by Diana Palmer
“But I’ve done nothing wrong,” she argued plaintively, looking up into his pale eyes. Her own were captured there, held—caressed—by a look so intent that it made her toes curl up inside her high-topped shoes. She didn’t dare let herself remember how it had felt when he’d kissed her so ardently.
“Ladies don’t show their legs in this manner,” he said gently.
“Gentlemen don’t curse in front of ladies,” she countered, recalling his first words to her weeks ago.
He laughed mirthlessly. “Did I ever claim to be one?”
She brushed at a streak of dirt near her hip. “No, nor did I claim to be a great lady.” She hit at her pant legs irritably. “Oh, Jared. I’m hopeless. I have no social conversation, I like to do unladylike things…” She bit her lower lip. “It was Andrew who asked you to speak to me, wasn’t it? I saw him glaring out the window at me earlier. I’m not good enough for him,” she groaned.
“It was my grandmother who asked me to speak with you,” he countered, and hated himself for protecting the hateful Andrew. “She’s concerned. The neighbors are talking, it seems,” he added dryly.
She dropped the hoe and looked down to where it lay in the rich dirt. “See how fertile the soil is,” she remarked sadly. “Rich and loamy. It will grow exquisite vegetables.” She looked up accusingly. “Henry drinks,” she said shortly. “He has no time to take care of these seedlings.”
“I’ll speak with Henry as well, and if he doesn’t make a firm pledge of temperance, I’ll hire someone in his place.”
“Would you?” she asked animatedly.
He sighed heavily. “If that’s what it takes to have peace, yes. You and your cursed vegetables, Noelle!”
She smiled. “You like vegetables. I notice that you prefer them to meat at table…most of the time…” Her voice trailed off as she realized what she was admitting.
“You watch me,” he said.
She colored. “You intimidate me!” she said, defending herself.
He shook his head slowly.
“You imagine things. I have no need to devote my attention to you, sir,” she continued. “Surely you know that it is Andrew whom I find interesting. He is a soldier and an intelligent, responsible, dashing young man.”
He nodded. His eyes narrowed on her face and he looked at her until the slow color rose into her cheeks and fear came into her wide green eyes.
“Andrew is all the things that I am not,” he said quietly. “And it doesn’t surprise me that he fascinates you. But have a care, Noelle. A man who wishes only to change you has nothing to give you.”
“I don’t mind changing myself for the better. I wouldn’t want him to be ashamed of me. And you’re hardly the appropriate person to encourage me to be unconventional, sir.”
He chuckled deeply at that blatant misconception, but he didn’t challenge it. “Perhaps not. I find the sight of you with a hoe…appealing.” He stared at her legs so long that she flushed. He straightened. “But to please my grandmother, wear skirts and leave the gardening to the servants.”
She sighed. “I’ll make an effort.”
He searched her sad face. “Andrew mentioned that he’s taking you to the Benevolent Society dance Friday evening.”
“Yes.” She patted at her hair. “And no doubt I’ll slurp my punch, or spill some down one of the matron’s backs, or trip and knock over someone in the band!”
He smiled at her description. “Andrew will see that you make no social faux pas,” he assured her.
She looked up at him. “Are you going?”
He hesitated.
She moved closer, drawn by some alien force. She stared up into his shuttered eyes. “Please.”
His jaw tautened and something flared under his thick lashes that made her step away.
“You needn’t look so violent,” she said defensively. “You’ve worked very hard of late. I only thought that some recreation might improve you.”
“I require no such recreation,” he muttered. “Nor do I need to parade around for the benefit of the social matrons of the community who are openly shopping for sons-in-law at such functions.”
“But you are old,” she began, flushed. Then she stammered. “Well, not—not exactly old…”
“You’ll level that charge at me once too often,” he said after a moment’s daunting silence. “In some circumstances, age can be an advantage rather than a drawback.”
“Sir?”
He didn’t speak. He only stared at her with narrowed eyes until his meaning penetrated, and then she gasped. “Sir!”
His hard, thin lips pursed. “I should be ashamed,” he said almost to himself. “Forgive me, Noelle.”
“You rake!” she said unexpectedly.
He raised an eyebrow. “As you yourself said, I’m old. A man can hardly attain my advanced years without learning something of…life.”
She gripped her overalls tightly. “It’s unseemly for you to speak to me like this.”
“How conventional you sound for a young woman brazenly displaying so much of her legs in the garden!”
Her lower lip jutted. “Mr. Dunn!”
“All right.” He held up a hand. “But put the hoe up, won’t you? My grandmother will give me the wrong end of the buggy whip if I fail her a second time.”
She smiled with exasperation. “Jared, you’re a trial to me.”
He smiled, and his eyes were teasing. “How grown up you sound, Noelle,” he said. “Yet you’re green. Very green.”
There were secrets in his eyes as he looked at her. She felt a surge of emotion that made her tingle all over. She was reckless when she was with him. She had feelings that she didn’t want to acknowledge at all, and she had to remember that Jared wanted nothing to do with her. Andrew was the recipient of her affections. Why could she not remember that when she was within five feet of this man? Why did he alone have the power to weaken her?
