Meg nodded, her eyes soft and bright with unshed tears. Tom was studying his coffee again like it might have some answers in there. Wes stumbled on, “I didn’t have room for a lot of feelings. I just needed to keep going until I felt like I’d done right by my brother. Until I was sure that we were both going to be okay.”
“That’s a long time to go without feeling things. Without feeling loved.” Meg looked away, her eyes blinking rapidly.
Wes swallowed hard. She’d zeroed in on what he hadn’t seen for himself. Maybe that was why he’d been so drawn to this place. It was the last place he’d felt loved and cared for. He reached for Rex, burying his fingers in the thick fur around his neck.
“I may not understand all of it completely,” Tom said. “I may not like it, either. But I do understand what it’s like to be in survival mode. I worked my way through vet school. Those years are a blur. And I wasn’t trying to raise a sibling while I was at it.”
Wes had been proving himself for so long. To be taken at face value, to be given grace like this… He swallowed again, and stood. He hadn’t come here to cry like a baby in their living room. “I appreciate you hearing me out. I don’t want to take up your whole morning.”
“Come and see us again,” Meg said. “And if you decide to leave town, you’d better say goodbye this time.”
“Of course.”
Tom reached out and Wes shook his hand. “Sounds like you did well for yourself and your brother.”
“Thank you.” This man had been the only father he’d known, and Wes had to force himself to let go of his hand. He’d lost the right to cling to him when he climbed out his window that night so long ago.
“Go see Emily. The worst that can happen is she says no,” Tom said.
Wes grimaced at the thought. “I don’t suppose you can put in a good word for me?”
He was half joking and Tom knew it. His answering smile had a wry twist, but still lit something warm inside Wes’s chest. “You’re on your own there.”
“As it should be.” Wes turned to Meg. “Thank you for the coffee, for listening to me today and for everything you did for me when I was young.”
“Do not make me cry again, Wes Marlow.” She wagged a finger at him, tears shining on her lashes. “Now go. Take that dog of yours for a hike. Get to know the area again. But come back for coffee sometime.”
“I don’t want to impose,” Wes said. “I walked away. You all have no obligation to me, whatsoever.”
“You were never an obligation,” Meg said quietly. “You were a joy. You were what we wanted. You were family.”
The lump in his throat had grown into a boulder. Wes nodded, and went to the front door, Rex following close at his heels.
When Wes stepped outside and shut the door, the house behind him was silent. Rex trotted up the garden path toward the road, looking back to make sure Wes followed. Clapping his hat on his head, Wes wondered if Tom and Meg felt a little like he did. That him coming back here had mixed the past in with the present, and it wasn’t clear yet whether that was actually a good idea.
CHAPTER FOUR
HER DESK WAS a mess. Emily flopped back in her chair, sending it rolling away from the papers stacked six inches high. Files to review, payments to authorize, decisions to make.
She scrubbed her palms across her forehead in a useless attempt to get her brain to focus. Nope. Wasn’t going to work. Between her lack of sleep and running into Wes this morning, she’d been as scattered as these papers on her desk all day.
The phone call with her mother just now hadn’t helped. Apparently Wes had visited them today. He’d explained to her parents that he’d run away to save his little brother. Then he’d raised him on his own. All the years since Wes left, Emily had sustained herself with anger and indignation. But how could she stay angry when he’d been off doing something so heroic?
But she was angry. Maybe that made her a bad person, but he could have sent a postcard. Even just a few words. I had to help someone. I’m sorry. Anything would have been better than all that silence. All those years of wondering…of worrying…of simply not knowing.
This was ridiculous. Why was she letting someone she hadn’t seen or heard from since high school steal any more of her time and energy? There was so much work to get done. She glanced at the empty coffee mug on her desk. Nope, that was a bad idea. It was six in the evening, and coffee now would steal the sleep she so desperately needed tonight.
The thought of sleep inspired a jaw-aching yawn. Maybe she’d just go home and crawl into bed. She could come in early tomorrow and deal with all this work, as long as there were no other late-night emergencies on the horizon.
As if on cue, there was a knock on the clinic door. Lily, the receptionist, and both the technicians had already left for the day, so Emily pushed herself up from her chair and shuffled across the waiting room to answer. In a small town like Shelter Creek, people didn’t always make an appointment, especially if their animal needed emergency care.
Emily twisted the bolt on the door and pulled it open.
Wes was standing on the doorstep, cowboy hat in hand. Emily took a step back as some traitorous part of her heart lit up at the sight of him. She straightened her shoulders. Whatever her heart was up to, that was just muscle memory, nothing more. “Wes, what are you doing here?”
“I saw your parents today. Did they tell you anything about our conversation?”
She hadn’t expected to have to talk about this with him so soon. Emily took a deep breath, welcoming the cool evening air flooding in from the open door. “They told me why you left. About your little brother. That’s terrible, what happened to him.”
“It was bad.” Wes gave her a tentative smile. “He’s doing well now, though. He just graduated from business school.”
“That’s nice.” It was a lot to take in. Wes had left her to basically become a parent. “It’s impressive that you raised him yourself.”
He shrugged. “We all do what we have to do.”
