by Emma Vikes
I began to get ready for work, trying to get into the right mindset. The right mindset would help me focus on work, even when Everett would be working right across from me. I didn’t want him to think that he had a lingering effect on me, and that I still wanted him despite the fact that I was the one who had clarified things. Everett wouldn’t change his priorities and I wouldn’t change mine, and I knew how badly relationships could go wrong when it wasn’t given enough commitment.
It was all too scary and I didn’t want to dip my foot into uncharted territories.
But as I was taking a shower, my mind flashed back to last night, how Everett’s hands had touched my body, where his lips had left hot kisses all over my skin, how I had writhed beneath him, moaning and calling out his name, begging him for more.
“You can have me until dawn, no lines drawn, Everett,” I murmured, looking at him. I knew that I was tearing down the walls that I had built. But it was just one more time. Just one time and I swore to god that this wouldn’t happen again. I just wanted to feel Everett inside of me one last time before I bid him goodbye, before it all became just a memory.
“But in the morning, I will wake up without you next to me in bed and we will forget and not speak of what happened. Because no matter how much we want this, our priorities still stand.” It broke my heart a little to say it because if I wanted to be honest with myself, I needed to admit that I wanted this to be real, that a part of me was desperate for it to be real. The attention that Everett showered me with, the way his touch ignited a fire within me, the way it felt so right no matter how much my brain told me it shouldn’t.
I wanted Everett Hudson, although I knew that it wasn’t a good idea.
There was a pause from Everett and then I watched as something flashed in his eyes that quickly disappeared before I could read more into it. His lips crashed into mine abruptly, a torrid kiss just like the way he had kissed me in the balcony in front of his brothers. Everett pushed me against the wall, his hand gripping my wrist as he raised my arms above my head and gave hot kisses down my neck. A free hand tore off the flimsy shirt that I had been wearing, an old one that I’d had for a long time. The fabric tore off so quickly that I didn’t even have enough time to process it.
My breasts were on full display and Everett groaned at the sight of them, his mouth latching on to one in an instant. I left out a heavy sigh, the pleasure seeping to my core as I grew wetter for him. I wanted him to slip inside me but Everett was in his own little world, enjoying the softness of my breasts. His hands were touching my entire body, and then moved lower and lower, till his thumbs were hooked on to my underwear to pull it down.
And then all of a sudden, he stopped.
He was breathing hard, his head bowed in front of my pussy and my heart was still thumping wildly against my rib cage as I watched him. Everett looked up at me and his eyes were no longer alight with burning desire. Instead, the desire burned like soft candlelight and the softness in his eyes flipped a switch inside of me. My toes curled in anticipation as Everett slowly moved back up and then I let out a gasp when he swooped me up and carried me to my bedroom.
“Everett,” I could hear my voice was shaky. “What are you…?”
But he just set me on my bed gently and began to strip off his clothes slowly, his eyes lingering on my naked form on the bed, making me feel that this was his first time seeing me naked in front of him. I sucked in a breath at the sight of him. No matter how many times I’d seen him shirtless, he still took my breath away. “If this is the last time, I better make it count, Lexi.”
And what did he mean by that?
“What do you mean?” I whispered, my voice sounding hoarse as Everett moved closer to me, his dick twitching upright. It looked like it was pulsating. And fuck, I couldn’t wait to feel it inside of me, twitching and pulsing, as he rammed himself over and over again.
But Everett seemed to be stuck with a different thought, moving slowly. He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me down until half of my body was on the bed, with my legs up and spread wide. I peeked at him and his face seemed to be devoid of any other emotion besides desire. He moved his head closer to blow a hot breath on my pussy and I squirmed, growing even more wet.
“Fuck,” Everett growled, “you’re so fucking wet for me.”
And without saying anything else, I felt him slide his fingers inside me and begin to thrust it deep and in relentless strokes. “Oh god! Everett!”
