by E. L. Todd
Sweet Sins
This is a work of fiction. All the characters and events portrayed in this novel are fictitious or used fictitiously. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the publisher or author, except in the case of a reviewer, who may quote brief passages in a review.
Copyright © 2014 by E. L. Todd
All Rights Reserved
ISBN-13: 978-1497369122
ISBN-10: 1497369126
Sweet Sins
Book Nineteen of the Forever and Always Series
E. L. Todd
1
Hazel
When we came back to his apartment, he locked the door then pulled me into his arms, squeezing me so tightly I could barely breathe. His arms were shaking and his breathing was heavy. It was late into the night but neither one of us were tired.
I was so happy we were back together, but as soon as we were in each other’s arms, I felt horrible. Guilt and sickness squirmed in my stomach. All this pain was caused by me.
“I’m so sorry…”
“It’s okay. I’m just glad you’re in my arms right now.” His voice came out as a whisper, his arms still hooked around me.
“I should have believed you.”
He released his grip then pressed his face close to mine. “I don’t want to argue.” The look in his eyes told me what he wanted. The pain went deep, soaking so far into his soul that I feared it would never come out. I hated to imagine every night he was home alone, thinking about me and how he could get me back. We wasted so much time, letting a bitch rip us apart.
Flynn guided me to his bedroom then placed me on his unmade bed. Empty beer bottles covered the nightstand, rings of moisture marking the wood. Clothes and bags were everywhere, like he hadn’t cleaned or moved since I left his place.
He moved over me and kissed me, taking his time just like he used to. Judging the quiver of his lips, he couldn’t believe I was real. I felt the distant taste of salt on his lips, and then I felt worse for breaking his heart.
Flynn slowly undressed me, never breaking his lips from mine until he pulled my shirt off. My hands grabbed his clothes and ripped them away, wanting to see the body I loved so much. His chest was hard and defined, but lean and toned. His body was perfect, not too bulky and big. I got his jeans and boxers off, letting his cock break free. It was so long and thick. I moaned when I saw it, remembering how much I missed it.
The cocky look was in his eyes. “It looks like you missed him more than me.”
“It was a close race…”
He grinned then kissed me again, separating my thighs with his hand. He found the nub between my legs and worked his magic. I hadn’t been touched in so long that my body immediately responded. I arched my back and moaned, loving the way he touched me. He applied more pressure and pushed me to the edge. I was gripping his forearms, knowing what was going to come next.
Then he stopped. “I know I’m not going to last long.” His cock found my entrance like it had a mind of its own then slid inside.
My nails dug into his skin while I writhed at the feel of him. The familiar stretching and pleasurable fullness made me pant. Oh, I missed this.
He moved at a slow pace, his eyes locked onto my face. It was the slowest we ever moved besides our first time. Moans escaped his mouth while he thrust inside me, burying his entire length.
The fire burned inside me, slowly stretching and escaping into a wildfire. Everything burned, everything made me crash. It felt so good. It’d been so long. I moaned his name, feeling me tighten around him as the explosion rocked my body, making my toes curl and my back arch. “Flynn…”
He released at the same time. His final thrusts were quick. He grunted and breathed while he moved through my slickness. “Baby…” He pressed his head to mine and closed his eyes, moving slightly as the tenderness rocked through him.
My high started to dwindle but I never released my desperate hold on him. I was never going to let him go, not after the week of pure agony I experienced. And I knew I had a lot of making up to do. I put him through hell.
He pulled out of me then lay beside me, catching his breath. His arm hooked around my waist and pulled me to his chest, our bodies glued together. His hand snaked up my back, feeling my bare skin. “Beautiful.”
I missed hearing that. Only he could make me believe it. I always felt like I wasn’t good enough for anyone, but Flynn elevated me and reminded me I was worth something. It was one of the things I loved about him most. He never tore me down.
My fingers lightly stroked his chest, feeling his heartbeat thud strongly. It fluttered under my fingertips. My hands moved up to his shoulders then threw his brown hair.
He opened his eyes and stared at me, watching me caress him lovingly. “I dreamed you so many times that I forget you’re real.”
My hand stilled for a moment before it continued. “I hope they were good dreams.”
“Always.”
Looking into his eyes made me realize how horrible of a person I was. For our entire relationship, I’d been second-guessing him, doubting him and saying I couldn’t trust him. But in reality, I was the one causing the strain. Since I spent so much time waiting for him to break my heart, I never gave him the benefit of the doubt he deserved. “I don’t deserve you.”
His eyes didn’t flash and his body didn’t move. “I hate to think what would have happened if Scarlet didn’t take a chance on me.” There was no bitterness to his voice, just a sad tone. “I understand why you jumped to conclusions so easily. I do. But, I admit your lack of trust is starting to get to me. You’ve been waiting for me to screw up the entire time, and as soon as it got bumpy, you took off and wouldn’t listen to any explanation I provided. You turned your back on me so easily, your best friend. Remember, above all things, we’re friends. That comes before lovers and roommates. Would you give Cortland the benefit of the doubt?”
