Shelby tried to find the words, but her mind was a blank screen. “So will you let me know when you get moved in?”
“Yeah. Hey, listen, I’ve gotta go. The UPS guy is here.”
He hung up.
Shelby plopped down in her living room chair, and Penelope jumped up in her lap. While her thoughts ran the gamut, she stroked Penelope’s fur. It was one thing to have to call her dad now and then. It was quite another to have him fifty miles away.
But why was she worried? It wasn’t as though he would come to see her. He might be fifty miles away, but she wouldn’t know it any more than if he still lived in Florida. Her dad kept to himself.
Always.
“So did you learn anything, squirt?” Nick asked, ruffling Willow’s hair after Shelby’s first class. Once he had apparently realized he’d have to pick and choose his battles, he’d given in to her pleading to attend.
“Don’t, Daddy.” Willow smoothed her hair down.
Nick shared a glance with Shelby that seemed to say, What did I do? She’d have to tell him later that girls didn’t like getting their hair messed up.
“Tell him what you learned, Willow,” Shelby said.
“A lady has good posture, sits and stands properly, and walks gracefully.” Willow demonstrated as she talked, and she and Shelby giggled.
Nick’s jaw dropped. “You mean there’s a right and wrong way to do all that?”
Shelby laughed. “Yes, Nick, there is.”
He scratched his jaw. “I suppose I’ve been doing it wrong all these years. How’s this?” He grabbed Shelby’s purse and walked across the room, hand on his hip, with a feminine swing to his strut.
Shelby and Willow laughed, and he swiveled around.
“What? Didn’t I do it right?”
“Oh, you. You’re making fun of us,” Shelby said, gathering her things.
“Just teasing.” He grinned. “How about we go into the house for some hot apple cider?”
“That would be nice,” Shelby said, intensely aware that Nick’s hand was on the small of her back as he escorted her to his house, with Willow walking beside them.
Warmth from the crackling fire greeted her the moment she entered the front door.
“Now before you get any ideas, I started the fire in the fireplace just before I came out to get you guys. I know better than to leave a fire going when we’re out of the house,” Nick said.
“I never doubted it,” Shelby said.
Nick’s house was positively lovely with its rustic charm.
The more she saw it, the more it appealed to her. Normally she preferred the frilly things of life, it was true, yet there was a simple beauty to his log cabin that she hadn’t appreciated before.
The fact that he’d left Willow’s decorations in place touched Shelby.
Spiced cider scented the room, splashing the air with the true aroma of autumn. Michael Bublé’s voice sang softly from the CD player.
“This is nice, Nick. Really nice.”
“Thanks,” he said, pulling down mugs from his cupboard.
“And you didn’t think you were a good dad,” Shelby said, easing onto one of the stools at the counter.
“Good dad?” He looked confused.
“You know, going to all this trouble for Willow. Spiced cider and all that. That’s really sweet and thoughtful.”
“Oh, uh, yeah.”
Shelby wondered at the confusion on his face, but quickly forgot it as she took in the surroundings.
“Here you are,” he said, passing her a mug of steaming hot cider.
“Wait. Are you wearing a new sweater?” Shelby couldn’t believe her eyes. Nick normally wore sweatshirts and T-shirts; she rarely saw him in a nice sweater other than at church.
“You mean my wardrobe is so sparse you notice when I buy a new sweater?”
Shelby took a tiny sip from her mug. “I’m afraid so,” she said with a teasing grin. “It looks nice with your eyes.”
“Really?” He stood taller and batted his lashes. “Guess I’ll have to wear it more often.”
She chuckled. Did she imagine it, or did his eyes linger on her a little longer than necessary?
He coughed, then turned his attention to one of the mugs. “Willow, your cider is ready,” he called out.
Willow settled in the living room and watched something on television while Nick and Shelby stayed at the kitchen table. Nick stared into his mug.
“Something wrong?”
“Oh, just wondering how I can generate some more money. I know the Lord will provide, but with Willow coming up on her teen years, I know life’s about to get expensive.” He took a drink from his mug.
“That’s true.” Shelby thought a moment. “Have you considered adding events to your farm?”
“What do you mean?”
“You know, hayrides, hot chocolate with Santa, pumpkin hunts, educational tours to stir up interest, that sort of thing?”
Nick stared at her.
“What?”
“How’d you get so smart?”
Shelby laughed. “Haven’t you heard of such things through the Christmas Tree Farm Association?”
“Yeah, I guess I have. Just didn’t need the hassle of it all.
But with the mill closing, I won’t be selling as much lumber, so I guess I need to consider it. It would bring in more outsiders if I offered those things. You know, people outside of Smitten.”
“And you would be helping to save the town, all at the same time.” She smiled, hoping she hadn’t offended him.
“Yeah. My manly contribution.” He winked.
They talked awhile longer of different ways he could spruce up his farm. Though Shelby always enjoyed spending time with Nick, tonight seemed special somehow. She didn’t want to look at why yet. Maybe later. Taking in the sweet spicy aroma of the cider and soaking in the pleasure of Nick’s company made her wish she didn’t have to go home to an empty house.
