by Marie Ahls
“You know having children is important to me, Daisey,” Carter gritted out from between clenched teeth.
She nodded, not sure her voice would not crack. “I never said I didn’t want kids. I just can’t have them biologically. We can adopt.” But in her heart, she knew this wouldn’t be an option for him.
“I am a Bradshaw. We don’t adopt. I am the only male in my generation. I must have a biological child. I thought you understood.”
“But adopting a child is a wonderful way to build our family.” She twisted the elegant linen napkin in her hands, searching for the words to convince him. But she wasn’t sure there were any.
“Adoption is fine. For other people. Mother would never approve.” He reached in his jacket pocket and pulled out his wallet. Throwing a few bills on the table, he stood. “I’m very disappointed in you, Daisey.”
She sat, still as a statue, watching him walk away while her heart splintered into a thousand jagged pieces in her chest. She might have remained there forever, frozen in her despair. But a kindly waiter approached, asking if she needed assistance. She shook her head and gathered her purse and what was left of her pride. And walked out into the sultry night. It was only then she realized she didn’t have a ride home. So, she did the only thing she could. She called Caleb.
And then she sat on the wrought iron bench and allowed the pent-up tears to come. In hot waves, they flowed down her cheeks, dripping onto the fanciest dress she owned. Didn’t matter. She’d be burning it after tonight.
She didn’t have to wait long. Caleb’s SUV screeched into the parking lot to a halt in front of her. She thought she heard, “That bastard,” before his arms slipped around her. And then the tears really came.
Chapter Two
No words were spoken between them on the ride home. She’d held up one slim hand when Caleb started to say something. Silence reigned since. Daisey noticed they were in front of his house, not her condo, and didn’t care. Not even a bit. She slid out of the truck and trudged towards his front door. She waited while he opened it then walked past him. “I need something to sleep in, please.” She looked down at the once beautiful sapphire colored dress and knew she’d never wear it again.
“No worries,” he called heading down the hall to his bedroom. He returned a moment later with an old T-shirt from his undergraduate days at USC, tossing it to her. “Here you go.”
“Thanks,” she muttered and turned towards the guest bathroom. Once inside, she ripped off the offending dress, kicked the matching heels into the corner, and pulled the old, soft cotton shirt over her head. With over a foot and seventy-five pounds on her, his shirt was more than big enough to cover the essentials. She scrubbed her face free of the makeup she hated to wear, and Carter insisted on. Wouldn’t be worrying about that anymore.
And the anger hit. Carter preferred she wore makeup and ‘decent’ clothing. Carter only took her to ‘the right’ places. Places a Bradshaw should be seen. Lunch at the club. Dinner at the finest restaurants in Charleston. Not places she wanted to go to nor things she wished to wear. She ripped open the door and stomped back into the living room.
“I’m an idiot,” she announced to a shocked Caleb. “I never saw it. All the subtle suggestions. The changes.” She shook a fist in the air and whirled on her best friend. “But not you, right? You knew what he was doing. And you let me go along with it all.” Even as the words left her mouth, she knew she was mistaken. Speaking out of blind anger. But couldn’t help herself. “You never said a thing.”
“I know you’re very upset right now, so I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.” His usually expressive face was a blank mask. “Can I get you a drink?” He turned away and headed into the kitchen.
Daisey followed him, grabbing him by the arm. “Why didn’t you stop me? Why did you stand by and let me act like such a fool?” She stopped, sobbing so hard she had to drag in air. “I thought he loved me. But he only loved some better version of me he tried to create.”
She marched past him, opening the refrigerator and grabbed the bottle of wine he kept in there for her. Blindly opening a cabinet, she grabbed the first glass she reached and poured until the red liquid reached the very rim of the glass. “And worst of all, I let him.” She sank onto the island stool and took a very large drink of the Cabernet. And then another.
She felt rather than saw him sit on the stool next to her. She heard the crack of his beer can opening. And then nothing. No words of advice or comfort. What had she done?
