My God, I still couldn’t believe we were married.
Two sets of vows and a ring later and here we were, connected for eternity.
I pressed my hand to my heart as moisture built in my eyes.
“How am I supposed to tell him?” I whispered to myself, worry becoming a pit in my stomach as my news came to the front of my mind.
I found out the day Lucas asked me to marry him, right in front of the cottage he and his father built for us on the very land where we had met for the first time almost ten years ago.
How was I supposed to tell him that I was pregnant, with his father standing right there?
I couldn’t.
Lucas had always dreamed of being a musician; a real musician as he would put it. Now that he’d gotten a scholarship to Julliard and an internship with one of the largest record labels out there, Advantage Records, how could I hold him back from it?
six weeks went by so quickly and now I had to tell him.
I blinked at my reflection and told myself I could do this.
We would figure it out.
As we always had.
“Baby. Let me see you, please.”
Hastily, I stripped out of the dress Farah crafted for me and tucked it gently onto a hanger on the back of the bathroom door before opening it.
I stood in front of the heated stare of Lucas Jones, in nothing but a pair of red lingerie with lace covering only the essential parts of my body. My breasts spilled out from the bra I wore, my nipples becoming hard and aching for his touch almost immediately after seeing the desire in his eyes. My pussy clenched in need for what he’d do to me, knowing just how gentle he could be but hoping he wouldn’t be.
I wanted him. All of him. Every tantalizing inch.
And then I’d tell him.
Lucas’ tongue graces his parted lips, licking them as if I am a juicy piece of steak.
My heart beat rapidly as he stepped forward, his head moving slowly upward as he took in every inch of my body with his wide eyes.
The moment his eyes met mine, he took a fractional step away from me.
Immediately, my heart sunk to the floor.
Without a word, he went to the side of the king sized bed in our room and retrieved a white robe.
His fingers grazed my skin far too lightly as the robe fell over my shoulders and I wrapped it tightly around me. I felt naked then, in more ways than just physically.
Gently, two fingers grasped my chin and pushed it up so I was forced to look into his eyes, raw with desire and tender with concern.
“Tell me.”
Two words, and he had me.
Dipping my head, I wrapped the soft fabric even tighter over my torso.
“I—Lucas, I’m pregnant. We’re going to have a baby”
My eyes closed in fear of his reaction, but when I felt his mouth come urgently down on mine, his strong yet gentle arms lifting me until my legs were wrapped around his chiseled hips, I gasped in surprise.
Taking full advantage, his tongue licked mine ardently, his mouth softening as tears of such joy coursed down my already damp cheeks. My hands came up from his chest, smoothing over his sleek dress shirt and moved to tangle into the locks of hair at the back of his neck. His moan against my mouth caused a delicious chill to race up my spine, and before I knew it he wrapped one arm around my legs and carried me to the bed just two steps away.
My eyes, red rimmed and filled with joy, never left his as he did so.
“Jesus, Kel. My gorgeous girl.”
His voice was reverent, warmth covering his entire being as we basked in such a sweet moment.
“Do you have any idea how much I love you?” he whispered, covering my cheeks with kisses as my hands clenched and smoothed in his hair.
“I do.”
He then cupped my cheeks with urgent touches, his dark olive eyes penetrating mine.
“I love you so much.”
I bit my lip to stop it’s trembling and nodded, my head falling to his chest softly.
“I love you,” I whispered.
We fell asleep like that, my head resting on his chest, his arms holding me as if he would never let me go.
Content.
Safe.
Strong.
Loved.
When I woke, it felt as if every stress I had felt over the last month was lifting off me.
“When did you find out?” Lucas asked, his voice rumbling sexily into my ear.
I sighed, turning deeper into his embrace.
“The night you proposed. I had taken a test that morning.”
His muscles tightened in his shoulders and arms. He blinked once, twice.
“What did you just say?”
Lucas got up from his place at my side and stood, his arms instantly coming to cross over his chest.
I had the fleeting thought that he must be the hottest man alive, even when he’s angry.
“Luke—I . . .”
“You’ve known all these weeks and just didn’t think it was information you wanted to let me in on? What on earth gave you the right to keep this from me, Kel?”
His voice was hard as stone and cold as steel. Heat rose in my cheeks in response, my hands shaking as I feared what his anger would lead to.
One thing about Lucas I had learned quickly was that he had a temper. Though it hardly ever reared its head, it was there. He fought to control it just as hard as I tried to control my anxiety growing up.
But it had never, ever been directed towards me.
“I had to process . . .”
“No, no, you did this on purpose. I can understand that you took a few days to be sure, to think about things. But six fucking weeks? NO. Were you even going to tell me?”
“I-yes, Lucas!”
My voice came out shrill in the effort it took to make him believe what I was saying. My body began to shake, worry seeping through me.
He didn’t believe me.
The man had trusted me for a long time now but with this? He didn’t.
“I’m not going to do this right now. It’s my wedding night, for Christ’s sake.”
He moved toward me and a breath of what I thought was relief came from me as he neared.