Willow stepped into the kitchen, dressed in her pajamas.
“Whoa,” Nick said. “Don’t you think it’s a little rude to put on your pajamas while we have company? That company being the lady of etiquette, no less?”
Shelby laughed. “Oh, come on, I’m not that snooty.”
Willow looked at her dad. “It’s Shelby, Dad. She’s not company. She’s family.”
Shelby nearly dropped her mug. It seemed the whole world paused with Willow’s statement. Nick’s gaze locked with hers.
“I guess she is, at that.”
Were her hands shaking? And she couldn’t swallow. It was as though she had a ball of cotton in her mouth. Was she getting sick?
“If you’ll excuse me, may I use your bathroom?”
“Sure, it’s right in there.” Nick pointed the way.
Shelby eased her way into the room, closing the door behind her. She leaned against the wall a moment to catch her breath. Finally she pulled a handkerchief from her pocketbook, dampened it with water, and wiped the back of her neck.
What was the matter with her? She mentally went over what she had eaten during the day. It couldn’t be lack of food.
Then she remembered the feel of Nick’s hand on her back. The look in his eyes when Willow paid her such a high compliment—well, it unsettled her, that was all. She was reading something into it that wasn’t there.
Turning on the faucet, she dampened her cloth some more and dotted her face. She looked at herself in the mirror.
“What is the matter with you?” she whispered to her reflection. “He’s your friend. That’s it.” She paused, still staring at her reflection. “And besides that, he has whiskers!”
She took a deep breath and prepared to leave the room with her mind made up. She would do absolutely nothing to jeopardize her friendship with Nick.
No matter what her changing heart told her.
CHAPTER SIX
You all right this morning?” Natalie asked, breathless, as they jogged around the river walk, Reese’s exe
rcise of choice.
Birds chirped and plumped their feathers in the cool morning air.
“Yeah, why?” Shelby jumped over a bump on the path.
They were barely into their jog and already she had to shed her jacket. She hated to sweat.
“I was about to ask the same thing,” Reese said. “You’re awful quiet today.”
“Just got a lot on my mind.” If they only knew . . . but Shelby wasn’t about to tell them. How could she when she didn’t know herself? Besides, she didn’t have enough breath to talk and jog at the same time.
“Like what?” Julia asked. “We spill our guts to you—it’s only fair that you should do the same.”
Shelby laughed. “That’s Julia. Cuts right to the heart of the matter.” She took a deep breath—for survival. “Well, I talked to my dad, and I guess he’s moving up here now. Not to Smitten, but close by.” Another breath. “In fact, now that I think about it, he didn’t say exactly where. About fifty miles north.”
“Is that a problem?” Natalie asked.
“We’ve just never been . . . close.” She hadn’t talked much with her friends about the relationship—or lack thereof—that she had with her dad.
“Well, at least he won’t be in town. It’s not like you’ll be around him all the time,” Reese said.
“Yeah, I guess.”
“There’s more. I can hear it in your voice,” Natalie said.
“It’s called lack of oxygen,” Shelby said.
They laughed.
“Dad and I have a history. Not a very good one.”
“Have you prayed about it?” Natalie asked.
“Yes.”
“Don’t stop. God is working.”
Shelby just nodded. She wondered how much God could work when she was holding back. But what was she holding back? She’d already forgiven her father for making her have the abortion, hadn’t she? And for the way he ignored her after that, as though he couldn’t stand the sight of her because of her “sin.” God had forgiven her, but her dad couldn’t seem to do it.
“Did you hear me?” Reese said.
“What? I’m sorry. Still thinking about Dad,” Shelby said.
“I wanted to know how it was going, working at Nick’s place.”
She wished they’d quit making her talk. At this rate, she’d need an oxygen tank before the jog was over. “It’s going all right. He said I could bring my sewing machine to the building and work there while Griffen works on my house. All that noise and dust is driving me crazy.”
“Is he still helping Griffen?” Julia asked.
“Every now and then.” Her pulse kicked up a notch—most likely from the jogging, but she wasn’t completely convinced.
She couldn’t imagine what was going on in her that was changing her feelings toward Nick. No matter what, she had to let it go. He thought of her as a mere friend, and if she made him uncomfortable, she’d lose his friendship. She couldn’t bear the thought. Forcing her mind to stop rambling, she looked up to see the girls looking at her.
“What?”
“Oh, nothing,” Reese said. “Nothing at all.” A smirk played at the corner of Reese’s mouth. Shelby ignored it.
“How’s the spa business, Julia?” Shelby asked.
“Going okay. I’ve had a few women come in who said they were in town for their honeymoon. They wanted to see the place where the famous Sawyer Smitten was getting married.”
“Woo-hoo, that’s what we want to hear,” Natalie said. “Word’s getting out! I’ve had some couples coming into the coffee shop from out of town too. So fun to watch people in love.”
“Have you given them any of your gluten-free cookies?”
Julia asked.
“No.”
“Don’t.” Julia, Shelby, and Reese all spoke at once.
“Hey!”
“Just kidding,” Shelby said. “But maybe wait till you get them perfected.”