“I didn’t mean what I said. Well the part about you anyway. This is my fault alone.” She took another sip for courage. “You never liked him. And that should have told me something.”
“I never liked him because Carter wasn’t good enough for you. No man who asks you to change will ever be good enough for you.”
She turned, watching him drain half his beer in one gulp. Watched the muscles of his throat work. And shook off the ridiculous thought. “I wanted this to work. I’m on the wrong side of thirty, Caleb. I don’t want to end up a crazy old lady with cats. I love cats. But I don’t want to end up with fifty of them.” Somehow, her glass sat empty. So, she filled it up again.
“I’m over thirty too, you know. You don’t see me complaining about it.”
“Huh! Men have it easy. No ticking biological clocks for them.” And a fresh wave of tears soaked her. “Not that I have one.” She leaned her face into his shoulder and sobbed. “He c-c-cared more about passing along his DNA than marrying me.”
“Shush, you’re better off without him. I know it doesn’t feel that way now. But it will. One day.”
The soothing pattern he drew on her back slowed her tears. She straightened and drained a large portion of her wine. “Why can’t my life always be this easy?” She laid her head back on his shoulder, stifling a yawn with the back of her hand.
“Good question.” Caleb put down his beer and lifted her off the stool. Harley watched from the corner as he placed her on the couch and covered her with a blanket.
He started to walk away, when her hand snaked out, grabbing his arm. “Stay with me?” she muttered, half asleep, half drunk.
“Of course.”
Caleb sat on the couch, easing her head onto his lap. She sighed, her hot breath wafting against the bare skin of his knee. He shifted to find a more comfortable position. Her inky black hair fanned across him, begging his fingers to run through it. So, he did. Gentle at first to not disturb her. But wine and stress had taken their toll. He combed his fingers through the depth.
“Oh, Daisey. If you only knew. If you could only see what’s been right in front of you all these years.” A shudder ripped through him. “I know I’m to blame. I should have told you. So many things I should have told you.” He leaned down, placing the lightest of kisses on her forehead. “Starting with how much I love you. Want to spend my life with you. But, I’m a coward. All these years, I’ve been trying to find the way to tell you how I feel but afraid to risk our friendship. And then along came Carter, taking you away from me, when you weren’t mine to steal.”
Caleb froze when she shifted on the sofa. He held his breath until she found a more comfortable position, never opening her eyes. He blew it out in one long sigh. “I’m so sorry he hurt you. But I can’t say I’m sorry he’s out of your life. This time, I’m going to find the guts to tell you. This time, I’m not going to wait too long. This time, I'm not going to allow some other man to steal your heart.” He put his fingers to his lips before touching them to hers. “And I’ll never hurt you like he did.”
***
Daisey awoke with the sense of being watched. She opened her eyes to peer directly into Harley’s. The old dog sat a foot from her, one large paw on the edge of the sofa. “Who’s a good boy?” She reached out and rubbed his silky head, gaining a soft woof in response.
When her head didn’t feel as though it might splinter into pieces, she sat up, dragging Caleb’s old afghan with her. Bits and pieces of the prev
ious evening came back to her. The horrible scene in the restaurant, calling Caleb for a ride, several glasses of wine on top of the one she’d already had at dinner. Not to mention the lack of actual food at dinner. Her stomach rumbled at the thought.
“I see someone’s hungry. I wasn’t sure after last night, so I made my killer pancakes just in case. Nothing better for a hangover.” He lifted a frying pan. “And of course, there’s bacon too.”
At the word, Harley shuffled his old bones into the kitchen, sliding to a halt at his owner’s feet. “You’re a beggar,” Caleb accused without much heat before tossing him a scrap.
“I’ll be right back,” Daisey said before high tailing it to the bathroom. She frowned at the crumpled dress and heels, still in their place of shame on the floor and kicked them further into the corner. She turned her back on the discarded clothing and faced the mirror. “Lovely,” she muttered to her reflection. Her hair showed the effect of a restless night on the couch. Nothing much she could do about that. She reached into the drawer and pulled out a ponytail holder. She always kept some here for after swimming. Caleb had put a huge pool in two years ago.
