by Greg Dragon
She moved into his arms and put her body close to his. “What if I don’t want to?”
It took everything within him not to surrender to her. They embraced for a time until Rafian thought about what would happen if Marian came into the party and saw him hugging another woman through the glass. He gently moved away from Camille by holding her upper arms while stepping backwards. He bowed his head as if defeated.
She felt the dismissal and a wave of embarrassment washed over her. “Okay, Raf, I won’t tempt you as you seem to have a lot going on inside of your head. But you must realize that I am tormented, too in my own way. You saved me from the jaws of death and I can’t stop worrying about you.”
“Just get my back in the field like you always have, Cam. We look out for one another, – you know this. None of that warrants gifts, repayment, or life debts. Do you think I would ever consider letting you stay on a psych ship forever? We are nothing without you, Camille YAN, and I don’t want our complicated love interfering with the reality of that.”
“That means a lot, Rafian. It really does. Part of my happiness with being cloned comes with the knowledge that I no longer inhabit a body defiled by the machinations of the Jumper organization. We all gave up our very souls for this knowledge and skillset that we now hold, so even a little appreciation of that feels good to hear.”
“Can you forgive me, Cammy?” he asked. Tayden’s words were still fresh in his mind and he felt guilty. Camille was to have been the love of his life but Marian VCA had filled the role.
“You’re forgiven, Rafian. I can’t stay upset with you.”
With that, the two lovers embraced again and Camille rested her head gently against his chest as she fought back the emotions welling up inside. They belonged together and she knew that he knew it, but they could not—his honor would not allow it. The situation made her want to cry and she almost wished that she had died on the Psyche ship.
“Well, I can only stand awkward for so long, Raf, so I will take my leave now if you don’t mind.”
“Where are you off to?”
“I’m going home,” she said. “This was a wonderful party and I appreciate our talk, but I’m not feeling welI. I will talk to you later.”
He wanted to run over to her and make her his once again, but despite his feelings he stood frozen. “Goodbye, Cammy.”
She walked through the translucent glass and into the party as Rafian turned to look once more on the beach where Val and Marika were now missing. He felt guilty, but as he stood watching the waves as they crashed against the base of the tower, he began to feel better. As the minutes passed, a number of recruits, soldiers and friends who saw him brooding outside went to him to offer up drinks, conversation, or general inquiries.
He was about to re-enter the building when Marian stepped through the glass wearing a thin silver dress. Her hair was a waterfall of curls that bounced as she walked, giving her a rather remarkable appearance. She looked at him as if he were someone she hadn’t seen in days. She flashed him a wicked grin when his look of surprise caught her. When he made to hug her, she stopped him short and then looked behind her to make sure they were alone.
“Hey, Rhee, it isn’t…”
“You know what, Rafian,” she said. Her every instinct wanted to shove him off the edge into the waters of the sea below. But she resisted the urge and fought back her temper. He could see her struggle manifest itself across her features and made to approach her before she stopped him short.
“I’ve been thinking for a long time now, ever since you’ve been back from the Soreble fight. And I haven’t seen you in days,” she said. “Now initially, I thought you and Camille might be playing an intense game of catch-up that meant long nights of passion, but when I followed you – yes, I’ve followed you – I saw that you spent most of your time alone. You just stay away from everyone, even me, which for all sense and purposes is just sad. So I came out here to tell you that you can have what you’ve always wanted. You can have your freedom.”
Rafian looked at Marian with interest, wondering what she meant by “what you’ve always wanted.” She walked up to him and placed the ring into his shirt pocket, then returned to her original position without saying a word.
“I never asked for this, Marian. I never—“
“You never asked to love two women,” she cut in. “I know, and I know that for all of your many wonderful strengths and gifts, your weakness in this is just too much for me to handle. When we were on the ship and you told me how you would sleep with all the girls you wanted and expected me to accept it as a good Phaser soldier, I began to hate you.” He opened his mouth but she held up a hand. “Wait, let me finish, please. I know that you more than anyone else understand hate. You have to realize that it poisoned my very soul and turned me back into the person I was before you met me. I can never be Rienne Laren again, Rafian—now that you have taken me away from all that I know—but I refuse to sit in your world as anything less than number one where love is concerned. I have stuck it out; I have looked very much like a fool, and now I must return. Tyhera needs me and it is time for us to part.”
Rafian stood frozen as his beautiful wife continued her exit speech. He didn’t even realize that a cadet in the local military branch had come outside to get his autograph but was now witnessing the most devastating episode in his entire life.
“But Tyherans don’t divorce, Rhee—“
“Well, we are neither on Tyhera or Luca now are we, Raf? Look, Tayden gave me clearance to jump back and check on my family and I wanted to take you with me – funny enough, that is why I came here tonight. However, seeing Camille against you like that brought me back to the reality of our situation and I’m sorry Raf… I’m just done with all of this.”
“Marian, please. Don’t do this,” Rafian said quietly as he stared at the ground, feeling powerless to save his marriage at that very moment.
