by Anna Paige
She crinkled her brow. “Was that recent? Because—aside from his usual scar—his face looked kinda puffy on one side when you introduced us earlier?”
“Yesterday.”
She nodded. “Okay, that one is basically a matter of leftover anger on your part. Maybe you should have punched him yourself—it would have been a great way to get past it and let him know you’re not someone he wants to fuck with.”
“It’s a little late for that now, though.” I agreed with her assessment, but I’d been so close to an anxiety attack at the time that all I’d wanted was to get away from the cameras so I could work through it in private.
“Maybe, maybe not. We can cook up something later, don’t worry about that. And the cameras are always going to be an issue, but you’ve gotten this far and you were fine, so I don’t think they’re as much of a problem as you want to believe.” She reached for my hand. “I think you’re looking for excuses to bail because of that last thing you mentioned. Tell me what Skylar said about her and Gavin.”
Hearing their names together like that caused a new torrent of tears. Evie quietly crouched there, waiting me out.
When I could speak, I said, “She talked about how they lasted longer than her and Michael and how Gavin wanted her looking perfect all the time so he could show her off. Then she started to talk about how good he was in bed…”
“Okay, stop.” Evie tore off more tissue and dabbed at my cheeks. “I can’t imagine how awful that was to hear, but you had to know he had a past.”
“It’s not that. It’s knowing he was turned on by how perfect she was, how flawless and beautiful.” I looked at her over the tissues. “That’s what he’s used to, what he’s always had. What could he possibly see in me?”
“Did she say Gavin loved her?”
“No, but that doesn’t mean…”
“Don’t you think that wouldn’t have been the first thing she bragged about? I mean, banging is one thing, and we’ve all done our fair share of that, but love is something totally different. If he’d told her he loved her, she would have led with that because it would have meant she was something special instead of just another lay. Women like Skylar, they need to feel superior, which is why she flaunted her past with Gavin in your face, but the joke’s on her because you have something she never did. You have his heart.”
“You don’t know any of that for sure.”
“And you don’t know for sure that I’m wrong,” she retorted. “But what you do know is he loves you, which means none of the other shit should matter. If it bothers you, talk to him about it. But for fuck’s sake, don’t let that attention-whoring viper drive a wedge between you.”
“Viper, huh?” I chuckled. “I thought you’d be fangirling over her. She’s kind of a big deal, you know.”
She scoffed, quirking a brow. “Not to me, she’s not. I’m familiar with her drama—the off-camera kind that makes headlines—and there’s a reason it follows her. You’re the big deal to me, babe. Always have been. And as for Skylar, you go back out there and act like none of this is even on your radar. This is her seeing how far she can push you, not even worthy of a response.”
“And if she tries something that does warrant a reaction?”
She stood and offered a hand. “When you find yourself in a viper’s den, Kaiti-bear, you either prepare to become dinner or you show your fucking fangs.”
Evie took me back to the—thankfully deserted—makeup area and worked her magic to hide my puffy eyes and blotchy face. She did a better job than Lydia. Before I knew it, I was ready to roll.
Gavin popped in as we were about to head to the set and there was a moment where his gaze lingered on my face and I wondered if he knew. He glanced at Evie, then back to me before seeming satisfied that all was okay. “You ready for our first scene? Michael and Jenna are almost done shooting, I think, so I figured I’d come check on you.”
“Yep. Following you.” I gestured for him to go ahead but he didn’t move.
“I like it better when I get to follow you.” He winked.
Evie shook her head and chuckled. “You two are gonna make me puke with this flirty, lovey-dovey shit.”
“Oh, relax. We don’t do this in front of everyone else. You know about us, so it doesn’t matter if you see.”
“Lucky me.” She rolled her eyes.
“Fine, a compromise. We’ll walk together.” He reached out and threaded his fingers through mine. “And I don’t give a shit who sees.”
Please don’t cry, please don’t cry. He doesn’t know how much I was needing this today or how emotional I already was because of Skylar’s little over-share.
To my credit, I didn’t tear up. I did, however, shoot Evie a look that said, ‘I wonder how the viper will like this?’
She chuckled and gave me a little nod as Gavin and I set off down the hall in front of her.
When we approached the set, several pairs of eyes lingered on our joined hands, including Bryce’s and Skylar’s, but only one person made a comment.
Joey stepped over and handed me next week’s script, nodding to where my hand was tangled with Gavin’s. “I couldn’t have written it better if I tried. Good for you.” He bumped Gavin’s shoulder with his fist. “Both of you.”
“Thanks.” Gavin nodded back.
Evie cleared her throat behind us and I waved at her to step up beside me. “Joey, you missed the introductions. This is my best friend in the world, Evie. Evie, this is Joey, casting director, though he does a lot more than that title implies. He’s beyond awesome.”
Joey shyly offered Evie his hand. “Kaiti gives me too much credit.”
Evie grinned and shook her head. “I doubt that. She’s not much for flattery. It’s nice to meet you, Awesome Joey.”
“Nice to meet you, too.”
He was blushing and barely able to make eye contact with her.
So freaking cute.
