by Jean M. Auel
"That's true," the Nineteenth said. "I remember that Denoda was quite… overwhelmed by Dalanar. It took her some time to get over him. He handled it well. He was tactful, considerate, but kept his distance. I was impressed."
"Always," Marthona said, almost under her breath, and finished in her thoughts, he always was entirely correct, did exactly the right thing.
The Nineteenth wasn't going to let it go. "Always what? Tactful? Considerate? Impressive?" she asked.
Marthona smiled. "All of them," she said.
"And Jondalar is the child of his hearth," the First said.
"Yes," Marthona said, "but there are differences. The boy doesn't have quite the tact of the man, but perhaps more heart."
"No matter what man's spirit started him, the child always has something of the mother, too," the Zelandoni Who Was First said.
Ayla listened carefully to the rather oblique conversation, especially after Jondalar was mentioned, and detected the mannerisms of voice and body that communicated even more than words. She understood that the Nineteenth's comment about Denoda was less than complimentary, and sensed that the older Zelandoni had been quite attracted to Dalanar. There was also an implication that Marthona's son had not shown the same refinement as her former mate – they all knew about his youthful indiscretions, of course. Marthona was aware of the old woman's feeling toward both of them, and let her know that she knew Dalanar better and wasn't quite as impressed with him.
The First told them that she also knew both men and suggested that Jondalar was just like Dalanar and had the same attractive qualities, not less. She also paid an implied compliment to Marthona because Dalanar's spirit and the Mother had chosen her to make the child of his hearth. Ayla was becoming aware that a woman who was chosen to have children by spirit of the man to whom she was mated was held in higher esteem. Marthona made it clear to the zelandonia, especially to the Zelandoni of the Nineteenth, that while her son might not have all of Dalanar's fine qualities, he had some that were better. The First not only agreed with her, but said that his better qualities came from his mother. It was obvious that the former leader and the Zelandoni of the Ninth Cave had a close personal relationship and great respect for each other.
There were subtleties within subtleties that added meaning to the sign language of the Clan, including the understanding of facial expressions and postures as well as gestures and even some words, but the language that employed every nuance of voice, tone, and inflection as well as facial expressions, unconscious postures, and ancillary gestures conveyed even more, if one could grasp it. Ayla was very familiar with the unconscious signals of body language and was learning how they were expressed by the Others, but she was also becoming more consciously aware of spoken words and the manner in which they were used.
"Can someone find Lanidar," Ayla said, "so I can ask him to find Jondalar?"
"No, you can't ask him, Ayla," Marthona said. "But I will," she looked at the zelandonia who were gathered in the lodge that had become the mating women's lodge, "if someone will go and look for him."
"Of course," the First said. She looked around to see who was available and signaled Mejera, now an acolyte of the Zelandoni of the Third Cave. She was with them when they had gone to search for Thonolan's elan in the Deep of Fountain Rocks. She had been with the Fourteenth Cave then, but unhappy there. Ayla recognized her and smiled.
"I have an errand for you," the First said. "Marthona will explain."
"Do you know the boy Lanidar of the Nineteenth Cave?" Marthona started. There was no nod of recognition. "He's the son of Mardena, her mother is Denoda." Mejera shook her head in negation.
"He can count about twelve years, but he looks younger," Ayla added, "and his right arm is deformed."
A smile of affirmation creased Mejera's face. "Yes, of course. He threw a spear at the demonstration."
"That's the one," Marthona said. "You need to find him, and when you do, tell him to find Jondalar and give him a message from me. Tell Lanidar to tell Jondalar that Ayla is concerned about the horses, and he needs to see to them before the Matrimonial tonight. Do you understand?"
"Wouldn't it be easier if I went and told Jondalar?" Mejera said.
"It would be far easier, but you have a role in the Matrimonial this evening, and therefore you cannot give a message to Jondalar until afterward, certainly not from Ayla, even through me. However, if you cannot find Lanidar, I understand it would be acceptable for you to tell anyone else who is not related to him to give him the message. Do you understand?"
