“We’ll page him.”
Jake gave out the phone number, then carried the portable phone upstairs to Joanie’s room. June followed.
“The doctor will call back as soon as possible,” Jake said when he entered the nursery.
Joanie started to fuss, but not with much vigor. “She’s so listless, Jake.”
“Here let me take her for a while.” Jake picked up Joanie and placed her against his chest. He began to murmur the soothing words that usually put his daughter to sleep.
All three kept vigil until the doctor called back. After Ali repeated Joanie’s symptoms, Dr. Hall told them to bring the baby to the emergency room.
Ali set down the phone. “The doctor wants us to go to the hospital.” A look of terror crossed Ali’s face.
Gran June soothed her. “It’s a precaution, Ali. Kids run fevers all the time.” June helped Ali gather things for the diaper bag. Darcie showed up to help as Jake was wrapping Joanie in a heavy blanket and carried her downstairs. Jake and Ali grabbed their coats, and on the way out the door promised to call with any news.
Jake had to fight to keep from speeding, knowing he wanted to get them all to the hospital in one piece. Finally, ten minutes later, he pulled the car to the emergency-room entrance. Once inside the quiet waiting area, they hurried to the desk. Luckily Margo was on duty.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” Ali cried to her friend.
Upon seeing the sick child in Ali’s arms, Margo turned professional. “What’s wrong with Joanie?” She came around the desk.
That was all it took for Ali’s tears to come pouring out. “She’s been running a high fever.”
Margo took her goddaughter and began to remove the blankets. “How’s my precious girl?” the nurse spoke softly, then glanced up at Jake and Ali. “Go fill out the forms,” she said. “I’ll hold the baby.”
Jake escorted Ali back to the desk, where the receptionist handed them three pages of forms. Jake took Ali’s insurance card and passed it on to the woman. “I had Joanie put on my medical insurance at the plant, but it won’t start up until the first of the year,” he explained.
Ali nodded, but he knew she was barely holding it together. He worked on the forms, his own hands shaking as he tried to write. Oh, God, don’t let anything happen to Joanie, he prayed.
Margo approached them. “I’m taking Joanie to the examining room.”
“Not without us,” Jake insisted, tossing the papers to the receptionist. “I’ll finish these later.”
“But, sir—” the girl began.
“No, not now,” he interrupted. “I’ll pay cash if need be.” He tossed his checkbook on the counter. “Or, if that’s not enough, call my father, Cliff Hawkins. I think he helped build a wing or two in this place. If that isn’t enough, too bad. You’re not keeping us from our daughter.” He took Ali’s hand, and together they went back to the examining area.
By the time they found Joanie’s cubicle, Dr. Hall had arrived and was listening to the child’s heart and lungs. Handing the baby back to the nurse, the fifty-year-old doctor pulled the stethoscope from his ears, and faced Ali and Jake.
“Her temperature is up to 105. We’re going to draw some blood. Maybe that will tell us more about Joanie’s infection.”
“Oh, gosh,” Ali gasped. “It’s really serious?”
The doctor raised a calming hand. “A high fever in a child is always a concern, especially since the cool baths and Tylenol couldn’t bring it down. But we have many ways to fight these things. We’re not going to let anything happen to her.” He looked at Jake. “I take it you’re Joanie’s father.”
Jake swallowed hard. “Yes, I am.”
“Good. I want you to assure Ali that everything is going to be all right.”
Just then Joanie let out a squeal as the nurse drew blood from her small body. Ali rushed to her child’s side. Tears welled in Jake’s eyes. He felt so damn helpless. His little girl was sick, and all he could do was stand around unable to help her.
Ali scooped up Joanie and held her in her arms until the baby’s crying subsided. When Joanie calmed down, Ali carefully diapered her, then put her in the tiny hospital gown that Margo gave her.
Thirty minutes later, the blood-test results came back. Joanie had an elevated white count.
“What does that mean?” Jake asked.
