by Lila Felix
“Why?” She repeated it again. Did I have to spell it out for her?
I took a deep breath and the bell rang. She didn’t move a muscle.
“I don’t want you to be late. We will talk at lunch, ok?”
She looked disappointed, but I didn’t want her to be late.
“Ok”, she said and she walked away.
I overheard some kids talking about a place called Tunica Hills. From what I could hear it was some kind of place with waterfalls and hiking. I waited until third period and then asked Troy. He said it was in Mississippi, but not far from here. He knew how to get there and we made plans to take Remi and Josie, if Remi was still speaking to me.
I walked to the cafeteria and Remi grabbed my hand out of nowhere and dragged me outside to what I now thought of as our tree. We sat and she said “Spill it.”
She was unpacking all kinds of things from her backpack as I started. It was a simple explanation really. So it didn’t take long.
“Remi, I…I just want to help you.”
“Why?”
“Because I care about you and I want to make this easier on you.”
“Why?”
I must be caught in an episode of Sesame Street and the letter of the day is ‘Y’.
“Can’t I just help you and care about you without some kind of motive?”
“Not where I come from.”
This had progressed beyond aggravation.
“Fine. I’m sorry I tried to help you. I’m sorry I tried to date you or whatever. My mistake. Won’t happen again. I just don’t get it. One minute you’re inviting me to breakfast and we’re fine and the next minute you’re acting like I’m trying to…I don’t know what you’re thinking. I’m trying here.”
I got up and walked towards the building and up to the library that I had passed. I went all the way to the windows. I couldn’t help myself. I looked out the window and down at her. I expected her to be eating and happy to be rid of me, but what I saw cracked my chest in two and left me feeling like a douche bag.
She was crying and not eating and Josie was sitting next to her rubbing her back. She was having to console her because I was the jerk who made her cry. Back to square one, or negative eight hundred.
I felt like crap the rest of the day and drove home with a silent Troy in tow. I dropped him off and he turned and spoke into the open window.
“What are you gonna do?” He asked.
“I don’t know, but I need to do something.”
“Ain’t that the truth. Let her breathe a little bit and get to where she misses you.”
“What if she never gets there?”
He chuckled at me as he re-shouldered his backpack.
“From what Josie says, she thinks it’s her fault. She ran you off. She’s pissed at herself. She’ll get there.”
“Thanks man.” We bumped fists and he went into his house.
I decided to go to the one person that I felt completely comfortable talking to.
Gram, as she wanted me to call her now, was quiet today. She listened to me moan and groan about Remi, but she didn’t crack jokes or say anything until I was done. She stayed silent for so long that I looked at her closer to see if she had fallen asleep.
“Get that stool Cooper and pull it up right in front of me.” She pointed to a small squatty stool and I obeyed.
When I sat in front of her she pinched the front of my KISS t shirt and rolled her eyes.
“Let me tell you about girls like Remi. They are precious as rubies, but rubies are expensive. You have to work hard to earn a ruby. But once you do, once you’ve shown her that you recognize her as the gem that she is, she’ll never forget it. And more importantly, she’ll see that she’s a ruby. But you’ve got to do most of the work. But the reward is her love. You understand me Cooper honey?”
“I’ve tried Gram. She threw it in my face and acted like I had some kind of ulterior motive.”
She chuckled her little grandma chuckle and squeezed my cheeks.
“Oh my boy, it’s gonna take more than a couple of days to show her. But the last thing you ever want to do is walk away from her. When you do, she buries her heart deeper and next time it’s harder to find. You know, your grandfather and I were married forty two years. Know why?”
“Why?” I was absolutely entranced by her sage wisdom.
“Because he never ever walked away. I knew that no matter what I did, he was going to be there waiting and loving me. He made me see that I was worth the effort.”
“Ok, I can do that.”
“Are you sure? You’re so young to be so committed to one girl.”
“How old were you and grandpa when you first started dating or whatever.”
She giggled again. “Well, we were fourteen. But that was a very different time.”
I hugged her goodbye and went home. Eric and I ate dinner together and then we watched some kind of show where people get caught acting stupid on video. It was pretty funny and I was kinda starting to like Eric. He said my mom had called and not to worry about calling her tonight because she was working the late shift. I made my way up to my apartment and texted Troy. He said that Josie and Remi were at Remi’s house studying together. That’s fine. I would wait her out. But it was still my turn to bring food tomorrow. I wasn’t going back on our deal no matter what.
The next morning I got dressed and went to get Troy. He shook his head at my bag of breakfast and hot chocolate in a to-go cup for Remi and said I might be barking up the wrong tree. I glared him down and he relented by saying that I was doing the right thing.
The girls pulled into the parking lot shortly after us and tried to walk towards the school but away from us. So I walked directly to the front door and blocked their entrance. I smiled at Remi and said “Good morning, today’s my turn.” I handed her the bag and the cup and walked away before she could protest.
I put my stuff in my locker and went to class. Yes, this was going to work.
By the time I got to third period I was back to worrying. But thank God Troy was in with Josie. He sat down next to me and started talking.
