by B. J. Harvey
I unravel my arms from around her waist and lift my fingers to the buttons lying over her heart, deftly undoing each one with a twist before lowering my lips for a gentle kiss on the skin left in its wake.
She grips my shoulders, her head dropping back as a throaty moan escapes her, her grip tightening, her nails biting into me as I run my tongue around her belly button and lick my way back up her body until I’m nipping her neck and biting her earlobe.
Easing my fingers down her middle, I drop my mouth to her black lace bra, sucking her nipple through the fabric as my hand dips into the open front of her dress and beneath her underwear. A deep, guttural moan rumbles in my chest when I meet her slick heat, my index finger tracing the seam of her until I find her entrance, wet and burning hot, her hips thrusting forward, begging me to dip inside.
I move my attention to her other nipple, grazing my teeth along the sensitive skin, sucking it deep, her cries filling the room.
“Drew… God! More… no, less… God, I don’t know!”
I bite the curve of her breast before soothing it with my tongue and chuckling as she presses her chest harder against me.
She pulls me back to standing by my hair. My hands make a trail up her body, slipping under the straps of her dress and easing them over her shoulders and arms. My eyes drop to watch the silk slide down her body and pool at her feet on the hotel room floor.
“Fuck, you’re beautiful,” I whisper, my eyes drinking her in as I look from her legs to her hips, her waist to her chest, then her parted lips, her gaze as wild as my erratic pulse.
We stand there, enjoying each other, her fingers running over my bare chest, her nails catching my nipples as she passes.
“I love you, Ash,” I repeat like the dam has burst and I can’t stop saying it. I can’t believe she’s giving me the chance to say it, so if I have to say it ten, twenty, a thousand times to make this whole thing real, I’ll do it.
“I need to kiss you,” she whispers, her gaze full of burning need as she reaches across, pushes down my pants and drops to her knees. Her fist wraps around my cock as she lowers her head and swallows me whole.
I’m forced to lock my knees to stop them from buckling out from under me. My fingers glide into her hair and just rest there, moving with every dip and bob of her head. She swirls her tongue around the tip, grating her teeth ever so gently against the head and grazing underneath before meeting my eyes and slowly—achingly fucking slowly—taking all of me inside her mouth again.
Knowing my orgasm will come far too fast if she keeps this up, I pull back my hips, bending down and putting my arms under hers. I move both of us to the bed, kicking off my pants in the process. I stand beside the mattress, taking in the sight of her naked in my bed, where I’ve always wanted her to be, where she always should have been. Her soft gaze and gentle smile undo me, and I’m soon hovering over her, my elbows framing her shoulders, my lips grazing hers once, then twice, my hand reaching between us as I position myself at her entrance.
“Shit,” I curse, dropping my chin to my chest. Ash reaches up and cups my jaw, adding pressure until I’m looking at her again, her raised brow asking the silent question. “Ash, I don’t have any condoms. This was not what I was expecting—far from it, actually—when I decided to tell you I still loved you.”
“God, I love hearing that. I’m not sure I’m ever going to get sick of it. But Drew, would you ever hurt me?”
“Not willingly.”
She bites her lip, her eyes scanning my face. “Do we need a condom? Because I’m clean, and I’d really like to feel you.” One of her hands snakes down between us, gripping my cock and lazily stroking up and down against her hot core.
“Fuck,” I growl, dropping my forehead to rest against hers. “Put me inside of you, Ash. Your hand on my cock is gonna make me blow like a bumbling schoolboy.”
She smiles against my lips, her tongue diving out to trace the outline of my mouth. “You’ve never bumbled me.” Then she thrusts forward, her outstretched palm pressing on my ass until I’m buried to the hilt inside of her.
Her guttural moans threaten to unman me. Her burning-hot sheath surrounds me, putting me under a spell I never want to escape from. Her arms and legs are wrapped around my shoulders and thighs, and my hands are buried in her hair as I devour her mouth and attack her throat and chest. It’s as if both of us are trying to get as close as we can without climbing into each other’s skin.
