Cassandra wanted to say that it was not only physical strength that made you great but Alexander didn’t seem like he wanted to hear that.
“So what happened that night?” Cassandra asked quietly.
“Arissa and I, we were both not allowed to attend the festivities”, Alexander said, frowning. “Hera said that seeing our mother Thetis would be strain enough on her; she didn’t want to see more proof of Zeus’s infidelity as well that day. So we stayed outside and watched them get drunk and feasting, but of course we were curious about our half-brother and so, when we thought everybody was asleep or too drunk to care, we went in.”
He hesitated for a moment as if the memory was too painful for him. She wanted to say that he could stop, that she didn’t need to know, but just then he continued.
“Mount Olympus is different from anything you have seen here on earth”, he said and closed his eyes. “It’s beautiful and yet it is not entirely real, too. Anyway, we knew it was dangerous to approach Achilles while he was sleeping but we just wanted to get a good look at our half-brother. We were sixteen and curious. And after all we were just looking, right? But then Arissa went closer and up until that day I don’t know what possessed her but she touched Achilles’ back. He woke up screaming and immediately attacked her. He didn’t even wait to see who she was or why she was there, he simply rammed a knife into her stomach and threw her to the side. Then he went straight at me and I wasn’t so lucky. He stabbed me forty three times before my father stopped him. By then I was barely alive anymore. Although I was immediately treated by Asclepius, the damage to my spine was too extensive. Arissa, who was barely hurt after all, never forgave herself for that night.”
“What happened to Achilles?” Cassandra asked and Alexander’s face turned bitter.
“Nothing”, he replied.
“Nothing?” Cassandra asked incredulously. “He almost killed you and he wasn’t even punished?”
Alexander shrugged.
“He claimed he had been too intoxicated with wine and that he had been attacked. Hera said it was our fault for having snuck in and Zeus, although furious, could do nothing more than ban him from Mount Olympus forever.”
Cassandra thought that was a small punishment compared to what Alexander had to endure.
“Ever since then, communications between the gods and Achilles have not been what you would call friendly.”
Cassandra nodded.
“I can imagine that.”
After that, they were silent for a while. Cassandra was just about to say something when there was a short knock and then, without waiting for an answer, Arissa came walking in.
“Sister”, Alexander said coolly and Cassandra thought that they didn’t seem like brother and sister any more, that something else must have happened since that night that had torn them so far apart. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
His voice was barely civil; he only relaxed a little when Ben entered after her. They exchanged short nods and Cassandra wished she could disappear into thin air. Arissa strode up to Cassandra and then circled her. Then she turned to her brother with a frown.
“My dear brother, if you wanted something to play with I would have gotten you someone pretty.”
She spat out the last word and Cassandra gritted her teeth.
“I am no one’s plaything”, she said and stopped Arissa’s arm in midair from slapping her. In one swift movement she got up and turned Arissa’s arm behind her back. Or would have, if Ben hadn’t intervened. Again. He threw her against the chair and positioned himself between the two of them.
“Enough”, Alexander said. “Cassandra, please don’t lower yourself to her level and Arissa – this is none of your business.”
This time the authority in his voice was so strong that even Cassandra felt she might have trouble defying him.
“Cassandra is my Friend”, Alexander said and somehow Cassandra felt that this had been said with a capital F and meant something different. “You will not touch her or try to harm her again. Do you understand?”
Cassandra had the fleeting thought that if that had been Pandora, the phrasing wouldn’t have been precise enough but she didn’t say anything. When Arissa finally inclined her head and nodded, Ben let Cassandra go. Cassandra saw a look of contempt in Ben’s eyes and realized that her bathrobe had slipped a little, revealing that she was naked underneath. Suddenly Cassandra was tired of playing games.
“I am going home now”, she said and pulled the bathrobe together again. Then she went over to Alexander and, without thinking, she bent down and softly kissed him on the cheek.
“Thank you”, she whispered into his ear. “You were very kind tonight. Sleep well.”
She went to the door and somehow got outside without meeting anyone’s eyes again. When she came to the bottom of the staircase, one of the men from the shower was waiting for her there to hand her some clothes. Cassandra accepted them gratefully.
“You can change in here,” he said and she realized that she was close to one of the apparently many bathrooms in the palace.
“Thank you”, she said but he was gone already.
When she was finally dressed, back home and in her bed she wasn’t even trying to reign in her emotions any more. So much had happened that day, so much she didn’t understand or know how to deal with. She was a mess of conflicting feelings but most of all she was tired. She was so tired that she cried herself to sleep.
When she woke the next morning, Cassandra felt a little better. She stretched and then walked over to Pandora’s room to find her sister fast asleep and tossing and turning, talking in a language Cassandra didn’t understand and that sounded metallic somehow. Pandora was sweating and Cassandra gently woke her up. Pandora stared at her wild-eyed but when she realized it was Cassandra, she sighed and yawned.
“Bad dreams?”
Pandora shrugged.
“Nothing new there”, she said, then stretched like a cat. When she saw the bruise on Cassandra’s throat, she was suddenly wide awake. “What’s wrong? What happened to you? Did someone try to hurt you?”
