"Hold on." I hurry to my room and close the door. "Okay. Go ahead."
"I'm still waiting for an answer. How'd it go with Luke?"
Before I left college I told Lilly that Luke would be living with us this summer. I also told her I'd kissed him over spring break, which I hadn't told anyone until then.
"So far it's been okay but we haven't really interacted much. We've kind of been avoiding each other."
"Like how?"
"He's been talking to my parents and Cal but hasn't said much to me."
"Isn't that what you wanted? For him to leave you alone?"
"I guess, but it feels weird for him to act like we're not even friends. All those nights we talked on the phone I felt like we were really getting to know each other."
"But then you told him to stop calling. You told him things had to end between you two. That's why he's acting this way. He's doing what you told him."
"I know, but it still seems weird. I don't want to feel awkward every time I'm around him."
"Then talk to him. Tell him you can be friends."
"After telling him we couldn't?"
"You didn't say he couldn't be your friend. You just told him you couldn't date him."
"Yeah, but by telling him to stop calling me I feel like I ruined our friendship."
"Then get it back. There's no reason you guys can't be friends. You both love golf. You get along really well."
"And we're attracted to each other, which makes it hard to be friends. And impossible to live together without something happening." I sigh and flop down on my bed. "What am I going to do, Lilly? How am I going to survive the summer?"
"I think you should go along with whatever happens and stop fighting it."
"I can't. My dad told Luke he can't live here if he even shows interest in me. If my dad found us doing anything, even just holding hands, he'd kick Luke out of the house. If that happens, Luke has nowhere to go."
"That explains why he was ignoring you when they picked you up at school."
"And why he's continued to ignore me. So I guess I don't need to worry about this. My dad scared Luke so bad he'll never try to date me. I bet he won't even try to flirt with me."
"You sound sad about that."
"I am. I know it's wrong but I really like Luke. I think there could've been something between us."
"Maybe there still could, once Luke gets his own place. And for the record, being with him isn't wrong. Just because your family doesn't think you should be with him doesn't mean it's true. Look at Reed and me. My mom hates Reed but we're still together."
"Even if I tried dating him it can't happen this summer. I don't want Luke to be homeless because of me."
"Then just be friends for the summer and be more than that once he moves out."
"Being just friends is going to be hard. When we're together it's like there's this chemistry between us that's impossible to ignore. My heart starts going crazy and I swear, it's like I can't breathe."
She laughs. "Are you sure you're not in love?"
"It's not love. It's attraction. An attraction so strong I find it hard to be around him."
"Well, hiding in your room all summer isn't an option so I guess you'll just have to learn how to control yourself. Maybe the more you're around him, the easier it'll get."
"I doubt it. Hiding in my room sounds like the better option."
"Taylor! Dinner!" my mom yells from downstairs. She ordered pizza so she wouldn't have to cook.
"My mom's calling me to dinner. I gotta go."
"Okay. Talk to you later!"
I go in the bathroom and wash my face to wake myself up. Then I fix my ponytail and wonder if I should put makeup on. Normally I wouldn't for dinner with the family but if Luke is there, maybe I should. Actually, it doesn't matter. He's just a friend. A friend can see me with messy hair and no makeup.
When I get to the table Luke isn't there. I'm disappointed, but also relieved because having him here would make me nervous. I keep thinking my family's going to pick up on the fact that I like him. I'm trying really hard to hide it but sometimes I can't control how my body reacts, like when my heart takes off and makes me breathless.
"Where's Luke?" my mom asks Cal.
"He's skipping dinner. He's wiped out."
"He hasn't heard from that woman, has he?" my dad asks.
"Albert's daughter?" Cal shakes his head. "Not since the funeral. I doubt he'll answer her calls after that."
Albert, the guy Luke was living with who was basically a dad to him, died a little over a week ago. Cal called and told me before they showed up at my college. When I saw Luke, he looked really sad. I told him I was sorry and asked if he was okay. He said he was but I could tell he wasn't. He still isn't. He's been really quiet and hasn't been eating much.
"What happened at the funeral?" I ask Cal.
"Albert's daughter accused Luke of stealing stuff from the house."
"Luke wouldn't steal. He'd never do that. He's not—" I stop, realizing I shouldn't be making such bold statements about a guy I supposedly barely know.
"He's not what?" Cal asks.
"He's not the type of person who would steal." I reach across Cal and grab a piece of pizza from the box. "I mean, he doesn't seem like he would, but what do I know?"
My family is staring at me but I avoid looking at them. Instead I focus on my pizza, picking off the olives that Cal insists on having whenever we order pizza.
"I can't believe that woman would attack Luke like that at Albert's funeral," my mom says, sounding angry. "How did she even know things were missing? Did she do an inventory of the house before her father died? I thought she never even went to visit him."
"She didn't," Cal says. "But she knew Albert had her mom's jewelry and she couldn't find it."
"Does Luke know where it is?" my mom asks.
"He said it's probably hidden in a box. He said Albert was always hiding stuff in boxes and then forgetting where he put them. I'm sure the jewelry's in the house somewhere. Sandra's just too lazy to look for it. That's probably why she accused Luke of stealing it. He'd have to find it if he wanted to prove her wrong."