Satisfied she’d done all she could, Daisey left the safety of the bathroom. She shook her head at her actions last night. What she could remember of them. The smells coming from the kitchen drew her to the small table there. She sat, tucking one foot under her and spread a napkin on her lap.
Then she gathered her courage. “So, I was an idiot last night. I am so sorry.” Best defense is a strong offense she figured. She chewed on a piece of crispy bacon while she waited for the fallout. All she got was a raised eyebrow.
“I’m sorry I yelled at you, Caleb. This had nothing to do with you. And thank you for rescuing me. Not sure I mentioned it last night.” She ducked her head at the first hint of heat in her cheeks. She’d be living this one down a long time.
But he only shrugged one well-muscled shoulder. “You don’t have anything to apologize for. Carter should be the one to do so. What kind of a man leaves a woman in a restaurant?” His tone told her how he felt about it.
“Still. You didn’t bargain for a sobbing drunk on your couch.” She picked up her knife and fork to cut her pancakes. And to keep her hands busy.
He set his down. “Let me be clear. You’re my best friend. I’m sorry Carter hurt you, but I would drive anywhere to ‘rescue’ you. As for the wine and sobbing, all part of the package of having a woman for my best friend.”
“That’s very understanding of you.” She saluted him with a piece of bacon before eating it. His familiar smile warmed her heart. “What would I ever do without you?”
“Luckily, you’ll never have to find out.”
“Yeah, right,” she snorted. “Someday, some lucky woman is going to come along and snatch you up. And I doubt she’ll be so understanding.” She picked up the coffee mug to hide the sudden sharp pain in her chest. Hopefully the day wasn’t too soon.
“I wouldn’t worry, Daisey. There’s not exactly a line of single women at the door.”
She put her mug down to study him. “And why is that? You’re a single, educated man with a great job and his own home. You don’t have any skeletons in the closet. You’re not ugly.”
“Wow. Death by faint praise.”
She balled up her napkin and threw it at him. “You know what I mean. Any woman in her right mind would be lucky to get you.”
Caleb stood and paced around the island. “Speaking of which, I need to tell you something.” He swallowed hard and shoved his hands in the pocket of his shorts.
Daisey jumped up, causing Harley to bark at her. “Before you say anything, I have an announcement. I’m done dating. No more men for me! And I’m going to need you to hold me to it.”
Chapter Three
“Oh?” So much for his plan to tell her how he felt. He sat down with a thud.
“Don’t you think it’s for the best? Besides, this gives us more time to spend together.” She threw her arms around him. “We haven’t spent as much time together this past year, thanks to he who shall not be named. And summer is coming. We should plan a vacation. Maybe go to the beach or something. Ooh, maybe the mountains. Harley would love it there.”
“Sure,” he replied. It was the best he could do when her scent floated all around him. She even thought to include his ancient dog. No wonder he’d never found a woman good enough. Not that he even bothered to look.
She tilted her head and stared at him. “Did you already have plans? I thought you’d be more excited.” Her tentative smile slid away.
“What? No. I hadn’t planned anything with you, because, well you know.”
“Because you hated my boyfriend. See, there is a bright side. Now, we can go back to the way it always has been.”
“Sure.” He watched her take a big bite of her breakfast, watched in fascination as a drab of syrup oozed from the corner of her lush mouth. He gripped his hands in his lap to prevent himself from reaching out to catch it. Of course, he’d rather use his tongue.
“So, which is it? Beach or mountains?”
“Mountains,” he answered, since he couldn’t handle her in a bikini for days on end. “When can you get time off?”
“I already asked for the last week of June. I thought, uh…” He watched her lower her gaze to her plate.
“You thought Carter would take you somewhere,” he finished for her.