"Yes, I'll do it. Don't worry about them, Ayla, I'll make sure he knows," Mejera said, then hurried out.
"I suppose the zelandonia would find something objectionable about Mejera talking to you about it, so I don't think we have to explain in detail," Marthona said. "And we don't have to mention the package you wanted to give him."
"I think we can refrain from mentioning anything," Ayla said.
"Now, it's time for you to start getting ready," Marthona said.
"But it's just past noon. It's a long time until nightfall," Ayla said. "It won't take that long to put on the tunic Nezzie made for me."
"There's more to it than that. We will all be going to The River so the women who are to be mated can bathe. They are even boiling water to purify it for the ritual. Not to mention, hot water is very nice for washing with. That's one of the nicest parts of the pre-mating rituals. Jondalar and the men will be doing the same thing, in a different place, of course," Marthona explained.
"I love hot water," Ayla said. "The Losadunai have a hot-water spring near their shelter. You can't imagine how wonderful it feels to bathe in it."
"Yes, I can. I took a trip north once or twice. Not far from the source of The River, there are pools of hot water in the ground," Marthona said.
"I think I know the place, or one like it. We stopped there on our way here," Ayla said. "There is one thing I wanted to ask. I meant to ask earlier, and I don't know if it's too late, but I was hoping to get my ears pierced. I have those two matched ambers that were given to me by Tulie, the headwoman of the Lion Camp, and I wanted to wear them, if I can find some way to hang them from my ears. That's how she said I should wear them."
"I think that can be arranged," the woman said. "I'm sure one of the zelandonia will be happy to do it for you."
"What do you think, Folara, this way? Or this way?" Mejera said as she held a section of Ayla's hair in her hand and showed the young woman two alternatives. Folara had joined them when they returned to the zelandonia lodge, after their cleansing rituals. Though many lamps had been lit, it was still much darker inside than out in the bright sun, and Ayla wished she were out rather than sitting there while someone did things with her hair.
"I like the first way better," Folara said.
"Mejera, why don't you finish telling us where you finally found them," Marthona said. It was obvious that Ayla was uncomfortable. She was not used to having someone fixing her hair, and the young acolyte seemed quite adept at talking while she was working. Marthona thought it might distract her.
"Well, as I was saying, I asked everyone. No one seemed to know where either one of them was. Finally someone at your camp, I think it was the mate of one of Joharran's close friends, Solaban or Rushemar, the one who has a baby. She was making a basket…"
"That's Rushemar's mate, Salova," Marthona said.
"She said that one or the other might be with the horses, so I followed the creek upstream and that's where I found both of them. Lanidar said his mother told him that you would be with the women all day, Ayla, so he decided he should check on the horses, like you asked. And Jondalar said the same thing, more or less. He knew you'd be with the women in seclusion all day and decided to see how the horses were doing. He found Lanidar there and was showing him how to use that spear-thrower thing," Mejera explained.
"It turned out that I wasn't the only one who was looking for Jondalar. Joharran came a little later. He looked a littl
e angry, or maybe just irritated. He'd been looking all over for Jondalar, to tell him that he was supposed to go to The River for his ritual purification with the rest of the men. Jondalar told me to tell you that the horses are fine, and that you were right, Wolf may have found a mate or a friend. He saw them together."
"Thank you, Mejera, it relieves my mind to know that Whinney and Racer are all right. I can't tell you how much I appreciate all your time and effort to find Lanidar and Jondalar," Ayla said.
She was glad to know that the horses were fine, and pleased that Lanidar had seen to them on his own. She normally would have expected it of Jondalar, but he was going to be mated, too, after all, and she had just wanted to make sure that he hadn't been distracted, or prevented, from checking on them. But she was a little worried about Wolf. Part of her wanted him to find a mate and be happy, but another part dreaded the thought of losing him, and she was concerned for him.