“Well…I don’t know.”
“Yes, you would.” A small amount of anger escaped. “I may have been a playboy, but you can’t keep holding that against me. I never tricked women into sleeping with me. They knew exactly what they were getting when they came back to my place. I’m not a liar and refuse to be one. There are too many people out there destroying the goodness of truth. If you knew me at all, understood me even at a basic level, you would know that I wouldn’t lie to anyone, even if I didn’t respect them.”
I averted my gaze because I knew he was right. I’m surprised he even took me back. I was constantly screwing up this relationship, hurting him more than he ever hurt me.
“And the fact you believed I would do anything like that was a stab to the heart. Seriously? Why would I sleep with Zahara the second you’re gone? It doesn’t even make sense. Why wouldn’t I just be with her, then? Why would my ex-girlfriend settle for being my mistress?” The longer he spoke, the more anger escaped. “It’s ridiculous, Hazel. You believed the lie because you wanted to believe it. That’s what it comes down to.”
I couldn’t take this anymore. I ruined us. It was my fault, completely and utterly. I drove Kyle away because I wasn’t sexy enough, and now I pushed Flynn away because I didn’t trust him. Every relationship failed because of me. I sat up and turned away. “I understand if you don’t want to be with me anymore…”
“Don’t want to be with you?” he asked incredulously. “You think I worked my ass off to prove my innocence just for kicks?” That made him more upset. I could hear it in his voice. He gripped my arm and pulled me back to him. “While I’m thrilled you’re back in my life, I want to make sure you understand that you need to make some changes. I wouldn’t have worked my ass off
for anyone else. Honestly, if you were Zahara, I would have proved my innocence to clear my name then walked away. But you’re very special to me. I’m not saying that entitles you to get away with everything. It doesn’t. I want you to make some changes in this relationship. I deserve that.”
“I know…”
He stared at me hard, watching my eyes.
“I’ll be better. I promise.”
“I’m not asking for better. This is it, Hazel. You either trust me or you don’t. If you don’t, I can’t keep chasing you down to convince you. We’re past that stage. You need to be my partner and my ally. I can’t keep babying you. I’ve done everything I possibly can to prove myself to you. But I’m done. You need to make a decision.”
“Meaning…?”
His eyes filled with pain. “If you don’t trust me…I have to let you go.”
My heart shattered into a million pieces. It circulated in my veins and scraped the walls. Pain like I’ve never known filled my stomach. His ultimatum was justified. I just wish it hadn’t come to this. “I do.”
“You do what?” he pressed.
“I trust you,” I said firmly.
He stared into my eyes, looking for hesitation. “Are you sure? Because I can’t keep getting hurt like this.”
“Yes,” I said firmly. “I do.”
His eyes relaxed and he kissed me on the forehead. “Thank you.”
“I’m so sorry about everything, Flynn. I feel horrible, really.”
“I know.” His anger was gone. It vanished. “Let’s start over.”
“You’re letting me off the hook that easily?”
A playful look moved into his eyes. “No. You have a lot of making up to do.” The meaning was implied. “You’ll be working your ass off for while, literally.”
I felt the smile upturn my lips. “I can do that.”
“It wasn’t a request.” His hand moved across my hip, his fingers trailing lightly. He placed a few kisses where his fingers just were, touching me in a way he never had before.
I watched him, my fingers moving through his hair.
“I can probably get your job back.” He kissed my stomach then pulled away.
“My job?”
“At the production.”
“Oh.” I thought that ship was long gone.
“You want it, right?”
I wasn’t sure. The long hours and catty girls were weighing on me. Plus, my feet were killing me. But it was my passion. “I don’t know.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “You don’t know?”
“I guess I just need a break.”
“You’ll quit your job, right?”
“I can’t. Sean stuck his neck out for me to help me out. It would be a slap in the face if I just walked away after a week.”
“I think he’ll manage,” he said with a smile. “A CEO has more important things to care about.”
“But he was there for me, helping me get my things and giving me a stable job. That would be so disrespectful.”
“I’m sure he understands that dancing is your passion.”
“But I love having money,” I said honestly. “It’s nice to buy lunch once in a while.”
He gave me a dark look. “I have money.”
“I’m not taking anything that belongs to you.”
“To us,” he said firmly.
“Flynn, I appreciate the offer, but we aren’t married. Your money belongs to you.”
“So if we were married, you’d let me take care of you?”
I just backed myself into a wall. “I don’t know…”
“If we weren’t together for only a few months, I’d propose,” he said bluntly. “But, I don’t want to rush into anything. But I really don’t want you to only let me take care of you because of a marriage license filed with the state.”
“I don’t want to take advantage of you.”
“Relationships are about give and take,” he said.
“But I have nothing to give back.”