Cassandra explained again what Bear had done to her and had a tough time calming Pandora down afterwards.
“But it’s not fair”, Pandora cried, time and again. “A trainer shouldn’t do that to you. You shouldn’t even be paired up with such a brute, let alone be taught by one. Why don’t you do anything about it?”
Cassandra saw the tears in her sister’s eyes and felt that Pandora still had a lot to learn in this world.
“It’s not so different from our training at the orphanage”, Cassandra reminded her sister gently. “I always had to go against Hector there.”
“But Hector didn’t want to kill you”, Pandora said, shaking with tears and anger.
Cassandra hugged her sister and told her not to worry.
“It’s fine”, she said and kissed her on the forehead. “And now it’s time for you to get going. Classes start in an hour and your hair looks terrible.”
Pandora pouted.
“Of course it doesn’t”, she said, still sniveling a little and then frowning when she saw Cassandra’s swollen eyes. “You need some coffee. And your sister needs some beauty time to herself.”
Cassandra smiled, thinking that her sister already looked perfect. Then she went looking for Hector. It was time to start their day and hopefully it would end better than the last one. But you never knew. Life was difficult sometimes. And it certainly never gave you what you expected.
9 An Informal Evening
It became a kind of habit for Cassandra to join Alexander after her training sessions with Ben. It never got quite as intimate as the first time – not only because Cassandra now always thought to bring her own clothes and didn’t have to wear a bathrobe anymore, but also because Alexander didn’t seem quite as open towards her as during that very first time.
She tried to ask him about his life after the fateful night on Mount Olympus, how he had dealt with the fact that he hadn’t b
een able to walk any more, couldn’t move his left hand and had to rely on help to do the most basic things but he always blocked her off. She eventually accepted that this was all she was going to get from him and after all, they found enough things to talk about.
Cassandra always went straight for the book shelf in Alexander’s room before she sat down to eat something. She loved the smell of the books, how they felt to her touch and couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to have read them all. Cassandra liked reading but technically it had been Pandora who had read most of the books and recited them to the others at night. Her sister, who had never been a fighter, had regularly snuck out during their training sessions at the orphanage and gone to the public library. When she had come home, she had told them about heroes, gods, monsters and just about everything else. Even months later Pandora could still recount a story word by word, as if it had been imprinted on her mind. Sometimes, Cassandra too had been allowed to go the library and together they had read their way through literature as best as they could.
When Alexander offered that she could take some of the books from his private library home with her, Cassandra had gladly accepted. She still wasn’t too keen on ancient philosophy but she enjoyed everything on tactics or defense strategies. And she found that she had a weak spot for novels. Alexander had given her one on their second evening together and ever since then she had often stayed up much longer than she should have. In the end she decided that the next one would have to wait until the holidays or she would never sleep.
Ben hardly spoke to her again after their first training session. When she went to the palace to train with him, he barely acknowledged her, shouting short, clipped instructions at her. There was a lot of sweating and swearing and not much room for error.
Their training sessions often ended with Cassandra having more bruises than she had bargained for and they both always left in a far worse mood than when they had come in the first place. After one of those evenings where he had mercilessly beaten her through the room, and in the end managed to give her a hematoma the size of a small rock on her right arm with a particularly nasty hit, Cassandra had enough. She pulled off her mask, shouted at him that he was an idiot and that it was time he got a grip on himself. Then she threw the stick towards him, which he simply let happen, and left without another word.
Shaking with anger, she pulled off her clothes and went under the shower. Afterwards, she accidentally ripped one of her good t-shirts and, swearing under her breath, went into Alexander’s room. She barely acknowledged him and went straight for the romance section instead.
“Why do you even have them?” she asked and Alexander, who had apparently not expected her that early, quickly sent away the servants who had been preparing him.
“You seem to be in a wonderful mood today”, Alexander said and tried to hide his embarrassment at not having shaved properly nor combed his hair but Cassandra didn’t even notice.
“You should throw them all away”, she said and pointed at several books. “It’s stupid to fall in love with someone just because she is pretty and rich when there is someone living in your very own house, with a good heart who would do anything for you and then wait some twenty years full of heartbreak until she finally takes you after all. He could have been happier much earlier than that. Stupid.”
She poked another one.
“And why do they think dark and gloomy is more interesting than light and nice? Granted, the nice one has one foot in prison but the other one is just so damn haughty!”
Alexander came rolling towards her and only when she saw a distorted image of herself in the window and realized that it was not distorted at all but the ugly face of wrath did she stop her angry rant. For the first time that evening she really saw him and all her anger seemed to magically disappear. He looked incredibly sweet with his tousled hair, a speck of shaving cream on the tip of his nose and a look of utter confusion in his eyes.
“So you think that she should have taken the good-looking rascal with the bad history rather than the equally good-looking dark and gloomy guy who turns out to be the good one in the end? You do realize that he is the hero and not the other one?”
Cassandra furrowed her brow.
“Well, he shouldn’t be”, she said and then levelled her head to the side. “And do you honestly mean to tell me that you have read the book?”