But when his arm moved behind me to grab his leathers, my heart felt as if it had stopped completely.
“Wh-where are you going?”
He didn’t even look at me as he replied, his voice empty of the affection it always had with me.
“Out”
My voice was scratchy when I answered the ringing phone only an hour later. I sat with a Coca Cola, the only beverage I could find in the sad excuse for a mini bar this room had, still in a white robe and a pair of panties. Still alone.
“Hello?”
“God, are you OK, honey?”
It was Aria, my sister.
I nodded, then realized I had to verbally tell her I was OK.
Was I?
I didn’t know.
“I’m fine, did you enjoy the reception?”
“You don’t sound okay, sis. Do you want to come stay with me? What did he do?”
“What? Who?”
I scratched at my aching legs, yearning for a warm bath.
“Lucas. Why else would you be upset?”
I had the strong urge to growl at her. I had said I was fine.
“Why would it be Luke’s fault?”
“It’s your wedding night.”
“I know but it’s-”
The door to the suite burst open at that very moment, startling me enough that I dropped my phone. Before I could open my eyes from the ordeal, I felt Lucas’ hands on my barely covered thighs as he held the receiver up for me to take.
He had come back.
“T-hank you.”
God, how I hated how my voice would shake and stutter when I was nervous or scared.
I pressed the phone to my ear, refusing to meet hi
s stare in fear of seeing the contempt in them that I had before.
“Lucas is here. I’m going to go.”
I didn’t give my sister the chance to say anything else, I just let the phone fall from my ear.
“Kel I’m-”
Urgently, I stood up, told him a poor excuse of I have to use the bathroom before escaping to the safety of the bathroom and dropping down until my butt hit the tiled and frankly cold floor.
“Sweetheart, are you okay?”
I didn’t answer, but when a sudden sob wracked my frame I was sure he could hear it.
“Ah, Christ, please Kel. Kaelyn. Let me talk to you.”
Deftly I slid over so my back rested against the glass of the shower door and I reached up to unlock the bathroom knob.
My eyes were closed, my heart heavy, my mind self-incriminating and doubtful, but when he stepped into my space, I felt him.
His presence took over my body without him ever touching me, and mentally I told myself how stupid I was for not telling him sooner.
I had hurt him and I didn’t know how to make it better.
You can’t.
You’ve lost him.
Your lie has pushed him away, forever.
My doubts goaded me, but I forced them away.
“You are so goddamn beautiful, Kel. I don’t know how I got so lucky.”
I opened my dry eyes and dared to look into his.
I didn’t see hate or anger or rage.
All I saw was love.
His love for me and his regret, too.
“Did you have fun?” I whispered as he pushed the sash of my robe out of his way and pulled the fabric off my shoulders.
Dropping his head, he shook it solemnly.
“I went to the park across the street and I called my Dad. I needed an ass kicking.”
That made me smile a bit. Lucas pulled me to my feet and helped me remove my robe and the lingerie I so wanted him to rip off me.
“No, I was-”
Pressing a kiss to the top of my head, his forehead came to rest over mine.
“I was a fucking fool, Sweetheart. You had every right not to tell me. I would have freaked out. I would have worried. I would have fought with you.”
I didn’t waste any time stopping his self-deprecation and clasped my hands over his jaw.
“That wasn’t why.”
His eyebrows rose yet he didn’t say anything.
“I was scared. You have so much to look forward to; your career, the internship, your music that everyone will love just as much as I do—I didn’t want to hold you back.”
His eyes narrowed dismally and his head shook in what I thought was exasperation.
“No, silly girl. You are my heart. You are the reason it is beating right now. I cannot wait to watch you grow as our child does. I cannot wait to find you the unhealthiest foods just to see that, yes, that smile right there. I cannot wait-”
He paused, emotion clouding his green eyes, making them appear almost black.
“I can’t fucking wait to spend forever with you. Please tell me I haven’t lost you already.”
My voice shook as I cried out for him, pulling him closer and burying my face in his chest as I shed a few more tears of utter joy.
“I love you,” I whispered once they had dried and we lay in the aftermath of what I would consider the most tender, rough, and soul shattering sex we had ever had.
“Moon, baby,” Lucas uttered sleepily, his love for me still so evident as he drifted to sleep.
Present
My eyes lazily dragged open to the hushed morning light that peered into my bedroom through slightly open blinds. Sighing softly, I let them close yet again as I waited for the moment to pass.
I waited for the laughter and the crying and the sounds of pots and pans and yelling about where the griddle was to make waffles. We always misplaced that thing.
How the hell we could lose track of a bulky griddle that stayed in the same cabinet was beyond me, yet it happened.
I waited for way past that familiar twelve minute mark but still didn’t hear what I always did each morning.
My eyes slid open, narrowed with a hint of suspicion. I looked around the room, finding everything the same as it was last night.
Am I in the right house?
I turned over, reaching for my phone instead finding a piece of Meghan’s stationary paper.