“Ok, so Josie says that Remi’s not mad anymore. But that’s all I could get out of her.”
I let out a huge huff of breath and prayed that this hour went by fast.
“Ok.” I tapped my fingers on the desk until they were hurting me as I waited for the bell to ring.
The bell rang and Troy went to meet up with Josie on ‘their bench’ and I went looking for my girl. I was trying to make her my girl.
I looked through the cafeteria again and didn’t see her, so I went and looked through the windows. I saw her legs but her face and torso were being blocked by some skinny guy with a weird backwards hat on. He was crouched down on his haunches beside her and he talked incessantly about something. She looked like she was in pain or maybe his breath stank.
I walked over to her and sat down as close as I could get. I put my arm around her shoulder and pretended to genuinely be interested in whatever stupid line he was trying to pull with her. By the way, it was the breath.
He looked me over and after a few minutes finally stopped talking.
“Hey man, what’s up?” he said
“Nothing, just came to have lunch with my girl.” I did not just say that out loud.
Remi tensed under my arm, but then relaxed and she didn’t refute it.
“Ok, well, I’ll see you later Remi.” He said as he walked off.
Good…Keep walking cowboy.
She turned in my direction after I unveiled our peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
“You totally saved me. He tried to talk to me in Homeroom and I blew him off, but apparently it didn’t work.”
“Yeah, you looked like you were in pain.” I laughed at her.
“Ugh, you have no idea.”
Then she stopped and looked to the sky for a moment and then back to me.
“I’m sorry Cooper. I really am. I’ve just always been taught
that guys have an ulterior motive in everything they do. But I trust you. I’ve only known you for a week or so, but I really trust you.”
She really was a pistol, she shot in a perfect line and I was her target.
I stopped eating and put my arm back around her shoulders but not before moving her hair away from her ears. I got as close as I could to her ear and whispered, “I’m glad you trust me Remi. I will try my damndest not to hurt you and I’m going to be here for you no matter what.”
She leaned her head against my shoulder for a short time and nodded. Then we went back to eating.
The bell rang and we went our separate ways. I felt like an anvil had been lifted from my chest.
Remi
How could I look into those eyes and say anything less? He looked at me in a way that I’d never seen a boy look at a girl, and never recalled my dad looking at Mom that way. I was such a fool to think otherwise.
I stopped by my locker before I went out to Josie’s car and inside it was a note. It was folded up so little that I almost missed it. I smiled all girly to myself and opened it. I just knew it was from him. It wasn’t.
It was from the bad breath guy, Kevin. It had his phone number and said to call him after school if I wanted to hang out. Oh Lordy, the boy had no clue. I felt like Cooper knew me already and this clown was asking me if I wanted to hang out? Oh boy.
A throat was cleared behind me and I knew who it was without turning. I put the note over my shoulder. I knew he was jonesing to read it. What a nosey Rosey. He paused for a minute, reading the note and then he snorted. I rolled my eyes and turned around smiling.
“What was that for?” I asked with my hand on my hip.
“Did you read this? It’s a joke. What is he twelve?” He looked down to read it again.
“So, it’s a joke to want to hang out with me?” My turn to bait him.
He crumbled the note into a ball all the while staring me down. I tried to step back but my back was against my locker.
“Spending time with you would be an honor for any person. But leaving a girl like you a lame note in her locker all folded up like it’s origami, is a joke. A girl like you needs to be cornered by her locker and asked out like a lady. You know, like I’m doing now.”
I knew there were words coming out of those lips but for the life of me I only caught girl, lame note, origami and asked out like a lady. I squinted my eyes at him.
“Are you asking me out Cooper Neal?” I said. Was it just me or was he getting closer? I could smell the Juicy Fruit gum in his mouth.
“Not yet.” He smiled and took off towards the parking lot.
I barely got a hold of myself before I groaned. “I’m gonna kill him.”
I got home and did some homework. Aunt Brenda went to some kind of Bible study and invited me to go but I declined. I just wanted to stay home.
My text ringtone whistle at me and I went to see who it was.
Cooper: U done with hmwrk yet?
Me: Not yet.
Cooper: Can I call you later?
Me: Not yet.
Cooper: Don’t make me come over there.
Me: Not yet.
Cooper: That’s it!
I didn’t answer the last one. I was laughing too hard for one and for another I was hoping to aggravate him enough to feel my pain. I went out the backdoor and walked around the house waiting for him. He passed me without even looking to the side of the house. He was so irresistible when he was aggravated. Definitely a plus of this whole thing.
He walked up to the front door and knocked like he was the S.W.A.T. team on a drug bust. I tiptoed around the porch as he cupped his hand to the window and tried to look inside. Then he went back to that awful knocking. I snuck up on him and instead of poking him or screaming, I simply blew in his ear. He ducked down to a crouch and was swatting at some unknown flying insect when I couldn’t contain it any more. I fell to my knees laughing until I cried. He turned around to me and glared and I thought I had really pissed him off, but that didn’t stop me from laughing harder.
