“I can only imagine.” She wondered how long he’d stayed in Montana, but it was at least long enough to learn how to treat injured cattle. He looked uncomfortable, and she wondered if he might possibly be thinking about the night he told her he was going to Montana. The night he’d kissed her. He glanced at the dog and she did, too, trying not to think about that night. That kiss.
“He’s got kindness in his eyes. He’s easygoing. He’s going to make you a good friend, I think.” Jarrod started walking again.
Cassidy hurried to beat him to the door. “That’s what I was thinking. But then again, he is hurt and weak. He could be a terror.”
Jarrod laughed, and the uncomfortable moment was passed, though she still wondered how long the draw of Montana had kept him. “I think it’ll be fine. Doc sent some antibiotics and instructions. He said the patient should be moving more tomorrow. He’s still on a little heavy-duty painkiller and feeling slightly woozy, I think.”
“So that explains the lazy kind of vibe that’s going on right now.”
“Uh, yeah, I think that’s what we’re seeing.”
Jarrod flashed a devastating smile, and Cassidy forgot what she’d been about to say. “Um . . .”
“Where do you want him?” he asked over his shoulder.
She hurried to open the door and pointed into the side room. “There on the pallet.”
He walked past her, brushing her arm as he did. Her pulse kicked in again and butterflies winged their way through her, unexpected and again unwanted. This was not going to do. He walked through the door she held open and then she followed him inside.
She watched him stoop down, in jeans, and the muscles stretched taut beneath his cotton shirt as he leaned in and gently set down the dog.
“I’m so glad he’s okay,” she said, yanking back when Jarrod stood. He moved to let her through the doorway and brushing past him did not help calm her nerves.
Focusing on her dog, she bent down and placed her hand gently on Duce’s head. “I’m so happy you’ve survived and are going live with me now, Duce.” She looked up at Jarrod. “It concerns me that he might have an owner and already have a name.”
“He’s not wearing a collar. So many animals get thrown away, dropped off on the road and abandoned. I have a feeling you’re looking at one of them. Doc’s going to let you know if anyone comes in and asks about a dog meeting Duce’s description, though.”
She studied Duce, his deep eyes locked on hers. “What if I get attached—no, I’m not going to think about that.” She gave her dog one more affectionate rub and stood up.” The dog’s tail thumped softly on the linoleum and Cassidy smiled gently. She was so glad to see a little life in the dog’s dark eyes. “I just need to give him my love for now, and if his owner shows up grateful that he’s alive, well, then that’ll be good.”
Cassidy couldn’t think about the repercussions of giving her love to someone or something and having it not matter in the end. When it came to her stepparents, she’d learned very quickly to harden her heart and not let any kind gesture or overture they made matter. Because the minute she let them in and started to care, they were gone and she didn’t matter to them anymore. She looked at Jarrod and saw compassion in his eyes. She almost believed he’d read her thoughts.
Then again, he had always been able to know when she was vulnerable. And he’d always teased a smile from her when she was younger. She smiled now, hoping to hide some of her fears from him.
“So do you want to see the lambs?”
He smiled again. “I thought you’d never ask.”
Jarrod looked at Cassidy and felt his heartbeat slam against his chest. He had an overpowering desire to pull her into his arms and hang on. Forcing himself to pull back from watching her with the pup, he berated himself for his foolishness. And he asked himself once again how he could fix it.
He’d run scared as a young cowboy. But now, all this time he’d done what he’d had to do, what he felt was his duty toward his family. Striving to make sure the ranch was what it needed to be. Trying to make up for what his father had done to Pops in nearly losing the ranch. But now looking at Cassidy, all he could think about was that life was passing him by and he wanted a life.
