by Quinn Loftis
Chapter 20
I told Tamsin that I didn’t believe in happily ever after anymore. I believed my heart was broken beyond repair and that anyone this broken could not possibly be happy and, therefore, never have a happy ending. I believed Trik was gone, that he had chosen a life of darkness over me. Turns out I was wrong, not about the happy part, but about Trik. He had chosen me. He saved me, or what was left of me. But I have not chosen him. I can’t. He is not what I crave and what I crave I cannot have. So I can’t choose Trik, and all that is left for me to choose is existence or death. Flip the coin, tails stares back at me. Death it is. ~ Cassie Tate
Trik ducked as a lamp flew past his head. He heard it crash into the wall behind him but he didn’t dare take his eyes off of Cassie. They had been through the attempt at seduction, and bargaining, and now she had moved on to anger.
“If you cared for me at all you would do this for me!” She yelled at him. “You see that I’m hurting, you see what it’s doing to me and yet you do nothing.”
More objects flew at him. Collateral damage, Trik thought.
“Cassie, I do care for you, more than anything and that is why I cannot give you what you want. I love you.” Trik told her for the umpteenth time. And still she raged.
Finally, after more than an hour, she collapsed. Her breathing was labored and he saw her shoulders shake as she wept.
“Trik,” he heard the small voice and felt the pull. Her soul was reaching out to him. It had pushed through the raging addict. He rushed to her side and pulled her to him as he had been longing to do.
“I’m here, beautiful, I’m here.”
“Trik, please.” He thought that she was going to beg again for the Rapture but what she asked for was worse. “Please kill me.”
Trik closed his eyes and fought to keep his own composure. A world without Cassie was not an option and never would be.
“I can’t do that, my love,” Trik smoothed her hair back from her face and kissed her forehead gently.
She looked up into his eyes and he saw his Cassie staring back at him. She was afraid and lost. She didn’t understand who the person was that screamed at him, that threatened him, and she didn’t want to be that person.
“It’s not you, Cassie. It’s the drug.”
He saw her thoughts, uncensored because she was so weak. He saw that she was ashamed and that she didn’t want him to see her this way. She felt like she should have been able to fight Lorsan and keep from drinking the Rapture. She should have been stronger. He saw deep into her soul, the light that still shined there, the hope that was Cassie. The hope gave him strength.
“You never have to feel ashamed with me. You cannot comprehend all of the atrocities I have committed in my long life, and they were my choice. This, Cassie, this was beyond your control. It was not your choice, nor your fault. The fault lies with me and me alone.”
Cassie was shaking her head as tears fell down her face.
“I should have listened to you. I threw a fit like a spoiled child and, oh god,” she groaned at the memory. “I hit you.” She looked up at Trik as horror filled her eyes. “I’ve never hit anyone in my life and I hit the man I love. What kind of person does that?”
“The kind whose heart has been broken. I do not blame you, my love. I should have gone after you. I should have made you listen to me. Of all the times for me to not do what I wanted to, I picked a very stupid one.”
Cassie shook in his arms as the pain continued. She didn’t know how much more she could take. She hurt all over. Breathing felt like work and with every breath she was tempted to just not take the next. She was beginning to sweat again, a cold sweat that chilled her to the bone. As Trik held her, she shivered as her clothes became drenched. Trik pulled back and looked down at her, taking in her appearance. Her lips had a blue tinge to them and she had grown paler.
“You need to be in dry clothes, Cassie.” He stood up and placed her back on the bed. Before he walked away to find something else for her to wear he took her face in his hands and stared into her eyes. “Stay with me.” He pushed power into his voice and reached for the bond that had begun so early on in their meeting. “Fight, Cassie. Let your soul reach for mine and please hold on.”
All she could manage was a single nod. He stared a moment longer and then released her. He was gone and then back in a matter of seconds. He had a towel, a wet cloth, and a large tunic that he laid on the bed.
He took the wet cloth and wiped her forehead and then her neck. She closed her eyes and found some small measure of comfort in his care of her.
“Cassie, I need to change your clothes. Can you look at me?”
She opened her eyes with great effort and met his stare.
“Don’t take your eyes from mine, alright?” She nodded her agreement.
Trik undressed her quickly. He used the towel to dry as much of her skin as he could and then he slipped the tunic over her head and helped her get her arms into the sleeves. His eyes never left hers and his hands moved with clinical efficiency. The tunic was much too large for her but that worked out well as it covered her completely.
“Why don’t you lay back and rest,” he told her as he helped her under the blankets. She still shook from the pain that continued to beat at her small body. Finally, mercifully, she passed out.
