Showmance

by L.H. Cosway

  He frowned. “We have a few minutes.”

  “No, I…I’m just not in the right frame of mind to talk now, but at lunch I promise we will. I’ll explain everything.”

  “There’s nothing to explain.”

  “At lunch, Damon,” I stated firmly, shooting him a meaningful look before heading back out into the studio. Almost the entire cast was there, and I noticed Alicia in a far corner chatting with a few of the dancers. I quickly took note of where Blake was and did my utmost to avoid him. When Damon joined us, he went to talk with Eddie, and then I saw Jacob approaching him with Blake. He began introducing them, and though I couldn’t hear what was being said, I saw Damon’s posture go decidedly rigid. He’d never met Blake before, but he’d already decided he didn’t like him because of how he’d treated me. The thought gave me a warm feeling in my belly.

  I felt like I was holding my breath the entire time they spoke, and I could have killed to know what was being said. Trying to stem my curiosity, I started stretching, and a few minutes later, Iggy was there, calling everybody to order. They all began taking their places as he came to whisper in my ear, “Have you seen Bob’s replacement?”

  I nodded and spoke quietly. “Yes, and I’ll be doing my best to avoid him. I don’t know what Jacob was thinking casting him anyway. Blake’s far too suave to be the Duke. The Duke is a snivelling weasel, not to mention old.”

  “Quiet now, Rose. I might begin to think you care,” Iggy chided me. “And anyway, the whole point of acting is to portray a range of characters. He’s hardly going to play himself, now, is he?”

  Iggy’s logic peeved me off, but I didn’t let it show. Jacob, his assistants and Maura, sat at their table at the head of the studio, while Iggy and I went to stand in front of the cast. Almost as though I could feel his eyes on me, my attention was unwittingly dragged toward Blake, who stared at me like he’d just noticed a friend he hadn’t seen in a while. The bastard even had the gall to smile, like we were tight. Bosom buddies. Old pals.

  He was in for a rude awakening.

  I kept my expression blank, and his brow furrowed as he mouthed my name questioningly, Rosie? The nickname I’d once thought adorable now caused bile to rise in my throat.

  “Take note of your places, everybody, and please stay on your marks. Eddie, I want you up here in front. We’ll start with ‘Lady Marmalade’ and then move on to ‘Because We Can.’ I want you all on your toes,” said Iggy loudly before he counted us down and began calling out steps. I noticed he wasn’t in the best mood today, and the cast suffered a gruelling morning because of it.

  “Maggie! You’re about a foot off your mark. Please, we don’t have time for this,” he barked at one of the dancers. She looked like a rabbit caught in the headlights, so I went to help her find her footing. As I moved through the dancers, I passed by Damon and our arms grazed, setting all of my tiniest hairs on end. It was revelatory, the effect his touch had on me, and I still had no idea what I was going to say to him at lunch.

  Jacob called for a fifteen-minute break, and I grabbed my coat and purse to head to the nearest coffee shop. It was as I was leaving the building that somebody caught hold of my elbow, stopping me in my stride. I turned to find Blake’s clear blue eyes staring back at me, and I momentarily wanted to vomit.

  “Rosie, it’s me, Blake,” he said, like it had been years since we’d last seen each other instead of weeks.

  “Yes, I know who you are, Blake. I haven’t undergone a lobotomy since the closing night of Guys and Dolls.” He’d played the lead role of Nathan Detroit, a high-rolling gambler. His affected New York accent had been rocky at best.

  “Okay,” he said, eyeing me shrewdly as he pulled the cigarette from behind his ear and lit up. “You’re pissed at me, I get it. I acted like a world-class prick to you before, and I’m sorry.”

  “It’s in the past. I’d rather not discuss it,” I said, and began walking again. Blake followed, easily keeping pace with my quick strides.

  “I didn’t know you were working on this show,” he told me.

  I laughed bitterly. I also found that hard to believe since rehearsals were taking place in Iggy’s studio. Still, I didn’t bother arguing about it. Instead I gave him as much attitude as I could muster. “Of course you didn’t. I doubt you would’ve agreed to the role if you’d known. Wouldn’t want to have to go through the bother of being nice to an old notch on your bedpost.”

