We entered the lobby, seeing the large planets and stars hanging from the ceiling.
Derek was instantly amazed. “Whoa…”
We went to the different exhibits and simulations. In the Mars rover experience, Derek got to drive the cart over the planet in virtual reality, using actual footage collected from the device. Then we moved to the other sections, learning about the gas giants at the edge of the solar system, and even seeing a replica of Voyager 1 and 2.
Derek was amazed by everything.
We went into the theater with the seats that reclined back to see the projection of the universe onto the ceiling. It was a presentation about the origins of the universe, the formations of stars and galaxies, of Earth’s relative smallness compared to the mass that stretched across billions of light-years over the universe.
When I turned my head toward Cleo to see if she was enjoying the show, she was already looking at me, her blue eyes reflecting the light from the virtual stars. Her hair was down, lying on her neck in the perfect way, and the slight smile on her lips was so soft.
I stared for a while, more intrigued by her appearance than the show that fascinated my son. Sometimes I got stuck in these situations where I wanted to stare at her instead of anything else, where my brain was so stimulated by her appearance that I couldn’t look away.
She was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen.
The presentation ended, and the lights came on.
Derek’s voice interrupted my thoughts. “They didn’t say anything about aliens.”
I broke eye contact with Cleo and turned to my son. “There’s been no scientific evidence to support their existence, so why would they be mentioned?”
“NASA says there’re fossils of bacteria on Mars, which means there was life there once. Doesn’t that qualify as an alien?”
My son always impressed me with his intelligence. “I think so.”
“Well, they didn’t mention that.”
“Maybe they’ll talk about it somewhere else.”
Cleo sat up. “What about Area 51? What do you think is there?”
Derek climbed out of his chair. “Not aliens. I think they’re hiding knowledge, technology, stuff the public isn’t supposed to know about.”
I rose to my feet and took Derek’s hand, making sure he didn’t fall down the stairs as we left the theater. “Maybe we’ll find out someday.”
“Doubt it,” Derek said as he rolled his eyes.
We went to the gift shop next since our time was almost over.
Derek immediately grabbed a handful of things. “I’m gonna get this and this…”
“You can pick one thing, Derek.”
He turned to me, his hands full of stuff. “What? That’s not fair!”
“One thing,” I repeated.
He growled under his breath and started to return items.
I turned to Cleo. “I don’t want him to be spoiled.”
She smiled. “Good call.”
“Kids who are used to getting whatever they want become assholes.”
“Did you get everything you wanted?”
I turned to her, seeing the smile on her face. I knew it was a joke, picked up on it right away, when I never understood anyone else’s jokes. “Very funny.”
Her smile widened. “You think Derek will be an astronaut someday?”
I turned back to my son, watching him move through the store as he tried to pick a single item to take home. “No.”
She raised an eyebrow. “Why?”
“Astronauts are extremely intelligent, but they’re also quick on their feet, have fast reflexes, can solve problems in a very short amount of time. If Derek grows up to be like me, which I imagine he will, he won’t have that kind of intelligence. I take my time thinking things through. I can see him being an astrophysicist or a theoretical physicist. But kids change their minds all the time. I imagine he’ll be a lot of things.”
She smiled. “You think he’ll be a doctor like you?”
I turned back to my son. “He’s never expressed an interest in that. But we’ll see.”
“You don’t care what he decides on?”
I shook my head. “As long as he’s a good person, I don’t care.”
“Good answer.”
Derek finally picked something. “I want the rover replica…but I want a t-shirt. Ugh, I can’t decide…” He held both of them, like two sides of a scale.
It was difficult to watch his struggle, and like all parents, I caved. “Alright. You can get both.”
“I can?” He held both items in the air. “Yes! Thanks, Dad.” He carried them to the register.
Cleo was grinning at me.
I turned back to her. “What?”
“He’s got you wrapped around his finger.”
“That obvious?”
She nodded. “Because it’s sweet.”
I went to the shirts and grabbed one for myself. Then I grabbed a women’s version, getting the smallest size they had. “Is this okay?”
“You’re going to buy me a shirt?” she asked in surprise.
“Yeah.” I carried them to the register. “That way, we can all match.”
We went to a restaurant afterward, having a late dinner.
Derek wore his shirt, a picture of the solar system with the planetarium logo on the front. He also brought his rover toy inside, quietly playing with it as he sat across from me.
Cleo looked at the menu. “The pappardelle looks pretty good…”
I’d already decided on my dinner the second I glanced at the menu. “Derek, what are you getting?”
“Pizza.” He didn’t take his eyes off his toy.
“No pizza. You had pizza for lunch.”
“But I like pizza.”
I looked at the kids’ menu. “How about the chicken noodle soup? Or the grilled chicken?”
He stuck out his tongue.
Cleo tried to hide her chuckle but failed.
“You can’t eat junk food all the time, Derek.” I set the menu down. “You want to be strong like me, right?”
He sighed.
“I don’t eat pizza.”
“Fine…” He kept playing with his toy.
