Annie had seen the queen several times at the stables, but she hadn’t seen her socially since Christmas at Sandringham. Lord Hatton and the trainers kept her running at work. She was familiar with the horse they’d have in the race and had exercised him several times. He was young and considered a long shot in the race, but the queen had a great deal of faith in him, and the jockey who would be riding him. He had won some impressive victories for them before.
Annie told Anthony about the race as soon as she accepted, and he said he’d arrange with his father to be there, and no one would find it unusual. They both wanted to remain discreet for now, or the queen and cabinet might start to interfere, and then the press and public opinion. Neither of them wanted to face that yet.
She invited her father and he was delighted. When the day of the race came, the queen and Lord Hatton invited her to the paddock before the race. The horse seemed tense, as though he sensed what was coming, and the jockey was calm. He was the same size as Annie, but powerfully built, with strong shoulders and arms, and a rider’s legs. If they won, the odds were twenty to one.
When she went back to the royal box, Anthony had arrived. Victoria was there in a glamorous outfit with a dashing looking new man. She kissed Annie’s cheek and was happy to see her. They kept promising to lunch with each other, but they hadn’t yet. They all watched intensely as the horse took off, slowly and steadily at first and then stronger and stronger, as none of them dared to breathe or speak. Then with a powerful surge, driven forward by the jockey, their horse shot ahead gathering incredible speed, and finished four lengths ahead of the horse behind him. Everyone in the royal box gave a scream. Victoria and Annie were jumping up and down. The queen hugged Lord Hatton, Jonathan pumped his hand to congratulate him, and Anthony grabbed Annie and held her and they smiled at each other. The horse had won, at twenty-to-one odds. They all went to congratulate the jockey, who was covered in mud and wreathed in smiles. The queen hugged him and had mud on her face afterward and they all laughed. Her sons had come down from school for it, and there was jubilation in the royal box. The purse was a good one, and they had all bet on him.
Annie’s eyes were alight afterward and Lord Hatton laughed at her. “You can taste it, can’t you?” He could see how badly she wanted to be a jockey and win a race. “One day. It will happen,” he assured her.
“I’ll be an old woman by then,” she said, looking discouraged.
“You’re still a baby, you have time,” Anthony’s father said. She saw Anthony look unhappy and he said something afterward, when he gave her a ride to the restaurant. The queen had invited them all to dinner to celebrate.
“You still want to race as badly as that?” Anthony asked her, worried. He had heard the exchange with her father and saw the look on her face.
“Yes, if I could. But I don’t think they’ll ever let women race here in my lifetime.”
“And if they do?”
“I’d like to try it,” she said softly. It wasn’t worth arguing about, since it wasn’t a possibility.
“What if we’re married and have children by then?” he asked pointedly.
“I suppose it would be too late then. Please don’t worry about it. It’s not happening.”
“But it could, and you could break your neck out there.” He looked anxious and upset. He was willing to think about settling down now. She wasn’t. Racing was in her blood. She wanted that more than any man. He could see it in her eyes every time the subject came up.
“Thompson didn’t break his neck today,” she said quietly.
“He’s been doing it for years, and one day he might. I don’t want my wife and the mother of my children dead on a racetrack,” he said, looking angry. But more than angry, he was afraid for her.
“It’s been my dream all my life,” she said quietly. “If I had the chance I’d do it.” She was always honest with him. “But I don’t have the chance.”
“I hope it stays that way.” He didn’t speak again until they got to the restaurant and then he relaxed, and she noticed the queen watching them once or twice, and wondered if she suspected anything. But she had no reason to object. She’d known Anthony all his life, and there was nothing she could object to. His father was a lord, he was well educated, well brought up, and a gentleman. She might object to their having an affair, but they were both single, and it was 1967, not 1910. And thanks to Anthony and his friend in New York, she was on the pill, so she wasn’t going to get pregnant and cause a scandal with a child out of wedlock. And they intended to get married. Someday. Although neither of them was in a rush. They had everything they wanted now. The queen didn’t ask any questions, or comment, nor did Victoria, who was there that night too.
In May, on Annie’s birthday, Anthony took her to dinner at Harry’s Bar, and dancing at Annabel’s afterward, since he was a member of both clubs. They ran into Victoria, who arrived at Annabel’s shortly after they did, with a married American she’d been dating less than discreetly, which the queen wasn’t pleased about. Victoria took one look at them, and could see what had happened. She sent over a bottle of champagne after wishing Annie a happy birthday, and in return, they toasted her and her handsome friend. He was a well-known actor, married to a movie star, and wanted to divorce his wife for Victoria. It had been all over the tabloids.
By coincidence, they left the club at the same time, and the paparazzi were waiting for Victoria and her movie star. They got photographs of Annie and Anthony too, and recognized both of them. It was a bonus for the paparazzi, and the tabloids were full of both couples the next day, with the headline over Annie and Anthony’s photograph, ROYAL WEDDING BELLS? GOOD JOB, ANTHONY!
The queen called Annie that morning from Buckingham Palace and discreetly asked if the rumor was true. Were she and Anthony planning to get married?
