by Jenika Snow
Her childhood hadn’t been horrible, but it had been average and lonely. Her parents had been focused on their work, and because of that she’d had to entertain herself most of the time. And then they’d divorced when she’d become an adult. Her father and mother had gone their separate ways, and that included across the ocean, and only speaking to her once a year.
But when she got with William, a man her parents hadn’t cared for, she should have known then that he was wrong for her. Her parents hadn’t been involved in her life that much when she grew up, and especially not toward the men she dated. But when she said she loved him, would stay with him despite what they wanted, and that she’d gotten pregnant, they’d pretty much cut contact with her. It had been years since she’d spoken to her parents, and they’d never even seen Braden. But her life was better off without them if they would completely disregard her and her son—their grandchild—because of a mistake she was paying dearly for now.
But she couldn’t lie and say that at times like this she wished her mom and dad were closer, and that Jana could talk to them and tell them that she just wanted to have them in her life.
Bobbie moved closer and sat on the floor. “What do you mean find a place for you and Braden?” She sounded genuinely confused.
“Bobbie, as much as I love you, and know that without you in my life everything would be even more screwed, Braden and I have to leave eventually.”
Bobbie shook her head. “You don’t. We can make this work.”
Jana snorted, and Bobbie smiled. “This place is barely big enough for you, let alone me and Braden.”
There was a moment of silence before Bobbie spoke again. “I like having Braden here, and having you here two makes the place feel … warm, and not so alone.”
Her heart hurt at Bobbie’s words. Yeah, she’d only been here staying with Bobbie few days, and enjoying that she could actually be here thanks to Tuck, but the truth was Bobbie had her own life she needed to live.
“After all that shit with William…” Bobbie took a deep breath. “I don’t want you to leave here or River Run, and I know you’ve thought about it.”
Jana was silent for a moment, just let what Bobbie said move through her, and she knew that she didn’t want to leave town, or all the people she’d come to care about in this town. She cared about Bobbie, loved her like a sister, and she was falling for Tuck. She wanted to tell him how she felt, that she wanted to be with him, wanted him in her and Braden’s life, but she was a little afraid at how he’d react, or if he’d want that, too.
“What about Tuck?” Bobbie asked softly.
Jana looked up, realizing she’d been looking at her hands as she twisted her fingers together. “Tuck?”
Bobbie smiled softly. “I know he must have feelings for you, pretty hardcore ones because he went all badass to get you, but what about you?”
Jana swallowed. “What about me?”
“Jana, you can talk to me,” Bobbie placed her hand on Jana’s thigh. “I’ll always be here for you.”
“I know, and I love you for that.” She placed her hand on top of Bobbie’s. “Honestly, I am so confused on how I feel. I mean, he intrigued me before everything happened, but then when he came for me…” She swallowed again, her throat so dry. “He was so intense, not caring what lives he took in order to get me back.”
Bobbie nodded. “Those men—hard ass bikers that don’t give a shit about anything that they don’t care about—will do whatever it takes to make sure their loved ones are cared for, Jana. Tuck cares for you, that’s plain to see.”
Jana nodded, knowing that was the truth.
“They are ruthless, Jana, and I mean that in only the best way, because when the time calls for violence to get the job done that is the type of man you want on your side.”
“I know, and I think that’s what I like most about Tuck, what drew me to him the most.” Jana started thinking hard about Tuck, about how she wished things could be easier in life. “I want him for myself, want him in Braden’s life, because I know deep down he’s a good man, a devoted and protective man.” She thought about their kiss, her lips still tingling. They’d shared a lot in that short time right before Bobbie had come for her, but did he really want to be strapped with her and a child that wasn’t his?
Bobbie smiled wider. “Talk to him, tell him that. I can see that he’s made a deep impact in your life, even before he went after you.”
Just then the doorbell rang, alerting them that their pizza was there. She’d talk to Tuck, and hope that the passion and heat that had been between them back at his place, and during the kiss they’d shared, would still be as powerful when she laid herself totally bare.
Chapter Twelve
Tuck walked into the clubhouse, his body calm, still, even if right now shit was about to get real. When Lucien had called him he’d waited a few minutes, just enjoyed the calm before the storm.
The club was empty right now, all the prospects and sweet-butts missing, and Tuck knew it was because of this serious meeting. He walked into the room, saw all the patched-in brothers sitting at the table, their focus on him, and he made his way over to his seat. Once he was sitting down he leaned back and looked at his cut that sat in front of Lucien, patch side up. If he was voted out of the club they’d strip his patch from his cut, burn his leather, and then they’d black out the Brothers ink on his body. It was all a rite of exit, just like there was a rite of passage to be in the club.
“You were asked here today because the club’s come to a decision regarding sending you off or letting you stay,” Lucien said, his voice void of emotion and his focus trained right on Tuck.
Tuck nodded, not going to speak until it was time to either embrace his family in the club, or say goodbye one last time.
“Have you prepared for what the club’s voted on?” Lucien asked.
