by Toler, B N
Her gaze dropped for a brief moment before meeting mine again, confidence and courage steeled in her stare. “If you’re going to finally take me the way we both want you to?”
My heart thundered in my ears with her words as months of desire gripped me. Stepping inside, I pulled her to me before pressing my lips to hers. When she moaned softly in my mouth, I couldn’t bear it anymore. I needed to feel her.
I snapped the book closed. “Eh…” I said awkwardly. “I think this is a good place to stop. Maybe let Emalee finish it with you tomorrow.”
Her sparkling eyes clearly indicated she was laughing at me. Kissing her on the forehead, I said, “If you want to know what happened, they went inside and read Bible verses together.” She made a muffled laughing sound through her oxygen mask. I loved my mom and would do anything for her, but reading a sex scene to her was a bit more than I could handle. With perfect timing, Joe entered the room, and I turned to leave.
I. Love. You. Cole.
I looked back to her and winked. “I love you more, Mom.”
By the time I made it upstairs, Bailor was in his room, freeing up the shower for me. Turning the faucet, I kept the water cold. Like Charles, I was facing a bit of my own summer heatwave-woman-voodoo and needed to cool off quick. What the hell are you doing? While the shower ran, I went to my room across the hall and tugged my shirt off, tossing it to the hamper by my window. My aim sucked and the sweat-soaked shirt flopped to the floor, and as I rounded the bed to pick it up, something outside caught my eye.
Emalee was riding her bike down our driveway. She’d left at least ten or fifteen minutes ago, hadn’t she? Wondering what had kept her, I leaned my arm against the window frame and watched her until she disappeared.
The festival was in a wide field, complete with the classic fair staples like a Ferris wheel and games where you win stuffed animals bigger than most children. The stage set-up was very simple with a backdrop that said There’s No Place Like Kansas. Two older ladies known as the Wichita Sisters were currently on stage belting out a duet they’d written filled with good clean sexual innuendo that made the small crowd chuckle.
In terms of size, the venue was a drop in the bucket, as my father called it, but I still took it seriously. I would perform for this little Kansas town with as much enthusiasm as I would for any big-city crowd. I was adjusting my guitar strap when someone called my name from behind me.
I spun around and pressed on a friendly smile, shoving down my disappointment when I saw who it was. Ugh. Drug Store Jerk Darren. His goofy friend Justin was with him and some other guy I didn’t recognize.
“How’s it going, Emalee?” Darren asked as they stopped in front of me. Darren was attractive in a small-town kind of way, but he didn’t hold a candle to any of the Kepner brothers.
“Going good,” I replied. “You guys enjoying the festival?”
The unknown friend snickered. “Enjoying it a lot more right about now.” The three of them chuckled like I was on the outside of their inside joke. Annoyed, I blinked a few times then did as I always did—around or through, Em.
“Well, I go on in a few,” I said, hoping they’d take the hint and leave so I could prepare. “I hope y’all enjoy the show.”
“Oh, yeah, good luck,” Darren offered.
“It was nice to meet you. I’m Lou, by the way,” the third guy said, extending his hand.
“Nice to meet you,” I replied as we shook, but when I went to pull my hand away, he squeezed mine harder.
“Maybe we could get to know each other a little more after your performance.” His smile was tight, and something in my gut knotted with unease. I didn’t like how close he was standing, and I certainly wasn’t crazy about the way he kept letting his eyes drop to my chest.
“I’m afraid I can’t tonight, but you guys have fun.”
When he still didn’t release my hand, every muscle in my body tensed. “Well, that’s a shame. How about tomorrow?” He was trying to make me uncomfortable to get me to agree to see him before he’d leave me alone.
I dropped my forced smile. “Can’t tomorrow either.”
He stepped toward me and in my peripheral vision I saw Justin and Darren shuffle awkwardly. Apparently, Lou was making them uncomfortable too, but not enough for them to intervene. Cowards. “If I didn’t know any better, Emalee,” Lou said. “I’d think you didn’t like us.”
