“Wait a minute,” Elizabeth said in amazement. “Are you worried that I’ll hurt Ronan? Well, you don’t need to be. He’s helping me out, and I’m grateful. When this is over, I’ll pay him back. That’s all.”
“That’s not what I’m seeing,” Sean said. Moonlight shone on his sword, a weapon, but one of great beauty. “I’m seeing a lonely Shifter looking at a woman like he might have a chance at some happiness. If you’re not looking like that back at him, tell him now. Put him out of his misery.”
“I only met him last night,” Elizabeth said. “Give us a break.”
Andrea said, “It can happen fast. You look at each other, and you know.” She rested her hand on her abdomen and shot a look at Sean. He caught it. A lover’s look, exchanging secrets without exchanging words.
“You two need to be alone?” Elizabeth joked. “Seriously. I like Ronan. I have no plans to hurt him. I might not be able to have a relationship with him, but I won’t hurt him. I promise you that. I like him too much.”
Sean’s eyes glittered. “Why can’t you?”
“Why can’t I what? Have a relationship with him, you mean?” Elizabeth shrugged, her shoulders tight. “I don’t know. Things don’t always work out. I haven’t been very good at relationships in the past. In fact, I suck at them.”
“You hold people at arm’s length,” Sean said. “Don’t look surprised, lass. I see you doing it. Even with your sister. But I’m glad to not hear you say, Because he’s Shifter.”
“He being a Shifter makes it more of a challenge,” Elizabeth said. “But obviously, it can be done. Liam and Kim. Ellison says the waitress Annie is going out with a human. And all those groupies sure want it to happen.”
“So, why not, then?” Sean asked. “Everyone’s bad at relationships until you find the relationship worth fighting for. Or maybe you’re already married? Is that the big secret you don’t want to tell Liam?”
“What? No,” Elizabeth said forcefully. “No, I never married anyone. That I can promise.”
“Then what?”
“Sean,” Andrea broke in. “Leave the poor woman alone. Not every female has to fall for the hot, sexy, alpha-male Shifter.”
Sean blinked. “Why not? I thought we were irresistible.”
“You’re a comedian, Sean Morrissey,” Andrea said.
Sean dropped the subject, and Elizabeth walked without speaking after that, enjoying the banter between the other two. She’d never had that kind of bantering fun with a man—except, she realized, with Ronan.
Sean and Andrea walked her all the way to Ronan’s house, where Elizabeth said good night. She had to say good night the Shifter way, she realized, when Andrea gave her a warm, cushy hug, and Sean caught her around the shoulders one-armed and pulled Elizabeth hard against him.
Andrea didn’t seem to think it unusual that her mate hugged another woman. They walked off together, very close, but not touching—alert to fight if necessary?
Rebecca was still up and told Elizabeth cheerfully that there was supper hot in the kitchen. Elizabeth found a gigantic soup pot half full of thick beef and barley soup, a huge loaf of bread, and jars of five different flavors of jam to go with the bread.
Hungry, Elizabeth ladled soup into a bowl and threw a piece of bread on top of it. “How does Ronan afford to feed all of you on a bouncer’s paycheck?”
Rebecca gave her a nonchalant shrug. “I guess we’re good shoppers.”
“Sorry,” Elizabeth said quickly. “It’s none of my business.”
“No worries.” Rebecca caught up a large purse. “Speaking of that, I need to go out. Will you watch Olaf for me? He’s usually asleep by now, but he’s a little keyed up because you and Mabel are staying here. He likes company. Cherie’s spending the night with a friend, and I don’t want to leave him alone.”
“Sure,” Elizabeth said readily.
Rebecca hesitated. “If you’d rather not, I can wait for Ronan.”
Elizabeth took a bite of soup and found it delicious. “No, no. That’s fine. I like Olaf. You go . . . shop.” When all the stores are closed. Hmm.
“Thanks.” Rebecca breezed out, banging the door behind her.
Olaf was in the living room watching television. The TV was an old model—no flat screens or HD for Shifters. A rerun of a seventies comedy was playing. Olaf wasn’t so much watching it as standing in front of the screen, staring at the people on it as though trying to figure out what on earth they were doing.