“We’re seeing each other,” Annie admitted with nothing to hide, “but we have no plans to marry at the moment. It still seems too soon, to both of us.” It was the truth.
“I have no objection, as long as he’s sown the last of his wild oats. He was a bit of a playboy for a few years, I believe. But he’s the right age to settle down, if he has.” He had just turned thirty-one, and she was twenty-three now. “He’s a lovely young man. I’ve known his family all my life. Just don’t wait too long, if that’s what you want to do. You don’t want to become fodder for the tabloids, and have the paparazzi following you around all the time. Once you’re married, they’ll lose interest.” Annie didn’t want to marry just to get rid of the paparazzi, but the queen had made herself clear. She had conservative values and she preferred marriage to dating. “You’re old enough now, dear.” But Annie didn’t feel old enough at twenty-three, and she was still getting used to the royal life. It was her first taste of what Anthony disliked so much, pressure from the Crown.
She reported the conversation to Anthony when he called her, and he was annoyed.
“That was my point earlier. I don’t want the House of Windsor telling us what to do. We should get married when we want to. We’re just getting started. What’s the hurry?”
“I’d rather wait awhile too. Twenty-three seems so young to get married. I kind of thought twenty-five or -six,” Annie said thoughtfully.
“Thirty-one seems young to me too. I used to think thirty-five was the right age for a man. We’ll know when it’s right. But it should be up to us. She’s going to put the heat on now. And can you imagine what she must have said to Victoria today? She must be having a fit over that.” She was, and had told her sister to break it off immediately before she disgraced herself again. Victoria was used to it by now. She’d been battling with her family over who she dated for twenty years, and seemed to take pleasure in shocking them, the public, and the press. Annie and Anthony didn’t want to be part of that.
Lord Hatton called Anthony for confirmation too, and said he was delighted about
Annie. He couldn’t have made a better choice, and when were they getting married. He hoped it would be soon. Like the queen, he thought they should get out of the public eye and the press quickly, and marriage was the fastest way to do that. It seemed like the wrong reason to marry, to both of them.
Jonathan called to tell her he was thrilled, he liked Anthony immensely, and to do whatever she wanted. But the palace and even Anthony’s father were pushing for a fast marriage, which felt rushed to them. They refused to be pushed, much to the queen’s chagrin, but she had bigger problems with her sister.
* * *
—
Annie went to Saint Tropez with Anthony that summer for her holiday, and they were beleaguered by the paparazzi and followed everywhere and had to take refuge on a friend’s yacht, and sailed for Sardinia, where it happened all over again. It was endless. Whenever they went out, in London or any other city, even if they went to the grocery store, they wound up all over the tabloids, kissing, not kissing, holding hands, having an argument in the park once. Anthony was seriously annoyed about it.
“I don’t want them rushing us into marriage. And even if we get married, they’ll follow us around now. If we have a baby, have kids, get pregnant, go skiing. Whatever we do, they’re going to pursue us. I hate this.” He looked furious, and she didn’t like it either. “Do you want to get married now?” he asked her bluntly. “I’ll do whatever you want.” But it took the fun out of it, getting married because they were being pressured into it, by the queen or the tabloids.
“Not really,” she said honestly. “Why don’t we just call a moratorium on it, and make the decision in two years when I turn twenty-five. I’ll be ready then. You’ll be thirty-three. And screw what the tabloids think, or anyone else.”
“Sounds perfect to me,” he agreed. “Two years, and then we’ll jump in. Done.” He kissed her to seal the deal. It seemed like an unromantic decision, but the right one for them.
The press continued to follow them around after that. But not as avidly. They got bored with it without an engagement or a wedding date. And the queen continued to drop hints whenever she saw them, but she was much more upset about her sister, who seemed to enjoy creating scandals. She always had.
Annie and Anthony were happy as they were. She stayed with him when she was in London, and he stayed in her room at the stables now, since everyone knew about them anyway. His father lent him his house frequently. So everything calmed down, and their relationship continued. In their minds, they figured they’d get married, or at least engaged, in two years when Annie turned twenty-five. It seemed the right age to both of them. And to satisfy her longing to race, Anthony’s father convinced her to enter the Newmarket Town Plate that fall. It was the only women’s race under jockey club rules. She placed second and was jubilant. But it only made her hunger to race against men more acute. She entered again the following year and placed first. Shortly before her twenty-fifth birthday, before they could revisit their marriage plans, Annie got a call from a famous trainer in Lexington, Kentucky. He invited her to race for the stable he worked for, in the Blue Grass Stakes Thoroughbred race at Keeneland racecourse in Lexington. She would be competing against male jockeys for a million-dollar purse. It was a pari-mutuel race, the opportunity she’d longed for all her life. They had heard of her, and seen her race at the Newmarket Town Plate. She would be the first female jockey registered for the race in Kentucky, and her heart was pounding when she hung up after the call. She was so excited she could taste it. She had waited for this moment for years, and she knew she was ready. She had accepted on the phone, and now she had to tell Anthony. She hoped he’d be reasonable about it. She knew Lord Hatton would be excited for her, and Jonathan would too.