I made a mental note to ask about his status as soon as I got a minute alone with Gavin. From the way Evie was checking him out, I was sure she’d want to know too.
Twelve
Gavin
When we got back to Kaiti’s place, I could tell there was something weighing on her. She was avoiding my eyes and much quieter than usual. On any other day, we would talk all the way there, joking and laughing about things we’d seen on set or lines that we couldn’t seem to say without messing them up. It was usually a fun, animated ride home.
Usually.
After the events of the day, neither of us was feeling particularly talkative. I knew why I was morose, but that took a back seat to finding out what had my Kaiti-girl off balance.
“So, today was…long,” I commented, rubbing one hand over my stubble-covered jawline.
“Yes, it was,” she muttered, kicking off her shoes and heading directly for the couch.
I turned in the direction of the kitchen. “Wine? Beer? That mint crap you like so much?”
“Bourbon.”
I stopped in the doorway to the kitchen and looked back at her. “Bourbon? Since when?”
“Since I had to listen to Skylar go on about how you loved showing her off when you were together and how great you were in bed.”
Her back was to me but I didn’t need to see her face to know she was hurting. Big time. As much as I would be if I’d had to listen to some other guy talk about…
Jesus, I couldn’t even think about it without getting pissed off.
“I’ll bring the bottle,” I ground out and stepped into the kitchen.
From the direction of the living room, I heard Kaiti mutter, “Good idea.”
Fuck. Me.
I gathered two glasses and the new bottle of bourbon—leaving the open one in the cabinet for a day when it might be enough. Today was a full bottle kind of day, more so than I had realized.
When I had what I needed, I went back to the living room and sat on the couch near Kaiti’s folded knees. She was propped against the corner with her
legs under her and the crocheted throw blanket pulled into her lap. She didn’t move away when I rested my leg against her knee, which was a good sign.
I waited until the seal was cracked and the drinks were poured to look at her face. I was surprised to find her smiling, not in an ‘all is right with the world’ kind of way but at least it was a smile. When our gazes locked, her chin trembled a little but immediately stopped. “I’m okay now, I think, but I have to say that was not my favorite conversation to have. Not even close.”
“I can’t even imagine,” I told her, setting my glass on the coffee table and turning my body toward hers. “And I’m sorry she told you that.”
“But it happened, right? I mean, you two were together? And feel free to be as vague as possible for the sake of my sanity.” She tried to chuckle behind that statement but it sounded more like a dry heave.
“We were kids. Barely sixteen. And it was all so exciting back then, being seen and followed, being stalked by fans and paparazzi. We worked together on a TV pilot—one that never saw the light of day—and the media thought seeing us together around the lot meant we were an item. So, we were. But it was mostly us being immature and thinking the attention we drew as a couple was fun.” I shook my head as I remembered how adamant she’d been that we always leave a crack in the curtains while we made out on her couch. “She was in it for the attention, not for any real attraction to me. And I wasn’t really into her, either.”
“Except when you were sleeping with her, you mean.” Not a question, more of a statement. She didn’t even sound particularly judgy about it.
“No, I wasn’t into her then either. It was just something to do, something that was expected. Another role to play, for both of us.”
“And with me?” She glanced away, taking a sip of her bourbon and wincing at the sting.
“With you what?”
She turned her eyes to mine and looked incredibly vulnerable for the first time since I’d known her. “Are you playing a part with me?”
I reached for her hand and leaned forward, praying that what she saw on my face would convince her. “My whole life was one big role, one act after another, one big lie after another. Nothing ever seemed real or honest, no one ever spoke without an agenda.”
She nodded along as if she understood. After being on set this last few weeks, I was pretty sure she did. She was a quick study, my Kaiti-girl.
I offered her a smile and continued. “I was supposed to get you to change your mind about the show, but from the first time I laid eyes on you, I was the one who changed, who became someone else, someone I almost didn’t recognize—myself. I remembered who Gavin-fucking-Lane really was. Because of you. So no, Kaiti, I’m not playing a part with you. I was playing a part with them. All of them. Every time I touched another woman it was because I felt like I had to, for the camera, for the press, for the headlines. But I get to touch you. I get to hold your hand and kiss your lips and skim my fingers across your smooth, soft skin. Not because it’s in some script or because it will draw attention. It’s because I can’t help myself, because I crave the feel of you; the sound of your voice and the smell of your shampoo and the way you melt into me when I kiss you. Because this is real, the most real thing I’ve ever known, and I want it—want you—more than anything. You’re the only one who’s ever known the real me; the only one who’s ever mattered. Other women may have touched my body, but you’re the only one who’s ever had my heart.”
I pulled her into my lap, and she came willingly, straddling my hips as she looked down at me with watery eyes.
“I’m so in love with you, Kaiti-fucking-Oliver. I never thought it would happen for me, much less hit me this fast, but it did and it’s real, and I need more than anything for you to believe me when I say you’re the one. There won’t ever be anyone else for me.” And it was true. As soon as I got a second, I planned to text Bryce, my agent, and my publicist and let them know I would not be appearing at any future events with anyone but Kaiti on my arm.
I was going off script from now on.
No more set-ups.
