by Soraya Lane
* * *
“You weren’t joking about the pain part.” Tanner grimaced, gritting his teeth as Lauren pushed hard into his muscle, her table set out on the sand. “I recall massages being pleasant, not excruciating.”
She didn’t look up, her concentration absolute. “It’s not meant to feel good, it’s meant to help.”
Tanner suffered in silence, resisting the urge to groan or push her the hell away from his body.
“We’ve got a lot to work through,” Lauren said matter-of-factly. “Just to make sure I get this right, you had an ankle fracture, broken ribs, crushed knee ligaments, horn piercings, wrist damage, a bad concussion, but no spinal damage, correct?”
He gasped as she pushed into a sore spot. Motherfucker! “Yeah, I don’t think you missed anything.” His breath was wheezing in and out as he tried to cope with the pain.
“Do you like swimming?”
Why the hell was she asking him that when she already knew the answer? Lauren paused and looked up, and he stared straight back at her until her neck and cheeks turned deep red.
“Ah, sorry. I forgot who I was working on. Forget it.”
They’d swum together in Hawaii, they’d swum in the river on the ranch, splashing each other and fooling around in the water when the temperature had driven any sane person crazy. He had plenty of memories of her skin, her slick and wet body dripping all over his.
“I’ll finish up soon. I don’t want to do too much on day one.” Lauren pushed harder, and he thought his thigh was going to explode. “You’re doing great. After this you can rest a bit, then before lunch we can take a nice long swim. It’ll be good cardio for you and gentle on your joints and muscles.”
“Are you swimming with me?” he grunted.
“Ha, you mean to make sure you don’t drown?”
“Yeah, something like that.”
She pushed again, the pressure far from enjoyable still, but if it was good for him, then he wasn’t going to complain. He leaned back, pleased that he was at least lying by the ocean instead of being treated in a medical environment. He needed to focus on the water, imagine the feeling of the cool liquid on his skin once she was done.
“Sorry, I need to go a little higher here before I finish,” Lauren said.
Tanner fought the urge to stiffen as her warm, soft hands moved up his leg, skimming his inside thigh as she refocused on his muscle and started to push deep, in circles then holding her pressure.
Holy hell. He stared up at the sky, wishing she wouldn’t touch him there. Nerve endings seemed to find their way to the surface of his skin and he moved, trying not to squirm. What the heck was she trying to do to him?
“I don’t think—”
Her hands went higher, closer to his hip, which is what he guessed she was actually working on, but her long ponytail came closer too as she bent her head, her hair brushing against his skin. Tanner tried to think about his granny, then he focused on horses, then he … dammit. Blood was flowing into the wrong part of his goddamn body.
“I think we need to call it a day,” he said, muttering as he tried unsuccessfully to push Lauren’s hand away.
“What? No, I’m just getting…”
Tanner didn’t bother saying anything else. Lauren could see exactly what she’d so expertly stimulated through his shorts.
“Oh.”
He grunted. “Yeah. Oh.”
“Maybe we could resume this later or you could roll onto your stomach,” she suggested. “It’s only natural and to be honest with you, it’s not really that unusual.”
“So it’s not unusual for your clients to get hard-ons, is that what you’re saying?” Talk about embarrassed—his body was behaving like a teenager’s!
Lauren looked mortified, her face like she’d seen a ghost, but when he cracked up she did too. “Tanner! I’m just saying that sometimes when my hand is on a man’s skin…”
“He gets a goddamn erection,” Tanner finished for her. “Yeah, I don’t need it spelled out for me, it’s bad enough experiencing it.”
Lauren surprised him by slapping his leg and pointing at him sternly. “Turn over and flatten it, or lie on your side—just don’t point it at me.”
Tanner couldn’t help his laughter as he turned over, happy to comply if it meant she’d leave his upper thigh and groin area the hell alone.
“Funny, I remember you liking when I pointed it at you.” He couldn’t resist the taunt, not when she was torturing him so expertly.
“Shut up and lie still,” she replied. “Or I’ll make this massage even deeper and you’ll be begging for mercy.”
Tanner shut the hell up and did what he was told, not wanting to know how much worse it could get. The sooner this damn massage was over, the better, because he couldn’t decide what was worse—her hands or the pain.
* * *
Lauren had had men get stimulated when she was working on them before. Not often, but over the course of her career it had happened enough that she knew how to ignore it and brush it off. It was just blood flow. It was a natural reaction to having a woman’s hands rubbing and pushing against their skin. It didn’t mean anything and she was always careful to either ignore it or suggest the patient roll over or take a break or something. But with Tanner? Oh, with Tanner it was an entirely different ball game. Because she’d seen Tanner naked. She’d felt Tanner naked. She’d dreamed for years about Tanner naked. And now here he was, in his briefs, with a white towel over him, and all she could think about was how much she’d like to explore that body of his in completely unprofessional ways.
She remembered their songs, what they’d listened to out in the open lying under the big oak tree near the river; she could shut her eyes and feel and see and remember what it had been like. Just like she could remember what his hands had felt like on her and how warm and soft his mouth had been against hers. Those feelings were indented in her memory and she’d never forget them, because no one else had ever made her feel quite the same as Tanner had. Now he was all grown up, and probably a whole lot more experienced, and she couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like between the sheets with him now.
