by B. A. Beers
Moving to the table, Mark sat and sighed deeply. “Let’s start with what is right with her,” he suggested.
“Right?” David asked.
“Yes,” Mark said, watching the others settle down around the table. “I feel the negativity around us. If I can sense it, so can she. I know that I am the biggest cause of it. We need to change that right this minute.”
“I don’t think I could do it. I am too worried,” Grandma Jo stated, coming around from the kitchen with mugs and the coffee pot in her hands.
“You can,” Mark offered as she placed the items down on the table. “Switch your worry to hope. Her body is unresponsive, but she hears us. She is only lost. We need to help her find her way back.”
“I see your point, Dr. Stevens, but why is she lost?” Linda asked. “What brought about this current episode? David informed me she was normal.”
“Normal?” Mark asked, eyeing David.
“I didn’t say normal,” David quickly defended himself. “I said she was recovering.”
“True, he did say that. I assumed she was acting more normal,” Linda admitted.
“Normal is a very subjective word. Granted, her behavior has been, at times, acceptable or normal over the past few days, but one word, action or discovery will send her into her altered state,” Mark informed them.
“You have seen that side, I take it?” Linda asked.
“Yes,” Mark answered, rolling his eyes.
“Not her best side,” Linda remarked.
“I agree,” Mark affirmed.
“Her current state?” Linda reminded him.
“You can thank Gus for it,” Mark answered.
“Wait,” Gus stated.
“I didn’t intend for it to sound negative,” Mark assured him. “The minute she set eyes on him, it brought what I call her ‘Mrs. Carter’ personality to the forefront.”
“AJ?” Linda asked.
Mark looked at her strangely. “AJ?” he questioned.
“Yes, Adam James, her son. We call him AJ,” Linda informed him.
Mark nodded. “Her first question to Gus was if he had told me,” he added.
“The quote/unquote ‘Mrs. Carter’ side of her knows about AJ,” Linda said, bringing up her hands to signal the quote marks in the air before her.
“Tell me the story. Why and how do you have her son?” Mark asked.
“I will, but please answer a question for me,” Linda requested.
“If I can,” Mark replied.
“Your presence. How did you get in the door? She rarely lets me in. I have known her my entire life. I have been trying for years to get her help. She bars all attempts,” Linda informed him.
“She called me,” Mark answered.
“Impossible,” Linda stressed.
“The package,” Grandma Jo offered.
Mark saw Linda’s eyes glaze over. “Oh, my God,” she cried. “It was real? From their honeymoon? I had forgotten about it,” she said. “Were there letters and photos?”
“Yes,” Mark answered, frowning at Grandma Jo.
“What is that expression for? She asked,” Grandma Jo stated.
“Dr. Stevens, I only want what is best for Sami. Please allow me to join your support team,” Linda requested. “I am the only ‘family’ she has. It is the reason that I have AJ. I am only his guardian. I didn’t adopt him. He is and will always be Sami’s son.”
“Continue,” Mark directed, without accepting or rejecting her offer.
Linda sighed deeply. “I will never forget that night. When my father received the call from Gus, he contacted me. He knew that Sami would need me. The news was tough to handle. I cried all the way up the mountain. . . for June, for JW, but mostly for Sami. By the way, David, you look a great deal like JW. I almost had a heart attack when you drove up to the house this morning. JW even drove a black, Ford pickup truck. Anyway, Sami’s survival was nothing short of a miracle. I saw the pictures of the car. If she had not gone after Molly, well . . .,” she stopped and looked down at her folded hands on the table.
“You poor dear, what is it?” Grandma Jo asked, getting to her feet and moving over to stroke the top of Linda’s head.
“It is just . . .,” Linda’s voice faltered as she looked up at Grandma Jo’s compassionate face and she began to cry. “I have felt that the Sami I knew and loved did die in that car. The girl I encountered in the hospital was not Sami. It was her, but it wasn’t. I know this doesn’t make sense, but it is how I felt.”
“It makes perfect sense,” Mark stated. “You are correct. The Sami you know retreated into herself to hide from the knowledge of what had happened. She blocked it out.”
“It was my idea to take AJ,” Linda shared, looking at Mark. “I couldn’t allow him to suffer the woman we saw in the hospital and every day since. She lacks love.”
“I have to disagree with you on that account,” Mark stated. “All one has to do is see Molly to know how deeply she is capable of loving.”
“That is it, Dr. Stevens, Molly was all she could focus on. . . not her son. It was unnatural. One would think she would dote on her son, not the dog,” Linda cried.
“I understand your frustration and even anger at this situation. However, in Sami’s case, your initial assessment was right; she believes her life ended in the accident. She believes that she was left behind to care for Molly. Her sole purpose in life was to see that Molly had a good life, not her son,” Mark offered. “Your offer to take her son was probably seen by her as the correct course. If she had perished, her child would have been raised by you. It gave her a reason to stay buried in her mind,” he continued.