The thing about being a woman is we’re taught to be cautious of every man. It’s a yo-yo of common sense versus open-mindedness. It’s hard to be cautious and friendly to someone at the same time. No woman really wants to come off as rude or unable to take a joke, but no woman wants to be patronized or belittled, either.
Opting to go through, rather than around, this obstacle, I locked my gaze with his and tilted my head. “As first impressions go, no, I don’t think I like you very much, Lou.” I yanked my hand back with force before looking to Darren and Justin. “You guys should go.”
“We’ll see you around,” Darren sputtered as he grabbed Lou’s shoulder and tried pulling him back.
Lou’s mouth turned up as he backed away, never taking his eyes off of me. “I’m going to change your mind, Emalee,” he promised. “We’re going to be really good friends.”
“Come on, Lou. Let’s go,” Darren demanded.
When the three disappeared into the darkness, I turned and let out a shaky breath. What in the actual hell was that? I’d never had any guy speak to me so…I didn’t even know what to call it. I’d felt threatened even though he hadn’t actually threatened me.
I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths to steady myself. Why did guys have to be such jerks? I hate boys. No, that wasn’t true. There were a few I liked. One in particular. Cole’s image rolled through my mind and I wanted to growl in frustration. I did not want to like him, and he’d given me plenty of reasons not to, but there were moments where that hard exterior of his dropped, and I could see his soft underbelly.
How does a girl fall for a guy by watching the way he loves another woman?
Easy. When the other woman is his mother.
The night before, I’d heard Cole reading the book I’d been reading to Constance. My heart felt like melted wax, hot and gooey. He was reading to his mother. Reading with conviction and giving the characters their own voices. I’d stood stock still on the porch for several minutes listening to him read, not even fully aware that I was eavesdropping until Cole had reached the beginning of a pretty steamy sex scene and snapped the book closed.
As I’d tip-toed toward the steps, I could just make out his voice as he’d said, “I love you more, Mom.”
I’d pedaled off as fast as I could, smiling as I thought about how closed-off Cole tried to be, but knowing there was a whole lot of warmth behind it all.
“He just read her a book,” I said quietly to myself as I waited for my cue to take the stage. “Don’t romanticize it.” I rolled my eyes at myself. I was shamefully cliché. The girl crushing on the broody guy, knowing I had already romanticized it. Though Cole was rude to me most of the time, there were pieces of him that were perfect. When you put those pieces together you got most of a puzzle depicting a kind and admirable man. Those were the pieces I was falling for. The other pieces I found myself pretending didn’t matter.
“Up next is the lovely and audacious Emalee Jennings!” one of the Wichita Sisters told the crowd, drawing me from my thoughts. Shaking off my thoughts about Cole, I pressed on my best stage smile and joined them.
It was showtime.
I’d just climbed out of the shower when I heard Joe holler from downstairs. Towel around my waist, I rushed to the stairway and found him waiting at the bottom.
“Is Mom okay?” I asked a little breathless.
“Bailor just called,” he stated ignoring my question and obvious panic. “Colleen Harper’s car is broken down and they need you to pick them up.”
I shook my head releasing a frustrated breath. Bailor hadn’t been on a date in almost a year bu
t all of a sudden, he’d decided to ask newly divorced Colleen out to the town festival. He’d wrapped up his day early so he could be ready in time for her to pick him up, and I’d been stuck with my work and his. All I wanted to do was crash, but it looked like I was going to have to head into town.
“Do you need help with Mom before I go?” I asked.
He shook his head as he wheeled backwards down the hall. “Nah, she’s sleeping right now.”
Throwing on a clean t-shirt and jeans, I ran my hand through my wet hair and hustled downstairs and called out, “I’ll be back in a bit.”
Once I got to the festival, I found Colleen’s car pretty easily, but there was no sign of her or my bone-head brother. My frustration morphed into anger. Why the hell would he call me and not be by the car when I got here? The ticket booth was empty when I reached the entrance of the festival, but I didn’t bother waiting since I only planned on being there long enough to drag my brother out of there, wherever he was.