“Most teenagers don’t have to do what you did.”
He grinned then, that irreverent, mischievous grin she remembered from when they were young. “That’s probably a good thing.”
Emily couldn’t answer. That smile, that self-deprecating humor, it was what she’d first fallen in love with. It paralyzed her now.
“I wasn’t always the best guardian to him,” Wes went on. “I never had any idea what I was doing.”
“You must have done something right.” She was managing to make small talk, but a lot of her mind was busy trying to process this. Her long-lost love standing on her doorstep, dressed like a cowboy from his hat to his boots.
“Your parents mentioned that you’re looking for another vet.”
That pulled her out of her thoughts. “You want to work here?”
“We always said we’d grow up and work together someday.”
“We said that a long time ago. A whole lot has changed since then.” She studied him, trying to understand why he was suddenly interested in their ancient dreams. “You really are serious about wanting to live in Shelter Creek?”
He nodded, his earnest gaze searching her face. What was he looking for? What could he possibly hope to find? “I’ve always missed this town, Emily. I’ve wanted to come back for a long time.”
Old hurt rose up through the layers of her skin. “But you didn’t.”
He looked down at his hat for a moment. “I know I walked away. I never reached out. You have a right to be upset.”
“Upset?” She was tempted to slam the door right in his face. “Wes, you left in the middle of the night after living with us for more than four years. You never said goodbye. You never wrote or called to tell us you were okay.”
“I’m sorry, Emily. I was wrong to leave you like that. I should have at least sent you a note. I’ve always regret
ted that I didn’t.”
She’d wanted those words for so long but now she had no idea how to respond. He regretted not writing. But did he regret leaving her? Had he missed her?
Wes held his hands out, palms up, as if pleading. “I was a kid, Emily. I was doing the best I could.”
“I’m sure you were. But what about the decade and change where you weren’t a kid? We’ve had internet and email and social media for a long time now. You could have reached out. You knew where to find us.”
Wes’s gaze didn’t waver from her face. “I had a lot of reasons. None of them sound too good now. I was ashamed of how I left. I didn’t want to feel the things I might feel, if we were in touch.”
What things? her pathetic heart wanted to ask. She wanted to know if he’d hurt the way she had. He was here now. Maybe he’d held on to some of the feelings they’d had? Or maybe, as her mom had suggested on the phone, he was hoping to find family. Community. Some roots after so many rootless and difficult years.
She studied him. The familiar thick, wavy black hair. The green eyes. Irish roots, that was what her dad had always said about Wes Marlow. He’d been a mystery to her when he’d shown up as her parents’ foster kid her freshman year of high school. He was even more mysterious now, showing up here out of the blue.
She glanced down at his neat, dark jeans and cowboy boots. “You look so Western.”
He grinned. “Life in Texas can rub off on a guy. Plus, I spent a lot of time working on ranches over the years.”
Wes was a real cowboy? He’d been such a city kid when he first moved here. “Did you get your veterinary degree in Texas?”
“At Texas A&M. How about you?”
“UC Davis.”
He peered past her into the clinic. “You’ve fixed the place up.”
“After Dad retired, I figured it could use a face-lift.” Reluctantly, Emily stepped back and waved him in.
Once inside, he turned in a slow circle, taking in the pale lavender walls, the neutral upholstery, the gray tiled floor. Suddenly he grinned and she remembered with a pang how they’d laughed together, way back when. “You made it kind of girlie.”
Her hands went to her hips, instantly defensive. “I’m a girl vet. Why not?”
“It’s nice. I was just wondering what all the old-timers in Shelter Creek thought the first time they walked in and saw the pink walls.”
“They’re lavender, and they didn’t say anything.” They had, actually, but she wouldn’t admit it to Wes. A lot of the ranchers in the area hadn’t wanted to work with Doc Fielding’s “little girl” when Emily had first taken over her father’s practice. But they hadn’t had too much choice since she was the only vet in town. The lavender walls had been an act of defiance, when she’d realized that some folks were going to judge her, and find her lacking, just for being a woman. It wouldn’t really matter how she acted, or what color she painted her waiting room, they’d still think she wasn’t up to the job.
Wes peered into the office that had been her father’s. “Doing a little paperwork?”
The sarcastic note in his voice raised her defenses. “Look, I don’t know what you hoped to find, coming back here after so much time…”
The phone rang then, and they both waited, letting the call go to voice mail. A teary voice came on. “Emily, are you there? Please pick up.”
This was why Emily still used an old, manual voice mail machine. She reached over the reception desk for the phone. “Hello, this is Emily.”
It was Haley Erwin, who ran the boarding stable southeast of Shelter Creek. “Two Socks got into some barbed wire. It’s looking pretty bad. Can you come over?”
Two Socks was one of Haley’s own horses. A big gelding, over sixteen hands, with an unpredictable personality. “Okay, Haley, keep him calm. Can you get him into a clean environment?”
“I have him in the wash area by the barn.”
“Perfect. Try to disinfect the cement around him as much as possible. I’ll be there in twenty minutes.”
Now she wished she’d made that pot of coffee she’d been dreaming about before Wes showed up. Emily turned to him. “I’ve got to go. A horse and barbed wire, never a good combination.”