  “I still would have taken it, Rosie. It’s a good part. Admittedly, I’d prefer to play the lead, but it seems that role has already been cast.”

  I snickered at the idea of him even thinking about usurping Damon. Dancing aside, Blake didn’t even come close to the kind of star power and charisma Damon had in his little finger.

  We reached the coffee shop, and I held the door open. “Look, Blake, I have no interest in rekindling our friendship, or whatever it was we had, but I’m prepared to be civil to you if you’ll be civil in return. That way we can both do our jobs and not be tiptoeing around each other for the next four months.”

  Blake took a drag of his smoke and exhaled. He watched me for a second, as though trying to decide if I was playing some kind of game. “All right, civility it is. And I mean it when I say it’s good to see you, Rosie. You look great.”

  I didn’t respond to his compliment, only nodded and turned to go inside. Putting in my order for a small flat white, I glanced back outside to see he’d gone. My breath whooshed out of me, and I felt relieved that the encounter was over. I wouldn’t put it past him to try waiting outside to walk me back, wheedle his way into my affections again so he could fool me into another night of meaningless sex.

  When I returned to the studio, I instantly spotted Damon sitting on a chair by the window. Alicia was perched on the ledge before him as she took a sip from a bottle of water. He said something, and she giggled loudly. Normally I wouldn’t be so affected by the scene, but after talking with Blake, I was wired and tense. Therefore, seeing Alicia acting flirtatious with Damon made me violently jealous.

  Speak of the devil, Blake stood in a group, but his eyes were on me. He seemed to notice where I was looking, and a curious expression crossed his face. I quickly went to stow away my coat and purse. The last thing I needed was Blake interfering in what was between Damon and me.

  We got straight back to rehearsing, and by the time lunch came around, I was ready to collapse into bed and go to sleep. It was a good thing the cast would be running lines for the afternoon session. I could go home and relax, but not before I shared a quick lunch with Damon. I’d promised him we’d talk, and I’d never be mean enough to stand him up.

  Ten.

  *Damon*

  It was a strange morning, and it only got stranger when I went to use the bathroom and bumped into Blake the arsehole. It seemed appropriate to be standing in the shitter. I’d just zipped up my fly when he walked inside, rubbing at the scruff on his jaw in agitation. I didn’t have anything to say to him, so I kept my mouth shut.

  I did wish he’d quit standing there though, watching me. It was beginning to create an atmosphere, and atmospheres made me want to lash out. It was one of the main reasons why I spent so much time on my own. There was less chance of me doing irritating fuckers a mischief.

  “So, Rose, eh?” he said, looking at me through the mirror as I washed my hands.

  I only cocked a brow in response and turned off the tap. The bloke had been nothing but friendly when Jacob introduced us earlier, but now there was an air of hostility about him, and he could fuck right off if he thought I was gonna bite.

  He let out a low chuckle at my continued silence and went on, “You might not know this, but we used to have a thing, Rosie and me.”

  “Good for you,” I muttered, and turned to leave.

  “Ah, he speaks,” Blake declared, and I suddenly wanted to punch the sod. “Look, I’m not trying to a dick — ”

  “No?” I interrupted, and he laughed.

  “No. In fact
, I’d like us to be mates. It’ll be a long old three-month stint when this thing finally goes to stage if we’re both hating on each other.”

  “I don’t hate you. I don’t know you,” I replied evenly.

  He let out a long, over-exaggerated sigh. “Let’s cut the bullshit, shall we? I’ve been asking around, and apparently you and Rose are tight. And since I know her so well, I know she wears her heart on her sleeve and has probably told you all about what happened between us.”

  When I didn’t respond, he barked another amused laugh. “So that’s how it’s gonna be, eh? Look, I just wanted to tell you that I’m not here to cause upset. In fact, I’ve had a lot of time to think these past few weeks, and I want to make things up to Rose.”

