“I’ll go check, but I doubt it. She didn’t make any friends. Frankly, she only ever looked happy when she heard from you or Detective Carpenter.”
There was no time to even start to process how Ellie felt about this. “Yes, please go check. I’ll get the word out to my colleagues.”
She hastened back down the stairs to inform Valerie about the situation.
“There’s a small chance we’re lucky, and she’s just hiding out in someone else’s room.”
“But you don’t think it’s likely. Damn it. Poor girl.”
“I am calling it in.”
There was a lot more than sympathy between the lines of Valerie’s words. Her case depended greatly on Ariel and her credibility. They needed to find her safe and sound. Everything else was unimaginable.
She was under incredible stress, and to unleash the city’s police force searching for her, was likely to add to that.
Ellie had just gotten off the phone when Ms. Sherman joined them again, shaking her head sadly. “None of the girls has seen her since dinner,” she said.
“I have notified my colleagues. They’ll be on the lookout. We’re also going to search the area, and every corner of the house. We’ll make sure she’s safe.”
* * * *
Jordan caught up with her a few minutes later, joining Ellie on the meticulous search from attic to basement. There was no sign of Ariel. Eventually, they joined the officers outside. The group home was located near a park, with a hiking trail leading up into the woods from there.
“What is on her mind right now?” Ellie asked out loud. “She’s been holding it together except for being a bit disorganized, like most teenagers. Then she hears about Joy Anne—that has to trigger something. She knows the structures in the cult inside out.”
“I am fairly certain that she just wants some peace and quiet. It’s not knowing how she’s going to try to achieve that worries me.”
Jordan’s tone was level, but Ellie couldn’t help thinking of something she had shared another time, of having been in such a dark place that peace and quiet had become urgency.
“We need to find her soon,” she said, not because this was news to Jordan, but because it served as reassurance that they would.
They had almost made it to the beginning of the hiking trail.
Rain had made the ground slippery. Up here, there were still some street lamps, but the light was sparse enough for them to turn on their flashlights. A quick check in with the other search teams revealed no results so far.
There was a pavilion to the left of the hiking trail. Jordan must have head the same thought, because she headed straight in that direction rather than following the trail.
Ellie hurried after her.
Underneath the roof, Ariel sat against one of the pillars, shivering, wearing only a hoodie over jeans and a t-shirt. She didn’t look up when they got closer.
“Hey. Ariel.” Jordan crouched down next to her while Ellie called off the search. “Let’s get you home?”
They both flinched at the word, Ellie noticed. Ariel looked up at them, her expression matter-of-fact even though her face was tear-streaked.
“Everybody’s already fed up with me. And if I testify, they’ll get to me too.”
“That’s definitely not true. Look.” Jordan sat on the ground next to her. “Hearing about Joy Anne must have been terrible for you. I can promise you, no one’s getting to you—no reporters, none of the brothers or people who helped them. We don’t know yet if any member of your family threatened Joy Anne, but that’s why we wanted to take you to a safer place.”
“And we’ll be there too,” Ellie added, hoping she wasn’t promising too much. For sure, the FBI would like to be informed of the proceedings. Maybe Bethany would come, even though she had accepted a promotion recently. It could be a challenge to handle both of Jordan’s exes at the same time, but for Ariel’s sake, she could certainly do it.
For the first time, she saw a bit of a light in the girl’s eyes. “Really?”
“Sure. I’ll have to clear it with my sergeant, but I’m sure he’ll say yes, and so will Jordan’s boss. Ms. Esposito will want to talk to you about your testimony some more, but other than that, we can hide out from everyone and everything until the trial. Have pizza…and you don’t even have to make your bed.”
Ellie stepped closer and sat to Ariel’s right, wincing at the contact with the cold damp floor.
Ariel leaned into her with a tired sigh.
“I wish I could just stay with you.” Over her head, Ellie exchanged a look with Jordan, not at all surprised to see her tear up. Ellie assumed that she might be wondering the same thing. What if they could make it happen?
Chapter Eleven
There was no opportunity to raise the question until later that night, and even then, Ellie hesitated. Ariel had taken a hot shower at the house, apologized to Ms. Sherman, and then packed for the safe house. After conversations with their respective superiors, Ellie and Jordan picked up some clothes for themselves as well, and then they drove Ariel. Valerie Esposito followed.
When she and Jordan sat together in the living room after Esposito had left, Ellie wasn’t sure how to approach the subject. She didn’t want to disappoint Jordan or Ariel, when she had only little knowledge of the proceedings, when she didn’t even know how to feel about the idea.
Could they do it—even think about it? Did they have the resources to care for a child that had survived the traumatic death of her mother, and years in an abusive cult? Most importantly, when Ariel said those words, did she mean it, or were they just showing how overwhelmed and confused she was?
“I wish I could have a drink,” she said instead of all the things that were reverberating in her mind.
Jordan laughed softly. “Me too, but I guess that has to wait until after the trial.” She paused for a moment, then continued, “Have you thought about applying for another job? I hear one of the guys in Vice just asked for a transfer. They have always been short-staffed.”
