That put her on edge.
Standing, she got ready to leave.
“What? No comment?”
“Exactly.”
She could see it was going nowhere.
“Am I in danger? Is this Kaleb Meeks? Is he leaving bodies to scare me?”
Hell!
It could be for all she knew.
“We can’t find him. Apparently, he’s hiding.”
“Be careful with him. He’s dangerous. He likes to poison people. In fact, he isn’t really careful. One day, he’s going to hurt someone or himself.”
Yeah, Elizabeth was almost that someone. The warning was a little too late.
“Stick around, Marie. I might have to ask you more questions. If more bodies show up…”
“I know. I’m a suspect. I don’t know how since I have an alibi, but whatever.”
Well, at least she didn’t have to tell her that. The woman was smart enough to figure it out on her own.
As she was making notes and searching for information on Jasper Butler, she heard him approach.
“Ready, Christopher?”
He didn’t have a choice.
She was the boss, and he was her employee.
“Yes.”
“Good, let’s go.”
Outside, Elizabeth gave both husbands a kiss, and she was proud that neither said a word.
In fact, they were absolutely silent.
She wanted to rejoice.
Their lack of bitching was probably a good thing, since that meant they didn’t ask her what she learned from the priestess. If they found out she was doing an interview, and with Chris, they would flip out. The two of them were way too overprotective.
As they headed down the street, she put her arm through his. “You know I love you, right?” she asked Chris.
He did. “Life is complicated. I remember when things were black and white.”
Yeah, so did she.
Now she was a little worried that he didn’t answer her question.
“Remember that time in Boston when we had to do an interview? It was right after ‘The Butcher’ struck,” Elizabeth asked.
“Yeah, we took a little trip and scared that parking garage attendant. I was so damn badass that night. I was head over heels in love, and I wanted to prove to you that I could protect you.”
“I know you did. You’ve never let me down. You’ve kept me safe,” she offered.
Chris knew that was total BS. Out of the two of them, she was the fighter, and he was the one always having to be babysat. He really hated that. For once, he wanted to prove that he brought something to their relationship.
Chris wanted to be strong.
“Why the trip down memory lane?” he asked, holding her hand with his as it sat on his arm.
“Want to help me do an interview again? You know…for old time’s sake—Lyzee and Chris—Doctor Death and Badass Elizabeth ride again?”
He glanced over at her. “Seriously? You want me to help you in the field?” He really thought they were simply going to breakfast to talk. That he was dreading.
This…he was more than happy to be her partner again.
“Yep.”
Now he was smiling. “I think I’d really like that,” he offered. Spending time with her always healed that pain. She was like medicine to his heart.
“Thank you, honey.”
“It’s my pleasure.”
Elizabeth needed to show the man that they still had faith in him. He was dinged up, but he was still a Fed. Cutting him a little break and spending some time with him in the field would, hopefully, give him back his confidence.
“Well, then let’s go. Then we’ll have breakfast, and I’m not buying. In honor of our interview, you get to take me out.”
He laughed. “There’s a first time for everything, and it would be my pleasure.”
Elizabeth had to reach him. This was her last chance, and it had to work. She didn’t want her friend to hurt.
She loved him too much.
Callen and Ethan watched them walk away. A part of Ethan was fraying at the seams. He was so damn angry at that moment that he wanted to hurt someone.
“We should go,” he muttered.
Callen had seen his brother’s face when Elizabeth left them behind. He knew she was trying to heal Chris’s heart, but in the process, she was damaging another.
Only she didn’t see it.
When the truth finally came out, he had to hope that no one did anything stupid.
Like fight.
Call names.
Oh…get a divorce.
“Ethan…”
His brother cut him off.
“I don’t want to talk about it. You do the meeting and I’ll get that warrant. When I’m done, I’ll call you, okay?”
Callen wished he had something to say that would make his brother feel better. He knew how he felt. He hated when Elizabeth doted on anyone but them.
They were men.
Husbands.
Partners.
It was a bitter pill for them to swallow, but there wasn’t a choice. They’d married Elizabeth and they knew she had people in her life before them.
It was simply how she rolled.
Callen saw her struggling to come to grips with the possibility of losing Chris to all of this. She was walking a thin line.
She was doing battle on all fronts.
“Ethan,” he tried again, and once more, he was cut off. He hoped he could get through to his brother. If he could, he might be able to spare them both all of this pain.
“I can’t, Cal. I just can’t.”
He let it go.
What choice did he have?
Getting Ethan Blackhawk to talk wasn’t going to happen. When he wanted to think, he’d go inside himself until he was ready.
“Okay, call me when you get the warrant.”
Blackhawk walked away, saying nothing more. He needed to calm his temper down. He couldn’t lose it. He needed to think like a Deputy Director, not some jealous husband.
It was just so hard.
He really believed he was losing his wife.
And to a friend.