“Let me come with you. I can help out.”
“No.” The word came out strangely loud and Emily’s face heated. Her parents had sent him here. She should be considering him for the job. But how could she work with Wes?
If he noticed her rudeness he didn’t flinch. Instead the expression on his face was calm, his slight smile kind. “Are you sure? I’m an experienced vet. After I got my degree, I worked in a large animal practice.”
“Really?”
“When I lived here I used to love going out to the ranches with your dad. It made me want to work with large animals. To try to solve problems out in the field, like he did.”
The angry girl inside wanted to throw it back in his face. To ask why, if her father had been so important to him, Wes had left without a word and hurt him so badly. But he’d explained. Her parents had accepted his story. Plus, now wasn’t the time. A horse was in pain.
His offer was tempting. Two Socks had given her so much trouble on past visits. And from the sound of Haley’s voice, she wasn’t going to be very calm or helpful. Emily could call a friend for help. Caleb Dunne was great with horses; maybe he’d have time to come with her. But Wes was right here. The fact that she didn’t want to spend time with him paled in comparison with a horse who needed help now. “I’m not paying you. And this is not some kind of audition for the job. This is just because you happen to be here, and this horse can be difficult.”
“I’ve got it. Do you have what you need for sutures?”
“Of course. My truck is fully stocked.” Emily went to the closet in her office to grab the thick down coat she kept there for surprise evening calls. “Let’s get going.”
Wes followed her out the clinic door. At her truck, he went toward the driver’s side, then clapped a hand to his forehead. “Sorry, automatic reaction.”
Emily shook her head in disbelief. Such a guy thing to do, assuming that he was in charge when he’d only shown up here a few moments ago. “This is my case,” she reminded him as she unlocked the truck. “You’re coming along to assist.”
“I get it.” He slid into the passenger’s seat and buckled up.
Emily took a shaky breath. Just sitting next to Wes opened the floodgates to a wave of memories. The way he used to stumble out of his room in the mornings with tousled hair and a sleepy smile just for her. Their first kiss, so hesitant and careful, one evening when they’d taken her dog out for a walk. Sitting at the kitchen table studying for an exam, feeling the energy radiating from him, just as she could feel it now. Could she even drive with him in the cab? Could she think straight on this case if he was with her? “Maybe this is a bad idea.”
“You said the horse is tough to work with. I can help with that. I promise.”
“I hope you’re right.” She started the truck and turned toward downtown Shelter Creek. She’d need to cross town to get to Haley’s property. They were quiet for a few moments and she tried to get used to the idea of Wes Marlow, in the cab with her. Assisting her on a call. “This is surreal.”
“Right?” Wes gestured to the town around them. “There have been so many changes here. Look at all these restaurants and art galleries. And wine tasting rooms. How’d everything get so fancy?”
She’d been thinking about Wes and he’d been thinking about Shelter Creek. It hadn’t taken five minutes for him to start taking up way too much space in her mind. She should never forget how easily he left her behind. How she’d already spent way too many days of her life thinking about him. “I meant, it’s surreal, driving in a truck with you. Seeing you. You look the same, except all grown up.”
“Ah.” He gave her a look she could fee
l, even though she kept her eyes on the road. “You look the same, too. Except better.”
That had her glancing his way. “Better, how?”
He suddenly looked flustered. “Just…better.”
Maybe she was shallow but it was gratifying to know that he might be wrestling with a regret or two. Still, there was no way she was going down that path with him. “You’re right, the town has changed. A lot of the ranching land around here has been turned into vineyards. Thus the tourists, the wine tasting rooms and the art galleries.”
“It looks nice. I’m looking forward to trying out some of the new restaurants. Want to grab some dinner after this?”
Emily could barely contain her disbelief. Did he think he could just show up in town fifteen years later and act like nothing had happened? Like they were buddies who would “grab some dinner”? “No, thank you.”
After a few awkwardly quiet minutes, they reached the driveway to Haley’s stable. Emily slowed and waited for an oncoming car to pass.
“I remember this place,” Wes said. “You used to board your horse here.”
“Shadow. He was such a good guy.”
“What happened to him? He was in his teens back then, right?”
“Yeah. He lived to be twenty-eight. Then he got a case of colic that even my father couldn’t fix. We had to put him down.” It was still hard to talk about losing her beautiful old horse. Emily turned down the drive. “I miss him.”
“That must have been hard. You’ve never gotten another horse?”
She shook her head. “I don’t have time for that now.”
She guided the truck past the first neat red-painted barn, the outdoor arena, then the indoor one. By the biggest barn there was a paved wash area. It was getting dark out, but Haley had the area lighted. Emily could see Two Socks, standing on three legs. Haley, in her sixties now, her long salt-and-pepper hair pulled back in a ponytail, walked toward them, waving.
Emily rolled down the window. “Hi, Haley,” she called. “Is it okay if I park right up here by Two Socks?”
Haley clasped her hands as if in prayer. “Thanks so much for coming, Emily. Park wherever you want.”
Harlequin Heartwarming March 21 Box Set Page 4