“Yeah. I don’t know. Maybe.”
“What are you thinking?”
“The same thing you are thinking about?”
Jordan took a deep breath. “Maybe. I’m not sure what we can do about it.”
“Yeah. I know we said maybe for a while now, but have you ever thought about adopting?”
“I have,” Jordan confessed. “I’m just not sure I have enough to offer…Jack and Pauline had a damn tough job, and they were up to it at every turn. I hope Ariel gets to have a family like that. I care about her, and I know you do, too.”
“But?” Ellie prompted.
“I couldn’t stand to be the mother who fails,” Jordan said, getting to her feet. “I wouldn’t want to put that kind of pressure on any child, to right what my birthparents did wrong.”
“What if we got it right? What if we don’t get any more signs?”
“You are serious about this?”
“I am—” Ellie’s answer was interrupted by the ringing of Jordan’s cell phone. She put Derek on speaker.
“Hey, Ellie,” he said. “So there’s good news and…some bizarre stuff. Joy Anne was able to make a statement. She blames the police and the D.A.’s office for trying to influence her against her family, and regarding the bizarre…”
“Oh, that wasn’t it?” Jordan sighed.
“She calls Ariel the spawn of the devil. No love lost there.”
“Nice. You got anything else?”
“Just because she said it, doesn’t mean no one told her to say it.”
“Yeah, I agree. Keep an eye on her, and keep me posted. We’ll see you in court.”
Even before Jordan suggested one of them could turn in for the night, Ellie knew she wouldn’t get a definitive answer from her tonight, but that was okay. They shouldn’t make a decision like that on the spur of a moment—but she felt confident about having raised the question. Ariel shouldn’t live in uncertainty for years to come—and neither should t
hey.
By the morning, neither of them had gotten a lot of sleep, but they had continued their conversation, starting the day with a lot more certainty and determination. Their professional lives had often put them in contact with people who could help out with the details. Now it was up to them to raise the question with Ariel, once the time was right.
First, she had to get through her testimony.
* * * *
“They hate me, don’t they?” Ariel asked over breakfast. “No one has even tried to talk to me.”
“Many of them grew up with the Prophets, or have been with them for a long time,” Jordan eventually told her. She wasn’t surprised the girl’s mood had swung somewhat when it came to her family members. It would take more time to come to terms with the fact they didn’t care for her all that much. It could take decades. “When you are in a bad situation for so long, you can become convinced that it can only get worse.”
“My mom wasn’t like that, though. She believed that we could make it outside.”
“Yes, and I have no doubt you will. Others might change their mind eventually when they realize they are free.”
“Are they, really?” Ariel looked doubtful. “Are you sure all of them will be convicted?”
The bust at the Prophets of Better Days compound had been the largest, in this context, Jordan had seen in her career. Yes, she wished all of the abusers could go away for a long time.
“Most of them,” she said.
Ariel nodded, as if she’d already come to that conclusion by herself. “Do I have to stay at the home until I’m eighteen?”
That question hit too close to home at this time of the morning. A few months ago, she had promised Ellie that they would start thinking about children once her career was taking off. Ellie had been incredibly patient when it came to Jordan’s reservations about moving in together, and now, she was thinking about sharing a house, getting married and adopting a teenager? This was going so fast it was making her head spin—but maybe life wouldn’t always wait for her to catch up, even if Ellie did.
“Not if you get adopted. Your father waived his parental rights, so there’s nothing in the way.”
“I guess that’s one good thing he did,” Ariel said darkly. A pause ensued in which she apparently remembered what she’d said yesterday. “I know you’re trying to help me, and I’m really grateful. I’m sorry I ran away, and what I said yesterday—I know you don’t really have the time to always have me around. Not that I can’t take care of myself, but…You know.”
Ellie poured some more tea into Ariel’s cup before she got up to get the coffee pot for Jordan and herself.
“The thing is, we’d love to have you around, but it’s something you have to decide too. Actually, we are buying a house…and once this is all over, if you want, you could come look at it, see if you like it.”
Obviously, a careful approach was out of the window now. Ariel’s eyes widened at the implications set in, hope warring with disbelief. Jordan remembered her first day with Jack and Pauline very well, fearing every minute that it could be only a dream.
“I’m sure the house is fine,” Ariel said. “I like you…and I know the Prophets taught us that homosexuality is a sin and from the devil, but Mom always said that was a load of bullshi—crap.”
“Ariel.” Jordan couldn’t help it. If they were going to be parents, shouldn’t they start right here?
Ellie laughed. “She’s totally right. Prejudice does stink.”
Ariel looked happy and excited, but while Jordan was still processing the past few seconds, her mood changed abruptly.
“Okay, right, that sounds nice, now let’s forget about it. I’m so sorry. It was stupid of me. Why would you even care when my Dad wants nothing to do with me?”
“Because sometimes family has nothing to do with being related by blood,” Ellie said. “I have friends who were disowned and kicked out by their parents, and they met kinder and more open-minded people whom they call family. I know they taught you a very different idea of family, but you already know that’s not all there is. And when parents fail, it’s okay to call them out on it, hold them accountable. If your Dad doesn’t care, that says everything about him, and nothing about you.”