The last coherent thought that crosses my mind as I slowly pull pack and plunge inside of her is that I’m finally home.
I barely sleep, constantly reaching out to reassure myself that—yes—last night did truly happen, and that I have Ash back in the way I’ve wanted her for a long time. She told me she loved me, and for the first time ever, I said it back.
The bed shifts and Ash rolls over, draping her tanned thigh over my hip, pressing her body and heat against my side.
The one thing we didn’t get to last night was the most important thing of all. But it didn’t seem right to mar such a monumental reunion with my complications. It’s the only niggling doubt in my mind. The only thing I’ve held back from her. I meant every single word I said to her last night, every promise, every oath, every I love you. Saying those three little words by far eclipsed anything else that has happened in my thirty-two-year life. Absolutely everything.
A warm, smooth hand glides over my side and along my chest, red polished nails gently raking my skin as they go, sending jolts of lust straight through me. I thought three times last night would be enough. My lengthening cock has other ideas, and the pulsing throb between my legs makes it hard to think about anything else but burying myself deep inside her again.
I snake my arm around her shoulder to roll her on top of me. She rests her head against my pec, her blonde hair fanning out over my skin. I decide I don’t ever want to move from this bed.
“Sleepy…”
“You’re well overdue.”
She jerks her head up, sleepy hooded eyes meeting mine with avid curiosity. “Overdue?”
“Well, it’s…” I look over to the alarm clock beside the bed, “… eight a.m., and I have an hour before I have to get up and meet your brother. And we’re running out of time to have sex again before I need to leave.”
She tenses for a second but relaxes just as fast. I rub my hands up from her hips, my palms gliding against the skin as I graze my thumbs along the sides of her breasts then retreat back down to the small of her back and start all over again.
“I’m not going to tell him today. We can’t do that. I’ve already ruined one wedding. This wedding has to happen, because it’s fate, and there’s no one else on this Earth for Millen other than Kenzie and vice versa. They deserve their happy, and I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure this day goes off without a hitch.”
“And me?”
I lift my head to brush my lips against hers, my hands still traveling up and down her silky-smooth skin that I’m as addicted to as I always was. “You are my everything.”
She rests her forearms on my chest and looks down at me. “God, that feels so good.”
“You feel so good. I’ve missed you so damn much.”
She cups my face and presses her lips to mine, delving her tongue inside my mouth for a slow and lazy battle with mine, and it’s as if the world stops spinning, just for a moment.
This is what she does to me. She makes me forget about everything. Work? What’s that? Millen? Millen who? My dead mom? My as-still-undefined relationship with my father? Personal life dramas? What are those? With her, I feel invincible.
In all our previous—often stolen—times together, I felt at peace. It’s when the world starts turning again, and real life encroaches on our bubble that the problems start: her brother, my father, her mom’s illness, us lying to everyone, hiding things from each other, the constant fear of being sprung, and baby-mama dramas.
There are so many things I regret in my life, so many th
ings I hope Ash can forgive me for—so many things I have to tell her. My only hope is that she has the wherewithal to stick by me in the aftermath.
She pulls back, her eyes soft and gentle, her body melting into mine. “I love you, Drew Peters. I think I was born to.”
I swallow the heavy lump in my throat, my heart pounding at the thought of losing this woman again. There’s so much I still need to tell her, but in this moment, it’s not right. It’s not the time or the place. But I will. I don’t want to hold anything back from her ever again.
“I love you too. You’ll be my last. Promise me you’ll remember that.”
She stiffens, the air in the room suddenly thick with tension. “Why do I need to—”
“I’m not taking back anything I said or did. I don’t want you to ever think that last night was anything less than what it was because that was hands’ down the best night of my life, and that’s all because of you.”
“You really think we can do this?”