Chapter Seventeen
Friday Morning
The tap dance in the judge’s office wasn’t too difficult. When the FBI deputy director rolled in, it got the attention it deserved. Ethan had argued his case, gave the judge the details of what they thought they’d find, and then crossed his fingers as he waited for the outcome.
When the man signed off, he was glad he could still pull that off. Glancing down at his watch, Blackhawk knew that his brother wouldn’t be done meeting with the mayor, so he had some time to burn.
He needed to handle a few things.
First, he called Gabe to bring him up to speed. When the man asked how Elizabeth was doing in the field in her new position, he didn’t have to lie. She’d had it under control. When Gabe asked how he was doing as the profiler, that’s when the lies started flowing.
In fact, the entire time, his temper simmered.
He was fine with it, unless you took into account that his wife had pretty much walked away, picking another person to be her partner.
Or at least that was how he saw it.
When she said he was just the profiler, she wasn’t kidding, and that stung.
It hit the target right in the center of his heart.
Still, he’d BS his way through it for Gabe. He didn’t need the man sniffing around, asking questions, or telling him this is why married couples shouldn’t work together.
That would only make it a million times worse. Ethan didn’t want someone telling him he knew how it felt. What he wanted was for his wife to need him.
He wanted Elizabeth to tell him to saddle up—like she once used to when they were working a case. Now Callen was her partner, Livy would be teamed up on local cases, but he…he was just the profiler.
His usefulness had come to the end.
He was just a deputy
director in a world of agents. He was destined to watch from the outside of his wife’s new world.
It broke his heart.
In that moment, he wished they never left FBI West. He’d gained prestige, but lost something so much more valuable.
He lost his partner.
After he finished that call, he headed toward the B&B. Callista Gaines was there, and he needed an update on the situation. A part of him secretly hoped that she’d yank Chris’s certification, if only for this case.
Ethan hated that he was even going there, but he was.
He was jealous on a whole new level. Never in his marriage had he ever felt threatened, and that was saying a lot since they shared their bed with another man.
Yet, with Callen, it was different.
They were a family.
Now, he wasn’t the center of Elizabeth’s world. She didn’t need him around anymore. Chris had saved the day, pointing them at this shitty vampire disease.
Honestly, Ethan was scared.
If she didn’t need him in the field, what about their personal life? When would she wake up and see that he wasn’t bringing anything to the table anymore. This had been his fear all these years from the day he’d gotten her to fall in love.
First came Callen.
Then this babying of Christopher Leonard.
Soon, he’d just disappear into the surroundings, and that made his heart ache.
Keeping his composure, Ethan tried to focus on the task at hand. He was the boss.
He needed to act like one.
His own personal demons had to stay buried for the sake of the case, team, and his relationship.
When he knocked on Callista’s door, her husband opened it with a smile on his face. “Director, we’re just waking up. Callie is having coffee. Care to join us?”
“I’d love some.”
Ethan followed him inside. He prayed the woman inside would help him bank the fires beginning to burn in his gut. Maybe she’d give him something to chase the fear away.
He desperately needed it.
“Ethan! How are you?” Callie asked, southern drawl out along with that calming smile.
“I’m doing well, Doctor. I’m sorry that I haven’t been able to be more attentive while you’re here.”
She hugged him. “Don’t be crazy. Quinton and I can find things to keep us busy.”
The man laughed. “We could get pregnant again,” he offered.
“Don’t do it, Quinton Gaines. I’ll hurt you.”
He winked at her.
“What can I do for you?” she asked. “Surely, you’re not popping in at this time of the day for a social call.”
Yeah, he wasn’t.
“Part was to make sure you were okay, and the rest was to get an update on Doctor Leonard. I need to make sure he’s safe to be in the field.”
Since he was off with his wife.
Alone.
Playing bodyguard when he shouldn’t be…
Callie took a seat.
“Care to join me?”
Ethan did just that. He had to be careful. This woman was one of the few who could see right through him. She’d be analyzing him before he knew it.
He didn’t need that.
“Sure. Thank you, Doctor.”
“Callista or Callie.”
“Thank you, Callista.”
Quinn handed the man some coffee. “While you talk shop, I’ll make myself scarce.”
He headed off to the shower, whistling a happy tune.
Ethan wished he was happy like that.
He wished he didn’t feel like there was a giant sucking hole in the center of his heart.
“How was Chris’s evaluation?”
“Oh, he’s doing better. He simply needed to get everything off his chest.”
He waited for her to share it.
Maybe if he knew what the man was thinking, he could then find peace.
Callie laughed. “What?”
“Aren’t you going to elaborate?”
“You know I can’t tell you what was said.”
Ethan knew how to play this game. “Actually, Doctor, as his boss, I’m asking for the sake of the team, not my own personal curiosity. I have to ensure that he’s able to handle himself in the field.”
Callie knew the man wasn’t happy.