“There’s paperwork involved,” Jordan added, determined not to make this about herself. Ariel needed them now. “Background checks, CPS will visit, and they’ll make sure the circumstances are right for you. It might take a little while, and we’ll probably have to wait until after the trial to get started—but we’ll do our best to make it happen as soon as possible. Once we leave the safe house—if you want, that is.”
“Thank you so much! Yes, I want that.” The next moment, Ariel wrapped her in a tight hug, and Jordan hugged her close in return, aware of every single emotion she’d still have to work on herself. She caught Ellie’s smile. This was the right decision. They’d be all right.
It might not be easy, but when had that ever stopped them?
Ariel needed a safe environment away from the people who had informed her recent years, time to grieve her mother and adjust to the world outside of the compound. They could provide that for her.
If given the chance. But with their record, who would deny it to them?
They stayed up long past what should have been each of their bedtimes, given the fact that Ariel might have to testify the next day, and possibly both of them would have to as well. The story unfolding had taken precedence over everything else.
Valerie was wrong. This had nothing to do with guilt over her own shortcomings. It was a chance to pay it forward that she wouldn’t let pass her by.
* * * *
Jordan and Ellie kept in touch with Derek who sounded angry when he related that two other women had retracted their statements. They didn’t confirm what Joy Anne had said, either, but they didn’t want to go on the record against the Prophets.
They did the best they could to distract Ariel from her upcoming gigantic task, with movies and a couple of card games they taught her. There hadn’t been much play or connection to pop culture on the inside. It was harrowing to think that within a short time, Ariel might have been “married” and the mother of another child trapped in hell.
Ariel went along with all their efforts. Her presence brought up a lot of memories for Jordan, which, put into context, reminded her over and over again how lucky she’d been. She wanted to be the person who sent this young girl on her own lucky path. Failure was not an option.
They watched an episode of a sitcom after dinner, and then, given the process looming, made it an early night.
“Did we make the right decision?” Ellie asked, her words resonating in the dark, coming out of the blue. Jordan had thought she was asleep.
“Yes, I believe so.”
“This is a big deal. We’re in all the way, and…I’m fine with that. It’s maybe not how we planned having a child, but if that’s the way, I’m good. I just want to make sure it’s the same for you.”
“Why wouldn’t it be?”
Ellie turned to her, snuggling close. “It’s a lot happening in a short amount of time. If this is going too fast for you, and I’d understand, I need to know now.”
“What do you mean?” Jordan didn’t like where this conversation was going. There was no room for doubts or a do-over—not that she needed it. Not anymore. She hoped Ellie knew that.
“The house, and now the new plan…You’ll be stuck with me and a teenager for the immediate future. We haven’t lived by ourselves much. I just want you to be sure you’re okay with all that, because it wouldn’t be fair to Ariel if we found out after the fact.”
“What do you think?” Jordan couldn’t help it, the edge that had crept into her tone. She sat up and reached out to turn on the lamp.
“This is the right thing,” she said, keeping her voice deliberately soft. “Ellie. I love you, more than I could ever put into words. This girl has been through hell, and we have something to offer to her. I mig
ht not have been raised in a patriarchal cult, but I know what it’s like to be offered a way out of something bad. I want to do my best to give her that, and I know that together we can. So, if you’re in it, that’s good, because I am too.”
“I love you too,” Ellie whispered. “I wanted to make sure I didn’t push you into any of this.”
“This is exactly what I want.”
It was good to be certain. They needed every bit of certainty going to trial.
The next morning, while Ariel was in the bathroom and Ellie prepared breakfast, Jordan called her parents. Pauline picked up.
“I need to tell you something,” Jordan said without preamble. “You can tell Jack, but aside from that, neither of you can talk to anyone about it yet. Ellie and I are going to—try anyway—to adopt a child.”
There was stunned silence on the other end, before Pauline said, “Jordan, that is amazing, but how…When did you make that decision? I thought you might be…You have to tell me everything. That means you asked Ellie to marry you!”
“No, I didn’t ask Ellie yet,” Jordan hastened to curb her enthusiasm. Before she could remind Pauline not to talk about this subject to anyone either, Ellie came into the bedroom.
“Ask me what?”
“Pauline wanted to know if we’re coming to dinner on the weekend, to tell her everything. She’s looking forward to meeting Ariel.”
“I definitely am,” Pauline said, and Jordan congratulated herself on thinking quickly. She had a brief, spare thought for a dying Jonathan Darby—see how everything in my life is falling into place? You have no more power over any of it.
“I just wanted to let you know. We’ll see you on the weekend, and then we’ll talk about everything, I promise. Bye.” She ended the call, not wanting to get into the subject too deeply with Ellie at this moment.
The bathroom door opened, and Ariel emerged. Her looking apprehensive came as no surprise, but she was determined. They all were.
“Let’s have breakfast,” Jordan said. “We don’t know how long this day is going to be.”
Chapter Twelve
Intentions (Carpenter/Harding Book 6) Page 9