He wanted what his brothers had found. He wanted someone to share the ranch with. He wanted a wife to love so they could enjoy the ranch together with their children just as Pops had envisioned. And all these years, ever since he’d walked away from Cassidy, he’d never once felt anything that had scared him like that. Looking at her now, the gentleness she had with the puppy and the lambs, he—
Whoa. He halted his thoughts in their tracks. What was he doing? After she’d been through so much with her parents and their multiple divorces, after all the shipping here and there, after the brokenness that her life had been? And after she’d married this guy, this jerk, who had done the same thing to her, divorcing her?
He needed to find out what the guy did to put that pain in her beautiful green eyes. What did he do to make her closed off to the thought of romance? Jarrod hated that she was closing that door. And he was at a loss as to how to stop her from doing it.
“It’s hard getting attached to something only to have it taken away.” He was concerned by Cassidy’s words. As he looked at her and Duce, Jarrod said a prayer right there that no one would claim her dog. At least she was opening her heart up to a pet.
“Everything will be fine.”
He hoped so.
Before they reached the pen she was smiling.
“Aren’t they just adorable?” She handed him a bottle. “I’ll let you help me feed them.”
He took the bottle. She was adorable. “Pretty adorable.”
“I am really thrilled to have them here.” She opened the gate and they entered the pen. The babies were still clumsy as they romped together in the corner. The moment they spotted Cassidy, they came dancing her way. They looked downright gleeful as they reached her.
She sank to the ground and welcomed them into her arms, letting them climb onto her lap. She cuddled them and looked up at him.
“Have you ever seen anything so perfect?”
“Nope,” he said honestly. “Nothing. And the lambs are cute too.” Her eyes widened and he realized he’d actually said that out loud. “I’m just telling it like I see it.”
“Thank you,” she said faintly, nuzzling the lambs. One of the lambs jumped up and pressed its nose into her cheek, and she bubbled with laughter. She pulled him down and gave both lambs gentle head scrubs. “Okay, my little ones, it’s breakfast time. You feed Percy and I’ll feed Petunia.”
He crouched down, took the soft ball of wool into his arms, and nudged its mouth with the bottle. It latched on instantly. “Are you sure this is a little lamb and not a little pig?”
She laughed. “Petunia is the same way. There isn’t anything wrong with their appetites.”
Jarrod had to hold the lamb back when he started getting aggressive with the bottle toward the end. He kept getting distracted by Cassidy’s laughter as she struggled a little with Petunia.
When the bottles were empty, he set Percy on his feet and watched him greet Petunia as Cassidy set her on her feet. They nudged each other and then curled up on the hay, content to take a nap together.
“They have the life, don’t they?” Cassidy stood up.
Jarrod took her elbow and helped her when he realized she was struggling. “Is your hip giving you a lot of trouble?”
“It’s hurting, but it gets better every day.”
He opened the gate and they walked out into the yard. She walked beside him.
“How’s it going? This plan of yours?”
“Slow.” She laughed. “I have a lot to do, but I’m making up ground a little every day. I just have to remind myself that gardens don’t grow overnight, nor do bed-and-breakfasts. Now that I’ve cleared out some space, I can start working more in the orchard and till my garden so the ground begins to get ready for my strawberries in a
few months.” She rolled her eyes. “And I’m about to start painting inside and will need to set up that time for you to come out and inspect it.”
“I can do that anytime. I could do it now if you wanted me to.”
“No, I’ll let you know.”
“Sounds good. You’re getting closer to being in business.”
“Thanks. I have to admit it all makes me a little nervous.” She wrapped her arms around her waist. “I need to make this work.”
“Financially?” He didn’t want to pry and she might not say, but he’d wondered about the profit a small-town bed-and-breakfast could make. The peach orchard and strawberry business would be seasonal, and he could only imagine that had as many variables to it as the cattle business. She was driving an old truck and she wasn’t hiring help. That all added up to make him wonder if she was struggling already, although she’d said she was looking to hire someone to mow. So what did he know? She might drive that old truck for a reason that was none of his business.