The doctor removed his glasses and sighed. “That means we need to do more tests to rule out meningitis. You’ll need to sign a consent for a spinal tap.”
“Oh, God.” Ali cried. “You mean she…she could die?”
The doctor said gently, “It’s a precaution. But the test can tell us more.”
Jake’s hands curled into fists. “So you’re saying all we can do is stand around…and wait?”
“We can watch her, feed her fluids and use cool packs to help keep her fever down so there’s no chance she goes into convulsions.”
Jake put a protective arm around Ali as they glanced down at Joanie. The baby looked flushed and lethargic, but mostly helpless. No! He wasn’t going to let anything happen to his child.
“Ali, come on,” he encouraged. “We need to think positive. Joanie is going to be fine.” He glanced over his shoulder at Margo. “We’ve got the best people in this hospital taking care of her, and her godmother’s here to help. We’re going to pull her through. Remember when you helped me? Well, it’s my turn now to help Joanie. I won’t let anything happen to her. Please believe me.”
Ali nodded, but her lips were trembling. “Oh, Jake. I’m just scared.”
“I know, honey. So am I,” he confessed. “So am I.”
Margo took Joanie from Ali and placed her on the gurney to be moved upstairs into pediatrics where the baby could be monitored more closely. Ali followed and Jake said he’d be there as soon as he called June.
Ali stayed glued to her daughter’s bedside, and watched as she slept. Margo had just given Joanie a cool sponge bath to help with the fever. Joanie cried the whole time. Finally when the ordeal was finished, Ali got to rock her baby. But all too soon, they wanted Joanie back in the bed. Ali stood by the side rail and held on to her daughter’s hand, soothing her with quiet words until she fell asleep.
Jake took over for a while so Ali could go and freshen up with some things that Gran June and Darcie had brought over.
Gallons of coffee kept his blood surging through his tired body. He prayed as he sat next to his daughter’s bed, promising God anything and everything if He would just get Joanie through this.
He looked down at her small fragile body lying still in the bed, and the sight brought a new set of tears to his eyes. He loved Joanie so much. This precious child had given him a reason to live a few months ago. He glanced down at the tiny fingers tucked into his so trustingly. He was supposed to protect her.
“Oh, God. Please, let my daughter live. I love her so much.”
When he opened his eyes, he saw his father standing in the doorway. Suddenly anger pulsed through him. Jake got up from his daughter’s bed and walked out into the hall.
“June called me. How is Joanie doing?” Cliff asked.
“Suddenly you’re here to show concern?” Jake said. “How touching. Since when did you have time for family?”
Cliff started to speak, then stopped. The color drained from his face.
“You’ve never had time to play father,” Jake went on. “Now you want to play grandfather. I don’t think so. I don’t want Joanie to think she can count on you. You’re not going to disappoint her the way you—” Jake broke off and drew a deep breath. “Why don’t you just go back to the plant? Just leave me and my family alone.” He turned around and discovered Ali standing behind him. She had a shocked look on her face. He ignored it, and went back to Joanie’s bedside.
Ali stood in the hall, embarrassed and ashamed over Jake’s behavior. How could he talk to his father that way? She walked up to Cliff. “Cliff, he’s just upset. We’re all going crazy—”
&nbs
p; Cliff raised a hand. “You don’t have to apologize for my son. The worst part is that he has every right to hate me. I wasn’t there for him when he needed a father.” Cliff frowned, looking much older than his years. “But I’d hoped that after his accident, we’d be able to work through the past and start over.” He sighed. “Tell Jake that if he needs anything, I’ll be at home.” He started to walk away, then stopped. “And, Ali, tell Jake I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.” The man turned and went to the elevators.
A few minutes later, Ali returned to her daughter’s room, unable to put the scene between Jake and Cliff out of her mind. How could Jake have said those awful things to his own father? Didn’t he know how much the man loved him? Cliff put in hours at the hospital while Jake was so sick. Now all the man wanted to do was help his son get through this crisis, and Jake rejected him. What was it that made Jake hate his father so much?