"What did Luke tell her when she accused him?" my dad asks Cal.
"Nothing. He just tried to ignore her. He's still really upset about losing Albert but he won't talk to me. I think he needs more time."
My mom shakes her head. "I feel so bad for him. Losing Albert. Losing his home. His parents not even caring what happens to him."
I keep quiet until the conversation switches from Luke to golfing.
"When do I meet with the new coach?" I ask my dad.
"Tomorrow at noon, but it won't be a lesson. You'll just be meeting him and he'll go over any questions he has about your injury."
A couple years ago I twisted my knee and heard something snap. My knee hasn't been the same since. The doctor had me wear a brace for a few months but it didn't really help. They considered surgery but said it probably wouldn't do much. It still hurts sometimes and gets stiff, which affects my golf swing.
"I also signed you up with a conditioning coach like Cal has."
"You did?" I look at my dad, confused, because he's always said I didn't need another coach until I was out of college and trying to go pro.
"It'll be good for your game," he says. "May help improve your score."
"I'm going to the gym," Cal says, getting up from the table.
My mom stands up and starts combining the leftover pizza slices into one box. "Taylor, would you take a few pieces out to Luke?"
I gulp down the water I just drank. "I thought he was sleeping."
"I'm sure he's not sleeping. It's only seven. He's probably out there watching TV." She hands me the pizza box. "Go take this to him. See if he wants any."
"He doesn't want us bothering him. Why don't you just leave it in the fridge? If he gets hungry he'll find it."
"Taylor, just go offer it to him," my dad says, getting annoyed I'm not doing wha
t my mom said. He's strict about stuff like that. He doesn't like Cal or me arguing with him or my mom when they ask us to do stuff.
"Fine." I get up and take the pizza box from my mom, then go in the kitchen and grab a bottle of soda. I go out back and walk around the pool to the guest house. My hands are full so I have to use my elbow to push the doorbell.
"Cal?" I hear Luke say.
"No. It's Taylor." I look around as I wait, noticing an empty soda bottle sticking out of a bush next to the guest house. Luke wouldn't have put it there. I bet it was the guy who cleans the pool. I don't want my parents finding it and thinking Luke did it so I reach down to grab it but then the pizza box slips and in my attempt to catch it I fall flat on my ass, the box landing on my lap.
"Taylor?"
I look up and see Luke standing there, wearing black basketball shorts and a white t-shirt, smiling at me with those dimples showing.
"Did I take too long to answer the door?" he asks, trying not to laugh.
"What?" I notice the ground next to me. "Oh. No, I was just trying to pick up some trash from the bushes but my hands were full and I fell." I hold up the pizza box. "But I saved the pizza! Here. This is for you."
He takes the box. "Thanks."
I stand up and hand him the bottle of soda. "This is yours too but you might want to wait a minute before opening it. I shook it up when I fell."
"Got it." He nods to the guest house. "You want to come in?"
"Oh, um, I don't want to bother you. I'm sure you're tired from the trip."
"Not really. And honestly, I could use some company right now. Otherwise I'm just sitting in there thinking about..." He stops before saying Albert's name. "I'd just rather not be alone right now."
"Of course. I totally understand. Just let me get rid of this." I grab the empty bottle from the bushes and toss it in the trash container next to the pool. I turn back to find Luke watching me. "I didn't want you getting blamed for making a mess."
"Yeah, I've been accused enough this week for things I didn't do."
I follow him inside the guest house. "I heard about that. I'm sorry. That woman sounds horrible."
"She is." He sits on the couch and sets the pizza box on the coffee table. "I don't know how she turned out that way. Albert's nothing like that." He opens the pizza box and takes out a slice.
"Sometimes it doesn't matter what your parents are like. You can still turn out totally different. Like you and your parents. You're nothing like them."
"True." He leans back on the couch, holding his pizza. "You know, I didn't even think about that until you said it. I kept wondering how it was possible Albert's kids turned out so much different than him but like you said, I'm nothing like my parents." He smiles. "You're really smart." He takes a bite of his pizza.
"Well, I am in college," I kid. "They teach you stuff there."
He laughs. "Not me. I practically flunked out."
"Because it's not what you wanted to do. If you were interested in your classes you would've done fine."
"I doubt it. I'm not smart when it comes to book stuff. I've never been good at school. But I kick ass at golf so at least I have that."
"You think you'll go pro this year?"
"Probably not. I don't have the money. The tournament fees alone are more than I can afford. I can barely pay my coach. And now I have to save up money for a place to live. I'm going to have to get a job and put off going pro until I can afford to compete again."
I feel bad for him. Losing Albert was hard enough but now he might lose his chance to play professionally. It's really expensive to play in tournaments, even smaller tournaments, and then you have travel expenses. Someone like Luke can't afford all that. Most people can't, which is why it's so hard to make golf a career.
"But don't you have a deal with WaveField?" I ask. "My friend, Lilly, said her brother's putting you in some commercials."
"Just one, and it may not even happen. When I signed the contract it was assuming I'd be golfing professionally by now. I can't work for them as an amateur."