  “Fair dues, mate,” I said, mildly sarcastic. I didn’t believe his bullshit for a second. Sometimes you just met people who made your hackles rise. Blake was one of those people. I moved to leave again, but he sidestepped into my path for the second time. I lost my patience. He opened his mouth to speak, but I glowered at him, taking a step forward into his space. I was a few inches taller, which made it easy to glare down as I crowded him.

  “Move,” I grunted.

  Blake raised his hands in the air but did as I ordered.

  “I know you don’t like me, Damon, but you’ll change your mind, you mark my words,” he said in a sincere voice before finally letting me pass. I very much doubted that, but I let him have the final say all the same.

  I really didn’t know what to make of him, and couldn’t be sure if he was trying to tell me he wanted to win Rose back, or if he genuinely wanted to be buddies. I was so preoccupied with these thoughts that I left the studio and was sitting on a park bench ten minutes away when I remembered I was supposed to meet her for lunch. Fuck.

  Pulling my phone from my pocket, I quickly dialled her number. It rang out with no answer, so I called again. This time she picked up on the third ring.

  “Damon,” she said, sounding breathless. “I’m just leaving now, but I can’t find you.”

  Lifting a hand, I scratched at my chin and answered. “Yeah, I’m a bloody space cadet. I’ve already left. I forgot — ”

  “No, no, don’t worry. It’s fine.” She cut me off, sounding relieved, if I was being honest. “We can do lunch some other time. Iggy’s offered to drive me home and I’m wrecked, so I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

  I half-smiled. “This a brush-off?”

  “No, of course not,” she hurried to answer. She sounded like she was afraid she’d hurt my feelings. “I just…I guess I’m just trying to delay the inevitable.”

  “You really know how to make a bloke feel wanted,” I joked, and I could imagine her fluster on the other end of the line.

  “Oh, God, I’m saying all the wrong things today. It’s Blake. I’m certain of it. The moment he showed his face this morning, my wiring got scrambled.”

  I tried to ease her embarrassment as I assured her gently, “Hey, you can handle Blake, Rose.”

  “Yeah, well,” she sighed. “Tell that to the turmoil in my tummy. The idea of working with him on this show makes me want to vomit.”

  Frowning, I shifted the phone into my other hand and said, “I don’t want you to feel cornered. I can talk to Jacob, ask that he cast someone else.”

  “You’d do that for me?” she whispered, taken aback.

  “Aye. Remember the first day I got here and you helped me even though I was a rude old git?”

  “Yes.” She was still whispering.

  “Well, I don’t forget kindnesses like that, petal. You’ve got a friend in me whenever you need one.”

  A pregnant silence fell between us, and I could almost hear her thoughts churning.

  “Don’t talk to Jacob, just…if I ever need a friend during rehearsals, be there. You’re surprisingly good at bolstering my confidence, Damon Atwood.”

  The tone of her voice told me she was smiling, and my chest puffed up with pride that I’d made her feel better.

  “I’m here whenever you need me,” I promised.

  “Thank you,” she replied. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  She was about to hang up when I said, “Wait.”

  “Yes?”

  I coughed, uncertainty making me hesitate. “Come over for a brew later.”

  Her voice showed I’d taken her by surprise. “Oh, um, over to your place?”

  “Aye.”

  “Ah, okay, sure. I’ll text and let you know when I can make it.”

  “’Bye, Rose.”

  “Goodbye, Damon.”

  She ended the call, and I slid my phone back in my pocket. Nearby movement caught my attention, and I looked across the park to see the same gaggle of photographers from the other night, the ones who’d been snapping shots of me at the barber’s. I was seeing them around more and more, and it was beginning to get on my goat.

  I didn’t want this kind of attention.

  Getting up, I shoved my hands in my coat pockets and left the park. I ate a quiet lunch in a nearby café before returning to the studio for the afternoon session. The second I walked inside Alicia was there, sliding her arm through mine and leading me into one of the practice rooms. It was starting to become clear that she had an interest in me that wasn’t entirely platonic. And truthfully, I should have been over the moon, because she was beautiful, but she just wasn’t Rose. She didn’t calm me, nor did she make me feel like I could trust her unconditionally.