Ali came up behind Jake. He turned and their eyes met, then Ali went into his arms. He comforted her, easing her fears. It was nice for a change to have someone to lean on. Jake always seemed to be there for her and Joanie. She hoped he always would be.
As Jake continued to hold her, Ali bargained with God to take care of her child and make her well again. Finally a peaceful calm came over her, and she knew that everything was going to be just fine.
“She’s going to be all right, Jake.”
He pulled back and wiped his eyes. “Of course she is. Joanie’s a fighter.”
“Like her daddy.”
They both looked down at the child in the bed. Even though the fever wasn’t gone yet, Joanie seemed to be sleeping soundly.
Jake drew a shuddering breath. “God, Ali.” He squeezed his eyes shut. “If anything happens to Joanie, I don’t know…”
This was the first time that Jake had showed her his fear. “No, Jake. We have to have faith. I believed that you would come out of your coma, and you did.” She smiled. “Joanie is going to make it through this, too. They’ve already ruled out meningitis.”
Another hour had gone by, and the sun was dawning on a new day. Jake sat in a chair beside the bed, his head braced against his hands. Suddenly Ali heard their daughter making noises and the sounds, “Da…da…da…” filled the room.
“Oh, my gosh.” Ali shook Jake, then reached out and touched her child’s rosy cheek. “Oh, sweetie, how are you feeling?” She noticed a rash along her daughter’s arms and legs.
Joanie made a cooing sound, then glanced around with her big brown eyes. When she spotted Jake, she smiled. “Da…da.”
Jake smiled back. “That’s right, Joanie. It’s Dada and I love you.” He turned to Ali. “And I love you.”
“I love you, too,” she whispered, her heart so full. She had everything she could ever want.
Jake pulled her into his arms and held her. Ali felt safe and secure for the first time in a long time. Then she looked up and saw Darcie standing in the doorway.
Her sister looked lost, sad. “May I come in?” Darcie asked.
“Sure.” Ali smiled. “Joanie’s fever has broken. She’s going to be all right.”
“I know, I heard,” Darcie said. There was a long hesitation before she spoke again. “I wanted to say goodbye. I’m going back to New York.”
Ali had waited to hear those words for a long time, but they didn’t bring her the satisfaction she’d thought.
Jake stood and placed his arm around Ali, but remained silent.
Darcie lowered her gaze to the child in bed, then looked back at her sister. “I also wanted to say… I was wrong. Anyone can see how much in love you two are. I spent the night in the waiting room, watching how you drew strength from one another, how you reached out unselfishly offering comfort.”
“Our child was sick,” Jake explained.
“It was more than that.” Darcie wiped a tear that trickled down her cheek. “And I’m sorry, Ali, that I ever tried to interfere.”
Ali walked around the bed and took her sister out into the deserted hallway. “I was wrong, too, Darcie. I should have told you about Jake and me a long time ago. I just didn’t know how.”
Darcie nodded in understanding. “It’s past history. You and Jake are together where you belong. I can see what a good mother you are with Joanie. I guess it’s something we didn’t learn from our own.”
“It’s all I ever wanted to be—a wife and mother.”
“I know,” Darcie agreed. “And I spend my life running away from commitment. Hell, I’ve dated a lot of nice guys since coming to New York, but if they get too close, I start backing away.”
Ali’s heart went out to her sister, wishing she could help. “Someday there’s going to be a guy who cares enough that he won’t let you.”
“Easy for you to say—you’ve got a great guy.”
They both laughed. “And I’m not giving him up.”
Darcie hugged Ali, fighting back more tears. “I don’t blame you. You got what you deserved, Ali. And Jake ended up with the right sister.”
The doctor verified that Joanie was on the road to recovery. She had a case of roseola. By the end of the morning, her temperature was back to normal and she was released by early afternoon.