Trik checked to make sure that she was still breathing and then he sunk down to his knees beside the bed. He took her cold, clammy hand in his and he held it to his lips. He kissed the back of it and then the palm. He leaned his head against her side and closed his eyes.
He was exhausted and for the first time in his long, long memory he was terrified. Not scared, not worried, the feeling went beyond those small emotions. The King of the Elves, the greatest assassin his people had ever known, was utterly and completely terrified. He felt a tear slide down his cheek and he didn’t care that maybe it made him weak to cry. He had been holding on by a thin strand, wanting to give Cassie strength. But now, as she lay still before him, her body thin and the luster gone from her young skin, he let go.
He wept. Despair shrouded him and he pulled the familiar darkness around him like a comforting blanket. His shoulders shook, and he didn’t attempt to choke back the sobs.
“I petitioned you once long ago,” he spoke into the quiet room, as he swallowed hard against the pain. “I came before you then, weary of the world I lived in, worn out from the constant battle of light and dark, good and evil. I walked away. You told me the consequences of my actions and told me my fate, but you did not tell me this.” His jaw tensed as he continued to speak. “You did not tell me that I would find her only to lose her. Is this my punishment and, if so, why her? She is an innocent, young with so much life to live, why take that from her to punish me?”
Trik felt them before he saw them. The Forest Lords stepped into his cabin and filled the space until it felt barely large enough to stand in.
“You are needed by your people. You have a duty to them, and to the human race. You have been given great power, Triktapic. That power brings great responsibility. Even now Light King and his warriors and the humans give of themselves to save many. So too must other sacrifices be made for the greater good.”
“Not HER!” His voice filled the room as he stood from his kneeling position. “Her life is not comprisable. I offer mine for hers. I am not so unique that you can’t find another worthy to lead. Please, let me take her place. Let her live. Let her find love and happiness and give hope as she so freely does.”
“You are willing to die right there where you stand to spare her?”
“There is nothing that I am not willing to do for her. Nothing.” Trik waited and held his breath for their decision.
“Would you live for her, if she were to pass from this world to the next? Would you stay and do what you must?”
Trik wanted to shout at the top of his lungs, that ‘no, he would not live, he would not go on in a world without his beloved.’ But he knew that Ca
ssie would not want that, would expect more from him. Could he live without her? No, he couldn’t. But he could exist to fulfill his duty and then, once his people were safe and the humans were safe, then he would join her.
“I would do what was needed,” he told them honestly.
“So be it.” The words shuddered ominously in the small cabin as Trik watched the Forest Lords vanish.
He was in shock. He couldn’t move though he wanted to lunge after them. They were going to take her from him. After all he had said, all he had begged for, they were going to let her die. He turned to look down at her and then sat beside her. He stared at her face, the face he had fallen in love with the moment he saw her come running into that conference room. He smiled at the memory of her brief moment of relief, only to watch her face morph into shock at the sight of him, then curiosity and attraction and stubbornness. His stubborn mate, with a soul more beautiful than he could fathom.
He leaned forward and laid his head on her chest, feeling it rise and fall and listening to her weak heartbeat. He held his breath, waiting for the moment when she would breathe her last and her heart give way to the abuse her body had taken from the drug.
Minutes ticked by and still she breathed. And then there were fingers in his hair. His head jerked up and his eyes met clear, bright, un-dilated green eyes. His hand reached up to her face and traced her pink skin, no longer pale and sweaty. She was warm to his touch, warm and healthy.
“Trik,” she said his name and it was with a strong voice. “Why are you crying?”
Trik hadn’t even realized he was and he didn’t care. She was alive! She was breathing and healthy and here with him.
“Are you in pain?” He asked her nervously.
She shook her head. “I feel fine.” Cassie’s brow furrowed as she wiped his cheeks. “What happened? Why am I no longer writhing in pain, begging for you to end it?”
Trik pulled her up into his arms. “The Forest Lords, they spared you.”
Cassie let out a deep breath and wrapped her arms around him. “Tell them thank you for me.”
“I have a feeling that you will have the chance to tell them yourself, love.”
She pulled back and looked at him and without warning, she kissed him. Trik didn’t move at first but when the surprise wore off, he took over.
“I’m sorry,” she told him in between kisses. “I’m so sorry.”
“Stop saying that Cassie or I’m going to stop.”
“If you stop kissing me, Trik, then you have a death wish.”
He chuckled as he laid her down on the bed. His body covered hers as he whispered words of love to her and then showed her just how much he meant them.
It wasn’t until much, much later that Cassie pulled her lips from his and came up for air. She sat up suddenly and Trik followed her movement.
