“Well, maybe you shouldn’t have left,” she started.
I looked at her, wide eyed. “Mom, he just discovered he had a son! He didn’t need to have to worry about me as well. He needed to focus on his family.”
“Shouldn’t that have been his decision to make? Sounds like you made it for him by leaving.”
I shook my head furiously. “What else was I going to do? He has a child!”
“Maybe.”
“Maybe.”
“So why haven’t you reached out to him?”
“Because I have no business reaching out to him!” I nearly yelled back. It was just flooring me that my mother seemed to think I was the one to blame for William’s and my relationship falling to pieces.
“He’s going through something, and he probably needed you to help him through it.”
“But what about Janet? You’re forgetting the part about his ex-wife!”
“Yes, she’s an ex for a reason. Did you ever get the idea that he wanted to be back together with her?”
I shook my head as I considered it. “Well, no.”
“Right, so even if he has to take care of his child, that doesn’t mean he wants to be with Janet. In fact, I would wager he doesn’t want to!”
I shrugged. “Well, I haven’t heard from him so what difference does it make?”
My mother gave me a pointed look. “Of course, you haven’t. Just like you’re trying to be selfless, so is he. He’s trying to protect you from what he must be going through.”
The more I thought about it, the more sense it made.
William was already full of self-loathing, and it wasn’t something I expected he’d be able to overcome overnight. No doubt the reappearance of his ex with a child she claimed was his was probably throwing him right back into his past and the feelings of failure he’d tried so hard to overcome.
Somebody had to pull him back from the rabbit hole.
And it wasn’t going to be Janet.
However, I wasn’t sure it was going to be me either.
Going back meant bracing myself to deal with whatever roadblocks Janet set out for us, and I had to imagine they’d be plentiful. And there was that whole thing about whether or not William would even want me back.
Of course, he wants you back! My inner voice demanded. You know he’s as in love with you as you are with him.
Then there was the matter of that beautiful baby boy. I had no issues with William having a child, but I wasn’t sure if I was ready to help raise one. I hadn’t even gotten through college, so I was nowhere near ready to be a stepmom.
I faced my mom. “There’s so much to take into consideration. There are so many unknowns and so many things that could blow up in my face.”
“Honey, stop overthinking this. You love William, right?” she asked.
I nodded.
“And he loves you?”
“Yes.”
“Then everything else is secondary. Go to him, Delilah. He needs you now more than ever, even if he doesn’t know it.”
The more I thought about it, the more I realized my mom was right. William did need me, and I would be there for him. I stood up and smiled down at her. “Thank you, Mom.” I leaned down and wrapped my arms around her in a fierce hug. “I have my phone on me so if there’s anything that you need, anything at all, I’ll come right back,” I promised.
“You worry too much,” my mother said as she waved away my concern with her hand. “I’m going to busy myself with one of those old black and white movies with Cary Grant. Don’t you worry about a thing.” My mother gave me an encouraging smile as I shrugged into a jacket, and then grabbed my keys and my purse.
“I’ll be home soon, Mom,” I said.
Minutes later, I was in the car on the way to William’s house with no idea of what I was going to say or do when I saw him or…her.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Delilah
“Angel.” One eyebrow rose in surprise as William took me in from head to toe. “I wasn’t expecting you.” He was standing in his doorway, dressed in jeans and a t-shirt with no shoes. I stood on his porch and shifted from one foot to the other, feeling completely uncomfortable.
“Yeah, I wasn’t sure I was going to come either, but my mom sort of talked me into it.” I pulled my jacket tighter around me. “Can I come in?”
“Yes, of course. Come in.” He opened the door and gestured for me to go inside where there was already a warm fire going. Camille was snoring by the fireplace, and when I approached, she opened one eye to look at me, deemed that I wasn’t a threat and promptly fell back asleep.
“I’ll get you a heavier coat,” William said as he disappeared inside for a second. Before I could protest, he draped it around me, and it covered me like a blanket. It even smelled like him. It was a smell I missed more than I could say.
“What’s wrong? Is everything okay? Is your mother alright?” William looked concerned, but also confused.
“No, everything isn’t okay, but it has nothing to do with my mother. She’s fine.”
“Okay,” William drew out the syllables.
“I realize I reacted in a hurry when Janet showed up, but I was in shock, and I thought it would be best if I left.”
“I understand. You don’t have to explain yourself to me,” William said, kindly.
“I’m not here to explain myself.” I paused and took a deep breath before I continued. “Well, maybe I am. Anyway, I think you’re going to be a great dad whether it’s today or years from now, I was just afraid that with Janet back that maybe you wanted to play the role of father and husband again…with her. And I… I didn’t want to get in the way of that.”
“There’s nothing to get in the way of,” he corrected me.
“Then nothing is going on with Janet?”
He shook his head. “Nothing is, and nothing ever will be.”
I swallowed hard as I stared into the fire, secretly delighting over his words. I’d been so afraid that maybe they had gotten back together, that he and I would be over and done with. “And do you… still care about me?” I asked, not meaning to sound so pitiful, but there it was.