No more staged photos or fake relationships.
Game over.
Done.
She cupped my face with both hands, one fat tear falling onto my shirt as she leaned down. “I believe you, Gavin.” She brushed her lips lightly across mine and drew back, another tear falling as she said, “I love you too.”
I couldn’t have hidden my smile if I tried. “Kaiti—”
She put a finger to my lips. “But I need you to understand that I hate—freaking hate—crying and you just made me boo-hoo for the second time today, which means that even though I love you, I’m also kind of mad at you.”
Leave it to my Kaiti-girl to put her own sassy spin on a tender moment.
Taking her lead, I reached up and palmed her ass with both hands, jerking her body closer to mine as my hips surged upward and I pressed my erection into her. “Then, by all means, allow me to make it up to you.”
She bit my lip and ground into me with a soft moan. “Sounds like a plan to me.”
“So, when do the scenes I watched the other day actually make it onto my TV screen?” Evie sounded excited and impatient.
Kaiti was fluttering around the kitchen, whipping up homemade waffles and whisking eggs in a bowl. We’d finished up shooting the last few scenes at the office location around two that afternoon and would be moving to the beach set on Monday, so we’d gotten a rare evening off—an early Friday being almost unheard of.
For some reason, we’d ended up deciding on breakfast for dinner and a quiet night in, which was fine with me. She wanted to check in with Evie before we settled in for the night, so she was working on the food while talking to Evie on speaker. “In a few weeks. Four or five, I think?” She shot me a look as I sat at the table, scrolling the headlines on MSN on my tablet. I nodded. “Yeah, Gavin says that’s right.”
“Oh, hi Gavin!” Evie called.
“Hey, Evie,” I replied, raising my voice to be sure I was heard.
She went right back to their conversation. “So, I have to wait a damn month to be able to shout from my balcony that my bestie is a star? Really? That seems like a long time.”
Kaiti laughed, peeking into the waffle maker before closing it back up. “No, my first episode airs in a week.”
I gave her another nod. She was figuring it all out much faster than most people did.
“Post-production dictates how far behind the episodes air. Since I joined mid-season, everything is moving really fast. Only a couple of months of shooting left before the break and then it’s on to next season.” She gave me a wink as she spoke. “Assuming they don’t kill me off, which they probably intend to do.”
“They’ll never want to let you go, babe. You’re gonna be a fan fave from your first episode, wait and see,” Evie argued.
She chuckled and flipped the waffle iron, the metal making a ringing sound and echoing through the apartment. “If you say so, chicky.”
“I do. And I know everything,” Evie retorted. “Well, time to go open the store. Us little people still have crappy retail jobs to get to.”
“Get off your ass and go sell people crap they don’t really need, peasant,” Kaiti teased.
“Go put on ten pounds of makeup and tell lies in front of a camera, superstar,” Evie shot back, laughing. “And tell that hot-ass boy toy of yours to keep the vipers away or face my wrath.”
“Yes, ma’am!” I yelled, laughing along with them.
I’d never admit to them that I was envious of their friendship. I’d never had anything close to the bond they shared and that was just fucking sad. But the reality was friends weren’t actually friends in my world. You could hang with them, sure, but confiding in them or sharing anything deeper than shop talk and pithy jokes was unheard of. It wasn’t done. You couldn’t let people in or they’d use what they knew against you later—whether out of pure spite or competitiveness—your friends always manage
d to turn on you in the end.
Even Bryce, as it had turned out. I was still pissed about that one but had let it go for the time being. I hadn’t forgotten and I damn sure wasn’t forgiving anything.
And if it came down to it, I’d give Bryce the choice to either bury Kaiti’s past or find someone else to play Tyler Savage. I’d wait till Monday, when the file was in his hands and then it was time for a showdown.
I’d avoided being alone with him all week while we worked and had only spoken to him when absolutely necessary. Same with Skylar, though she’d tried to play innocent about her comments to Kaiti, approaching her and giving an impassioned apology—claiming she hadn’t known about Kaiti and me when she said it.
I didn’t believe that for a second. Sky thrived on drama and wasn’t above creating it purely for her own entertainment. It was one of the reasons our little affiliation was so short-lived, no matter how epic and lasting she’d portrayed it to be. A few misspent weeks was all it would ever be as far as I was concerned.
Most everyone on set seemed unaware of the tension between Bryce and me, which sounded about right. The majority of them couldn’t be bothered to notice anything that didn’t directly affect them—Joey being the exception.
He saw all, heard all, and said nothing. He was great like that. You could tell he knew what was going on, but aside from the occasional, “You good?” he kept his nose out of it.
He was the smartest of us all, if you asked me.
Keeping Kaiti from noticing the tension had been much harder, but I’d somehow managed to pull it off. I was somewhat ashamed of how relieved that made me, but I was doing it all for her—to protect her.
“Bacon or sausage in your omelet?” she asked, startling me out of my musings.
“Both?” I asked sheepishly, feeling a little guilty for not helping, even though she had practically banned me from the kitchen when I’d offered.
She nodded. “Okay. Cheddar or American?”
I gave her the sheepish look again.