“Are you saying my suggestion to take AJ was a mistake?” Linda asked, shaken.
“Maybe, maybe not. It was best for the boy, but not for Sami’s mental health. Adam’s care would have forced her to recover and to move forward. Without that responsibility, she could stay hidden, protected and most importantly, in control,” he informed her.
“I just don’t understand how she could possibly detach herself from her own child,” Linda replied.
“The child wasn’t part of her life at the time of the accident. Yes, she was pregnant, but the idea of him was still intangible. To keep her locked in that time period, all had to remain the same — the same house, her mother’s car, her music, the magazines, the books — nothing that would mark the passing of time. Yes, Molly has grown, but dogs change very little. It is not like a child who has needs. There is no outside interests, no need for clothing. I would even bet that your contact with her over the past couple of years was initiated by you,” Mark stated.
“Yes,” Linda answered.
“And, those visits were brief? I mean real brief,” Mark guessed.
“Yes,” Linda affirmed. “I do wellness checks every Monday. That was why I was at the house this morning. When I didn’t receive an answer to my phone call, I drove over to her house. Seeing the car gone, I panicked. I searched the house for signs of her or Molly. I was on my way over to her neighbor, Mrs. Lyons, when David arrived.”
“You are a true, dedicated friend to continue for so long,” Mark stated.
“I told you; she is ‘family’,” Linda informed him.
“How did Sami behave when you made the suggestion of taking Adam? Not what she actually said, I have that figured out by you having him, but do you recall her body language, her expression, her overall reaction to the offer?” Mark asked. “Do you recall?”
“Oh, I remember it well,” Linda scowled. “I had imagined the worse as we made our way to the hospital. They were still working the accident scene on the southbound lanes when we passed it heading north, roughly three hours after the accident. I could see the condition of the cars and tanker truck in the police flood lights. I was fearful of her state. Gus had told my father that June and JW were dead and that Sami was in the hospital and refusing to see her newborn son, but nothing else of her condition. I figured she had to be alert to refuse her son,
but I didn’t know if she was hurt. That is when I spoke to my father about taking the baby. As her attorney, he would be able to make all the arrangements. It was just an option to offer to her, until she could get back on her feet. When we met with Gus, he had not seen her.”
“They wouldn’t allow me to see her,” Gus reported.
“They couldn’t. Hospital policy,” Mark affirmed. “Go on.”
“Gus related the details of the accident, and then gave us Sami’s purse and Molly. My father spoke to the medical director as I secured the blood-covered puppy in our car. Seeing Molly’s condition, I raced to find Sami. I just knew she would be a mess, both physically and mentally. After my father cut through the red tape, they showed us into Sami’s room. She was regal; it is the only word I could come up with over the years to explain her appearance. She was sitting there with only the remaining baby mound marring her perfect body. No cut, no injuries could be seen. She was freshly cleaned. Her face, however, was hard, set, determined, not an emotional mess that I had envisioned. It was like looking at a stone statue. She acknowledged us, and the voice was just as hard. I flung myself against her. I blurted out my condolences for her loss. I asked about the baby. She didn’t respond to me — no return hug, nothing. Lost, I stepped back and really looked at her. She thanked me for my words, but said my concern was not needed. She thanked me! It was like I had just opened a door for her. I again asked about AJ. She said nothing; she looked confused. I then made the offer, and she immediately picked up on it. Turning to my father, she dictated directions, demanding that he, right then and there draw up the proper paperwork giving me custody of the boy, and to also secure the necessary paperwork to give him her sole power of attorney,” Linda said, shaking her head. “Shell shocked, we just glared at her. Then, she dismissed us. Nothing I said after that was acknowledged. We both tried for over an hour to get her to respond.”
“She shut down,” Mark offered.
“Yes, she did,” Linda replied. “I learned later from the nurse who directed me to AJ that we had arrived moments after the doctors had informed her of the death of her mother and husband. Timing?”
“It could have been better,” Mark answered.
“I believe that if we had been with her when she heard the news, she might have responded differently,” Linda shared sadly.
“You blame yourself for her condition, don’t you?” Mark asked. Linda nodded. “It is not your fault. Give up the guilt. Forgive yourself,” he suggested.
“That is what my husband keeps telling me. Each time I see, hold, or even kiss AJ, my thoughts turn to Sami,” Linda confessed.
“That is not healthy for anyone,” Mark offered. “You must let it go. Continue.”
“Well, over the next few days, arrangements were made, funerals held and the necessary paperwork completed. AJ and Molly went home with me; Sami went home alone. At the beginning, I called her six or seven times a day. She was already short with me. That went on for a couple of months, until one day she did not answer my call. Worried, I drove to her house and found her in the fetal position on her bed holding onto her wedding picture. I panicked and called for help. They took her to the hospital and found nothing physically wrong with her. I really thought she had overdosed, but no, that had not been the case. The hospital staff put her in contact with Dr. P,” she shared.