Wolf never lived with other wolves, she had probably spent more time around them when she was teaching herself to hunt than he ever did. She knew that while wolves were extremely loyal to their own pack, they defended their territory against other wolves fiercely. If Wolf had found a female lone wolf, or a low-ranked female from a nearby pack, and decided to live like a wolf, he would have to fight to make a territory of his own. While Wolf was a strong, healthy animal, bigger than most wolves, he hadn't been raised in a pack where he play-fought with siblings from the time he was a puppy. He wasn't used to fighting wolves.
"Thank you, Mejera. Ayla looks very nice. I didn't know you were so skilled at arranging hair," Marthona said.
Ayla reached up with both hands and gingerly felt her hair, gently touching the rolls and other shapes into which it had been coaxed and pinned. She had seen some of the other young women with what she was sure were similar arrangements, so she had some idea of how it looked.
"Let me get a reflector, so you can see it," Mejera said.
The dim image in the reflector showed a young woman with her hair fixed in a way that was similar to that of most of the other young women in the lodge. It just wasn't anyone she recognized as herself. She wasn't even sure Jondalar would.
"Let's put the matched ambers in your ears," Folara said. "You should start getting dressed."
The acolyte who had pierced Ayla's ears had left a sliver of bone through each of the holes. She had also wrapped some sinew around the front and back and both sides of the ambers and left loops that attached to the bones that pierced the lower fleshy part of her ears. Mejera helped Folara to attach the ambers to Ayla's ears.
Then Ayla put on her special mating outfit. Mejera was dazzled. "I have never seen anything like that," she breathed.
And Folara was delighted. "Ayla, that is so beautiful, and so unusual. Everyone is going to want one like it. Where did you get it?"
"I brought it with me. Nezzie made it for me. She's the mate of the headman of the Lion Camp. This is how it should be worn for the ceremony," Ayla explained as she opened the front to expose her breasts, even fuller now with her advancing pregnancy, then retied the sash. "Nezzie said a Mamutoi woman should proudly display her breasts when she is mated. Now I want to put on the necklace you gave me, Marthona."
"There is a problem with that, Ayla," Marthona said. "The necklace would look beautiful with the big piece of amber nestled between your breasts, but not with that leather pouch that you wear around your neck. The necklace won't show. I know it means something to you, but I think you should remove it."
"She's right, Ayla," Folara said.
"Let me show you in the reflector," Mejera said. She held up the piece of sanded, blackened, and oiled wood so Ayla could see.
It was the same strange woman that she had seen before, but this time Ayla saw the ambers dangling from her ears, and her worn amulet bag, lumpy with the objects it contained, hanging from a frayed cord.
"What is that pouch?" Mejera asked. "It looks full of things."
"It's my amulet, and the objects inside are all gifts from my totem, the Spirit of the Cave Lion. Most of them confirmed important decisions in my life. It holds my life spirit, too, in a sense."
"It's something like an elandon, then," Marthona said.
"The Mog-ur told me that if I ever lose my amulet, I will die," Ayla said. She grasped her amulet and felt the familiar lumps and bulges, and a kaleidoscope of memories of her life with the Clan rushed back.
"Then we need to keep it in a very special place," Marthona said. "Perhaps near a donii so the Mother can watch over it. But you don't have a donii, do you? Usually a woman gets one at her First Rites. I don't suppose you ever had a ceremony like that?"
"Well, yes, in fact I did. Jondalar taught me the Mother's Gift of Pleasure, and the first time, he made a ceremony of it and gave me a donii figure that he made himself. I have it in my backpack," Ayla said.
"Well, I suspect if anyone could make a proper First Rites ceremony for you, he could. He's had enough experience at it," Marthona said. "Why don't you let me take care of that amulet for you now, and when you and Jondalar leave to begin your trial period, I'll give it back to you so you can take it with you." The woman saw Ayla hesitate, then finally nod her head in agreement, but when she started to slip the leather bag off over her head, the leather cord got caught up in her new hairstyle.
"That's all right, Ayla. I can fix it," Mejera said.