William laughed in spite of himself and then his expression turned serious. “Angel, I love you. I’ve never stopped loving you, and I never will stop loving you.”
I couldn’t help the tears that sprung to my eyes the second his words registered in my ears. I was just filled to the brim with happiness. It was overflowing from me. “Then can we pick up where we left off?”
By the light of the fireplace, his expression was inscrutable. I couldn’t tell if he was happy or frustrated or sad or what. I suddenly regretted my decision to stop by unannounced.
He expelled a harsh breath. “Angel, I wish it was that simple. You deserve more than a man with a past, a man whose saddled with baggage like I am.” He shook his head and sighed heavily. “I wish I could be the one to give you everything you deserve, but I’m coming up short. So short.”
“William, I deserve you,” I insisted. “Remember when I stood here a few weeks ago, and told you that I hoped you’d be my last not just my first?” He nodded. “I meant it then, and I mean it now.”
“Are you sure you know what you’re getting into? Asking you to love me and accept me is one thing. Asking you to accept that I might have a son, that’s a completely different thing,” William reminded me.
I gripped one of his hands and loosely intertwined my fingers with his.
“William, you are you. Past or not. Son or not. When I said I loved you, I didn’t just mean during the good times. I meant during the bad times as well.” I beamed at him, wanting him to understand the true depth of my feelings for him. “And now that you’ve told me you love me, I’m not going anywhere.”
“How can I put you through this?” He brushed my hair behind my ears and leaned his forehead against mine. “It was bad enough when it was just my past which was in the past but now…this.”
His eyes
fluttered closed, and so did mine.
“You’re not putting me through anything. I’m choosing to be here,” I whispered with as much conviction as I could muster, hoping I was getting the point across. I opened my eyes and found him intently studying me.
“How is it possible that I’m so lucky?” William murmured as he began to pepper my face with kisses.
I giggled as I wrapped my hands around his neck. “You aren’t; I am.”
William leaned back to look at me. “Let me be perfectly clear about this, Angel. You are perfect. I AM the lucky one. Not you. Why you chose to love someone like me is beyond my comprehension, but I will never stop trying to earn that love, and to make you the happiest woman alive,” William vowed. “If Samuel is mine, or if he isn’t, I don’t want you going anywhere.” He clasped his hands around mine firmly and yanked me forward. When we were chest to chest, he wrapped one hand around my waist, and with the other, he began to play with my hair.
“Are you sure?” I searched his face for any sign of hesitance, but there was nothing but trust there. And love.
“I have never been more certain of anything in my life. I know we haven’t known each other long, but when I’m with you, I feel like I’ve known you my whole life,” William confessed as he gave me a shy smile. “I know that sounds so cliché, and emotions aren’t really my strong suit, but it’s how I feel all the same.”
I beamed at him as I kissed the tip of his nose. “It’s not cliché if it’s true. And I feel the same, William. You make me feel safe. You make me feel like I’m home.”
With that, William crushed me to his chest and buried his face in my hair. Surprised by the sudden onslaught of emotions, I wrapped both arms securely around him and placed my head in the crook of his neck. I inhaled his clean scent which was a mix of soap, mint and a woodsy smell I couldn’t quite identify all mixed with his own natural musk. He smelled like heaven.
His expert hands glided across my back and drifted up towards my shoulder blades where they kneaded and pressed in a way that made my entire body shiver in pleasure. My body curved against his as I began to nibble on his ear.
William’s chest vibrated against mine “Somebody’s eager.”
I nodded. “Yes, and this time I’m not going to let you get out of making love to me with silly statements about how we have to wait.”
He pulled back, and I titled my head up to look at him as he chuckled down at me. “I missed you,” he said as he gave me a soft smile before he pressed his lips firmly to mine. I responded with equal fervor as my hands began to play with the hair on the nape of his neck, and his hands began to travel all over my body. A slow fire began to form in the pit of my belly. I squirmed impatiently, and William smiled against my lips as he maneuvered us backwards.
Not having any clue what he was doing, but not wanting him to stop, I simply let him take the lead, and I allowed my body to follow his. My knees hit the back of the couch, and I stumbled backwards with William hovering over me, never once breaking the kiss.
Soon, his gentle kissing turned into a more insistent demand, and I gently parted my mouth with a single breath. Our tongues began a sensual battle for dominance as my hands glided all across the smooth planes of his back, managing to push his shirt off at least halfway.
I groaned in frustration as I tried to push it all the way off, but the shirt wouldn’t budge.
William tore his lips away, gave me a heated look, and in one swift movement, his shirt was off and somewhere across the room. He reattacked my lips with the same passion as before, but this time his body moved me backwards, so that I was spread out across the couch.
A memory of the last time we’d been hot and heavy flashed through my brain, and my legs tightened in desire as I recalled how it felt to have him on top of me, and to have my hands tied behind my back. His stubble grazed my skin as he began to place feather-light kisses all over my neck and arms.
“Something is missing,” he said, suddenly as he peered down at me.
I frowned up at him. “What do you mean?”