“We had talked about going away.” She stopped, cleared her throat and did the thing with her eyes women always did when they didn’t want to cry. “I don’t blame him. Not really.”
Caleb sat very still, chose his words with care. “And why not? I do.”
She set down her fork. “Family is important to him. He wants children. I can’t give them to him.”
His heart twisted at the pain in her voice. She whispered the last part. He grabbed her hand. “You guys could still have had a family. But he cares more about the Bradshaw name then he does about you.” He raised his other hand and wiped away one, errant tear. “You deserve better. You deserve someone who loves you enough to not care about it.” Someone like me. But he didn’t say the words aloud. She wasn’t ready to hear them. Might never be.
She squeezed his hand back. “And that’s why I love you. You always have my back.” She sniffed back more tears. “But now I have something to look forward to. A vacation with my best friend! I can’t wait to start planning. Just going to warn you. There may be a fair amount of adult beverages involved.”
“Sounds like a plan.” Much better than being firmly lumped into the friend category. But he had only himself to blame.
***
Two weeks later, Daisey picked at her salad as she perused rental properties in the Blue Ridge Mountains. Bringing Harley, not to mention almost no lead time, cut the availability to almost nothing. But she spied a two-bedroom, pet friendly cabin just north of Asheville, North Carolina that looked perfect. She dashed off a message to the owner and crossed her fingers for luck.
She picked up her phone and sent a quick text to Caleb. “May have found something. Think positive thoughts!”
A moment later, he responded with a thumb’s up emoji. Typical of her software engineer best friend.
She scarfed down the rest of her lunch and finished her water. She had several back to back spays this afternoon, clients from the local shelter. Daisey believed in paying it forward. The members of her community supported her animal clinic rather than go to a bigger one in the city. She liked to help out where she could.
“Dr. Sherman, they’re ready for you in OR 1,” came a voice over the PA system. She couldn’t stop the chuckle escaping her. They only had one OR. There was her cue. She tossed the remains of her lunch and hurried out of her office.
Candace, her vet tech, smiled from the sink where she scrubbed her hands. “Ready, Dr. Sherman? We have a few to do.”
“Candace, how many times have I asked you to call me Daisey?” She stepped up next to her and bega
n to scrub up as well.
The older woman smiled at her. She had three children she was raising on her own, two of whom attended college. Her youngest, Daniel, would start high school in the fall. “And how many times have I reminded you, Dr. Sherman, you are my boss? And therefore, I will be calling you Dr. Sherman from now until the cows come home.”
Daisey grinned back. “One day, I’ll wear you down.” She glanced through the window into the small OR. A young female Beagle lay on the table, already under anesthesia from the looks of things. “I think they’re ready for us.”
Candace followed her glance. “Looks like it.”
The next few hours flew as she completed four surgeries. All had been routine and straight forward, thankfully, and all of her patients rested in their cages. She rubbed her lower back and plopped into her office chair, twisting this way and that to loosen the sore muscles. She opened her laptop, delighted at a return message from then owner of the cabin. It was theirs for the taking, and Harley was more than welcome. Excellent!!! She completed the online form, paying for the week with her Disney rewards card. She may not have kids, but she still loved Disneyworld.
“Pack your bags. The cabin is ours!! I’ll email you the link.” She sent the text to Caleb and then emailed him the information as promised. Grinning, she sat back in her chair. Things may not have gone the way she wanted with Carter, but she and Caleb (and Harley) would spend a lovely week in the mountains she loved. She’d take it.
***
Across town, Caleb read the text, locked in his office. Pam, his very efficient but determined, secretary sat outside at her desk, plotting the end of his bachelor days. He loved Pam, really, but she didn’t understand that none of her endless daughters or nieces were Daisey. Of course, she didn’t know about his unrequited love for Daisey. Just after lunch, she once again dropped some not so subtle hints. Lindsay, her accountant niece, was the latest in a long line of potential dates. He always said no. She always patted his hand and walked away. Until the next time.