Alexander gave her a wry smile.
“I have a lot of free time”, he said. “And it is one of the greatest novels of all time.”
Cassandra wanted to deny it but ended up nodding.
“I wouldn’t have picked you for a romance reader”, Cassandra said and without thinking she bent down to wipe the bit of shaving cream from his nose.
As soon as she did it, she knew it was a mistake. Up close, he was almost too much to take in. His skin smelled of soap and sun and the urge to run her hands through his hair was almost impossible to control. Almost. Because when she saw the look of longing in his eyes, she knew she wouldn’t be able to reciprocate that, not with the same intensity, not today.
“Is that vanilla?” she said and was glad the words didn’t get stuck in her throat.
To lighten the mood, she made as if to eat it and carefully retreated to the edge of the sofa. Alexander laughed but there was an edge to it, like it cost him.
“He can be pretty irritating sometimes”, Alexander said and Cassandra didn’t even pretend that she didn’t know that he was talking about Ben.
“Irritating is putting it nicely”, Cassandra said and let herself fall back, reaching for some grapes in the process. “Infuriating, exasperating, frustrating would be more to the point.”
Alexander tried to hide it but he wasn’t pleased by her strong reaction towards Ben. But Cassandra couldn’t help it. He made her just so angry by his refusal to deal with her.
“I am sorry”, she said softly. “It’s just, he can be so distant sometimes. I thought he wanted to train with me, now it often seems like he is only trying to make me test my limits.”
“He speaks very highly of you and your abilities”, Alexander said and again Cassandra felt that it wasn’t easy for him to say that.
“Well”, she said evenly, trying not to let him see how much his words meant to her. “Maybe next time he could show his appreciation by not breaking every single bone in my body.”
Alexander sighed and said that Ben had had a rough day.
“Who didn’t”, Cassandra wanted to say but let it drop when she saw the hopelessness in his eyes.
And suddenly she knew that she needed to tell him something. There was so much misery and pain in him, so much dark desperation, that for a moment she doubted her vision of them standing beside each other would ever come true. Because there was still the possibility that he would make a conscious decision not to wait that long.
“Remember that I am a Cassandra?” she said quietly, her hand holding on steadily to the glass she was holding. “I know that we are not always believed but things won’t always be like this for you.”
Alexander raised his eyebrows in confusion.
“They won’t always be dark and gloomy, I mean”, Cassandra said, trying to find the right words without revealing too much and found herself stumbling. “Not that you are dark and gloomy, I mean, you can be pretty funny and…”
The eyebrow went up a little further.
“I am very funny”, he said. “And don’t forget handsome.”
Cassandra sighed.
“Don’t flatter yourself”, Cassandra retorted and sighed. “A nice personality doesn’t always make up for bad jokes. But yes, you are funny. And handsome. Very.”
Alexander picked up an apple and threw it with surprising precision.
“You could at least pretend to mean it”, he said.
“You shouldn´t play with food”, Cassandra replied, ducking away in time to evade the apple.
“Maybe you should stop toying with people then”, he mumbled, which Cassan
dra choose to ignore.
The mood was lighter afterwards and when Cassandra went away that night, she found that she had been hard pressed not to go up to him and simply kiss him. She knew it wouldn’t have been a good idea but she increasingly started to ask herself why it couldn’t be a good idea.
After a surprisingly good night’s sleep, she felt she would be able to face whatever was coming more easily. And what was coming was a day of training and an invitation to an “informal” dinner with the other contestants at Alexander’s place on the weekend. Cassandra felt that Alexander could have mentioned that invitation the night before but maybe it had slipped his mind. Or maybe he had come up with the idea once she had left. Cassandra wasn’t sure what the motive behind his actions was but she was pretty sure that there had never been a dinner for the contestants before that, let alone an informal one.
Hector was invited as well but he excused himself saying that he simply didn’t want to go. Hector didn’t like talking and when people tried to make him, he usually got troublesome. So it was probably for the best that he stayed home although she wasn’t very keen on having to face the other contestants by herself and to probably be ignored by them the whole evening anyway.
Two days later she found herself walking towards the palace by herself. Cassandra had grudgingly taken Pandora’s advice and “dressed for the occasion”. The dress Pandora had given her was much too short so she was wearing it as a kind of shirt and even though according to Pandora it “highlighted her assets”, Cassandra only felt exposed. She had agreed to wear a simple silver necklace and bracelet but only after she had asked Pandora if she had stolen them. Her sister had smiled and told her that she hadn’t stolen them on university grounds which was good enough for Cassandra. Used to taking the servant’s entrance by now, Cassandra came in though the back and then went up straight to Alexander’s room. Shortly before arriving, she ran into River. His eyes widened appreciatively when he saw her and to her surprise, he bent down to give her a kiss on each cheek.
“Good evening, Cassandra”, he murmured and his voice was like soft waves touching the shore. He smelled of sea and sand and a little of fish but not in a bad way. “You are even more beautiful than usual, if I may say so.”
The Unclaimed (University of the Gods Trilogy Book 1) Page 11