She gulped, trying to focus on the job at hand.
“I’m, ah, going to have to tape you up,” she said. “But I think we’ll wait until after your swim.”
“That’s not exactly going to help my full body tan,” Tanner replied.
Lauren swatted at him playfully before she could stop herself. “Stop teasing, this is serious.”
“Says the woman teasing me with every damn touch.”
Lauren’s hands hovered—she almost stopped, but she pushed on. She was doing her job, she just needed to forget that the man whose strong, hard skin she was touching was Tanner.
She worked in silence a bit longer, holding the pressure and knowing it was hurting him. But when he finally spoke there was nothing to suggest he was in pain.
“I know it’s ancient history, and it’s not going to change anything, but can I ask you why?” Tanner’s voice was low. “I’ve never believed you that you wanted some space, that you were too young. I guess I’ve just always wondered what made you call time on us.”
She released the pressure but left her hand on his leg. “You’re right, Tanner, it is ancient history. There’s no point going back in time.”
He half turned and she could see how stormy his eyes were, how different they looked from the always-dancing ones she remembered. “Because you can’t remember? Or because I’m right, that it was something else?”
She fixed her smile, refused to crack even under his scrutiny. “Because there’s no point going back. Simple as that.” Lauren sucked in a breath. “Now how about we have that swim?”
Tanner kept watching her, before dropping the towel and standing up. “Christ! I’m worse now than before you started.”
She stood alongside him and reached out a hand to touch his arm, but he pulled away before she had a chance to do more than brush her fingers aga
inst his skin. Funny, before she’d been touching him repeatedly, but now, as she reached for him, it felt like she hadn’t touched him in a lifetime.
“It’s supposed to be sore. We have a long road ahead of us.”
Tanner made a noise deep in his throat that she couldn’t decipher before hobbling into the house, leaving her standing there. What was she supposed to do? Was she supposed to put her feelings aside and pretend like calling time on their relationship hadn’t ripped her heart out and left her gasping for air for weeks, months, longer? Because she wasn’t sure if she’d gotten over Tanner yet, even more than ten years later, so what the hell was she supposed to say to him when he acted like she hadn’t given a damn? She might have acted like a prize bitch at the time, but her hand had been forced. She’d had to make a choice, and she’d made the only one she could.
Tanner appeared again, but he didn’t give her a second glance. Instead he pushed off from the side of the pool and dived straight in, sending an arc of water at her, splashing her toes. His big body pushed through the water, slicing across it as he swam powerfully to the other end.
Lauren clapped when his head emerged, hair slicked and looking even longer than it had before. “Impressive. Maybe your body’s not as damaged as I thought.”
It was only then that she saw the ripple of pain pass through his face as he reached for the edge of the pool, gasping, before slipping back down below the surface again.
“Tanner!” she screamed, running the few steps between the deck and the edge of the pool and leaping in, swimming quickly to where he was. “Tanner!”
“Fuck, my leg, it’s…”
She hooked an arm under his and started to tread water as she reached for the edge. “Just take it easy.”
“I’m not going to drown,” he ground out. “I’m just goddamn sore. The side of my leg just exploded in heat, like it was on fire. And the cramp in my calf is—dammit!”
Lauren took a breath and ducked under the surface, pushing down as far as she could, and reached for his leg. She pushed his heel down, holding on to his toes, and rubbing his tight muscles. She stayed below as long as she could, and just as she was about to come up for air a strong arm wrapped around her and hauled her up to the surface.
She gasped when she came up, sucking back air and blinking water from her lashes. She pushed her wet hair off her face, and when she went to open her mouth she realized she was less than an inch from Tanner, and that he was staring down at her, his eyes on hers. She touched a hand to his chest.
“Are you okay now? How are you feeling?”
“No, I’m not okay. I’m so far from fucking okay that it’s ridiculous.”
She stared back at him. She needed to push away. Her hand was still on his chest. She just needed to push back.
Tanner grabbed her wrist, his gaze dropping to her mouth.
“Is it your leg? I can—”
“This doesn’t mean I’ve forgiven you,” he growled out.
“What—”
Tanner’s mouth closed over hers in a searing kiss before she had time to react, his hand letting go of her wrist and moving around her, pressed to the small of her back and pulling her straight into that rock solid chest of his.
* * *
What the hell was he doing? Tanner stroked his hand possessively down Lauren’s back, pressing against her so she moved closer to him. Her lips were wet and soft as he kissed her, and he tangled one hand in her wet hair as he kissed her again. Pain shot up his leg but he didn’t stop, put up with it so he could keep moving his mouth against hers. Maybe it had been the touching before or the heat or the—hell, he didn’t know why, all he knew was that it felt so damn good.
“Stop,” she whispered, her hand rising between them, fingertips settling just below his collarbone.
“Why?” He leaned forward to touch his lips to hers again, needing his mouth against hers, craving the taste of her, the feel of her against him.