“The most beautiful creature in the world is lying beneath me, and she has all her clothes on. Something seems to be wrong with this picture,” he finished, playfully.
“What are you going to do about it?”
“As much as I like this hoodie, it’s going to have to go.”
With that, he effortlessly ripped the sweatshirt open with his bare hands, and he tossed the tattered remains off to the side.
“I’ll get you another one,” he said to my expression of surprise. I half wondered if he’d rip off my t-shirt and my bra too. But, he simply removed both with less urgency than he had my sweatshirt.
He buried his face in my chest right between my breasts, and my heart started to hammer. He began to kiss and nibble on my nipples, and I found myself panting with desire as I pushed even closer to him.
“I missed your scent,” William grunted as he rocked his hips against mine.
“I missed yours,” I moaned as I began to feel his erection pressing against me.
William leaned back to look at me, and before I knew what was happening, he had my hands in a vice like grip.
“William,” I pleaded as I wriggled the lower half of my body.
“Not so fast,” he growled as he kept one hand on my hands and reached down with the other to unhook his belt. Then he tied my hands with the belt and eyed me with barely concealed hunger as my stomach flipped and flopped. He was so unpredictable, so dominant, and so completely masculine.
He stood up abruptly, giving me ample view of all the slopes and curves of his muscles including one particular bulge that threatened to rip apart his boxers. I couldn’t seem to pull my attention away from his obvious excitement.
“You’re stunning,” I whispered.
Before the words were even out of my mouth, he was back on top of me, his mouth on mine. He pulled away again and smiled down at me. “Do you trust me?” he asked.
“Of course,” I answered and frowned up at him as he grabbed my t-shirt and folding it lengthwise, he brought it down over my eyes, knotting it behind my head. All I could see was blackness.
Suddenly, I was hyperaware of the way he sounded, smelled and felt pressed against me. Not having your sight to rely on really did heighten all your other senses.
I felt his bulge press against my center, and I shifted my body, so that he was pressed directly against my core.
William chuckled as he slapped one of my butt cheeks playfully.
“Ah, ah, ah, I’m in control here, Angel.”
In general, I found cocky, dominant men annoying in day to day life. But there was something about this beautiful man and how dominant he was in the bedroom that sent shivers up and down my spine.
“I’m the only man who will ever make you feel this way, do you understand?”
I nodded eagerly. Then I arched my back as William’s hands found my breasts. My nipples were as hard as pebbles as he palmed them and began to run his tongue across them. A moan tore through my lips as he bit down on one of my nipples slightly, and I nearly shuddered at the contact. After a while, he moved on to the next nipple and lavished the same amount of attention on it, but by that time my legs were already trying to move him closer.
“Say it, Angel,” he prompted.
“No other man will ever make me feel like this,” I said.
William shifted and pinned both my legs with one of his. I really was well and truly under his control, and I had never felt more wanted in my entire life. It was exhilarating.
I felt his mouth moving from my neck, down the slope of my stomach, and all the way down to the drawstrings of my sweatpants. He tugged on them and seconds later, they were off. I heard a rustle and felt his bare legs against mine. He began to rotate his hips so I could feel the head of his penis against the sensitive flesh between my legs, just above the lace of my panties, and the breath caught in my throat. He was the ultimate tease, giving me just enough friction to get
me all hot and bothered, but not enough to satisfy me.
“Please William,” I whispered, huskily.
“Shhh,” he responded.
I gasped when I felt his hard length pressed against my center with only my panties acting as a barrier. He pushed against them, threatening them with his rigid length. And I couldn’t help but wish he’d do the same thing to them that he’d done to my sweatshirt.
He buried his face in between my breasts once more, and he began to nibble and pull on them while simultaneously rotating his hips until it felt like I might combust.
“William,” I breathed.
“Yes, my Angel?”
“I want you so badly. Please.” Deciding that I needed to tease him a bit to try to even the teams, I began to wriggle my hips against his, and when I heard his answering grunt, I smiled with victory.
I smirked. “It feels like I’m not the only one who wants this bad.”
“I can honestly say that I want to be inside you right now more than I’ve ever wanted anything.”
All the air left my body in one fell swoosh as I felt William turn me over so my back was facing him as he pressed himself against my ass, snaking one arm around me to hold me in place because my arms were still bound behind me. I began to breathe heavily, my desire becoming painful as I squirmed. His mouth was right next to my ear, and I turned my head to the side and captured his earlobes with my lips. It wasn’t much in the way of moves, but his ears were one of his sensitive spots.
He lay flat against my back when I felt him untie my blindfold. I blinked rapidly as my eyes adjusted to the sudden light. Without any kind of ceremony, he plunged one of his fingers inside me as I arched up against him and screamed with pleasure. My body instinctively clenched around his fingers as he pulled them out and shoved them back into me again.
“You feel incredible,” William said, huskily.
Once my eyes cleared, I lowered my lashes and bit down on my bottom lip. “I want you now, William. Please.”
“How badly do you want me?”
“So bad I would force you if I could.”
Mountain Man Page 19