“I’m getting closer every day,” Natalie said. “Hey, Reese, have you thought about the Palmer building for your outfitters shop?”
“I was thinking about scheduling an appointment to look at it,” Reese said.
“Better not wait too long. The new Smitten will be up and running once that wedding takes place, and you’ll want to be in on the action.”
“Natalie, our eternal optimist,” Julia said, shaking her head.
“Everything hinges on that wedding,” Reese said. “It will make or break this town.”
“Things will work out, you’ll see,” Natalie said with full confidence.
These were exciting times for the town of Smitten. Shelby could feel it. She couldn’t help sensing good days were ahead for all of them—if she didn’t blow it with Nick.
Nick grabbed his jacket and went to Willow’s room to tell her he was walking in the woods, but just as he lifted his fist to rap on the door, he heard crying. He stood there a minute, not knowing what to do. He hadn’t lived with a woman for so long, he’d forgotten how to deal with them. And even then, Camilla left before their first anniversary. Willow was the only good thing to come from that marriage.
He whispered a prayer to the Lord for strength and wisdom, then knocked softly on the door. “Willow, may I come in?”
There was a pause, and then a soft “Yes.”
When he opened the door, she was sitting on her bed, eyes red and swollen, scarlet streaks on her face. He walked over and sat down beside her. Placing her hand between his own, he looked at her.
“You want to talk about it?”
Big sloppy tears spilled over her lashes and down her cheeks. “I miss Mom.”
His heart hurt with her words. He wanted to make her all better. Make the bad stuff go away. But he couldn’t.
“I know,” he said quietly.
“She never stayed home. I always missed her. But now . . . we’ll never really get to know each other.”
“I’m sorry.” So Camilla had treated her own daughter the same way she had treated him. He’d make it up to Willow. He didn’t know how, but he would.
“Listen, I’m fairly new to this whole dad thing, but I want to do it right. It’s great to have you here with me. I want to be what you need, but I’ll make mistakes. That’s just how I am.”
Her smile in his direction melted his heart.
“Just know that no matter what, I will always love you,” he said. “Deal?”
“Deal.”
He pulled her into a strong hug, and she hugged him back. Not just any hug, but a real dad-daughter kind of hug.
The type of hug that said We’re family.
“I was just getting ready to take a walk through the trees, check on how things are doing. Want to go with me? We won’t stay real long.”
“Okay.” She grabbed a tissue from her nightstand.
“What are your plans for today?” he asked, rising to his feet.
“I thought I’d work on some more headbands for Shelby.
I’ve started crocheting a rose for one. I think she’ll like it.”
Willow walked over and pulled a half-crocheted flower out of her dresser drawer. “What do you think?”
Though he couldn’t make heads or tails of it, one look at her sweet face and he couldn’t stop gushing. “It’s beautiful.
You did this yourself?”
“Yeah.”
“Shelby will be so pleased.” He gave her a sideways hug.
“I’m proud of you, kid.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
“Grab your jacket and let’s go.”
The firs gave off their sweet aroma, filling the air with Christmas as Nick and Willow walked through the maze of trees.
“We have trees growing at varying intervals. Some were just planted this year. Others are a couple of years old, and so on.”
“How long does it take for a tree to grow big enough to become a Christmas tree?” she asked.
“About eight years.” He stopped and flipped a tag out on a tree.
�
��Do you put tags on all these yourself?”
“I have part-time people who come and help me,” Nick said. “We usually do that in September.”
“Maybe I can help next year.” She looked up at him, excitement flushing her cheeks.
“That would be great.” He reached over to rough up her hair and stopped himself.
Willow laughed. “Now you’re getting the hang of it.”
Nick laughed out loud with her. He looked around the area. “Looks like I need to mow again. Won’t be long, and I won’t have to do it again until next spring.”
“What kind of trees are these, Dad?”
“Balsam and Fraser firs.”
“I love the smell,” Willow said, taking in a deep breath.
“Yeah, me too.” Nick smiled.
“Makes me excited for Christmas.”
“I like people like you. They keep my farm going.”
“What do you do for Christmas? I mean, before I came along, did you stay by yourself or go visit Grandpa and Grandma in South Carolina?”
“Sometimes they come here. They know I can’t leave the place. Too many people want trees at the last minute. I’m busy through Christmas Eve.”
“Oh, that sounds like fun!”
“Really? That wouldn’t bother you?”
“No. I love helping other people have fun at Christmas.
I used to go to fancy parties that Grandma and Grandpa Givens or Mom set up. I hated them. There were hardly ever any kids around, and when there were, they were stuck-up and didn’t want to do anything fun.”
“Well, we’ll have to work on that. Speaking of which, have you made any friends at school?”
“Yeah, a couple.”
“Anytime you want to have someone over, it’s fine with me,” he said.
“Thanks, Dad.”
As they talked along the way, Nick stopped here and there to shear up unruly branches and carefully maintain the familiar Christmas tree shape.
“I like Shelby,” Willow said.
“Yeah, she’s a good friend.” A twig snapped beneath his boot.
“Is that all?”
“Yeah, why?”
Willow shrugged. “Just seems like you two like each other more than that.”
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