Tuck looked at each of the club member starting with Malice. He’d known the Sergeant at Arms for a long time, would die for him just like every brother in this room right now. He looked at Kink next, a man that had put his life on the line several times for Tuck. Then there were Rook and Ruin, both men like opposites of each other, but willing to do anything to help a member out. Then their newest patched-in brother, Pierce. He was the humor of the club, but when they needed muscle he laid it down without complaint. When Tuck looked at Lucien, a man that was like a brother, a father, and meant a hell of a lot to him, pain lanced through his heart. He might never see these men again, and that hurt. But despite his betrayal he also knew protecting Jana had been worth anything that was thrown at him as a repercussion. He’d done something to save the life of the woman he cared about, the woman he … loved.
He loved Jana, and when she was ready to come back to him, to let him show her that he wanted her and Braden in his life, he’d tell her how much he fucking loved her.
The silence in the room stretched, and when Lucien took a deep breath he glanced back at the club’s president.
“Do you have anything you want to say before the ruling is given?” Lucien said, and leaned forward.
Tuck looked at the men again, then back at his president. He took a steadying breath. “I respect whatever you’ve decided, but know that I did what I had to, and would do it again if it meant that it saved the life of a person under the protection of the club.” He clenched his hands into fists. “I love Jana, want her as my old lady, and I’d lay my life down for her in an instant if it meant she was okay and Braden was protected.”
Lucien nodded, then exhaled. “We want you with us, brother, but what you did was against the club.”
“I know what I did was a betrayal…”
“But we want you in this club, a part of this family.”
Tuck breathed out roughly, not realizing he’d been holding his breath. “I want that, too.”
“But you can’t just get off without becoming even with the club, righting the wrong you did. You know this.”
Tuck clenched his jaw, alread
y knowing what Lucien was going to say.
“We don’t want you out of the club, and taking you out isn’t an option, but you have to pay, brother.”
“I understand,” Tuck said.
“You have to pay with blood, flesh, Tuck.” Malice was the one to speak now.
“You have to offer up a Straight,” Kink said after Malice.
A straight: making a wrong a right in the club.
“I’ll do what needs done. I’m here for you all, here for this club.”
“But you’ll also be under lock for a time, Tuck.”
Tuck nodded. “I know, brothers, and for that I do apologize.”
“You’ve been in this life with us too damn long for us to throw this away, to just toss you out.” Lucien slid Tuck’s cut over to him, and placed a hand on Tuck’s. “You’ve always been loyal, taken care of what needs to be done, but we have to be on the same page, man. We have to work together, and we have to know that you’ll never go against the club again.” Lucien rested his forearms on the counter. “You have to talk to us, let us help if something happens. Understand?”
Tuck placed his hand over Lucien’s stared at the other man, and nodded. “I understand.” They’d work through this, they had to, and Tuck would make it right with the club and concerning M.
“We’ll discuss doing the Straight, but we have other business to attend right now,” Lucien said and leaned back in his chair. “We’re going to need your help fining that sex-trafficking ring, because we’re taking those fuckers down.”
****
Jana didn’t know why she was so nervous as she pulled into Tuck’s driveway. Her car had been at Bobbie’s when she’d gotten over there, courtesy of the club. Just knowing that the members of the Brothers of Menace had the intention of finding her and bringing her back, even if Tuck had gone all commando and found her himself, had her knowing in her heart this town was where she and Braden were meant to be.
She turned off the car and sat there for a moment. She saw Tuck’s Harley and truck in the driveway, but couldn’t see any movement inside. The house was pretty rundown, but she assumed that when a man spent most of his life at a clubhouse with other bikers, a home outside of that wasn’t a necessity.
Climbing out of the car and clenching the keys in her hand, she walked up the gravel driveway and toward the front door. Lifting her hand to bring her knuckles down on the scarred wood, she didn’t have time to knock before the door was pulled open and Tuck stood on the other side.
He was barefoot, even his feet masculine. She lifted her gaze up his legs, over his stained, torn jeans, and continued up his equally grease-stained white t-shirt. He had on his leather Brothers cut, and that sight had a smile covering her face. She was so glad things had worked out with his club, so happy that she hadn’t been the cause of him losing something so monumental in his life.
“Jana,” he said her name softly.
The way he said it, though, had this warmth filling her. Tuck said it like he’d missed the hell out of her, like he hadn’t seen her in months, years, instead of just a couple of days.
“You look good, healing real nice.” He took a step back, and she stepped inside. The house smelled like him, like motor oil and a splash of something spicy and manly. “You came here sooner than I thought.”
She turned back around to face him, and she noticed that he’d trimmed his beard. How in the hell hadn’t she realized that when she first saw him? Maybe because you were too focused on the other parts of his body? Her cheeks heated at that thought.
“Your beard.” She smiled.
He gave her a lopsided grin and ran his hand over his cheeks. He hadn’t shaved it all off, which she was glad for. Jana liked the scruff. It made him seem more masculine, and made her feel more feminine. But it wasn’t as wild as it had been when she saw him last. He still had his longer hair tied up in a man bun, and she was glad he’d kept that as well. Jana had come to like the sight of this scruffy Tuck.
“I’ll just come out and say it.” She twisted her hands together and stared at him.
