by Zoe York
“Lily, I got an offer.”
“What kind of offer?” Her hands stilled as she reached for her stock pot as though she was sensing something big on the horizon.
“For the restaurant.”
“It’s not for sale,” she whispered. “We have a contract.”
“We’ll take the money and you can build your own restaurant with your own menu and make it exactly like you want.”
“I’m buying Benny’s, Ethan.” Her voice was growing louder and the dishwasher looked up from his spot in the corner.
“And because you are the owner I think you should take a look at it.”
“Ethan, don’t you get it? I don’t want to sell!”
“You could earn a profit and turn around and do what you really want.”
“This is what I really want!”
“This place is stifling you and your potential. This isn’t what you dream of. Sell this old building. Find something bigger and better. Or work fewer hours as the nonowner, but still be in control as the manager and chef. Let go of the financial risk and headaches.”
Choose me. Choose having more time to spend together.
“You don’t think I can do this? Is that it?”
Ethan crossed his arms, trying to hide his frustration. “You’re not even considering this. They offered to keep you on as the head chef with a big raise.”
“And be at someone else’s mercy again. Haven’t you been listening? I don’t want to work for anyone. I want to work for me.” She jabbed her chest with a thumb.
“But this could be good.” She could go anywhere, be anyone. She could create the menus she’d dreamed of as a teen. “You don’t have to stay here. You could support your dad.”
Her grew eyes wet. “I can’t believe you’re trying to sell this place out from under me. I should have known better. I shouldn’t have trusted you.”
“Lily, come on. You know I’m not trying to do that.”
“If you don’t want me in your life, just say so.”
Ethan leaned back on his heels in surprise, and from the corner of his eye saw the dishwasher scoot out of the kitchen.
“What are you talking about?” he said gently. “I’m doing this because I do want you in my life.”
“Then why do you keep pushing me away?”
“Lily.” He struggled for patience, to react calmly, to help settle things instead of make them worse. “I’m not the man you see. I want to be but I—”
“Quit making excuses. If you don’t want me, tell me. Don’t hide behind this ‘I’m not a man’ crap. You’ve always been a man, Ethan Mattson, so stop fearing being one. You punched out Tanner, you hike up mountains, you make love like you could go for days and you do good things for others. What’s more manly than that? So quit hiding behind your fear and embrace who you are, what you have.”
“I don’t want to be a burden, okay?” he cried. “An MRI says I’m likely to end up in a wheelchair again. You don’t know what that’s like, Lily, but it’s no fun for anyone.”
She was pale as she stared at him with disappointment etched in hurt. “So instead you deny me the love of my life? Every day you push me away, insulting me by insinuating that I’m shallow enough to care about a limp, a few aches, the possibility of disability? How dare you decide who or what I want in my life.”
She spun on her heel, storming out of the kitchen. Gloria entered with a stack of dirty dishes, raised one brow and deposited her load before leaving him alone again.
Ethan leaned against the counter and let out a jagged sigh. How had he managed to mess up so badly, when all he’d wanted to do was to give Lily security and a home—the things she needed to settle down and be happy and free at long last.
Locked in her office, Lily tried to keep her tears from falling. She stared up at the ceiling, blinking. Then, realizing that Ethan could be spying on her through the camera above, she stormed off to the ladies’ room so she could be angry, frustrated and confused in peace.
Then you’ll go find your Mr. Right. Why would he say stuff like “our home,” only to follow it up with a reminder that he had no plans to hold on to her after their agreement ended?
And why would he give up a contract with Dani for her when he kept pushing her away? Was he really worried about becoming a burden or was that just an excuse? Because, in her mind, if you loved someone nothing else mattered. People you loved couldn’t be a burden. Ethan had even said as much to Gramps.
The real question was why he was taking offers on her restaurant. She shouldn’t have trusted him. She shouldn’t have mixed love and kitchens.
She splashed cold water on her face and studied herself in the cracked mirror. She looked tired, old. Defeated.
What if the restaurant failed? She’d still have to buy it, wouldn’t she?
All she wanted to do was skip out on responsibility and eat cookie dough with Mandy, or laugh with Gramps in the kitchen while she mixed up another batch of mashed potatoes.
But this was her dream. Not all days could be perfect.
That fight with Ethan, though…it had shaken her to her core. Had she overreacted?
Straightening her shoulders, she headed back to work. Sitting in the bathroom moaning about her life wasn’t going to fix things.
She left the ladies’ room and ran smack into Tanner. He was lanky as ever, a mop of hair falling over his forehead, the dimples bracketing his smile giving him a charming innocence. One she knew he didn’t possess.
“What are you doing here?” she demanded.
“Hey, babe.”
“I’m nobody’s babe and certainly not yours.”
“Let’s chat,” Tanner suggested.
“Let’s not.” She wrenched her arm from his grip, realizing they were creating a small scene that had the coffee drinking gossipers in the dining area stirring. She led her ex into the staff room.
“Why are you here? My husband made it clear I’m not interested.”