He expected the dark woman to lash out and deny him any chances of changing her mind but Marian’s eyes produced tears and they were not tears of anger.
“I can’t lose you,” Rafian said as he stared at her, but Marian held her ground and looked back at him as if expecting something more. “I’d like to fix this if you’d let me, Rhee.”
The two soldiers stood looking at one another. The silence seemed endless as they inhaled air into heavy chests and wished away the painful knots lodged in their throats. After what seemed like an hour of brooding, Rafian spoke again, but this time he spoke as he walked over to her and placed the ring back on her finger.
Surprisingly, she allowed him to do so, then reached up and touched his cheek before kissing him gently on the lips.
“Rafian, I am still leaving you, but only for a time. While I am gone and taking care of my people, I want you to think hard on why it is you brought me here in the first place.”
“How long will you be gone, Marian? I should come with you. I still have the temple in Veece and—“
“You’ve made it more than clear that everything you truly love is here in the galaxy of Anstractor, Raf. The crusade I am about to embark on is one of love and care for the people of Luca and eliminating the Felitian tyranny. You were one of us when you made your first jump and lost your memory, but the man you were then—the man I loved beyond the stars—is not the man that would return with me. Take the time, my love. Take the time away from me to heal and come back to yourself.”
With that, Marian spun dramatically to make her exit, the loose silver cloth of her dress trailing her long strides as she touched the glass and disappeared into the building.
As he stood looking at the space where Marian once stood, he suddenly felt an emptiness he had not felt in a long time. It was an empty fear that he would never see her again, or get to hold her slender body within his arms. He rushed the door and broke into the party looking for her but knew that she would be long gone. He walked out to the front of the building, mounted his hover-bike without
a word, and sped off towards his cavern home, hoping he could catch her before she jumped. He knew that he wouldn’t. Marian would have already jumped by the time he made it home to beg her forgiveness, so he stopped the bike on a hill overlooking the city and took a deep breath.
“I will fix this,” he said to himself and then changed his destination for the Phaser hanger.
Memory 6
When Rafian stepped out onto the deck of the Helysian, he felt as if he had not been back in ages. There was no reason for that feeling, as everything was exactly the way he remembered it. There were numerous fighters lined up, ready to deploy at the drop of a command, and there were a number of dockhands tending to them and other broken down versions that had seen the worst side of a battle. He checked his own phantom and found that it looked sleeker than any other ship there. This was thanks in part to Camille, who still made it her routine to shine the exterior of his ship. An athletic and spry pilot came bounding up to him as soon as he had gathered his thoughts and stood beaming at him as he looked around.
“Hello?” Rafian said, unsure of what to make of the man and his strange behavior.
The pilot caught himself, touched his chest quickly and bowed in a salute. “I am so sorry, Commander VCA, but I, well, uhm. Sir! I am Sako Trynessis and I am a big fan of yours. I have studied your files for years and fashioned my fighting after you and…well, it is an honor to meet the real Rafian VCA in the flesh, sir. I know this is where you grew up but I didn’t guess that you would be back.”
“Pleasure to meet you, Sako. Quite an accent you got there. Where are you from originally? Were you one of the pilots that helped out in the defense of the Messio-Tral?”
“Yes, sir. I downed five of the Gerries but was forced to jump out of there when a trace laser caught three fighters in my fleet. I learned that your Phasers were the ones who eventually beat that beast of a destroyer. Phasers are in a class of their own so I am not surprised.”
“Met many Phasers?”
“No, sir, but there was a lengthy expose on them on one of the vids in the Imperial archives. I am from Traxis originally. Is there anything I can do to help you, Commander?”
“Yes, actually. I am looking for a woman named Aurora SYN – she is my sister. I think she is still doing the navigation for this vessel, but it has been many months since we last spoke. She’s a beautiful woman.” Rafian was met with a blank stare and he added, “Cocoa brown complexion, large eyes, big smile and a bubbly personality.”
“Sorry, Commander, I don’t know an Aurora and the description you gave matches too many women on this ship for me to direct you. If you will permit me, I can walk you to our commander’s office. He would be happy to know that a true son of Helysian is onboard and would be able to track down your sister for you.”
Rafian nodded and Sako took him past the ships to the exit of the dock. The next room opened up into a large hub where numerous soldiers and civilians were going about their daily lives talking, eating and enjoying life. Rafian remembered how much he disliked this area, as it was the main hub for the more popular kids on the Helysian. He had grown up an outcast, until the day he’d taken the military test to become a First Grade Cadet. All of a sudden, the popular crowd was yearning to know him. His thoughts returned to Kimber, his first girlfriend and the one person who had given him a chance when everyone else was trying to use him. He hadn’t been an angry child, but he was incredibly focused. He only wanted to be a pilot and nothing more. He wondered at Sako’s goals—were they lofty, or did he only wish to fly the way his hero flew? It felt odd, walking and talking with someone who modeled their military career after him, when he had done the same with Helga “Hellgate” ATE. If she were to appear to him now that he was the all-important Rafian VCA, would he rush to accompany her and talk to her like Sako was doing now? No, he wouldn’t. He would want to take her to dinner, buy a bottle of her favorite liquor, and toast the military life. While the uniforms, protocol and empty rules were a distant memory to him now, he recognized that it was the military that had given him the foundation to be who he was now. Without the Marine Corps, there would be no Rafian VCA, Supreme Leader.