“Dr. Peterson?” Grandma Jo asked.
“I don’t know his full name. Sami refused to talk about him to me,” Linda answered. “I even went as far as asking my father about it, but he wouldn’t share details. He told me that it was up to Sami to tell me. Anyway, over the next couple of months, she improved. She was still not the Sami of the old days, but she was not ‘Mrs. Carter’ either. I was feeling hopeful for her full recovery until the day she arrived at my house out of the blue and ordered me to give her Molly, not AJ, she wanted Molly. I asked her about AJ and she told me to keep him. . .told me that she had arranged with my father to pay me each month for his care. She had set up a trust fund for him. She then gave me the keys to her house and this cabin. It all sounded so final, but her taking Molly gave me hope. It has been like a never-ending nightmare for me. So, when David said she was with you, I believed it was over. Now, I can see for myself it is just another dead end,” she informed him.
“It is not a dead end,” Mark enlightened her, indicating his head in the direction of the couch. “It is a new path on her road to full recovery.”
“Are you a psychic, Dr. Stevens?” Linda asked.
“No,” Mark smiled. “I just believe in the power of love.”
“Love?” David asked.
“Yes, love got her into this state. It will take love to bring her back,” Mark confided. “Now, let’s get this show on the road. David, where are the chains for the car?”
***
THIRTEEN
“I cannot leave,” Grandma Jo called.
“Why?” Mark asked, frowning.
“Someone instructed me to bake,” she answered, eyeing him. “I have four loaves of bread in the process of rising and cookie dough ready for the oven.”
“Toss them,” Mark directed. “We need to get back to the valley.”
“I will not,” Grandma Jo said righteously.
“I will stay with her,” Gus offered.
Mark glanced between the two and noticed Grandma Jo blush at Gus’ offer. “How do you get back to the valley?”
“Will you need me?” David asked.
Mark looked around at Sami. “Doesn’t appear like it right now. Cannot begin therapy with her in this condition,” he answered.
“Then, I could stay and bring her back,” David remarked.
Mark looked at Linda. “I am going with Sami,” she stated.
“The dogs?” Mark asked.
“Leave them with us. You will need to be with Sami,” Grandma Jo suggested.
Mark walked over to the dogs and squatted before them. “I hate placing this burden on you,” he called, petting Ollie.
“They will be fine with us,” David assured him.
“If I take the truck, will you be able to handle driving the car with chains?” he asked.
David walked over to the bay window and looked at the car. “It might be better to wait a couple of days for the snow to melt and the roads to clear,” he said, turning to Grandma Jo. “You have a problem staying a couple of days?”
“No, unless Mark needs me,” she answered, turning to Mark.
Mark stood and moved over to Sami’s still body on the couch. “At this time, I don’t foresee needing your help,” he stated, looking down at Sami. “Are you sure about staying without a reliable way to get out?”
“I am near,” Gus reminded him. “I do have a tractor. I could clear the path to the road.”
Mark knew he could not say more. “Okay,” he said. “David, get your stuff and the chains for the car out of the truck. Gus, you go get the tractor. Grandma Jo and Linda, gather Sami’s things. I will get my stuff and her keys.”
Mark followed the women down the hall and entered his room. Seeing the cassette on the nightstand, he moaned. Things have sure changed in the past few hours, he thought. His plans for the week were now shot-to-hell. He needed to call Stacy and inform her of the latest. Picking up his overnight bag, he spent a few moments gathering his things and placing them in the bag. With the bag zipped up, he picked up the cassette and Sami’s keys off the nightstand. Grabbing the bag off the bed, he called, “Do you want me to strip the sheets?”
“No, I’ll do it,” Grandma Jo’s voice answered. “Don’t worry about it.”
“Right,” Mark answered, turning to the door and entering the hall. Hearing the two women talking in Sami’s bedroom, he stepped into the room.
“Rosemarie?” Linda asked as she picked up the picture of Sami and her twin off the top of the items in the opened, cedar chest by the bed.
“You know about Rosemarie?” Mark asked.
“Yes,” Linda answered softly. “Sa
mi spoke of her twin.”
“Did Sami’s mother ever talk about her?” Mark asked.
“Never to me,” Linda replied. “I never brought it up. Sami told me to not speak of Rosemarie. All those years, I have wanted to explore the contents of this chest. I didn’t know what was inside. Now, I see why it was locked.”
“Do you know she has four more chests in her home in the valley?” Mark asked.
“Not until David asked me to help him gather her journals out of the one in her office,” Linda answered.
“You did bring the journals?” Mark asked.
“Yes. They are in a box in the bed of the truck,” she answered, turning to him. “I need to know, Dr. Stevens.”