I trudged toward the rides, skirting around the people crowded around the stage just as the current performance ended and a woman said into the microphone, “Up next is the lovely and audacious Emalee Jennings!”
I stopped in my tracks, turning toward the stage as Emalee appeared, beaming a big bright smile. The crowd clapped awkwardly from where they sat on blankets and camping chairs scattered on the lawn in front of the stage.
Standing in front of the mic, Emalee lowered it so that it was level with her mouth. “Hey everyone! How are we doing this evening?”
A few people spoke out, a few letting out a howl in response. “Well, I appreciate y’all coming out tonight, and I have a few songs I’d like to play, and well…I hope you like them.”
As she strummed her guitar, she raised her chin and continued to grin. I didn’t doubt the small crowd was a disappointment, but to look at her you wouldn’t know it. A few people’s heads were bobbing, but I hadn’t heard the song before.
“There you are,” Bailor said as he grabbed my shoulder. “We’ve been waiting out by the car for you.”
I cut him a lethal glare. “Bullshit.”
He grinned, pretending to ignore me. Colleen was right beside him tearing cotton candy from a stick and shoving it in her mouth. “Looks like you found a good spot to enjoy the show,” he stated.
I hadn’t realized I’d gravitated toward the stage and was standing in Emalee’s sightline.
She finished her song, and as the crowd applauded I told Bailor, “Let’s go look at Colleen’s car. I want to get home.”
“Why do you want to look at my car?” Colleen mumbled around the sugar lint in her mouth.
“Because Bailor…” my words trailed off as I realized Emalee was looking right at me. Her stage smile fell a fraction before settling into something softer; something that resembled shocked happiness. Guilt hit me in the gut. She thought I’d come to see her.
Furious at his scheming, I locked eyes with Bailor, my voice brooking no argument as I gritted out, “I’m leaving. Now.”
I moved to leave as Emalee spoke to the crowd. “I got to sing this song with a very special lady this past week.” Her voice was kind and reflective. “I think I’ll play it for you tonight.” She began playing Tanya Tucker’s If Your Heart Ain’t Busy Tonight, stopping me in my tracks and forcing me to turn back toward her.
People stood, clapping and swaying with the beat, and Emalee’s smile grew at the crowd’s response.
I glanced at Bailor and he wasn’t grinning anymore. He was watching me. It fully sank in that he’d tricked me into coming to the festival for the sole purpose of seeing Emalee. I stepped toward him. “Leave it, Bailor. I mean it. Let this go.” I motioned toward her. “I don’t want her.”
Bailor’s brows furrowed slightly. He looked back at the stage and shrugged. “I love you, little brother, but you’re a fool. You’re going to regret it the rest of your life. I promise you that.”
Emalee was wrapping up the song as I hustled away. I didn’t look back. I couldn’t. I had to stay away from her. Whenever she was visiting my mother, I would stay outside or leave. It would only be a few more months. I wouldn’t be a complete asshole to her, but I wasn’t going to be chummy either.
When I got to the truck, I realized Bailor hadn’t followed me. Good. I needed the space, especially since I felt like pelting him in the face. I went to start the truck and the motor wouldn’t turn over. I tried it again a few times before punching the dash. The battery was dead. I was going to need a jump which meant I needed to find Bailor and his date so I could use her car. Climbing out, the old door made a shrill squeak as I slammed it shut.
I re-entered the festival, muttering promises to punish my brother for wasting my night. I could’ve been home, asleep in my bed if he hadn’t called. Instead, I was walking around looking like a half-crazed lunatic because I hadn’t bothered to put on decent clothes or even comb my hair before I hightailed it up there to help Bailor. After searching everywhere, I headed back toward the stage again, not knowing where else to look. The festival was shutting down; the food carts were closing up and most of the lights had been cut off. Off to the side of the stage, I noticed Emalee standing by her guitar case, her arms crossed. She was looking around, stretching her neck, and I found myself looking around too. Was she looking for me? Then I wondered how she was getting home. Maybe she was looking for her mom and dad.
At that moment I didn’t have a ride to offer, but even if I had I knew I would’ve made every excuse in the book not to ask her if I could take her home.