"You could still do a commercial for them. Do it for something other than golf, like maybe fitness equipment. Have you asked Garret about that?"
"No, but I will. Cal had the same suggestion."
"I bet Garret would agree to it. He really wants to work with you. He might even sponsor you once you go pro."
"He mentioned that when we first talked but now that I might have to take some time off from golf I'm not sure what that'll mean for the sponsorship."
"Just start with the commercial and see how it goes. I have a feeling it'll lead to more."
He smiles. "You going to sit down?"
Realizing I've been standing this whole time I sit down in the chair next to the couch. It's a wicker chair and I've never liked it. It's really uncomfortable but I can't sit by Luke on the couch. It's a small couch and being that close to him would be trouble.
"So how was the rest of the school year?" he asks.
"Good." I look at him. He's not the Luke I'm used to. That Luke was always smiling and joking around. The Luke I'm seeing now seems really sad, even though he's doing his best to hide it. It hurts me to see him this way.
"How'd you do in your classes?" he asks, taking another slice of pizza.
"Luke."
"Yeah?"
"You can talk to me."
He lets out a laugh. "Isn't that what we're doing? Talking?"
"I mean, you can talk to me about what's going on with you. How you feel after losing Albert. I know we're not that close and maybe you'd rather talk to my brother, but if you want to talk to me, you can."
He sets the pizza down. "I'd rather talk to you. Strange as it sounds I feel closer to you than to him. Maybe because Cal and I don't talk about stuff like this. But you and I did. Those weeks we were talking on the phone I told you stuff I haven't told many people."
I remember those conversations. He told me about his parents and how they treated him growing up and how Albert and golf were the only good things in his life.
"Why'd you tell me that stuff?" I ask. "Why me and not someone else?"
He shrugs. "I guess I find you easy to talk to."
Or is it because there's something between us we're not willing to admit? Something that goes beyond just attraction?
"So talk to me." I adjust myself in the chair.
"You should move. That chair sucks."
I laugh. "You're right. It does suck. My mom was going for a tropical look out here in the guest house but it didn't come out very well, especially with these wicker chairs."
"Is that why she has pineapples everywhere?" he asks, referring to the ceramic pineapple on the coffee table, the pineapple lamps, and the pineapple painting behind his head. "To go with the theme?"
"That, and because pineapples are supposed to be a sign of welcome. Since this is the guest house she wanted people to feel welcomed."
"I don't think many people know that about pineapples. I didn't know until you told me just now."
"Then I guess people will just think it goes with the tropical theme. The bedroom is supposed to be an ocean theme. Did you notice all the seashells in there?"
"Yeah. They're everywhere. She even has seashell soap in the bathroom."
"Once she decides on a theme she goes a little crazy." I move around, trying to get comfortable in the chair.
Luke taps the cushion next to him. "Come over here. The couch is better."
I get up, and while crossing in front of him I trip over his legs, my body crashing down on him and falling face first into the cushion.
"Taylor, are you okay?"
"Yeah."
Completely embarrassed I hurry to get up, then quickly sit down on the opposite side of the couch, which is less than a foot from Luke because the couch is so small.
"I'm really sorry," I say, laughing at myself. "I'm a klutz sometimes. Did I hurt you?"
He chuckles. "No. I'm pretty indestructible. Something knocks me
down I just get right back up."
It's true. He's had so many setbacks in life and yet he hasn't let them get him down. Until now.
"So about what I was saying earlier." I turn to face him. "You can talk to me. About Albert."
He doesn't say anything. I guess that means he doesn't want to talk. I was hoping he would open up to me like he did all those weeks we talked on the phone. I wish things could be like they were back then. I miss that Luke. I miss the flirting and the joking around and the way our talks would get more serious as the night went on.
I miss all that but it's too late to go back. Things have changed now.
Chapter Eleven
Luke
I want to talk to Taylor but don't know if I should. Opening up to her will make me feel closer to her and make it harder to keep my distance from her. I've done a good job of that so far. When we picked her up at college I wanted to give her a hug, but instead I just told her hi then looked at my phone as if seeing her wasn't a big deal. But it was a huge deal. Seeing her again brought back all the feelings I've been trying to push away since the day she told me to stop calling.
Then later, when we were all golfing, her ball went in the trees and I was tempted to hit my ball the same way so we'd have to go find them together like we did last March. But I didn't let it happen because I knew it was a bad idea. Her dad made it crystal clear that I am not to date his daughter or even show interest in her that way. If I do, I'm no longer allowed to live here. I'll be homeless. So I can't get involved with Taylor, at least not while I'm staying in the guest house. But I still want to be friends with her. I miss the talks we used to have. She's the only person besides Albert that I've ever felt I could open up to.
"Albert was the greatest man I've ever met," I say. "The kindest. The most generous. I wouldn't be where I'm at today if it weren't for him. He made me who I am."
"I wish I could've met him."
"I wish you could've too. He was a good person and a really good golfer. His game started to suffer when his arthritis got bad but he still beat out other guys his age."
"How long did you know him?"
Anyone But Her Page 10