“You didn’t return my calls.” Knowledge dawned in Tanner’s expression. “You blocked my number.”
“My husband did.”
He gave a huff of a laugh. “I can’t believe you married him. Although I always knew you’d come running back to Blueberry Springs and to Ethan. That’s why I made him an offer he couldn’t refuse.”
“What does that mean?”
He smiled and opened his arms, as though showcasing the building she was supposed to own come next summer.
No. No way.
How could Ethan even dream of bringing that offer to her? Not only that, he’d given her an emotional sales pitch in his attempt to persuade her.
She couldn’t trust him. She couldn’t trust anyone. She needed out of their marriage agreement even if it meant suffering a financial fallout.
“I’m never working for you ever again,” she said to Tanner.
“I’m trying to make amends. I love you, Lily. I want to spend the royalties from my cookbook on you and show you I still care. We belong together. We had good times.”
“I’m not interested.”
“Maybe I could help out? I overheard a waitress say the fridge turns off on its own.”
“And you know how to fix that?”
He was smiling smugly. “I do.”
She didn’t know whether to believe him.
“It’s hard being the boss.” His tone was kind, soft, understanding. He was trying to draw her in, give her someone to lean on for a while. But she knew she couldn’t trust him. She couldn’t trust anyone.
“Let me help.” He began walking toward the door, no doubt ready to take over, take charge, put her in the corner again.
“No.”
He turned, eyebrows quirked.
“I said no. This is mine.”
“Lily,” he said smoothly, “I’m not going to take advantage of you. You completely misunderstood that I was trying to protect you. We loved each other and my feelings for you haven’t gone away.”
“I’m not
interested.”
“I said, let me help.”
“Please leave.”
“You can’t be serious.” Tanner was staring at her in disbelief. “My name can help you.”
“I said no.”
“You’ll regret this.”
It wasn’t quite a threat, but it made her uncomfortable just the same. “You’re right. I probably will regret it, but that seems to be a theme in my life whenever it comes to restaurants.”
If she was going to fail, she was at least going to do it on her own terms.
Chapter 12
“Did I remember to tell Lily to sleep with you?” Gramps asked, his brow furrowed in confusion. He’d had a full day of doctor’s tests and Ethan had picked him up a few hours ago, bringing him home.
“Gramps, you’re tired. I think it’s time to call it a night.” Ethan stacked their dirty dessert dishes on the counter and began ushering his grandfather toward the guestroom, wondering when Lily would come home. Since their fight she’d been avoiding him, sometimes not even coming home at night.
“I did tell her.” Gramps nodded and absently tapped the air.
“You’re a good wingman,” Ethan said automatically.
He needed to talk to her. He’d definitely had it wrong, and of course she wanted the restaurant. She loved the trials and tribulations of the place just like he did with his tech work.
He should have known better, should have listened instead of spewing out his own dream of the future. One where his likelihood of disability was out in the open.
He checked his smartwatch as a notification came in for the restaurant’s alley motion-activated camera. Maybe Lily was on her way home and they’d finally be able to sit down and talk things through, now that they’d had time to cool off.
Gramps was frowning, licking a remnant of chocolate icing off his bottom lip. “Yes. Yes, I told her if she didn’t consummate your marriage that you could annul the whole thing and she’d be out on her ear without a restaurant.”
Ethan nearly ran into the doorjamb leading out of the kitchen. “Say that again?”
“Have you seen my toothpaste? I can’t find it anywhere.”
“It’s in the bathroom beside the sink. What did you say to Lily?”
“That sounds about right.”
“Lily told you about the contract?” Why would she do that? It was risky, too risky.
“What contract? The prenuptial agreement? Oh, I figured it all out. Marriage to save taxes and what-not.”
Ethan studied his grandfather with renewed interest. He might be starting to slip a gear here and there but Gramps was still a smart man. Ethan guided him to the bathroom. “Brush your teeth first? I think you forgot last night.”
“I’m not a baby. I can choose whether or not to brush.”
“That’s true,” he replied mildly. But inside, his world was dropping out. He and Lily had made love and it had been wonderful. Then she’d pulled back. He’d had a million excuses in mind as to why, but maybe she’d taken him to bed as a way to protect her interests and nothing more. But how could she fear that he, her old childhood friend and protector, would take advantage of a loophole he wasn’t even certain existed?
And then the offer on the restaurant... She’d acted like he’d been trying to swipe the whole thing out from under her.
What was going on inside her head? And how could he show her he wasn’t the man she was assuming he was?
Then again, maybe it was exactly like she’d said and she only wanted the restaurant.
Not him.
Lily walked into the bedroom to find Ethan already sprawled out on the bed, gazing at her. She was exhausted and didn’t want to sleep on the futon in his office. She wanted a real bed, one without her husband in it.
Without the man she’d trusted to always have her back.
She put her hands on her hips and waited. Usually he asked if she wanted the bed and would make the move. Tonight he did not.
She heaved a sigh and snatched up her pajamas.
“We need to talk,” he said quietly.