Ayla held the familiar leather bag in her hand, reluctant to give it up. They were right, it didn't look good with her Matrimonial finery, but she hadn't been without it since Iza gave it to her, not long after she was found by the Clan. It had been a part of her for so long, it was hard to let it go. More than hard, she was afraid to let it go. It seemed the amulet itself had clung to her, grabbing at her hair when she took it off. Maybe her totem was trying to tell her something, maybe she shouldn't try to be only one of the Others on this day of her mating, with her Mamutoi clothes and her Zelandonii necklace. She had been hardly more than a woman of the Clan when she met Jondalar, maybe she ought to keep something of that time, too.
"Thank you, Mejera, but I think I've changed my mind. I'm going to wear my hair down and loose. Jondalar likes it that way," Ayla said. She held the amulet a moment longer, then handed it to Marthona. She let the woman fasten around her neck the necklace that had been given by Dalanar's mother and saved for her, before she started taking out the pins and ties that held her hair in the elegant Zelandonii style.
Mejera hated to see all her effort taken apart, but it was Ayla's choice, not hers. "Let me comb it for you," she said, acceding gracefully, which impressed Marthona. I think this young acolyte is going to be a fine Zelandoni someday, she thought.
When Jondalar and the rest of the men who were going to be mated started walking toward the zelandonia lodge near the foot of the slope where the ceremony was to be held, he suddenly felt nervous. He wasn't alone. The women had moved, leaving the big lodge empty. With the help of several of the zelandonia, the men arranged themselves in the order they had practiced, first according to the counting word of the Cave where they would live, and then by their rank within the Cave. Since all counting words were powerful – only the zelandonia knew the enigmatic differences among them – they did not designate rank, it was simply an ordering, a way to line up. The unnumbered and often unmentioned but perfectly understood ranking within the Cave was another story, although it wasn't hard and fast.
A person's status could change, and the position of many would, as a result of their upcoming matings. It was one of the many agreements that were negotiated prior to the ceremony. The rank of some would be higher, some lower than they had been before, because the status of the hearth was a combination of what both brought to the union, which also determined the status of any children. It was understood that the resulting hearth belonged to the man, but was tended by the woman; children that were born to the woman were also born to the hearth of the man. They and their families both wanted the status of the new hearth to be a
s high as possible for the sake of the children, and for the names and ties of those related to them, but a certain number of other Cave leaders and zelandonia had to agree. It could sometimes be a contentious negotiation.
Ayla hadn't been much involved in the negotiations for the status of her and Jondalar's new hearth, she wouldn't have understood the nuances anyway, but Marthona did. The oblique conversation that Marthona had had earlier with some of the zelandonia, including Zelandoni of the Nineteenth, that Ayla was beginning to understand, had been an element of those negotiations. The Nineteenth had been trying to use Jondalar's youthful indiscretions to bring down his status partly because Ayla had discovered the exceptional new cave within the territory of the Nineteenth Cave. The find had brought her status up considerably, even though she was foreign born, but it had embarrassed Zelandoni of the Nineteenth somewhat. If they had found the cave, they could have kept it private and limited who used it, giving them significant prestige. But the fact that it was found by a foreign woman during a Summer Meeting immediately opened it up to everyone, a point that was made clear by the First.
Jondalar's ranking was among the highest, with his mother as a former leader and his brother as the present leader of the largest Cave of the Zelandonii, not to mention his own contributions, some of which he brought back from his travels. Increased skill at flint-knapping, a complex talent that had to be attested to by respected and knowledgeable flint-knappers from other Caves, and the new, publicly demonstrated spear-thrower contributed, but determining Ayla's status had presented a problem. Foreigners always had the lowest status, which would normally bring the ranking of the new hearth down, but Marthona and several others were fighting it by claiming that her status among her own people was very high, and she had many attributes of her own. The animals were an ambiguous factor, with some saying they lowered her status and others saying they raised it. The ultimate ranking of the new hearth was still not fully resolved, though it did not prevent the mating. The Ninth Cave had accepted her, and that's where they would be living.