His thumb was putting pressure on my clit, rubbing it and it heightened everything I felt even more. I arched my back and then pushed myself deeper into his hand, almost burying his hand into me as he continued to ram his hand into me. “Oh god, Everett! Everett! I’m -,”
And then he stopped, and I gasped as he pulled his fingers out of me. He had a devilish smirk on his face and he cocked his head to the side. In that moment, he didn’t seem to be like the Everett that I’d known. “I want you to beg, Alexa.”
I blinked, my chest rising and falling quickly and irregularly and then I sat up, staring at him wide-eyed. “Everett…”
He moved closer, his face inches from mine, eyes almost pitch black. “Beg, Alexa. Beg for me.”
I swallowed. “I want you.”
He chuckled darkly. “I can’t hear you. Make it clear, Alexa.”
“I want you, Everett. I want to have you inside of me. I want to remember this.”
And without allowing me to say anything more, he grabbed me by the waist and dragged me up the bed and then positioned himself. In one quick motion, Everett’s dick was buried inside of me and I gasped at the sudden intensity of it. His thrusts were so powerful and hard that I had to cling to him, my nails digging into his back. He pushed inside of me with such force and speed that I could feel my head hitting against the headboard of my bed.
“God,” Everett muttered, his eyes closed as he continued to push himself inside of me.
I felt him bury his face in the crook of my neck and I closed my eyes. I pulled him close trying to mould his body into mine. Everett made me feel like we were the only people left in the world. I came, unravelling beneath him as he followed suit, his face still buried in the crook of my neck as I felt his uneven breaths.
It was then that I understood what he meant when he said that he wanted to remember this, because there was no way I would forget what I had just felt. It felt as if the entirety of our beings were poured into each other; and I had half of him and he had half of me. It felt as if we were in a world where it was just Everett and me, and his touch was the sun that brought me warmth, and his kisses breathed life into me.
The coldness of the shower brought me out of my reverie and I sighed, realizing that I had just been standing in the middle of my shower for a while. I rested my head against the wall. “Pull yourself together, Alexa. You know all too well that you and Everett can’t happen for real. Being with him is setting yourself up for heartbreak, so stop being a fool.”
I finished getting ready for work and then began to take the short walk from my apartment to the police department. The walk was a welcome distraction, but my tiredness from last night’s festivities were beginning to catch up with me. I made my way to the café, intending to simply order my coffee and then dash to the office. I faintly hoped that Everett wouldn’t make it to work today so I wouldn’t have to face him. But if he came, then I would just have to pull myself together and pretend that last night hadn’t happened.
“Alexa!” I closed my eyes and groaned at the familiar voice.
Of course, Everett would be here. Where else would he be?
God, I was beginning to regret the decision I had made last night. It was impulsive and unreasonable. I should’ve restrained myself better. Everett continued to wave at me, motioning for me to go to him, and all sorts of red flags and warning signs flashed in my mind. But it was as if my feet were being dictated by a different brain, because I walked over to where he was.
“I got you your order,” Everett sai
d brightly. He had his glasses on now, unlike last night when he hadn’t. His hair was a mess, in the way that it always was. He motioned to the coffee cup on the table, flat white, the way that I always drank it. It wasn’t in a to-go cup either and I noticed that his wasn’t in one either, which meant that he wanted to stay and chat here for a little while; and the idea made me want to disappear.
But how the hell could he be so insanely calm?
“Umm, thanks. Here, I’ll pay you.” We never actually paid each other when either one of us got the other coffee or lunch; but I wasn’t sure if I was meant to bask in that luxury anymore. Just as I was about to fish out my wallet, Everett reached for my hand and then closed his palm around mine. The touch brought a wave of emotion and I looked at him, suddenly dazed.
“You know you don’t have to,” Everett told me quietly, his voice dropping a little, the deep baritone sending a ripple through me. God, he still had such an effect on me and it made me incredibly weak.
