was more than that. Davin knew me inside and out. He knew how my anxiety at times controlled my life. He knew that only a year ago I’d pretended that my brother was still alive.
Jeremy had been the only person on this planet that I loved more than life itself, yet he’d died in the Second Wave. His death still affected me. It probably always would. But anytime that bone-deep gripping sadness threatened to consume me, Davin had been there. Holding my hand, coaxing me back to the surface, listening, always listening, to the pain I still felt.
Davin accepted me for who I was. He’d never tried to change me or make me into something society said I should be. He said I was just fine as I was.
I loved that about him.
A tear slipped onto my cheek. I felt the wet, rolling drop streak along my skin. I didn’t try to wipe it away. That was another thing Davin had taught me.
Don’t run from grief.
Accept it. Let it work its course.
I sat quietly for a moment, letting the aching void consume me. Jeremy was gone. It could be years until I saw Davin again.
I miss you. Both of you.
The door opened behind me. I blinked rapidly as I heard Ian step in. However, my movements weren’t fast enough.
Ian’s face fell when he saw me. “Meghan? What’s wrong?” He hurried around the desk and kneeled at my side, his eyes searching mine.
I shook my head and wiped the tears away. “Just remembering some things.”
His brow furrowed. With a hesitant movement, he placed his hand over mine.
I stiffened.
“Sorry.” He removed his hand and stood, clearing his throat. “Would you like a minute?”
“No, really, I’m fine.” I smiled. It was a small smile but a genuine one. I was still sad that Jeremy was gone, but I’d always be sad about that. And the pain I felt about Davin…
It was a pain that may someday end. If he were ever free.
Standing, I picked up my purse. “Should we go?”
Ian nodded and stuffed his hands in his pockets. I could tell that he was still unsure how to proceed after his attempts at comforting me failed.
Doing my best to put him at ease, I slipped my coat on. “What area of the city do you live in? I hope you’re not driving out of your way to give me a lift?”
“No, I’m about five miles from Cate’s house. It’s not far.”
An awkward moment passed between us. I could tell that Ian wanted to ask more about why I’d been crying but didn’t know if he should.
I draped my purse over my shoulder. “I was remembering my brother. He died in the Second Wave. That’s what the tears were from.” I didn’t mention Davin – that pain was too raw. If I spoke about him, I’d probably cry again.
Understanding dawned in Ian’s eyes. “Right. I have days like that too. I lost my sister, brother, and mom in the First Wave.”
My mouth fell. “I’m so sorry.”
Ian shrugged sadly. “We all lost someone. That’s how life is now.”
A part of me wanted to reach for him, to make contact like he’d tried to make with me, but when it came to touching people, I always balked. The Kinders were the only exception to that. With Sharon and Davin, touching was like breathing.
Ian shrugged his coat on and picked up my laptop bag before I could protest.
“So what time is the rally tomorrow?” My footsteps were quiet on the carpet.
“Starts at noon. I’ll pick you up at ten. That will give us plenty of time to find parking and get you set up to speak. Do you have a speech worked out?”
The elevator hummed as we descended to the main floor. “I have a speech memorized that I’ve given around fifty times. I’ll use that one. I’ve found it to be the most effective.”
Ian cocked his head as the elevator door’s opened and we stepped out. “I’ll be curious to hear it.”
“Bring your tissues.”
He chuckled. “A tear jerker?”
“I try to make it that way.” Dozens of MRI employees passed us as we walked to the private exit tunnel. “Emotions seem to have the highest impact on the audience. If they leave questioning the morality of what we’re doing on Reservation 1, and are thinking about what if the Kazzies were their family member trapped behind that barbed wire fence, then I’ve done my job. My hope is that after being inundated with what the Kazzies are experiencing time and time again, that sooner or later, the public will take action.”
Ian nodded as we reached the end of the tunnel. He lay his palm over the guard’s computer. It flashed green. “That seems like a good strategy.”
I did the same with my palm on the other guard’s computer. “That’s my hope, but it obviously hasn’t worked yet.”
Cool, moist wind blew across my cheeks when we stepped outside. I pulled my scarf up as we hurried across the parking lot.
My phone rang just as I slid into the passenger’s seat of Ian’s car. After a glance at the screen, I hurriedly tapped the answer button. “Sharon? Hi, how’s it going? Did you get in the reservation?”
“Oh, Meghan. I… it’s…” she sobbed.
My stomach dropped just as a horrible, awful feeling filled me – the feeling everyone gets when you know the rug is about to be swept out from under your feet.
I gripped my phone tighter. “What happened?”
“They’re… a kid…” Sharon took a deep, staggering breath. “Something’s going on in the reservation, and it’s not good!”
My heart rate sped up even more. “What do you mean?”
“I drove up this afternoon, but they wouldn’t let me in again, so I started driving around, trying to find some other way inside. I couldn’t, but I did meet someone, and he showed me–” Her voice caught.
I felt Ian watching me. He’d already started the car and was pulling us onto the highway. I barely noticed when the parking lot fell behind us.
I covered my other ear so nothing would distract me. “What did he show you, Sharon?”
“It was a video. It showed a woman, a Kazzie. She was flying over the reservation. She had wings, Meghan. Can you believe that? But she was flying and then they shot her down.”
My heart stopped. “They shot her?”
“Or something like that. She probably fell around thirty feet to the ground. I don’t know if it killed her or not.”
My voice became low and fierce. “Who showed you this video?”
“A local kid. He can’t be older than sixteen, but I guess he’s been sneaking to the outskirts of the reservation to watch things. He’s shot a few videos on his phone
. Some of those videos… what they show…” She sobbed again.
My mind raced with what she was implying. If what Sharon saw was actually happening and not some hoax, the Kazzies were still being abused. Monitoring Dr. Roberts hadn’t stopped it. He’d found a way around the president’s inside contacts.
It was worse than the rug being swept out from beneath me.
My worst fear was coming true.
“Meghan, what do we do?” Sharon pleaded desperately.
“Stay where you are.” My hands shook as I struggled to keep my voice calm. “Whatever you do, don’t lose that kid who has the videos. I’ll come to you. I’ll catch a plane tonight and fly back to South Dakota.”
“Okay, okay,” she said shakily. “I’ll stay here.”
My hands were shaking so violently by the time we hung up that I dropped my phone. It fell to the floor with a dull thud. Bending forward, I picked it up.
Ian remained quiet, his gaze on me as we sped down the road.
“I… uh… I’m sorry, but I won’t be able to attend the rallies this weekend.” I carefully tucked my phone in my purse so I wouldn’t drop it again.
“I guessed as much from what I heard.”
“I’ll need to book a flight tonight. I have to go home.”
Ian’s hands gripped the steering wheel tightly. “I’ll come with you. I’ll call Cate to make sure she’s fine with it, but I already know what she’ll say.”
I tilted my head toward him. “Come with me? But what about running the Compounds?”
A flash of trees passed by the window. “The Compounds can run themselves for a few days. This sounds more important.” He merged onto a highway and accelerated toward Seattle. “Can I ask what happened?”
I glanced down and played with my fingers. I felt like such a fool now. Dr. Roberts had played me for a fool. He hadn’t drugged my Kazzies, but who knew what else he was doing to them. I should have known.
Actually, I had known something was wrong. Deep down, on some level, I knew he’d find a way around our deal. It would explain why those uneasy feelings and niggling doubts had never left me. Thinking Dr. Roberts would treat the Kazzies fairly had been naïve, wishful thinking on my part.
Section 12: Book #3 in The Makanza Series Page 4