She waited until Anthony came up for the weekend, and didn’t say anything to him about it before that. They were paying her a fortune to do it. But she wasn’t doing it for the money, although that was nice too. She was doing it because it was her dream, and she knew she had to do it. And she expected Anthony to know that too.
There was no avoiding the subject. He could tell that she was hiding something, and she didn’t want to conceal it from him. She told him about the call an hour after he got there.
“You turned them down, I hope?” he said, looking tense, his eyes never leaving hers.
“I couldn’t. I’ve waited all my life for this, and you know it. I have to do it.”
“And risk your life as a jockey? Competing against men?” He looked horrified.
“I’m not going to die, Anthony. This is my dream,” she said quietly.
“I thought we were your dream, you and I. If I ask you not to do it, will you turn it down?” He was turning it into a proving ground, and a test, which wasn’t fair. She didn’t answer for a moment, and then shook her head. It was a crucial moment in their relationship, and she knew it. But she couldn’t give up the race for him.
“I can’t. Don’t ask me to do that. It’s not right. I’ve wanted to be a jockey as long as I’ve been riding.”
“What about us?”
“Why can’t we do both? I’m not going to race forever. But give me a year. There’s talk that they’ll allow women to race in the Kentucky Derby next year. It would be the high point of my life.”
“I don’t want to be married to a jockey. What do you want, Annie? Me? Us? Or to be a jockey? You can’t have both.” His eyes were like steel as he looked at her. He had dug his heels in. He had never said it as clearly before. She was twenty-five and didn’t want to give up her dreams or lose them.
“Why not? Why do I have to give up my dreams to marry you?”
“Because I don’t want to be married to a woman who could die any day of the week, or break her neck and be paralyzed, just because she wants the thrill of winning and can’t give it up. It’s not compatible with marriage and having babies, and you know it.”
“So we wait a year. Let me race for a year, and then I’ll quit. I promise.” After the Kentucky Derby if the runors were true and she could compete in it in a year.
“I don’t believe you. You won’t quit. It’s in your blood. You have a decision to make,” he said in a voice that was pure ice. “If you go to Kentucky and ride in this race, it’s over with us. I’m finished. If you want to be married to me, turn the race down. Once you start riding as a jockey in legitimate races against men, you’ll never give it up. I know you.” She knew he was right, and she was willing to make the sacrifice for him, but not just yet. She wanted to live her dreams first. This was her chance. He gave her a hard look that left no room for argument. “Let me know what you decide,” he said, and slammed out of his father’s house, where they’d been discussing it. His father was in his office and had left them the house. She heard Anthony’s car drive away.
She was heartbroken over his decision, but she thought he was being unreasonable, and there was no way she was going to give up this race for him. It was a huge deal and the beginning of a whole new chapter of her life. She had waited all her life to be a jockey, legally, in the big leagues, not some second-rate amateur race. She had waited two and a half years to get engaged and become his wife. There was no choice in her mind. She was going to the States, and if he couldn’t live with it, then he wasn’t the right man for her. She was not going to give up her dreams for him. And if he loved her, he wouldn’t ask her to.
She didn’t call Anthony and he didn’t call her. Three weeks later, she was on the plane to Kentucky. Her dreams with Anthony were over. Her dreams of being a jockey just meant too much to her to give up, even for him, and she truly loved him. She expected him to understand how much the race meant to her. He did, which was why he had left her and hadn’t called. The race meant more to her than he did.
Chapter 17
The race in Kentucky in June was the most exciting event of her life. It lived up to all her expectations. The horse she was hired to ride
was spectacular. She had heard about the breeder for years but never met him. Lord Hatton knew him, and had guessed that they would give her a fabulous horse to ride and he’d been right. The queen had called to wish her luck. Victoria had sent a telegram, and Jonathan had called and told her she could do it, to focus and think of nothing else.
Anthony was heavy on her mind, and her heart, but she couldn’t allow herself that now. She couldn’t think of anything except the race. She would talk to him afterward, and try to make peace with him. But for now there was only the track she’d be running, the race, and the horse she’d be riding. Nothing else in the world mattered. She spoke to no one in the last week except the breeder, the trainer, and the owner. And she trained on the horse all week, getting to know him.
She slept two hours the night before the race, and woke up at four in the morning. She took a long hot shower and went for a run to try to relax, and was in the horse’s stall and had a long conversation with him. She knew he could carry her to victory. The odds were thirty to one against her. No one thought a woman could do it in a race like this. It was a historic moment. There was one other woman registered to ride. She was riding a horse that had won numerous races in the States. He was a sure thing, and an easier ride than the horse Annie would be riding. Hers was named Ginger Boy, and no one was sure what he could do. Except Annie, who believed in him, and knew he could win.
She stood quietly stroking him, and talking to him. “We can do it, you know. I know I can, and so can you. Don’t let them spook you, Boy. Just take it nice and easy at first.” They weighed her, and she put on the colors of the owner she was riding for. Her helmet was secure, and the owner and trainer watched her as she mounted Ginger Boy. Her small white face was serious and her blue eyes looked huge.
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