“You just need to stop,” she said, softly this time but not quite a whisper. “We can’t do this.”
Tanner pulled back, clearing his throat and dropping his hand from her back. His leg hurt like crazy again all of a sudden, although maybe it was because he’d been good at ignoring it when he was distracted.
“You should get out and rest that leg,” she told him, treading water as she moved away. “Or we could do a few laps together. Just take it slow.”
Tanner dragged his eyes from her, thinking how much he’d like to swim to her, wrap his arms around her, and show her exactly what she’d been missing all these years. But since he couldn’t do that, then maybe swimming was a good distraction.
“Yeah, let’s swim,” he grunted out.
Lauren moved into place beside him and started to do the breaststroke. “Just move through the water however feels best for you. I want to keep everything very low impact today, we have plenty of time to build up slowly.”
Build up slowly? Maybe there was hope for him after all. Because if that kiss was a sign of things to come, then perhaps his time away with Lauren wouldn’t be tedious after all.
Chapter 8
“TANNER, can we talk about what happened before?”
Tanner opened his eyes. He was lying beneath a coconut tree on the grass between the beach and their house, and until that moment his only concern was whether a coconut might fall on his head. But this kind of conversation was worse. He decided to keep his eyes shut and pretend he was asleep.
“Tanner?”
He groaned and rolled to his side. “How about we forget it ever happened?”
“It’s not that easy.”
Yeah, he was well aware of that. The only thing he’d thought of since was how damn good her lips had felt, all pillowy and melted into his. Her skin was so soft, her fingertips so light when they’d pressed into his skin. For the past few hours, he’d tried to relax, tried to ignore the aches in his body, and attempt to put Lauren out of his head. All he’d succeeded in doing was thinking about every inch of her instead.
“It’s complicated between us,” she said, moving closer. He looked sideways and saw her shuffling over, toes buried into the perfect white sand as she stared at him. “I don’t know why I thought we’d be able to do this.”
“You want out?” he asked, finally pushing himself up so he could look at her properly.
“Honestly? I don’t know. I mean I want to help you, but even after all this time, it’s just…”
“Complicated,” he said. “I know.”
They sat there a bit longer, him looking at her and her looking out at the ocean. He studied her profile, admiring her features. She was beautiful sitting beside him without makeup on, her face a slightly lighter shade than her arms. She was wearing sunglasses so he couldn’t see her eyes, but the way she had her long dark hair scooped up into a ponytail, bottom lip sucked in beneath her top teeth, it made her look like the schoolgirl he’d known. She was more mature and she was a successful, grown-ass woman now, of course, but he could still see the girl she’d once been lingering close to the surface.
“We never were good at keeping our hands off each other,” he said, laughing at the memory. She’d always been in his lap, arms around his neck; when they walked side by side her hand was always slipped into his back pocket. They’d been joined at the hip since their first date—until the day she’d abruptly ended it.
“So this is just, what, a chemical reaction? We’re programmed to, I don’t know, behave a certain way around each other?” she asked, turning back to him.
Tanner shrugged. “Hell if I know,” he admitted. “The only thing I know for sure is that I never wanted to see you again for as long as I lived, and now that we’re here, I’m starting to think that was pretty goddamn immature.”
Her laugh was soft, uncertain almost. “You do realize that I had only just turned eighteen when I broke up with you, right? We were kids.”
“We didn’t behave like kids and you know it.” He bristled just thinking
about it, remembering how she’d blindsided him. They’d spent so many long hours, bodies intertwined, talking about spending the rest of their lives together. There hadn’t been a cheerleader in sight who’d ever tempted him to stray from Lauren, not once. “But yeah, I know it’s childish to hold on to a grudge this long.” Only it wasn’t a grudge. He’d gone from opening up to someone for the first time in his life to having his heart ripped out. No one he’d met since, not all the women he’d been with and met over so many years, had come close to Lauren, or to the memory he had of her. Maybe that was his fault for not dealing with his shit and keeping her on a pedestal.
“Can we try not to let anything intimate happen again?” she asked. “I mean, we’re obviously attracted to each other, it’s not like a lot has changed physically over the years.”
“Except for my ninety-year-old body?” he teased as a smile crept across his lips.
“I said if you didn’t do what I told you to, then that’s what you’d end up with, stupid. Not that you’ve got one now!”
Her gaze drop lower, he could feel it even though her eyes were hard to make out through her sunglasses. Then he watched her swallow and he reached out a hand to touch her arm. He shouldn’t have, but there was some sand clinging to her skin and he carefully brushed it away.
“Tell me again that you don’t want anything to happen between us,” he said. “Because I’m not sure I believe you.”
She pulled her arm away and crossed it over her stomach. He watched as her tongue darted out to moisten her lips.
“We need to keep things professional between us,” she said, her voice low and husky. “That’s it, Tanner, no more contact.”
He lay back down and shut his eyes. “Until my next massage, that is.”
He bet she would have slapped him if she could have. But when she lay back down, her book back in her hand, he forced himself to man the hell up and stop joking around.
“Lauren, look, I know I’m not the easiest guy to be around, and I shouldn’t have been such a jerk to you before we came here.”