She’d spent enough time with him.
“I didn’t make notes in his file. You’ll have to take my assessment for what it is.”
“Why not?” he asked. “When I’ve asked to see a file, you’ve never had a problem with it.”
“Ethan.”
“I need to know.”
“You do, as his boss have a right to know, but this is more a personal thing, Ethan. It involves your wife, and I can’t give you anything that was said. It’s a conflict of interest. Just asking is an issue, and you know that.”
He wanted to be sick.
Ethan wanted to be angry.
“So, he talked about MY WIFE.”
She heard it in his voice.
Ethan had anger issues, and here they were, surfacing. It wasn’t as if she was shocked.
After what he lived through, there would always be this reoccurrence of anger.
It was natural.
It was expected.
“Yes, we discussed Elizabeth, his past, and even you and Callen. Don’t jump to any conclusions, Ethan. It won’t make this easier on you.”
The man was getting angrier and angrier.
His wife’s dismissal, her doting on the other man, and now the doctor refusing to calm his fears was only doing one thing. It was adding fuel to the bubbling, toxic brew.
“He’s safe to be in the field. If anything, your wife is incredibly safe with him. Doctor Leonard will protect her at all costs.”
“I see.”
While she may have thought that was what he wanted to hear, it was far from the truth. He wanted anything but that.
Elizabeth didn’t need him.
This was one more part of him stripped away. Now he wasn’t even going to be her protector.
That part of him that swallowed so much to be in a relationship with her festered. He’d shared her with Callen, he’d let the wounded man move into their home, and he’d swallowed his anger.
For her.
Always for her.
Now it was going to break him.
“Ethan.”
“It’s okay, Doctor. I’m fine.”
She knew he wasn’t.
When Ethan was upset, he would preen. He’d already brushed invisible lint from his sleeve, fixed his shirt, and ran his hands through his hair. It had been loose, and now it was securely pulled back at the nape of his neck.
He was reverting, and she could watch it evolving before her.
He was far from okay.
“If you like, Ethan, we can talk about what has you so stirred up.”
He laughed.
“Yeah, no.”
“Why not?”
“Maybe because my mandated therapy is over, so I’ll pass. I’m perfectly fine, Doctor. After all, what could possibly be wrong? I have an amazing job, a terrific family, and I get to work with the people I love.”
She wanted to press, but he’d closed the door between them. With him, you couldn’t force. Ethan was an enigma, and he liked it that way. Maybe because he played in the minds of madmen he had to be, but she could see the fuse.
It was lit.
It was on a slow burn, and at some point, it was going to blow.
“Ethan.”
He cut her off. “Since you’ll not let me see the file, I’ll simply ask this. Is he fit for fulltime duty in the morgue? Just give me your answer to the best of your judgement. If you have even the slightest hesitation, I want him pulled and sent back home.”
She wanted to help him.
Callie knew what he was doing.
Ethan Blackhawk was jealous of another man. She really wished she could tell him what Chris had said, rea
ssuring him that his love for Ethan’s wife was nothing sexual.
She knew him.
If he understood, he’d be okay with it.
Still…
Doctor patient confidentiality had her hands tied.
“Well?”
“He’ll hold up under the strain, and in my professional opinion, isolating him will only exacerbate the situation. The more he’s with your wife and team, the better he’ll be. Doctor Leonard needs his family.”
Yeah, Ethan’s family.
His loved ones.
His wife.
“Thank you, Doctor.”
He went to stand.
“Ethan.”
He stared at her with blue-black eyes, and she could see the anger in them.
“He’s going to need multiple sessions. I’ll be more than happy to do them. I can head to Quantico every week. I don’t mind.”
He nodded.
“Fine.”
“He needs to have people who trust in his skill. He feels like he’s to blame for his wife’s death. He’s allowing that pain to leach into his other relationships.”
Blackhawk knew she was trying to give him something.
“So, what you’re telling me is that he’s incredibly attached to Elizabeth.”
“Yes, he is. That’s why she’s safe with him. He feels like he’s failed Cyra, but he can’t fail Elizabeth.”
Ethan nodded. “Thank you.”
“You don’t like that Elizabeth loves him, do you?”
She hit the nail right on the head.
“Are you asking between two employees, or between my doctor and myself, with that same doctor-patient confidentiality?”
“The latter.”
Callie wished she could fix him. He may have made leaps and bounds, but when his family, and what he fought so hard to keep, were threatened, all rational went out the window.
“Your wife loves you and Callen very much. She’d never do anything to hurt you.”
It was wrong, but he needed to see that for sure.
He was so afraid that it was rattling his cage—maybe more than when he was abducted.
In all his other relationships, prior to Elizabeth, he never got jealous.
He never cared enough.
But this?
It was pissing him off.
Enough was enough.
Blood Shall Run (An FBI Romance Thriller Book 15) Page 45