The waiter came over, and I ordered for the two of us before I turned to Cleo.
“I’ll take the pasta.” She handed her menu over.
The waiter left.
Derek kept playing with his toy, but it was obvious he was getting tired. His energy was gone, and his eyes were a little heavy. When I walked into his bedroom at night, I usually found him asleep on his desk with his models in front of him, as if he played until exhaustion pulled him under. “What are we doing tomorrow?”
“Grandma wants us to have lunch together, then the movies.”
“Grandma?” he asked, looking at me.
“Your grandma moved here,” I said. “She lives down the street from me.”
“I want to move here…” He turned back to his toy.
“Maybe someday,” I said, wishing I didn’t have to drop him off in a few weeks. It was so painful every single time. I wanted him to be here with me always. Even if Valerie had him most of the time, I could just pick him up and take him to a ball game or something. Or if he ever needed me, I was just a few minutes away. How could I help him when I was on the other side of the country?
“Uncle Tucker will be there too?”
“Yep.”
“And Cleo?” He turned to her.
She started to speak. “Well, I—”
“Yes, of course.” I turned to her. “You’re always invited.”
She closed her mouth and stared at me, like she was surprised by the offer.
“You’re coming, right?” Derek asked.
“Uh, sure,” Cleo answered. “I love spending time with you guys.”
And I loved having her around. I always felt better when she was with me. After my conversation with Tucker, I pushed the thought from my mind, pretending it never happened. I’d
wanted to push her away initially, but the second she touched my arm in my mom’s apartment, all my opposition went out the window. We went straight back to what we used to be.
“When are we going back to the cabin?” Derek asked.
I drank my wine. “Next weekend.”
“That’s so far away…” He slouched in the chair.
“It’ll be here before you know it.” He had so much energy, ready to experience life at the fastest pace possible.
“What about during the week?” Derek asked.
“You’ll stay with Grandma sometimes,” I answered. “And I’ll take you to work with me.”
“I’ve never been to your work before,” he said.
“Well, I’ll show you around.”
He nodded. “Cool.”
The waiter brought our food, and we ate in comfortable silence. Instead of throwing a fit, Derek ate his chicken and veggies, motivated to be like me someday. But he was growing tired with every bite, sleepy.
Cleo nudged me in the side and nodded to him.
I looked at my son, who had rested his head on the table, so tired he fell asleep in a crowded restaurant. “I did it. I finally wore him out.”
She chuckled. “Until it starts all over again tomorrow.”
He slept against me in the car, my arm around his shoulders.
Cleo watched us from her side, her fingers playing with the diamond in her lobe.
We pulled up to her building.
She gave me a quiet wave, like she didn’t want to wake him up.
“I’ll walk you.” I undid my safety belt.
“You don’t have to, Deacon—”
“I don’t mind.” I shook Derek slightly.
He woke up, looking at me with heavy eyes.
“Let’s walk Cleo to her door.”
He didn’t think twice about it before he climbed out of the car, walking slowly.
I took his hand, and we walked with Cleo into the building.
“Why are we doing this?” He was so tired that he gripped my leg and leaned against me.
Cleo smiled down at him.
I picked him up and held him in my arms, knowing he was too tired to stay awake, and I didn’t want to leave him in the car. I knew my driver well, but I didn’t feel comfortable leaving my son with anyone besides myself and Cleo. “Because a man always walks a woman to the door.”
The elevator doors opened, and I walked with her to her front door, holding Derek with both of my arms as his arms hung down my back.
She got the door unlocked before she turned to me. “I had fun. Thanks for letting me tag along.”
I didn’t know why she was thanking me when she was the one who’d done me the favor. “Goodnight. “
“Goodnight.” She waved before she closed the door.
I carried my son back to the elevator.
He was dead asleep, passing out against me the second I picked him up. When I held him like this, I could feel his gentle heartbeat, the way his chest rose and fell steadily as he breathed. He was a bit heavy, like a log, but I didn’t mind the weight. I wished I could do this every day, enjoy him at this age forever. Because one day, he would grow up and be hardened by the world, by how people treated him because he was different, the way they treated me.
Mom and Tucker were already at the restaurant when we walked inside.
“Grandma!” Derek ran to her and jumped into her arms.
Tucker interceded and caught him before he crashed into our mom. “Whoa, little man.” He put him on the ground before letting him move into Mom.
Mom wrapped her arms around him. “Derek, I’m so excited to see you too.” She squeezed him tightly, holding him at her waist.
“You gotta be careful.” Tucker rubbed his palm into Derek’s hair. “You’re stronger than you realize.”
Derek moved to him next and hugged him.
Mom walked over to me, flinching when she spotted Cleo beside me, like she hadn’t expected her to join us. “Honey, I can’t believe this is happening. We’re all having lunch together, and we haven’t done that in so long.”
“I know, Mom.” She always made me feel so guilty. “But we’ll get to do this all the time.” I hugged her and kissed her on the cheek.
She approached Cleo next. “It’s so nice to see you, dear. I didn’t realize you were joining us.”