“You give a lot more than you realize.” He gave me a hard look. “Money isn’t the most important thing. All the little things you do don’t go unnoticed. I love the way you greet me when I get home, the way you make dinner for me every night, the way you rub my back after a long day without me asking. I like that you let me claim you as mine. You give me joy, Hazel, in a nutshell. I’d really like it if you didn’t stress about money. Take your time and choose projects you really want to take on, not just to pay the bills. That’s no way to live.”
He was a smooth talker. “You should have been a lawyer.”
He gave me that cocky grin that was forever burned into my brain. “I know my way around a debate.”
“Don’t let it go to your head.”
“So, you’ll quit like I asked?”
“I’ll talk to Sean.”
He smirked. “Good. Because I can get you a job anywhere you want in theatre.”
“I want to make it on my own,” I said firmly. “I don’t want you to pull any strings.”
For once, he didn’t argue with me. “Okay.”
I snuggled into him, glad the hardest part was over.
“So…you got a date to the wedding?” He rubbed his nose against mine.
“Not yet,” I said playfully.
“Well, would you like to go with me?”
I shrugged. “I’ll think about it.”
He growled.
I chuckled. “You don’t like being rejected, do you?”
“I never get rejected.”
“Cocky as ever.”
He growled again. “Go with me.”
“Alright, I guess I’ll go.”
“Good.” He nuzzled my neck. “Because I want to dance with you.”
“Really?” That was sweet in a way I couldn’t explain.
“Yeah.” He rubbed his nose against mine. “I’m good on my feet. I’d like to show you my moves.”
“I’ve seen your moves…”
“Then you know what to expect.”
“God, you’re so arrogant.”
He laughed then pulled me closer to his body. “I just know what my baby likes.”
I savored his scent while we lay together on the bed, enjoying the silence. I was so glad to be back in his arms again. He was the most wonderful man in the world. “Will you help me get my things?”
“Of course. But I’m chaining everything down so you can’t leave again.”
“I never will. You don’t have to worry about that.”
A softness moved into his eyes. “This is off to a good start.”
Even though it was midnight, Flynn wanted to make breakfast. He was odd in that way, never living life to any set of rules. He did what he wanted when he wanted to. But I loved that about him.
“Step back.” Flynn held the pan then launched the pancake into the air, flipping it.
“Just use the spatula,” I said with a laugh.
“That’s no fun.” He shook the pan then flipped it again. This time it stuck to the roof, just like the other three.
I shook my head. “Clearly, you aren’t good at this.”
“I’ll get it. I just need practice.”
“We’re never going to eat at this rate.”
He poured more batter into the pan then stepped back. “Now you try.”
“I’m going to make you feel stupid.”
“Impossible,” he said with a cocky smirk.
I took the handle then flipped the pancake, making it land back in the pan. “You could learn a thing or two from me.”
“But you barely got it in the air. That’s no fun.”
I shook my head and laughed. “At least I have something to eat now.”
He snatched the pancake out with his bare hand then shoved it into his mouth.
“Jerk!” I slapped his arm. “That was mine!”
He licked his fingers while victory shined in his eyes. “Thanks for making breakfast.”
I growled. “That was y
our plan all along.”
He shrugged. “Guilty.”
“You’re lucky you’re so hot.”
“I know.”
I rolled my eyes then hit him again. “Are you humble about anything?”
“No.” He grabbed the carton of orange juice and drank it without pouring a glass first.
“That’s gross.”
He finished then wiped his mouth. “And you think clipping your toe nails in front of the TV isn’t?”
“It’s too cold to go on the balcony!”
“It’s called a bathroom,” he snapped. “Maybe you should use it once in a while.”
I growled then threw a muffin at him. “I hate you.”
“Say that next time I’m inside you.”
I growled again. “Didn’t your mother teach you to be a gentleman?”
“Yes, but then my dad taught me how to be a real man.”
Whatever. I poured another pancake into the pan and watched it bubble.
He came behind me then wrapped his arms around me. “Baby, you know I’m kidding.”
I smiled then looked up, seeing him stared down at me. “I know.”
He kissed my forehead then slapped my ass.
I rolled my eyes. “We were so close.”
“Don’t act like you don’t love it.”
Actually, I did love it. But I would never admit it.
A knock on the door made us both freeze. Who the hell would be at his apartment this late at night? Maybe it was Zahara. For the first time, I hoped it were her. I wanted to slap that bitch across the face.
Flynn stared at the door before he walked to it, looking through the peephole.
“Who is it?” I whispered.
“Cade.”
His brother?
He turned to me, seeing my nipples through my shirt because I didn’t have a bra on. He grabbed a sweater from the coatrack then threw it at me. “Pull this on.”
I caught it then pulled it over my head. It fell down to my knees.
Flynn opened it, his hand resting on the door. “What’s going on?”
Cade stood on the doorstep, a backpack over his shoulder and a bag in his hand.