“About what?” she snapped. “The fact that the offer you almost accepted on my restaurant was from my ex-boyfriend? How about we start with that.”
“What?” Ethan looked momentarily confused.
“Give me some respect. You know who the offer was from and still took it to me.” Ethan was shaking his head. “You may have acted as though you cared, but you always planned to double-cross me.”
“Whoa.” He stood up, hands out, his face a mask of anger. “You slept with me to ensure I couldn’t get an annulment, so let’s be fair about where we point fingers.”
“I’m not going to let you screw me over.”
“Screw you over? I was stupid enough to think you actually wanted me. We had a commitment to each other and I have never once let you down.”
Doubt was nibbling at the cornerstones of Lily’s argument. She wanted to trust him. She really did. But she also knew she couldn’t continue on with these kinds of thoughts always piping up in the back of her mind. She needed to be the full owner, even if it meant financial hardship as she renegotiated new deals with vendors.
“You said whenever I wanted out of the marriage, I could get out. I think it’s time.”
He was staring at her, stunned. “But you—”
“I’ll deal with the suppliers and hope their new discounts are deep enough I can keep things afloat on my own.”
He sat on the bed, no longer looking her way.
“Ethan…” She felt tears well up. She’d made the wrong decision. “You knew this day would come. I have to protect my interests.”
“If two months is enough, then fine. I’ll talk to John about drawing up divorce papers.” He stood, his voice calm, his face revealing that he was anything but calm on the inside.
Ethan couldn’t concentrate. He stared at his computer screen, the blinking cursor taunting him.
Lily wanted a divorce.
A few hours ago he’d moved Gramps into the old folks’ home, a spot opening up last night.
Lily hadn’t come home last night. He was starting to believe tonight would be the same story. Even Igor hadn’t come home yet.
His old, quiet life—the one he’d once cherished—had returned to him, only he no longer wanted it. He didn’t want a silent, empty house. He wanted family. He wanted someone in the other room cooking or reading the same paper over and over again.
He’d failed to make Lily feel as though she was safe and belonged in his life. And now she was going to own the restaurant prematurely and possibly struggle financially because he’d messed up.
His phone rang and he picked it up. “What do you want?” he snapped, annoyed that someone was interrupting his pity party. He didn’t have them often, but when he did, he liked to have them alone.
There was silence on the other end of the line. He hung up and moments later his computer screen flashed to a video chat app, ringing filling the room once again. It was Dani.
Great. She must have finally received his canceled contract and refund.
He clicked the accept button and his ex-fiancée’s smiling face filled the monitor.
“Hello.” He aimed for polite, but knew he fell a bit short.
Just because his wife had seen the truth―that he was a crusty, difficult man sure to become a burden―it didn’t mean he needed to tick off a woman who’d already seen that truth so many years earlier. A woman who could possibly send work his way in the future, seeing as he no longer had a wife running interference.
Dani laughed uncertainly. “Ethan? How are you?”
“Sorry to have terminated our contract on such short notice. I assume you got the deposit back and saw my referral to a friend who can finish the project?”
He’d been so close to completion it broke his heart having to give it up. But it had been the right thing to do even though it hadn’t helped save his marriage. He’d been focusing on the wrong thing, evidently.
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“Was it something I did?” Dani seemed earnest, as well as disappointed.
“No, no. Unavoidable time commitments. But Darrel can complete the sites.” His cursor hovered over the red button that would end the call.
“You should have kept the deposit. You did most of the work.”
“It was nice working with you. A fun challenge. Maybe in the future we can work together again.”
“Is this about Lily?” Dani gave a small shake of her head, sending her hair waving. “Never mind, I know the answer. She’s smart.” She was sitting forward, watching him through their screens.
He wasn’t sure what she meant, but suspected she knew why he’d canceled the contract.
“I was making a play for you, Ethan.” Dani gave a small laugh, acting flirtatious. She batted her lashes and gave him a shy smile. “But you didn’t even notice, because you’re so in love with her. I’m guessing she knew.”
Ethan scratched the back of his neck, feeling uncomfortable. Had Dani truly been making a play? He’d assumed she was just being her usual flirty self and had offered a ridiculous sum of cash for the site because…well, he’d assumed she’d wanted to appease her guilt, buy his forgiveness.
Her making a play for him didn’t make sense, though. She’d left him quite soundly.
Dani laughed again. This time for real. “You should see your face.”
“I’m sorry, Dani. That ship has sailed,” he said awkwardly. She was already back in Milan for a photo shoot or conference, or else something vital to her superficial world where everything was perfect. She wanted a career, not love. At least not love with a man who couldn’t physically keep up to her lifestyle.
Just like Lily.
“You can’t blame a girl for trying. It was selfish of me to leave you when you needed me the most.”
He watched her through the screen. She seemed genuine and he sat back, thinking. He’d never expected her to apologize, and he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say in reply.
She gave that same uncertain laugh again. “I’ve always felt bad for the way I left you. You’re a good man and I should have stayed by your side.”