  I hadn’t lied on Friday when I’d told Rose she was the only person I really wanted to spend time with. I was already wishing away the next few hours so I could finally go home and see her.

  “I have this piano at the apartment I’m renting, but the thing is huge,” said Alicia, her arm still linked with mine. “I was wondering if you could come over later and help me move it. You’ve got big arms — I bet you’re great at moving furniture around.”

  “Afraid I’ve got plans,” I told her, and noticed Blake standing with Jacob and Eddie. His eyes were on me. He gestured to Alicia and then mouthed the word niiiccce, like we were pals and he was complimenting me on being arm in arm with a gorgeous bird. The bloke was living on another planet.

  “Oh, no,” Alicia pouted, affecting a sad expression. “How about tomorrow, then?”

  “I — ”

  “What’s happening tomorrow?” someone interrupted. Blake had come to join us.

  “Hello, Blake, isn’t it?” said Alicia in a pleasant voice. “I’m Alicia, and Damon here has kindly offered to help me move the piano in my apartment tomorrow, haven’t you, Damon?”

  “I’m not sure….”

  “How very kind of you,” said Blake, and I gritted my teeth. I could barely get a word in with these two, and it was difficult not to just grunt something rude and walk off. I wasn’t out on a boat and these people weren’t foulmouthed fishermen. This was a completely different world, full of urbanity and false pleasantries. There was a small part of me that truly hated it.

  Now Blake winked. “I bet you’ll move her piano real good.”

  Fucking prick.

  Alicia tittered a laugh, and I was sure I must have looked unimpressed. Before I could say more, Jacob was rounding everybody up. The rest of the afternoon passed quickly, and I was happy not to have to talk to Blake again, aside from when we had dialogue together. Acting was easy for me, real-life conversations less so. And that was before you even added the fact that I had cause to dislike him. The guy had been with Rose. He’d put his hands on her. I just couldn’t seem to look at him and not want to punch him for it.

  By the time I got home that evening, I felt like I could breathe again. I’d changed into some comfortable jeans and a loose jumper when my phone buzzed with a text.

  Rose: Are you home yet? I can come over now if you’re not too tired…

  Damon: I’m home. Come over. I’ll put the kettle on.

  Rose: Okay. See you in a few :-)

  The hazy drunken memory of my tongue on her ne
ck entered my head, and I groaned. I should have kissed her then while I had the chance, but I’d been too preoccupied with her skin; it had felt so soft. The problem with me was that when alcohol was involved, all my inhibitions flew out the window, and they certainly had on Friday night.

  Fuck, what had I even said to her?

  She’d tasted like sunshine, and the sound of her gasping, the subtle intake of breath, made me harder than I’d ever been. My balls tightened just remembering it. The second I arrived home that night, I’d had to take a long, hot shower while relieving myself of my need.

  Christ, I really had to think of something else right now or I’d be sporting a massive stiffy when I answered the door. Some of my things were lying around, so I did a quick clean-up. About ten minutes later there was a tentative knock, and I’d thankfully calmed down from wanting to shag her silly.

  Opening the door, I found Rose in her light brown pea coat, her hair windswept and her cheeks reddened from the cold.

  “Come in,” I said, and she stepped inside. “It’s biting out there.”

  “Tell me about it,” she agreed, unwinding the purple knit scarf from around her neck. “The entire walk here I was fantasising about cosy open fires.”

  I led her into the kitchen, suddenly struck by a vision of her sitting by the fire in my cottage back in Skye, wearing a shirt of mine and nothing else.

  Okay. I really had to get a handle on this fantasy business.

  Rose took a seat at the small table by the window while I went about making the tea. Every couple of seconds my eyes went to her. She sat back in the chair, emitted a tired breath, and began fiddling with her hair. Pulling it out of its knot, she ran her fingers through the strands, then fixed it back up again. She must have sensed me looking because her attention flicked to me, and I almost scalded myself with hot water as I quickly pretended I hadn’t been ogling.

  “How did the afternoon rehearsals go?” she asked. “I hope Blake didn’t give you any trouble.”

  I affected a bland expression. “Why would he?”

  She grew flustered. “I don’t know. Never mind.”