He just sat there until I slowed my laughter down as much as I could and had his arms crossed over his chest. I had to suck in my cheeks to try to calm my smile down.
He was serious as a heart attack when he said,“Ok, are we even now?”
“Hardly. You left me breathless at my locker like some kind of lame little love sick girl while your gorgeous self just strolled out without a care in the world.”
“All I heard was I made you breathless, you’re love sick and you said I’m gorgeous, which sounds kinda girly.” He was smiling like the cocky little sucker that he was.
I groaned, rolled my eyes and threw my hands in the air. I got up and started to walk back around the house. I needed some cookies.
“Hey, you’re gonna leave me like this? Can’t I come in?”
I screamed around the house, “NOT YET!”
I didn’t sleep at all. I tossed and turned and nearly texted Cooper about seven thousand times. I got our lunches ready and then wrapped up some cinnamon rolls for him in aluminum foil. Josie picked me up and she had a goofy smile on her face and gushed about how she and Troy had talked almost all night.
We parked and Cooper was sitting on the trunk of his car talking to Squeeky Blonde. Well, she was doing most of the talking and twirling while he watched me walk towards him. I went right beside him and tried to get away with giving him his breakfast without having my teeth enamel removed by the shrill of her voice. Josie waved ‘bye’ to me, her arm already linked in Troy’s.
I put it down next to him and turned to walk away. He gently grabbed my shoulder and moved me to stand between his knees and put his chin on the top of my head while she continued to chatter about some kind of Homecoming Dance. She slowed as he moved me in as a buffer but never stopped. He rubbed the tops of my shoulders for a while and I thought I might burst from the feeling it was giving me. He opened his cinnamon rolls and moved his head back to start eating. All I could do was stand there, frozen.
“So Cooper, who are you going with?” I looked around and he was smiling at me while chewing and motioning that he couldn’t talk while he was eating. He wanted me to say something? Oh, I’ll say something.
“Cooper’s taking me.” He nearly choked behind me. Take that Mr. Not Yet.
She shot daggers in my direction and then at his. “Is that so?”
“Yep,” he finally swallowed. “I asked her a couple of days ago.” Liar, Liar, pants on…
“Well, see you later Cooper.”
She turned to go and I turned around and slapped him in the shoulder.
“What the hell?” I wasn’t really mad, but it was funny.
“Oh come on. You saved me from her endless antics. I am forever in your debt. Please don’t make a gorgeous stud like me go alone.”
“Come on Cooper, cut the crap.” I could play around like nobody’s business, but I just wanted to be real with him.
He pulled me back between his knees; he was still on the trunk and looked down at me as serious as could be. He took my hands which were on his knees and picked them up and put them around his waist. My limbs were suddenly made of jelly and I just let him do what he wanted with them.
He started at the crown of my head and with a few fingers traced a chunk of hair down to the ends. I didn’t know my hair was so fascinating, but so glad he found it that way.
When he spoke I smelled my cinnamon rolls, “Ok, let’s cut the crap. You have to know I’m crazy about you. You have to. No pressure. School and studying always comes before me. But I don’t think I can take another day not knowing where we stand.”
“Where do we stand?” It sounded like I was whispering to a baby.
“I want us to be a couple, together, but I know that you have other priorities. Is that what you want?” Why had my heart moved into my ears?
“Yes. But let’s take it slow, ok? I’m warning you though, it’s still your turn to make me breakfast tomorrow.”
“Come on Pistol. You’re gonna be late.”
Did he just call me Pistol?
Cooper
It felt like we had been in this state of limbo forever. It had been less than two weeks since I met her and I felt like it was a lifetime of courting. I came here, hating the situation and hating how I got here, but there’s nowhere on Earth I would rather be right now. And now it wasn’t just me walking around thinking about it all the time, it was real.
We split at my locker and she walked down towards hers. I saw her pull another note from her locker and I laughed this time. Yesterday it was funny. Today, not so much. Boy needed to lay off…and quick.
I got what I needed and walked up to her locker. As I walked past her, I ran my hand across her back, just far enough up for a gentleman, but far enough down to make her shudder. She gasped and spun around, but I just kept on walking.
How ya like them apples, pistol?
In third period we were supposed to be doing some kind of a study guide for the Chapter test on Monday, but Troy and I were passing notes back and forth like fourteen year old girls. He was telling me about staying up all night talking to Josie and that she had already agreed to go to Tunica Hills on Sunday and he asked her to the dance.
I didn’t give as many details, but did clear the air about whether Remi and I were together, which we were. Now I needed to see if she would consider the trip on Sunday. If she wasn’t, I wasn’t going to go. I was not going to be the guy who stood around while the other couple made out.
After class we split ways, Troy to go find Josie and me to find Remi. I heard giggling behind me and just did not even want to deal with it, so I picked up the pace.
“Cooooooooperrrrrrrr.” I put my finger to my ear to see if it was bleeding. Nope, not yet anyway.
“Yeah?” I yelled it over my shoulder.
“I can’t believe you’re taking that Semi girl to the dance. I mean, you could go with me and I would guarantee you a good time.”