“I like this one,” Elizabeth said. “One of the ladies I lived with when I was little loved this show. She was nice.” In retrospect Elizabeth knew she should have been kinder to the woman, but Elizabeth had been so afraid of being split up from Mabel that she’d been prickly and defensive. The sweet old lady had understood that, Elizabeth saw now.
Olaf listened as though Elizabeth imparted great wisdom, then he abandoned the television and climbed up onto the sofa beside her. Olaf was nine, Ronan had said, but he acted younger. Maybe because Shifters matured at a much slower rate than humans, or maybe because Olaf had been through a lot.
As Olaf seated himself against Elizabeth, she noted that his white-blond hair bore tiny blue streaks. Mabel.
Elizabeth was tired, but she was happy to eat the terrific soup and have the warmth of Olaf beside her. This reminded her of what she and Mabel would do in the bad old days, sitting tightly side-by-side as though that would keep them together forever. I won’t ever let us be split up, Mabel. I promise.
She’d kept her promise, no matter what.
When the show ended, and Elizabeth set down her empty bowl, Olaf climbed down from the sofa, calmly removed his clothes, and shifted. He did it too close to the coffee table, which got shoved over, but Elizabeth found herself looking at the cutest polar bear cub she’d ever seen.
Not that she’d seen many, not this close. Olaf made a little baby growl then climbed back onto the sofa, his long claws tearing the fabric. He flopped down next to Elizabeth, put his head and one paw on Elizabeth’s lap, and closed his eyes.
Elizabeth went still, the trust Olaf was showing both stunning and warming her.
Olaf stirred a little, then let out his breath, eyes closing more tightly. Elizabeth couldn’t stop herself from stroking his fur. She found it both soft and strong, sort of wiry without being tough.
Elizabeth went on petting him, finding comfort in the act. Olaf’s breath whuffed hot over her blue-jeaned knee, the cub relaxing into sleep.
Rebecca didn’t return. Elizabeth lifted the remote and switched off the television, and silence crept over the house. They didn’t have any clocks in here, so nothing ticked. There was only the quiet of the outside world, the faint breeze through the open window. Austin summers were hot and sticky, but the coming fall could be cool and clean.
She was still sitting there, Olaf half on her lap, when Ronan came in.
CHAPTER 9
Again, Elizabeth was struck with how quiet he was. When he’d charged Marquez in her store, she hadn’t heard a thing until he’d reached them.
Ronan saw Olaf sleeping, closed his mouth on the greeting he’d been about to give her, and stepped inside. A cool breeze stirred wind chimes on the porch and wafted through the windows.
“Where’s Mabel?” Elizabeth whispered.
“With Cherie. I took her to Cherie’s friend’s. Two doors down.”
“Connor?”
Ronan righted the coffee table, which had been left on its side, and put her empty bowl back on it. Nothing had broken, at least. “Took him home. Scott’s staying over at the Morrisseys tonight too, so it will be less crowded here. Becks went out?”
“She implied shopping, but nothing’s open this late.”
“Means she’s prowling. Becks is past ready to mate, but she’s being very picky.”
“What about Ellison? He seems like he’d be willing.”
Ronan grimaced. “Goddess, I hope not. He’s a Lupine. That’s all I’d need, half-wolf, half-bear Shifters al
l over the place, full of themselves, like Ellison.”
“How would that work?” Elizabeth remained still as Ronan collapsed on the sofa next to her, stretching into a sprawl. Olaf never moved. “How can a Shifter be half wolf, half bear?”
“Wouldn’t. The cubs would be born in human shape and then take their animal form a few years later. They’ll go one way or the other, so a Lupine-Ursine mating could have half the family wolves and half bears. That would be interesting.”
Elizabeth gave Olaf another soft stroke. “Olaf’s already big. What’s going to happen when he’s fully grown? Polar bears are gigantic.”
“And Shifter polar bears are even bigger.” Ronan stretched his arm across the back of the sofa, touching her shoulders. “We’ll deal with that when we need to. Rebecca and Cherie might be mated and gone by the time he reaches full size. I built the Den to be plenty big.”
“For Olaf?”
“Built it before he came. But sure.”