“I know we can. I just need you to believe that we will end up together. Whatever happens, whatever we have to go through to get there, you and me? We’re meant to be.”
“That’s super cheesy. You know that, right?”
I grin against her lips. “That it may be, but as long as you believe it, I’ll be as cheesy as you want me to be.”
“I’d rather you get busy doing something else…” She bucks her hips up against mine, her eyes flashing with undeniable heat.
“I guess I’d better get busy then.”
An hour and fifteen minutes later—hey, I’ve got a tradition to uphold with being fashionably late to Millen’s weddings—I’m knocking on his hotel-room door, riding cloud nine and just how good my life can be. With Ashley’s taste on my lips and memories of our night together playing through my mind, I spend the rest of the morning counting down the hours until I can get her alone again for a repeat performance.
It’s dusk in the beautiful French Riviera. The sun is slowly setting, coloring the sky a rusty orange. On an almost empty sand-covered beach my best friend stands to my right, holding the hand of his beautiful soon-to-be wife, having just vowed ‘till death do us part.’
I never thought I’d get the chance to share this day with him and the woman he loves. Since I kind of dated his girl, Millen had every right to cut me out of his life forever, and he did for a spell. Kenzie could have held a grudge against me that lasted an eternity, but she’s been pivotal in helping repair the friendship between Millen and me.
The other person who almost ruined their lives is thousands of miles away in Sacramento, living in my house. What else was I supposed to do when she turned up on my doorstep three months ago needing a place to stay? She’s my consequence from a night of drunken stupidity when my ego led my dick astray. She’s carrying my child—a baby she used to manipulate Millen, a baby she’s definitely using to manipulate me.
I know I’m on thin ice with Millen though. Another fuck up and I’ll lose the man who’s more of a brother than a best friend. And the person who’s going to be the final nail in my friendship’s coffin is standing just twenty feet away from me, her blonde hair shining in the fading light, her blue eyes shimmering with happy tears as she watches her brother get married.
Ashley Ross: the girl who had a high school crush on me. The girl who gave me her virginity. The same woman who came into my hotel room, told me she loved me, and claimed me as her own all last night and well into this morning.
“You may kiss the bride.”
A loud cheer erupts followed by even louder applause as Millen wraps his arm around Kenzie’s bare back, dips her low, and kisses the living shit out of her, both of them laughing as they go.
Then it happens—that hammer lowering toward the nail. My phone rings from my back pocket.
“Shit!”
All eyes swing my way.
“Sorry, sorry!” I say, digging my hand in my pants to grab the offending object.
Pulling it out, I see Lana’s name on the screen.
“Fuuuuckkk,” I groan, waving Millen off as both he and Kenzie stare at me with wide eyes and high brows in equal measure. My gaze darts to Ashley, who’s wearing a dress that matches her sexy devil within. The temptress who has become more of a constant than I ever intended in the beginning. The woman I can’t ever imagine being without again.
“I’ve gotta answer this. I’m sorry,” I say to the group by way of an apology.
“Who could be that important, dude?” Millen asks.
I freeze, my phone still vibrating in my hand. “You don’t want me to answer that. Not here and definitely not now.”
The flash in his eyes and Kenzie’s surprised gasp tell me no further explanation is necessary.
“She just can’t help herself, can she?” Kenzie snarks, shaking her head as she burrows deeper into her husband’s side. Kenzie’s best friend Gaby, and her fiancé, Bruno, Kenzie’s dad, and Ashley are now circled around us.
“Just ignore it,” Millen urges, but his expression is tight.
“I can’t.”
“Why the fuck not?” he asks, his terse voice grabbing everyone’s attention now.
“She’s pregnant. Something could be wrong.”
“I fucking know she’s pregnant, Drew. Surely she’ll leave a message if it’s that important? She’s not due yet so she’s probably ringing because she’s hoping to interrupt the festivities.”