At home, Jake didn’t leave Joanie’s side the entire day, and Ali allowed him to take care of the baby. Finally, at about eight that night, their daughter was asleep for the night. That was when Ali told Jake she wanted to talk to him. She escorted him into her bedroom across the hall, so they could be close to Joanie in case she cried.
As the door closed, Jake pulled Ali into his arms and kissed her. The kiss told her of his desire and need, but Ali had to refrain from getting carried away. There were too many things that needed to be worked out before she could think about the physical side of their relationship.
“Jake, we have to talk.”
“This is the only talking I want to do.”
Ali allowed herself to get lost in the moment as Jake kissed her again. His hands moved over her body, quickly igniting her passion.
“It seems like an eternity since I held you, kissed you.” He nestled her in his arms and began to move against her.
“Jake.” Finally Ali pushed against his chest until he released her and she walked to the other side of the room.
“We need to talk about what happened in the hospital.”
Jake looked puzzled, then embarrassed. “If you mean how I broke down, I didn’t…”
“No, Jake.” She waved her hand. “It’s normal to let go of your emotions during a crisis. I’m talking about what you said to your father.”
He looked embarrassed. “You weren’t supposed to hear that.”
Suddenly Ali was remembering what Darcie had told her yesterday: Jake hated their hometown and he hated his father. A cold chill rushed through her body. She’d seen that for herself, firsthand, last night at the hospital.
“Jake, what’s going on between you and Cliff?”
He ran a hand through his hair. “The same thing that has always been going on. We’ve never gotten along and we never will.”
“Isn’t it about time you and your father tried to work it out?”
“No! That’ll never happen. There’s too much…”
Ali felt her panic building. “Too much what?”
Jake drew a long breath and released it. “I just can’t, so don’t ask me to.”
“Then how can you be happy working for him, living in this town?”
He looked at her, his eyes bleak. “I’ll manage.”
“Jake, we can’t build a life together like that.”
He came to her and placed his hands on her arms. “For the first time, Ali, I’m going to have a family. I can handle anything as long as I have you and Joanie.”
Ali heard the underlying desperation, and it scared her. “For how long, Jake, if you keep this resentment for your dad locked up. How can you work together?”
His gaze avoided hers. “I can handle it.”
“For how long?”
“For long enough. Look, my dad and I have been this way all our lives. We’re never going to have a close relationship.”
“But, Jake, if you don’t get rid of this baggage from your childhood, it could sabotage our marriage.”
“No, Ali. That will never happen.”
Tears formed in her eyes. “It could.”
His dark gaze searched her face, then suddenly he smiled. “I don’t have to keep working at the plant. Ray has been talking to me about running for sheriff next November. I haven’t had a chance to talk to you about it.”
“Do you want to be sheriff?”
He smiled again. “I think I might like it…a lot. What about you? How do you feel about me going into law enforcement?”
“Oh, Jake, you’d be good at whatever you do, but it doesn’t erase the real problem.”
He raked a hand through his hair. “Look, Ali. Let me handle my father.”
“Ignoring him isn’t going to work anymore. The blowup at the hospital should tell you that.”
He marched around the room, visibly upset. “Then after we’re married, we’ll go somewhere else where we don’t have to deal with Cliff Hawkins.”
Ali’s heart tightened. “I can’t, Jake.”
“Why?”
“You know that after my parents divorced, our mother dragged Darcie and me around the country. We didn’t know where we were going, or if we were staying long enough to have a home. Most of the time, the places we lived were so awful….” Ali trembled.
“I’d never do that to you and Joanie. I’ll make a good living.”
“I know you will, Jake. But I can’t survive without my family around. My grandmother isn’t getting any younger.”
“We can stay close by.”
Ali shook her head.
Jake gripped her shoulders. “If you loved me, you’d go.”
She gasped, feeling as if he’d slapped her. “I can’t, Jake. I have to think about Joanie. The day she was born, I promised her that she’d always have a home, and a family. Here.”
“Are you saying that I’m incapable of giving my own daughter a home?”
Baby, Our Baby! Page 20