Bailor. Focus on finding your asshole brother. Just as I was about to turn away, some creepy guy approached Emalee from behind, but I could tell she was too busy searching the thinning crowd to sense him coming up behind her.
I didn’t recognize him, which sent a wave of unease through me, but I hesitated for a moment, battling myself. He looked shady as hell, but maybe she knew him. When he was close enough, he pressed against her back and put his face in her neck, his lips moving enough that I could tell he was speaking to her. Emalee immediately jerked away and spun around, her features contorting in fear as she held her hands up, clearly warning him not to come closer. In such a hurry to back away from the guy, she tripped and fell on her ass.
I broke out in a run. She managed to get back on her feet quickly just as the guy stepped toward her, a stupid grin on his face as he watched her struggle to get up. I moved swiftly and stepped between them, my back to Emalee, blocking him from her.
“You know, even from twenty yards away I could tell she didn’t want you anywhere near her. Funny how you seemed to have missed that from only two feet away.”
He reared back. “She’s a friend,” he insisted. “Tell him, Emalee.”
“I don’t know him,” she said, her voice quiet but firm. “He was with Darren and Justin before I went on stage.”
I nodded in understanding. Just knowing he was affiliated with Darren and Justin made this guy a class-A douche. “She says she doesn’t know you. You need to go. Now.”
The guy smirked like I was no big deal, revealing tobacco-stained teeth. “You her boyfriend?”
“No, but I am the guy who’ll break your nose if you don’t get the hell out of here.” When the guy showed no sign of backing down I continued, “You know, on second thought, maybe I’ll just break it anyway as a reminder that you never touch a woman without her permission.”
“Is there a problem here?” We all jerked our heads toward Bailor standing a few feet away, arms crossed. He’d dropped his usually friendly composure and now wore an expression of stone.
The guy backed away putting his hands up in surrender. “I was just being friendly is all. Didn’t mean any harm.” After a few more steps backward, he finally spun around and slithered off.
“Good thing I showed up when I did.” Bailor’s mouth lifted on one side. “You ladies might’ve gotten hurt.”
I ignored his slight and turned back to Emalee. “You alright?”<
br />
Her eyes were wide as she nodded, clearly shaken. She wrapped her arms around my waist and rested her head against my chest. “Thank you, Cole. I thought I’d been clear with him earlier, but I guess not.”
Bailor and I glanced at each other. The guy had bothered her twice in one night? I didn’t like that. Neither did Bailor, his voice tight as he asked, “Are your folks here, Emalee?”
She pulled away and looked down at her dress, smoothing invisible wrinkles. “My father was. Right before I went on, he said he’d meet me here after the show. I haven’t seen him.”
By now the festival attendants had dissipated to just a few workers and us. Her father was nowhere to be seen. Looking at Bailor I said, “The truck battery is dead. I was trying to find you when I saw that guy bothering Emalee.”
Bailor jabbed a thumb toward the parking lot. “Colleen is waiting. I saw the truck still here and came back in looking for you.” Reaching down, he grabbed Emalee’s guitar case and jutted his head. “Come on, Tanya Tucker. We can give you a lift.”
The corner of her mouth turned up slightly. She was trying to be a good sport, but she was still a little shaken. When we got out to the parking lot, Emalee sat in the truck while Bailor and I jumped it.
After letting the truck run for a few minutes, Bailor disconnected the cables and gave me a pat on the back. “Colleen wants to stop at the diner. She’s still hungry.”
I inhaled deeply through my nose. That meant I would have to give Emalee a ride home. She’d already had a rough night, and even though I wasn’t thrilled at having to be alone with her, again, I hid my frustration and gave a wave to Colleen. “Good seeing you, Colleen.”
Once we were on the road, she stared out the window, chewing on her thumbnail. We rode in silence, and I knew I should try to make conversation, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I figured Emalee hadn’t exactly been short on words when we’d been together in the past, so if she wanted to talk, she would.
We were halfway through town when she suddenly lurched forward. “Stop,” she demanded.