Smiling from ear to ear, I padded out of the bedroom in search of a much needed coffee and found a letter on the door of our pantry, with Meg’s handwriting.
“Hmm, what could this be?”
Opening it quickly, I read the note and couldn’t help my laugh.
She had taken my keys to the cafe and the Chase Bank card we always kept under the kitchen island to buy our joint groceries.
She really wanted me to rest.
Shit.
Picking up the note again, I read the rest of it.
Sighing, I pressed the brew button on the Keurig and made my way toward the bathroom, finding the door slightly open.
There was a note taped to the bathtub rim and I smiled at my best friend’s knowledge of what I considered relaxing.
“She knows me well” I said to myself, opening the note eagerly.
Grinning, I closed the door with my foot and unbuttoned my top and then my sweats.
The water felt heavenly on my cool skin as I lowered myself into the bath, my toes curling in joy.
Shit, I loved this tub. It’s about the only reason we bought this house.
This tub.
God.
My eyes closed in contentment and for just that moment, I let my worries go.
“Kel?”
I heard voices come from outside the bathroom door and rose above the heated water enough to peer through the suave green shower curtain. I heard it again and hastily pulled on the nearest towel to cover myself.
“Kel, are you okay?”
My heart twisted with sweet familiarity when the voice calling me came over my ears again. Not bothering with my shoes, I rushed to open the door, my hands going to my mouth to cover the scream of excitement that threatened to wake the dead.
“Oh my God, you’re here!” I was squealing and I didn’t even care. My younger sister, Aria, was standing a foot away with her baby boy on her hip, a wide yet concerned smile on her bright face. God, how long has it been? I honestly couldn’t say.
She hadn’t been down here since last Christmas, at least.
When the dust had settled after Lucas’ disappearance, I had thankfully been able to mend our relationship. I hadn’t known what to do when I was in so much pain and so, I had pushed her, my father and my mother away. As she cocked her hip to the side and smiled gently at me, I knew I was damn lucky she’d found it in her heart to forgive me. She was an amazing person and a good sister to me. I didn’t realize until just that moment how much I’d needed my baby sister to talk to, to laugh with.
“I’m here. Gavin had a meeting up in Dallas and I thought it would be nice to have a little vacation from teaching for a while. I hope it’s okay . . .”
I shushed her with a wave of my hand, beyond happy she was really here. As I rushed to hug the shit out of her, I pressed a kiss to little Gage Henry’s head and breathed in that intoxicating baby scent; baby powder and love.
God, I loved that smell.
“It is perfectly okay, Ari. I am so happy you came to visit!” She gently let her child down to roam the room and pulled me into an embrace. I wrapped my arms around her slender form and kissed her cheek.
“You look so happy.”
“I am, how could I not be? I have this one, and two more back home. They sure keep me on my toes, but I love every second of it. Being a mom, it’s the best high I’ll ever know.”
“And Gavin?”
I pulled away from her, seeing the light reflecting in her green eyes void of the shadows that at one ti
me, were all she could see. But that all changed the moment a certain billionaire playboy waltzed into her empty life. My sister had always been an introvert, quiet and reserved. But she had loved life. Family. Adventures. Friends. School. Dance. They had kept her happy and content, but I knew she needed so much more than even her passion for ballet gave her. I saw the blush fill her face and the love move through her irises at the mention of it and knew without a doubt that the love she craved then, she had found with Gavin.
“He’s getting my bags . . .”
“Right here, Beautiful.”
The deep echoes of the man’s voice zipped through the space and I dropped Aria’s hands to help him with the heap of bags he is carrying.
“Gavin, it’s so good to see you. You treating my sister right?”
He nodded once, not needing to give me his word when the steady love he had for her was so evident in his eyes. Taking two bags from him, I led them down the narrow hall of the house, past the doors of the girls’ rooms and toward the guest bedroom.
“It might need some tidying, but it’s yours.”
Peering inside, Ari smiled brightly and gave me a look that said it all.
“I can’t believe you painted this room violet.”
I shrugged and placed the bags across the queen sized bed in the center of the room.
She bumped her hip into mine, a knowing grin across her face.
“I’m rubbing off on you.”
“Nope.”
“Yep.”
Laughing, I blew her a kiss.
“I think I hear the phone ringing.”
Shaking her head, my sister cocked her head to the side.
“Sure you do,” I heard her say as I closed the door, then leaned against it and felt the warmth cover my chest from our quirky banter.
God, I’ve missed that girl.
As I found my way to the kitchen, my cell that I had left on the counter this morning started to ring, as if on cue. Pulling my sweater tighter around me, I answered with the smile still across my face.
“Get your surprise yet?”
“Oh, Meg you did this?”
I could have kissed her right then. The girl had to have the biggest heart out there, even after the hard road she had traveled on in her life. From a very young age, Meghan was without the love Aria, Jeremy, and I had grown up completely sheltered by. Bounced from one foster home to the next, she had no sense of a true home. But no matter that, she loved with her whole heart.
Breaking Lucas (Trinity series Book 2) Page 8