“None of this fazes you.”
Ronan cupped Elizabeth’s shoulder with his big hand. He smelled like the night overlaid with the warmth of himself. “None of what?”
“Having cubs live in your house. Saving me from being shot. Having me and Mabel move in. Mate-claiming me so Liam would stop asking me questions.”
He moved with his shrug. “I take things as they come.”
“Most people don’t. Most people stress out. I know I do.”
Ronan regarded her with calm, dark eyes. “I lived a long time alone. You learn to take life slowly when you live like that. Why worry about what terrible thing will happen tomorrow?”
“Don’t you think worrying helps you prepare?”
“Maybe. Or maybe it just messes you up.”
Ronan had a point, but Elizabeth at age nine had realized that if she didn’t take care of Mabel, no one else would.
“Mabel almost died when she was a baby because the foster mother we lived with wouldn’t take her to the hospital. Too lazy and too drunk, but Mabel was really sick. I tried to steal the neighbor’s car and take her there, but the neighbor caught me. Fortunately, he was a nice guy, and drove us there himself. He was a fireman, and he knew people in the emergency room. Good thing.” Elizabeth laughed a little. “I was a shrimp and couldn’t reach the pedals.”
Ronan’s eyes held anger. “I hope you didn’t stay with that woman.”
“No, we were moved. I never did learn the fireman’s name, and I never saw him again. But he made me realize there were good people and bad people out there. You have to figure out which is which, but good ones are there. Like you.”
Elizabeth put her hand on Ronan’s where he rested it on her shoulder, her fingers small against his big, blunt ones.
“What makes you think I’m one of the good ones?” he asked.
“You stopped Marquez, for one. He had a gun—you couldn’t know whether he’d have shot you dead. And letting us stay here, eating your food and taking up space. And what you do for the kids—I mean, the cubs.” Elizabeth stroked Olaf’s fur again. “I’d have been able to tell right away if you mistreated them. But I know they’re happy.”
Ronan spread his fingers and twined hers between them. “You were like them, weren’t you?”
“A rescue case? Pretty much. Only I never got rescued. There were good times, don’t get me wrong. It wasn’t all terrible. We lived in some good houses, made friends.”
“You rescued yourself, Lizzie,” Ronan said. He squeezed her fingers, the pressure warm. “But I don’t mind coming to your rescue.”
Elizabeth squeezed back, feeling the warmth travel all the way through her body. “Why did you stop Liam from questioning me?”
“Because Liam’s dangerous,” Ronan said. “He and Sean have that Irish charm thing going, but don’t underestimate them. They can be hard-ass if they want to be, and their dad’s worse. Me mate-claiming you means you’ll never be handed over to their dad. It means I’ve got your back.”
With his strong arm behind her shoulders, Elizabeth started to believe it.
“I promise you, Ronan, my secrets won’t hurt anyone except me and Mabel. It’s because of Mabel that I don’t want to tell you.”
“WitSec?” Ronan asked.
Elizabeth started. “What?”
“Are you in witness protection? I won’t out you, but I don’t need a Fed breathing down my neck when one comes looking for you.”
“No.” She shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut. “Call it Elizabeth protection.” She opened her eyes again. “Yes, I moved here six years ago with a new name and a new name for Mabel, but not because I’m running from the law or in witness protection or because I owe people lot of money. I just needed . . . to start again.”
He regarded her quietly, keeping whatever emotions he felt hidden. “People can start again without changing their identities. Usually they change identities when they don’t want anyone from their past finding them.”
Elizabeth said nothing. Ronan was close to the truth, but Elizabeth had learned the hard way that saying nothing was the best thing, no matter what it made people think of her. If she opened up to Ronan, would Liam compel him to tell Elizabeth’s secrets? He’d said that this mate-claim protected her from that, but she was sure the smooth-talking Liam would probably find some loophole. Liam seemed to be good at getting his own way.
But Ronan, she’d seen, despite his brawn and good-natured banter, was not stupid. He studied her now with shrewd perception. “You don’t have to tell me, Elizabeth. You wait until you’re ready. And if it’s never, then it’s never.”
“It won’t be never.”