“Deacon invited me.” She extended her hand.
My mother ignored it and pulled her in for a hug.
Tucker shifted his gaze to me, giving me a meaningful look.
I didn’t understand the stare, so I ignored it.
Tucker rested both of his hands on Derek’s shoulders, standing behind him. “Cool shirt, man. You guys went to the planetarium yesterday?”
“Yep.” He tilted his head back so he could look up at his uncle. “Dad, Cleo, and I all got matching shirts.”
“Awesome.” Tucker raised his gaze and looked at me again.
“What?” I asked bluntly, confused by the attitude.
He never answered.
We sat at the table, Derek at the head next to me, while Cleo sat on my other side.
My mom was smitten with Derek, her pride and joy. “Tell me everything about the planetarium.”
Derek immediately rambled on, talking her ear off.
Tucker kept looking at me.
Cleo’s eyes were down at her menu.
I suddenly realized why it was weird, because Cleo and Tucker probably hadn’t seen each other since they’d broken it off. Honestly, I’d totally forgotten they ever dated. It had left my mind completely.
Cleo raised her chin. “I’m getting the waffle. What about you?”
Tucker picked up the menu. “Probably the Cobb salad.”
She nodded. “Mine sounds a lot better.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, it does.”
I watched their interaction, which seemed to be pretty smooth.
Derek kept telling my mother about the planetarium.
“So, how are you?” Tucker asked. “Anything new with you?”
“Just work,” she said. “You?”
“Same,” he answered. “I was working mornings only, but since it’s our high season, my hours are all over the place.”
“Mine too,” she answered.
I looked at the menu.
Cleo turned to me. “What are you getting?”
“The sautéed kale bowl.”
Derek made a face when he heard that. “Dad, I don’t have to get that, right?”
“Of course not,” my mother said. “Get whatever you want, sweetheart.”
Derek immediately grinned. “I love you, Grandma.”
She chuckled. “Aw, I love you too.”
I turned to Cleo, rolling my eyes slightly.
She smiled back. “Grandmothers are supposed to spoil their grandkids.”
“And make me look like the bad guy,” I said.
Tucker watched us, drinking his iced tea with his eyes glued to our interaction.
After we ordered our food, we settled into small talk, my mother talking about her experiences living in Manhattan. Before the food came, Cleo excused herself to the restroom.
Whenever Derek was with people he knew well, he wouldn’t stop talking, so he said every thought that came to mind, knowing his grandmother would eat up every single word.
Tucker stared at me. “So…spending time with Cleo?”
Mom turned to our conversation. “She’s a lovely girl, Deacon. Very beautiful.”
Maybe bringing her along was a bad idea. Whenever Cleo joined us, she fit perfectly, and I never thought otherwise until my family hit me with questions. I grabbed my iced tea and took a drink.
Mom continued to stare at me, as if she’d asked me a question.
Tucker had the same look.
“Well?” Mom pressed.
“Well, what?” I asked, thoroughly confused.
“Why is Cleo here?” she asked.
“What kind of question is
that?” I countered, angry. “I didn’t realize we were such an exclusive family.”
“No,” Mom said. “We love Cleo, Deacon. Just…is she here for business or pleasure?”
It was another weird question. “She’s my friend.”
Mom exchanged a look with Tucker.
Tucker shook his head, like he was answering a question she hadn’t asked.
Cleo returned a moment later. “I’m so excited for that waffle…”
As if the waiter had heard her, he brought the plates of food and set them down in front of us.
Derek had chocolate chip pancakes, taking advantage of his grandmother to get whatever he wanted. There was a big dollop of whipped cream on top. Cleo’s food looked similar.
We started to eat, Derek getting melted chocolate all over his face.
“Derek.” I held up his napkin. “Come on, manners.”
He took the napkin and wiped his face, but he kept eating like a dog.
“Leave him alone,” Mom said. “Let the boy eat.”
Derek grinned and took another bite.
Cleo chuckled.
My mother turned to her next. “Cleo, do you want to have children?”
I dropped my fork onto my plate. “Mom.” I glared at her, knowing exactly what she was doing.
“What?” she asked innocently. “She’s great with Derek, so I was curious…”
Cleo didn’t seem to mind. If she did, she hid it well. “Yes. I want a family someday.”
My mother’s expression changed, as if she liked that answer. “Are you from New York?”
“No.” Cleo didn’t have a lot of opportunity to eat her food because now she was getting waves of questions. “I was born in Seattle. My parents passed away almost ten years ago, so I decided to move here.”
“Oh,” she whispered. “I’m sorry…”
Cleo shrugged. “Yeah, it’s rough during the holidays, but one day, I’ll have my own family, so it’ll be alright.”
“Very true, dear,” Mom said. “And how long have you been at this job?”
“Over seven years. Kinda just fell into it.”
“And is Deacon your best or worst client?” Mom asked.
Cleo smiled. “The best—definitely.”
I ate my food, wishing my mother wouldn’t interrogate her.
The Man Who Has No Heart Page 9