“I shall be twenty in December,” she told him.
“So old? We’ll have to have a social evening to celebrate.” He looked up at the sky. It was darkening. “Come along, Noelle. I think we may have a shower.”
“The hoe…”
“Leave it,” he said irritably, but she bent down and picked it up defiantly, carrying it into the small implement shed before she rejoined him.
She clasped her hands at her waist as he gave her a hard look before he turned. She walked back to the house with him in a stiff silence.
“You delight in defying me, don’t you?” he asked curtly.
“Forgive me, but you seem to delight in giving orders.” She peeped up at him. “Are you certain that you were never in the army?”
“At one time I was an officer in the Texas Rangers,” he said surprisingly. “Over near El Paso.”
She stopped dead. “But…no one ever mentioned it.”
He stopped, too, and turned toward her. His pale eyes glittered down at her. “No one else knows, except my grandmother. I share more with her than with anyone. She went with my mother to Fort Worth while I remained…farther north. I drifted down to El Paso and took work as a Ranger, just briefly. A few months afterward, I was called to my mother’s deathbed. I went to Harvard then, to read law. My mother had saved a little to help me go.”
“Andrew’s father did not?”
“No. He died just before she did. He was a soldier, too, during the War Between the States. He retired as a colonel.”
“How interesting. And your father?”
His face was as closed as the implement shed door. “I never talk about the past. What I’ve told you is more than Andrew knows. We didn’t meet until my mother’s funeral.”
He turned and put his hand on the brass doorknob. Hers rested over it, and he threw it off, whirling to look at her wi
th eyes that made her breath catch in her throat.
“I’m…sorry,” she exclaimed, shocked by the violence of the action and the look on his face.
“Never touch me,” he said under his breath. “Never!”
She backed away from him, wide-eyed.
He took a quick breath and opened the door, muttering as he opened it and went inside, leaving her to follow or not as he stormed back down the hall to the study. The feel of her soft hand had all but undone him. After the passion he’d shared with her once, his body was attuned to her. When he was near her, it grew taut with tense desire. He could never fulfill the hunger she kindled in him, and he was frustrated and confused by the thoughts in his mind. Then she had touched him and his body had gone rigid with arousal. He could hardly admit such a thing, but to allow her to come any closer might have had disastrous consequences. She was Andrew’s concern, not his. Why in God’s name could he not remember that?
He slammed the door of the study behind him. Noelle passed it carefully and walked rapidly back to the staircase. Mrs. Dunn saw her through the open living room door and called to her.
She was curious about the heat in Noelle’s face and the tears she thought she saw in her eyes.
“Was Jared unpleasant?” she asked regretfully. “Forgive me, Noelle. I only wanted to spare you any more gossip. I should have spoken myself. If Jared upset you, I am sorry.”
“He said that he would make sure Henry did the work properly,” Noelle said assuringly. “Forgive me for troubling you. I meant no offense. I have much to learn.”
“I hope to help you learn it without the pain I suffered,” the older woman said quietly. “Gossip can be deadly, my girl. I know.”
“I’ll be more circumspect,” Noelle promised. “I don’t want to violate your hospitality, or cause you any trouble.” She hesitated. “Mrs. Dunn, I could go back and stay with my uncle.”
The older woman joined her in the hall. “My dear, it would grieve me to lose you now,” she said, with genuine fondness. “I do not mean to hurt you. We have neighbors with reckless tongues, and I am sensitive—more sensitive than most, perhaps—to being the object of so much unwanted interest.”
“And I have been most uncooperative,” Noelle said sadly. She smiled and kissed the elderly cheek. “Forgive me. I’ll try harder. And Jared…did not upset me,” she added. “We simply disagree a great deal. He’s a most difficult man.”
“Yes. But he’s kind to those he loves.”
Which certainly didn’t include Noelle, she thought miserably. He was frequently unkind to her.
* * *
THE NIGHT OF the dance, Noelle wore her pretty sapphire silk dress with the white lace and satin trim and silver buttons. She tried a new style with her hair, in ringlets around her face and big curls held back by a sapphire ribbon. She wasn’t beautiful, but she did look attractive, and the gown fit well in the nicest, most decent way. She had a pretty velvet hooded cloak to wear with it, and her new black shoes.
Mrs. Dunn was wearing black velvet with black satin trim. She looked very elegant. Andrew, in his dark evening clothes, was incredibly handsome. He smiled at Noelle and offered her one arm while he extended the other elbow to Mrs. Dunn.
“It seems that I shall have you two beautiful ladies to myself this evening.” He chuckled. “Jared is working late, again.”
Noelle would not for the world have admitted, even to herself, how disappointing that statement was.
“I can’t think that he will be missed,” she said flippantly. “In fact, the evening has just improved.”
“I agree,” Andrew said. “He is a most unhumorous man. Come, then. Let’s be off.”
He helped them into the waiting carriage and entertained them with stories of his comrades in the Philippines all the way to the town hall, where the dance was being held.
The decorations followed a spring motif, with paper flowers and lovely cut-flower arrangements. The band played waltzes while the assembled personages, almost a who’s who of the Fort Worth social register, drank punch and nibbled canapés and talked about modern evils and what could be done to correct them.