She ran the toe of her sandal in the dirt. “Yes, actually. I have funds, but, well, you know without profit funds run out.” She gave a small smile and then waved it off. “It’s going to be fine. I don’t need this place to be a gold mine and never thought it would be. I can make it on a shoestring budget if I have to. But I need it to be a success for me.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve never done anything on my own. I never went to college. I was working as a teller at a bank when I met Jack. I’ve never really even thought about what I wanted out of life. I plan to start an online business with jams and other specialty items once I get everything up and running too. It just takes time. But I”—she looked wistful for a moment—“I know I want the people who come here to enjoy the place too. That’s a priority. It will be awhile before I have any visitors. I know that, but I guess as I get closer to knowing I’m actually going to be able to do this it makes me nervous.”
He wanted her to do well. She hadn’t told him how exactly her finances were or where her funds came from. Had she gotten anything in the divorce? He knew there had once been some small royalties from the same oil well that his ranch was pooled in with, but those had dwindled down to a trickle since they’d slowed production a couple of years ago. He bet it wasn’t much more than enough to maybe pay the taxes . . . maybe not even that. “They’ll be happy. You’re building a great atmosphere.” He studied her and she gave him a smile.
“Thanks. It’s going to work.” She sounded reassured.
“You know, I know it’s not exactly the same thing, but I feel that way about the ranch. Pops did an amazing job building the Four of Hearts. He just had a talent for it. I don’t know if you’ve heard what my dad did, but he put the ranch in jeopardy before he died.”
“I heard a little about his nearly gambling it away.”
“It’s been a mess. Tru, Bo, and I have worked really hard to keep it safe, and it will carry on the legacy to everyone’s children like Pops had always dreamed. But my part of that is the actual ranch management. Pops taught me everything I know, and now it’s my shot to make it bigger and better and to make him proud.” He’d never told anyone this.
She studied him thoughtfully. “You feel the pressure of that, don’t you?”
“Yeah, I do. I’m dealing with some pretty hard feelings toward my dad, but I’m up for it. He put this in my lap and fixing what he nearly destroyed drives me. Like you wanting to do something for yourself. You need to do it, for yourself.”
“Yes, I do.” Her expression grew earnest but her eyes hardened. “I have dealt with some pretty harsh emotions the last two years—truthfully, over the last six years. I realized early on that my marriage wasn’t what it should have been. But it wasn’t until the last couple of years that I knew how wrong it was. I was just treading water, trying to deny that my marriage was a sham. Jack didn’t want me. You get numb after a while but . . .”
The morning breeze lifted one of her curling strands of red hair and it brushed against her cheek. She batted it away, looking tense again now that they’d crossed into this new, painful territory.
“Can I ask what happened?”
“My marriage was a joke. I—” She clamped down on her lips suddenly, halting whatever she’d been about to say. “I was a fool.” Anger tensed her expression.
He leaned a hip against the door of his truck, no longer ready to leave. He wanted to pull her into his arms. He wanted to hold her and tell her that she’d obviously married an idiot. What had drawn her to the man she’d married six months after leaving here?
“I married a man who found infidelity to be exhilarating, and I think having a spouse made the game better for him. I’m not really certain. He just kept having affairs. I’d find out and he’d apologize profusely and say it would never happen again. And then . . .” She laughed harshly. “Then he’d blame me.” Her eyelids dipped over suddenly embarrassed eyes. “He might have been right even toward the end because I just didn’t care any longer. I was only holding on because I didn’t want to be like my parents.”
Jarrod’s jaw tensed as he ground his back teeth together and fought down the burning boil of anger rising inside of him. He’d suspected something along these lines because her anger was so deep. Actually hearing it was like tossing gasoline to the fire.
But she didn’t need his anger right now. She needed his reassurance. “You’re going to be all right, Cassidy. You need to believe in yourself and stick to your plan. Work it and look for every opportunity that comes to enhance it.” He paused, seeing that uncertainty in her eyes. “Your ex wasn’t just a fool. He was award winning.” Before he could stop himself, he brushed his fingers along her jaw, then drew back. “I have to go. Ranch work calls. But if you need anything, I’m right over there.”