“Should I get a drink first?” He was teasing, but she did see this tightness in his expression.
She laughed a little, but it was strained as well. Taking a deep breath, she told herself that if he said being strapped down to her and Braden wasn’t what he wanted in the long run, despite what he’d said after their kiss, she’d live with it and move on. But she had hope that he hadn’t just spoken those words in the heat of the moment, that he hadn’t told her she was his and only his, and that he’d never let her go just because it had been what felt right at that moment.
“Jana, you’re killing me here, baby.” He took a step closer. “Just tell me,” he said softer this time.
“I want you to be in mine and Braden’s life, want you to be with me, Tuck.” Jana held her breath as she stared at him and waited for him to respond. “I don’t want to scare you, and I wasn’t sure if what you’d said when I’d been here had just been a spur of the moment thing because of what we’d gone through—”
He stopped her by moving close to her, grabbing the back of her neck, and kissing her until she was forced to hold onto him or she’d surely fall. He kissed her for several moments, licking at her lips, and sucking her bottom one into his mouth until pain and pleasure melded into one.
He pulled back, kept his hand on the back of her neck, and ran his thumb over her erotically bruised bottom lip. “I meant everything I said, and more, Jana baby.” His words were spoken gently, as if he were afraid she’d run from him after he said it. “I meant what I said, meant when I said I want you and Braden in my life.” He leaned down and kissed her. “You’re my life now, and although I wasn’t the best father to my own children because I wasn’t there like I needed to be, I’ll be a good man.” He kissed her again, and then leaned back. “I’ll be so good to you and your son, I swear on everything that is me, Jana.”
She knew he had two adult children, a boy and a girl. She’d heard enough at the club to know a lot of the men had been so ingrained in the club life that they’d neglected what should have been just as important. But Jana couldn’t blame them for what they’d missed out on, because she knew life in general was hard and consuming, and many people, her parents included, seemed to overlook what was really important and should be held close.
She breathed out roughly, stared into his dark, soulful eyes, and rose on her toes to kiss him. “Be with me, make this real, cemented in this moment, Tuck. I want you, want this life.”
He groaned, slammed his mouth fully on hers, and she let herself get lost in the feeling of everything that was Tuck Oakley.
Chapter Thirteen
“God, Jana baby, what are you doing to me,” Tuck said without question. He clenched his hand in her hair and pulled her closer to him to take her mouth in a possessive kiss. She’d come to him, told him that she wanted this, and he wasn’t going to deny either of them, not when he felt like he was going to tear right through his fucking skin if he didn’t have her now.
They panted against each other’s mouths, and he licked, sucked, and basically fucked her mouth like he’d be doing between her thighs very soon. Tuck broke the kiss, smoothed his hands over her arms, and down until he rested them on her hips. “Let me see you, Jana,” he said in a low voice, not wanting to push her, but about to go over the deep end right now if he didn’t have her. She breathed in and out roughly, then took a step back.
“You may not like what you see,” she said on a shaky breath.
He shook his head, his heart breaking that this woman would think there was anything about her that he wouldn’t like. “Jana, sweetheart, there isn’t anything that would ever make me want you any less. Believe me when I say I want you like a madman.”
She took a deep breath, grabbed the bottom of her shirt, and slowly lifted it up and over her head. He didn’t breathe, didn’t even move as he watched her creamy, curvy flesh come into view. The still healing bruises had his blood boi
ling with rage. He curled his hands into fists, told himself that this was about them right now, and anger was not welcome.
“You are so damn gorgeous, Jana, and all mine.” He could go fuck something up later and get the rage out of him, but until then he’d show her that she was all he focused on. It was easy when she looked at him with this bareness, this vulnerability that had him wanting to just take her into the bedroom and hold her closely. Once the shirt was tossed to the side he took in the sight of her breast barely restrained by her plain, almost innocent cotton bra. The white material didn’t hide the darker color of her areolas, or the fact her nipples were rock hard.
He moved closer to her, wrapped his hands around her now bared waist, and kissed her hard and possessively. They kissed for several minutes, their breathing matching in frantic intensity, their body heat making the room stifling, but in a good, erotic way.
Jana brought her hands to the front of his jeans and fumbled with the button for a second before finally getting it undone. Tuck didn’t let her break the kiss while she did it though. He cupped the back of her head, tilted his to the side, and kissed her long, hard, and swiped his tongue along her lips. Although his heart was pounding fast and fierce, and the need to be the one to take control of the situation rose up in him, he let her take the lead. Tuck knew she’d need this, at least for their first time. She needed to be the one that had the control, because he could sense she was teetering on the edge.
She needed this, or at least he thought she did, felt like she did, and Tuck would do anything for her. Fuck, he’d do anything for Jana. It was a realization that could have brought him down to his knees. He’d worship this woman, make her his old lady, and show her that with that title came his protection, his loyalty, and his undying affection. He’d love her until he died. Tuck would make sure she and Braden were always happy, because until he had met her his life had felt empty. He hadn’t realized that until he’d seen her, gone after her, and knew that to him she was his everything now.