The phone stops ringing and the decision to answer is taken out of my hands. Millen’s shoulders relax, the tension visibly leaving his body. I’m torn between responsibility and denial.
Responsibility wins out. “I better call her back.”
“Drew…” he growls. “Lana Mason already took enough from me. She doesn’t get to exist, today of all days.”
My phone buzzes with a text and my eyes drop to it.
It stops me in my tracks.
“She has to fucking exist, Millen. I don’t get a say in that. Especially not now.” Probably not ever.
“She’s your baby’s mother—that’s all.”
“If only,” I mutter.
Millen goes deathly still at my reply. I feel the blood rush from my face, my eyes darting to Ashley, taking one last look at her before I drop the bomb none of them could’ve seen coming. The one that’s going to obliterate any chance of the future I want with Ashley. The future I was finally ready to let myself have.
“I’ve gotta go.”
Millen’s head jerks back. “What the fuck? Why? You haven’t even given your speech yet.”
Fuck it. There’s no escaping now. I may have kept this secret for the past few months but there’s no way I can keep doing so now.
“Because you’re not the only one who’s fucking married, and as of an hour ago, she’s in labor,” I state matter of factly.
Ashley’s shocked cry turns heads. I meet her eyes, and my heart shatters into a million pieces at the pain I see written all over her face. She spins on her heels and runs up the makeshift aisle toward the hotel.
Millen’s gaze jerks from me to his baby sister and back to me, his eyes harder than stone “Oh, no… oh, fuck no,” he growls, his voice low and menacing as he obviously puts two and two together.
Kenzie and Gaby gasp in unison before shrieking as they scramble into action, Gaby going after Ashley, Kenzie grabbing Millen’s arm, but it’s too late.
I don’t see his fist coming until it’s slamming into my face. My head snaps to the side, stabbing pain slicing through my jaw. It’s the second time he’s punched me. Coincidentally, both times have been at weddings, but I’m too focused on Ashley’s retreat and the tears in her eyes to deflect his shot or fight him off.
Thankfully Bruno steps in, holding Millen back. He struggles against him, clearly wanting to have another go. Millen’s glittering eyes pin me in place, his next words cutting me to the bone. With the finality in his tone, I’m in no doubt that the hammer has not only dropped, but that the coffin is well and
truly buried.
“Kenzie, Lana, and now my sister? Third strike, motherfucker. We’re fucking done.”
Ashley
When I was seventeen, I met a man who acted like a boy, and I fell in schoolgirl love.
At eighteen, he came back all man, and I made sure I’d remember him forever.
At twenty-one, I realized how hard I’d fallen for him and prayed he’d never break me.
At twenty-three, I let our secret slip and lost him.
At twenty-four, I gave him an ultimatum and lost all hope, and it was my turn to run far, far away.
Last night, at twenty-nine, I finally took a stand. He told me he loved me for the first time, and I gave him my heart again. He held me close like I was the most precious thing he’d ever have and under the midnight moon, he promised I’d be his last love, that one day he’d be mine and I’d be his. No complications, no obstacles, nothing but love and happy-ever-afters.
Today should’ve been a good day, watching my only brother marry the love of his life while the love of mine stood at his side. Instead, one phone call, one admission, and my heart shattered into a million pieces, all hope I ever had of us being together destroyed forever by eight words.
‘You’re not the only one who’s fucking married’
He married Lana and last night he told me he loved me.
Now I can never be his in the way he’s always been mine, and again I’m running far, far away.
This time, there’s no reason to ever come back.
Drew
Every part of my being wants to run after Ashley and tell her to trust me, but the mess I’ve just made at another one of Millen’s weddings has me frozen where I stand. The look on her face when I announced I was married to Lana will haunt me forever. With everything that happened between us last night, it was the one part of the story I never got to explain. I always meant to. It wasn’t something I planned on hiding from her—from everyone—but I wanted to enjoy the moment, enjoy my reunion with Ash.