By the time he reached his house, he was still telling himself he had stepped across the line and she was probably going to have her guard up the next time he saw her. He may have messed up royally—again.
He’d intended to tell her about the rustlers, but the conversation had gone in a different direction. He’d have to tell her, though. Her being out here alone on the side of the ranch where the cattle seemed to be disappearing made it necessary for her to know there were thieves roaming around. She needed to keep her eyes open.
His phone dinged as a text message came through. Maggie was reminding him that everyone was having dinner with Pops the next night before she and Tru left for a clinic Tru was holding. She wanted to make sure he knew she was inviting Cassidy too.
He smiled. Perfect.
15
After Jarrod left, Cassidy went in and checked on Duce. He was such a sweet dog. A little out of it, but he wagged his tail when she came into the room. Crouching down, she ran her hand over his coat and the network of stitches. The hog had torn up the poor animal, which made her certain she didn’t want to run into one herself. She’d seen pictures of some of their tusks and it wasn’t a pretty sight.
“I tell you, Duce, that hog got you good, didn’t he?” Duce wagged his tail and lifted one ear as he watched her. “And Jarrod is going to take these out. That fascinates me.” She examined the stitches more closely.
She wanted to go work in the peach orchard, but she hated to leave Duce alone. She also knew she had to get the peaches in but she hadn’t hired any help yet. She had better get busy. “Okay, I have to go for a couple of hours. You just lie here and chill out.”
Feeling bad, she grabbed a couple of bottles of water and went outside into the morning heat. Her tools were still in the bed of the truck so there was nothing to load, and within seconds she was bumping along through the pasture.
Every time she drove to the orchard she thought of Jarrod. He’d caressed her cheek.
She’d tried to ignore it. But that was useless. So she’d tried to ignore that his touch had set her world spinning. Before she got out of the cab, her cell phone rang. It was Maggie.
“Hey,” she said. “Given
any good advice today?” She smiled, knowing Maggie had said yesterday that she had her weekly syndicated advice column to write today for the Houston Tribune. People all across the nation read her column looking for relationship advice and inspiration—just like she’d done.
“Oh, I hope so. Someone has written in a second time, and, well, I feel like it’s a very important letter. I’m praying I’m giving sound advice. I’m a little worried, but that’s where I have to trust my instincts. And the Lord.”
“It sounds like a lot on your shoulders.”
Maggie sighed. “Sometimes. But I love it, and I always remind them that this is just me as a friend, that I’m not a professional.”
“I think they know that.” Cassidy understood. When she’d been struggling with her marriage and her problems, she’d almost written to Maggie’s advice column herself and asked for advice. She hadn’t had a friend she wanted to confide in and she really needed one. All of her friends were “their” friends, and in truth, when she thought back on it, she realized she’d been pretty isolated at times. Jack “worked” late so much that she stayed home most of the time. What was the use of talking to anyone, anyway?
“I just want to help. But anyway, why I called . . . Everyone can be here tomorrow night, so we want to invite you for dinner finally. Will that work? We leave the next morning for three days and then we’ll be back for the Fourth, but it’ll be hard to know everyone’s schedules that weekend and I don’t want to put off having you over another week. Please say you can come.”
Cassidy laughed. “I’ll come. I can’t wait.”
“Great! We are so excited. Around six. Nothing elaborate, just dinner and company.”
“Sounds good. I’ll bring some peaches.”
“Oh yay. Do you have a lot?”
“It looks like plenty, with more on the way.”
“You be careful out there by yourself.” Maggie sounded worried.
“I’m fine. I better get busy. See you tomorrow.” She was smiling as she pocketed her phone and pulled her tailgate open. She pulled the large wash bucket she’d found in the barn to the edge of the truck bed and left it there, then grabbed one of the smaller red buckets and strode to the first tree.
Kissed by a Cowboy Page 12