“Everett!” The voice that called his name was loud and almost obnoxious. Everett’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion, as did mine, and we both turned around to see a petite woman making her way over to our table, wild brown curls following in her wake. “Oh my, Everett Hudson! I haven’t seen you since high school! Oh my, you haven’t changed a bit!”
Everett stared at her, and then his eyes widened, as if he was finally able to put a name to the face. “Tessie! Tessie McBrown! God, it’s been so long!”
He stood up and gave her a hug and I swear to god that the woman shivered in delight at his touch. Her smile seemed to widen and I could see the hope brewing in her brown eyes. “I know! Wow, you look great, Ev!”
She was smiling so wide at him that I was a little scared her face would break. Everett motioned for her to take a seat beside me and it was as if it was the first time she had registered that he was with someone. I waved my hand timidly. “Hi, I’m Alexa Stone.”
Tessie blinked, as if she was surprised. Everett cleared his throat. “She works with me at the department. We were just having coffee before we headed for work.”
Tessie nodded, her smile widening again. My eyes narrowed in annoyance as I sulked beside her and drank my coffee in silence, while the two of them caught up. Suddenly, Tessie turned to me, all smiles and giggles. “Oh, Everett was the smartest guy in our class. It was no surprise he became our class valedictorian.”
I smiled, tight-lipped, as I stirred my coffee with a spoon. “So, I’m guessing you two were friends in high school?”
She shook her head. “Not just that. He was my partner in a science fair in our first year. We won first prize! Can you believe that freshmen could win the first prize in a science fair?”
“Pretty unbelievable,” I said half-heartedly. I wanted to down my coffee in one go and leave because conversing with Tessie felt awkward. Or maybe I was feeling awkward because I kept feeling random bouts of jealousy each time she looked at Everett; and I knew that I didn’t have the right to feel jealous.
I could feel Everett staring at me, I’d grown familiar with his gaze. He cleared his throat and when I looked at him, he was looking at Tessie this time. “I’d really love to stay and chat, Tessie, but we should really get to work. You know I don’t like being late.”
It seemed like his last statement triggered her to launch into another story, but he abruptly took her hand and squeezed it, smiling at her. “We’ll catch up next time, yeah?”
I swear to god she was ready to melt right then and there when he touched her. She was so susceptible to Everett’s charm that it was unbelievable, and despite claiming that he wasn’t one to play around girls’ hearts, Everett sure knew how to turn on the charm when needed. “Are you free to have lunch? I’m only here for a week and I would love to catch up with you as soon as possible.”
She was looking at Everett and batting her eyelashes, trying to look seductive, and suggesting that they meet up soon. I wanted Everett to decline and tell her that he was busy. But surprisingly, Everett nodded his head solemnly. “Sure. I still have the same number. Do you still have it?”
Tessie’s grin almost broke her face, but she shook her head and then shyly handed her phone to him as Everett typed his number on her phone. “I guess I’ll see you later then, Ev?”
I finished my coffee and stood up, struggling to keep my cool. Everett nodded and gave her a hug. “Of course. Bye Tessie, it was nice bumping into you.”
“Bye, Tessie, it was nice meeting you,” I said, making my presence known. She jumped at the sound of my voice and she smiled- well, more like grimaced- as she waved at me while I followed Everett out. I could feel her eyes on us as Everett opened the door for me, smiling bashfully in the way that he always did, and I couldn’t help but feel smug.
“Are you really going out for lunch with her?” I asked out loud once we were walking on the sidewalk that led to the department. Everett glanced at me and shrugged; his hands stuffed in his coat.
“Sure. We’re just catching up. It’s not like it’s a date,” Everett answered nonchalantly. Well, at least one of them didn’t think of it as a date. “Besides, I haven’t seen Tessie since graduation. Irving’s a small place but it’s not like you see the people you went to high school every day.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Does that mean you want to see people you went to high school with every day?”