“I thought this was to be a banquet followed by a dance,” Andrew confided to a radiant Noelle while they danced very correctly around the room. “I shall starve.”
Noelle wouldn’t admit that she was hungry, too, but she was. Jared had cost her her appetite for the past few days. But now, dancing with Andrew, she felt more cheerful than she had in a long time. Her dress was very up-to-date and people were treating her as good company. No one remarked about her presence except in a positive way, and Andrew had to avoid several young men who looked with interest in her direction. Ironically, their interest enhanced his, so that the lovely Miss Beale, who had come with a socially acceptable young man from Dallas, glared at him angrily from across the room.
Noelle noticed the girl’s animosity with interest. Miss Beale was very pretty—prettier than Noelle, certainly. But Andrew was ignoring her, and very blatantly.
“Miss Beale is piqued,” she remarked as he swung her around to the rhythm of the waltz.
“Is she?” he remarked, sounding indifferent. In fact, he was excited, because up until now most of the interest had been on Andrew’s part. Miss Beale had been like a princess flattered by a commoner’s interest. He had deliberately refrained from asking her to partner him, to see what her reaction would be. It was more than he’d dared hope for. Tonight, she was very obviously jealous, and he was intrigued to have two young women vying for his affections.
While Miss Beale was pretty, Noelle was unconsciously seductive and sensuous. His gloved hand on her waist made no improper moves, but all the time he danced with her, he wondered how it would feel to slide his hand up to her pert, firm breasts and smooth over the silk that covered them. The thought of it made him dizzy with pleasure. He found Noelle exciting.
Because of it, he was more attentive than he had ever been, fetching punch and little cakes for her and giving her his undivided attention. During intermission, he sat with her on the side of the room where chairs lined the wall and talked about his adventures—both abroad and since he’d left the army. It never occurred to Noelle that he evinced no interest whatsoever in her past or present, or in her life. He asked no questions about her, made no comments about her home or her family. He knew little about her and apparently was content for it to be so.
Forcibly she was reminded that Jared had a way of peering into every cranny and crook of her life. He knew more about her than any other member of the household, and yet he had no apparent interest in her. In fact, she recalled painfully, he could not even bear to have her touch his hand. That shattering discovery had hurt her. It was really no surprise when he didn’t come tonight. Apparently she was now repulsive to him, for reasons she couldn’t begin to fathom.
“You’re very pensive tonight, my dear,” Andrew remarked as she finished the last of her punch.
“I’m sorry,” she said, smiling. “I was just enjoying the music,” she lied.
“It is rather good, isn’t it? We had a regimental band that was truly superb,” he recalled. “I wish you could have heard it. I do miss the service, Noelle. Civilian life is not the same.”
“Why did you leave it?” she asked.
“Because there’s so little for an army to do in peacetime,” he replied, sighing. “What a pity.”
She started to reply when his head turned and he uttered a short, amused laugh.
“Well, look at that,” he exclaimed. “So he did decide to come. And what a charming companion he has brought with him.”
Noelle turned in her chair to look—and was just in time to see Jared entering, resplendent in evening clothes, with the most beautiful blonde woman Noelle had ever seen on his arm. She fought down a surge of jealousy, reminding herself that she was And
rew’s companion and that she had no right to resent Jared bringing a woman with him. He was single, was he not? All the same, she felt a sense of possessiveness about Andrew’s stepbrother that was out of character and totally without reason.
“Lovely, is she not?” Andrew asked. “The eligible Miss Amanda Doyle. Her father is a railroad baron, and he and his wife are unimaginably protective of their three daughters.” He didn’t add that Miss Doyle had rejected his suit rather brutally. “I could hardly imagine Jared with such a young and wealthy debutante. He must have hidden depths, if he has impressed her.”
Chapter Eight
IT TOOK ALL Noelle’s willpower to keep from blurting out that she knew there was more to Jared than met the eye. It was painful to remember how hungry she’d been in his arms. It was more painful to know that he was aware of her helpless desire, her response. Perhaps bringing the beautiful Miss Doyle was his way of emphasizing that he had no use whatsoever for a young, very green country girl from Galveston. He was a cultured, wealthy, and intelligent city man who would never marry beneath him.
“You look very pale,” Andrew said, with some concern. “Here, Noelle. Do you want to sit down?”
“No, thank you,” she said huskily. She smiled up at him. “I’d like to dance again, Andrew.”
He held her very correctly and began to waltz her around the crowded room. He danced with expertise, and he was very handsome. Noelle knew that other women were watching her with envy. Andrew in evening clothes was the epitome of a cultured gentleman.
But even though she was flattered at being his escort, there was a deep hurt inside her when she looked toward Jared. If Andrew was handsome, Jared was striking in evening wear. Just the sight of him made Noelle’s knees weak. He was attentive to the Doyle woman, very correct, but smiling and faintly affectionate. He held her arm possessively as he introduced her to his grandmother, and the way he looked at her made Noelle feel cold and alone.
“I had no idea that you could dance so well, Noelle,” Andrew said when the waltz ended. “I’m surprised.”