Ronan brought their clasped hands up and rubbed her cheek with his broad finger. “The bears in this house have been through a lot. I’ve learned not to force them to talk about it. You take your time.”
Elizabeth turned her head to find herself nose-to-nose with him. “I used to be a very bad judge of character, is all.” Elizabeth slid her hand to his neck, playing with the ends of his very short hair. She liked how it felt, prickly but soft, like Olaf’s fur. Under that was his Collar, warm metal fused to his neck. “But I’ve become much better at it,” she said softly.
“And I’m one of the good ones?”
For answer, Elizabeth leaned in and kissed him.
It started as a small kiss, a thank-you kiss, but Ronan’s big hand came around her neck, and he slanted his mouth over hers. His answering kiss was strong, warm, responsive.
Elizabeth parted her lips, her body tightening as his tongue swept into her mouth. His strength took her breath away, but he gentled it for her, holding back. Holding back a lot. The wildness in him, tempered for her, excited her.
He kissed slowly, firmly, his lips smooth. Elizabeth let her fingers slide down his back, finding muscles so solid they didn’t give under her fingers. His hand on her neck never moved, as though he held her up, as though she’d never fall as long as he was with her.
Elizabeth moved closer. She kissed him hungrily, needing to know he’d hold her up forever.
On her lap, Olaf stirred and emitted a little growl.
Ronan eased from the kiss but didn’t release her. He held her, their faces almost touching, his eyes so dark. A spark winked deep within them.
I can take care of myself. This was Elizabeth’s constant mantra. But wouldn’t it be wonderful to surrender to strength such as Ronan had, to know she would be safe—for always?
“We should put him to bed,” Ronan said.
Olaf. He was warm on her lap, sleeping soundly. Elizabeth didn’t want to let him go.
“You have a bed for baby polar bears?”
“He’ll shift back.”
Ronan pressed a last, soft kiss to Elizabeth’s mouth, rose, and lifted Olaf. The cub didn’t move and didn’t change shape. Ronan signaled to Elizabeth to follow, and he carried the bear out of the living room and up the stairs.
The largest front room was taken by the two male cubs and held the detritus o
f boys of two ages: magazines, CDs, posters, toy trucks, action figures. No video games and no TV, because Shifters weren’t allowed much technology. A small computer stood in one corner, an older model. That was all.
Both beds were fairly big and very sturdy. Elizabeth saw why when Ronan laid Olaf on one. He curled up, the claws of one paw slicing the cover of the pillow. From all the rents on the pillow, he’d done that more than once.
Ronan dragged a cover over him. “If he shifts back in his sleep, he’ll get cold,” he explained. He lingered to rest his large hand on Olaf’s shoulder.
Under his touch, Olaf took a deep breath, and then shifted effortlessly back to the small boy with blue-streaked blond hair. He opened his eyes. “Lizbeth?”
“I’m right here.” Elizabeth leaned down and kissed his cheek. “Good night, Olaf.”
Olaf caught her hand in a surprisingly strong grip. “Stay.”
“She’s got to go to bed, Olaf,” Ronan said. “She’s tired.”
Olaf’s eyes took on a glint of panic Elizabeth had sometimes seen in Mabel’s when Mabel had been little. Mabel’s greatest terror had been that she’d go to sleep and wake up alone, Elizabeth gone, never to be found again. Olaf, Ronan had said, had seen his parents killed. That terror had come true for him.
“No,” Olaf said. “Stay.”
“It’s all right.” Elizabeth sat down on the large bed, Olaf not letting go of her hand. “I don’t mind. He’s scared.”
“He has to learn he’ll be all right,” Ronan said.
Olaf’s grip tightened even more. He would have wrestler strength when he grew up, greater maybe even than Ronan’s.
“Does he have to learn tonight? I don’t mind.”
Ronan stood over them, hands on hips, a frustrated parent. “All right, all right. But only tonight.”
Elizabeth lay down on the bed behind Olaf and pulled the cover over her, kicking her loose shoes to the floor. Olaf snuggled back against her and looked up at Ronan.
“Stay too,” he said.
Ronan heaved a sigh. “Becks is spoiling you. Fine, big guy. We’ll both stay.”
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