Everett paused and shook his head. “No. But it means that I also want to know how they’re doing with their lives. Besides, Tessie’s always been a good friend of mine. Since that science fair project, we got along well. And it’ll be like killing two birds with one stone since the research institute called earlier and wanted me to come by during lunch. It’ll be quick but we could have lunch somewhere near the institute and maybe I could get an opinion from her too. She’s incredibly smart and I’m certain she’ll have some ideas about the research that we’re working on.”
And there it was, the Everett that I’d known all these months, the one who put his work above everything else. It felt like a relief, like there was something that was lifted off my chest; and I felt this tension roll off my shoulders because Everett didn’t see it as a date and he was still prioritizing his work, so I didn’t make the wrong choice.
But at the same time, it still broke my heart because there was no changing this man, and that was exactly why I had to steer clear of him. Everett Hudson wasn’t going to change his priorities and that merely meant that I would never be his priority and he would always choose to spend more time at work than anything else.
Wanting to be with him and allowing myself to would only mean one thing: I was setting myself up for heartbreak, and getting my heart broken was the last thing I needed.
Heartbreak was messy and sometimes left you numb. I couldn’t afford losing focus on work because my colleague had broken my heart. It’s not that I would demand him to make time for me when I wouldn’t be able to give him enough of mine too.
Pursuing a relationship with Everett knowing that we both had end goals that didn’t include a partner would only mess up whatever we had now.
18
Everett
Tessie was pissed at me for bringing her to the institute before actually having lunch. We finally ended up having a 15-minute lunch. She wasn’t thrilled that I had other plans rather than spending an hour and a half with her, catching up. I did want to catch up but I had things to do and needed her opinion as well, which was why I agreed to have lunch with her.
“You’re in a sour mood,” Wang said the moment I got back from lunch. I shrugged the snow off my coat and patted it off my hair. “Why the long face?”
“I bumped into my friend Tessie from high school and she asked me to have lunch with her. The institute wanted me to check on something at the same time, so I told her that we would be having lunch somewhere near the institute; and I’d also wanted her opinion on something with the research. I got a little carried away and we only ended up having a fifteen-minute lunch.�
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Wang stared at me in disbelief and he began to shake his head as we got on the elevator. “For a smart guy, Everett, you can be dense.”
My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “What’s that supposed to mean? Tessie just wanted to catch up.”
He sighed as the elevator doors opened and we began to make our way to my office. “Yes, so anybody would get annoyed with that. The girl invited you for lunch but you ruined it by working at the institute. Lunch meant to catch up could also translate into a date in someone’s book. You screwed it up, Hudson.”
I made a face. “But I don’t like her. Why would I go out on a date with her?”
Wang paused in front of the door and stared at me, looking at me up and down and then pushed the door open. “Sometimes, you’re impossible.”
“What are you two arguing about now?” Alexa asked and my attention snapped to her. Her hair was tied in a bun now, strands of red hair framing her face. She had her glasses on as her fingers deftly opened her laptop.
Wang pointed at me as he sat on Alexa’s desk, grabbed an apple from her desk and took a huge bite. My eyes narrowed as Alexa tried to swatt his hand away but the grin on her face told me that she didn’t really mind Wang. They’d grown close but not in the same way that Alexa and I had. It wasn’t that I thought Wang would suddenly want to ask her out on a date, but then there was a possibility that he would and I wasn’t sure how I would react to that if that happened.
“Everett went on a date, without knowing it was one, and ruined it,” Wang said nonchalantly, biting the apple again and chewing loudly. “Can you believe that, Alexa? At this rate, we’re never going to find him a girlfriend! Say…”
Wang paused and then focused his attention to Alexa, grinning madly. “You’re single too, right? And you two spend so much time here! Why don’t you two just date?”
It was suddenly so quiet you could’ve heard a pin drop. Alexa and I avoided looking at each other as she continued to type on her laptop and I tried to find something to busy myself with. Then Alexa cleared her throat and I could no longer hear the tapping of the keyboards.