Sako took him through the multi-leveled floors of activity to the bottom where they crossed the carpeted floor to a hallway that held numerous doors. The people that passed by them would gush as they recognized Rafian, who wore the thick cloak of a Phaser over his 3B suit and had his las-word swinging loosely at his hip. Some tried to stop and talk to him, but Sako shooed them away quickly and picked up the pace so that Rafian could get through without obstruction.
“We ought to have a VIP hallway for you, sir,” he said after he stepped in front of a crowd of cadets that had caught wind of Rafian’s arrival. They’d rushed to the square to see if they could score autographs, vids, or photographs with him. Rafian let Sako lead him away, but felt obligated to stop when a nervous boy ran up to him and hugged his leg. The child couldn’t have been any older than eight years old and Rafian knelt and returned the hug before inviting the rest over to hang out with him for a time. Sako was annoyed but smiled it off as an effect of someone like Rafian VCA coming aboard. The children showered Rafian with questions and he answered them all. He took his time signing their helmets, vilo-swords and whatever else they brought up to him. This went on for the better part of an hour when a beautiful woman with her hair tied back in plaits walked through the crowd to stand where he could see her.
“Okay, cadets, I think the Commander is tired from his trip and would like to find his room. Don’t you agree?”
There was a chorus of “yes, ma’ams” and “alrights” from the crowd as they broke away from Rafian and he stood up to see who had broken up the party. His face lit up when he recognized Aurora.
“AURY!” He hugged her tightly before turning to introduce her to Sako, but he had vanished.
“RAF! Why are you here? You didn’t call ahead to tell anyone you were coming and you came alone. Like, where is Marian?”
“Rhee is back home training some of our Phasers, sis,” he lied. “She wanted to come but I told her that this was a solo mission.”
“Mission?” Her face clouded with concern. “Is there something going on here, Rafian? What mission?”
“The mission to bring you to Vestalia. There is a new city, a large military, and a chance for growth there that you will never see here on this ship. I wish that I were asking, Aury, but it’s more of an order. After what happened to the Missio-tral, I just can’t chance that happening to you. The Geralos are growing agitated with us and will be moving to bring an all-out assault on our space presence to try and wipe us all out. I am afraid that my Phasers have made them very afraid of humans and though I cannot go into detail, I know they are taking the fight into space.”
“Rafian, I have a family now. You have a nephew you haven’t met, and I have a husband. We have a really cozy home and I cannot uproot them,” Aurora said. “You yourself lived on this ship when the Geralos were in full swing and not once was Helysian attacked. The Commander keeps us hidden; you know that he values his civilian passengers as much as he does his soldiers. He would never put us in danger and you should trust him. Look, I appreciate the gesture but I cannot go with you. Helysian is my home—it is your home, too!”
Aurora took Rafian’s hand and led him away from the square. The pair stepped into a hover-car and sped away towards the military housing area. The car was fast, drifting above the heads of the various citizens until it was out in the main area of the ship, which was big enough for them to fly freely. Aurora slowed the car down to a crawl, then reached over and kissed Rafian again on the cheek as she threw her hands up as if to cheer.
“Stop ruining the moment, brother! No more talk of taking me away. I want you to accept your home and those of us who still live here.”
“Yeah, I know Aurora, but what we have on Vestalia is not what you think it is. We are very well hidden from the Geralos and we have the defenses t
o take out anything that would threaten us there. You and your family would be safe, and you would be able to do so much more than you can here.”
Aurora drove silently after he said this and seemed to be in deep thought as Rafian reminisced mentally on the days when he would fly around the ship to his various classes and to his apartment when he lived with his volatile girlfriend, Vani. He had already made up his mind that he would leave with Aurora. She did not know it yet, but he wanted her off the ship because they were on the eve of a massive war that would see the Helysian in action. Having not been in a battle for over fifty years, the people on board would not be ready for it. If Aurora wouldn’t come with him, he would have to blink her out using the crystals, and he didn’t want to do this due to the amount of questions that would arise.
“So, what’s your son’s name?”
“You’re going to laugh, but I am a bit of a sentimental girl, y’know. His name is Ian.”
Rafian smiled, as he knew that it would either be his name or something relative to him, due to their past. Ian was the second part of his name – Raf-Ian – and he recognized it immediately. Aurora was not his biological sister, but he had rescued her when her ship had gone haywire and she’d floated out into deep space with no hope of survival. When he had brought her back, he had made her his sister. The two of them were very similar in terms of them being outcasts, and Rafian had yearned for the companionship of someone who was not a girlfriend.
“That’s one hell of a name.”
“I believe it is.”
“Does the boy know the weight that comes with a name like that? The curse of being a thorn in every woman’s side that he comes in contact with and the eyes of death around every corner?”