“What’s wrong, beautiful? Are you hurting again?”
Cassie shook her head. “Trik, where is Elora? Where are Tamsin and Syndra?”
Trik looked away from her eyes as he berated himself for not mentioning it earlier. “They’re volunteering for the greater good.”
“Volunteering?” Cassie’s eyes narrowed. “Where? At the Goodwill?”
“Picture a little less second hand clothes and a lot more danger and mayhem.”
“My best friend has been fighting for her life while we laid here making out?”
“It seemed like a really, really good idea at the time.”
Cassie growled her frustration at him. She jumped up from the bed and headed straight for the mirror.
“Where are you going my love?” Trik asked, still sitting on the bed, in all his shirtless glory.
“We have to help them, Trik. You’re a king; surely you have some sort of kingly powers.”
He nodded and stood, unfolding his body slowly, knowing that she would be watching. She rolled her eyes at him impatiently.
“Cassie, love,” Trik purred her name and she wanted to kick herself for the warmth it flooded her body with.
“What Trik?” She snapped.
“I know you want to help them, and so do I.”
“Good, let’s go,” she interrupted and once again turned and headed for the mirror.
“I want to help them,” Trik continued. “And as effective at distracting the enemy might be with you marching into battle in absolutely nothing but a thin, pale, tunic, I would much prefer my eyes be the only ones who see you in such splendor.”
Cassie looked down at her bare legs, and as she felt Trik’s eyes roaming over her, she realized just how unclothed she was.
“I totally knew that I needed clothes.”
“Of course you did, love.”
“It’s not like I would have just ran headlong into a battle with my butt on full display.”
“I didn’t doubt you for a second.”
“You are never going to let me live this down are you?”
“Not in this life or the next.”
“Will you at least please get me some clothes so that I can rescue my friends and kick Lorsan in the head?”
“I will do better than that beautiful. I will get you some clothes, a sword, and your very own assassin to join you on your quest.”
“Oooh, just what I’ve always wanted. A man whose job title had the word ass in it not once, but two times.”
Trik tossed her some clothes as he muttered under his breath.
Once she was dressed Trik took her hand and led her to the mirror. He looked down at the ring still on her finger, the ring he had given her and smiled. “You kept it.”
Cassie frowned. “Of course I kept it.”
“Because you love me,” he grinned triumphantly.
She held her hand up with her forefinger and thumb separated slightly. “Just a little.”
This time he rolled his eyes at her. “Whatever, you are totally in love with me.”
He heard her snort as she turned and stepped through the mirror and he used his mind to push her where she needed to go. He was right behind her. When they emerged in the light elf castle Trik wrapped an arm around Cassie and pulled her close. His face lost its playfulness as he looked into her eyes.
“You are not allowed to get yourself killed,” he told her sternly.
She let out an exasperated breath but a smile played on her lips and her eyes, so bright and full of life, sparkled. “I’m getting orders from the guy whose job title is essentially ass squared. How seriously am I supposed to take that?”
Trik growled at her and pulled her into a firm kiss. She pulled back, breathless. Even under the circumstances she wanted to shout from the highest mountain the joy that she felt in her heart.
“No worries, love,” she winked at him. “I can’t die. Then who would remind you that you’re too cocky for your own good?”
“You’re right; I have nothing to worry about. You would never allow me to live in such ignorant bliss, nor rob me of the opportunity to spend eternity being called ass squared.”
Cassie laughed for the first time in a very long, dark time. “Damn straight,” she murmured just as she saw Syndra come around the corner.
The Light Elf Queen stopped and put her hands on her hips. She narrowed her eyes and met Cassie’s.
“Took you long enough.”
Cassie shook her head at the snarky she-elf. “I do apologize, your majesty, for not getting over the whole dying from adrug addiction thing a little more quickly.”
“I’ll think about accepting your apology. In the meantime, get your butts in gear. We have friends to rescue, an enemy to crush, and the human population to save.”
“Oh, is that all?” Cassie retorted nonchalantly.
“Piece of cake, babe. Piece. Of. Cake.”
“I’m going to tell you where you can shove that piece of cake if you don’t get a move on,” Syndra growled over her shoulder.
“Take notes my love,” Trik pointed at Syndra’s retreating form. “That is why she is Queen.”
“I heard that,” Syndra yelled.
Cassie gave Trik a high five. “You’re well on your way, beautiful,” he told her with a wink.
From Quinn:
Thank you so much for taking your time to read Elfin, Book 1 in my new series. I hope that it met your expectations and maybe even exceeded them.
Books by Author Quinn Loftis:
The Grey Wolves Series
Prince of Wolves
Blood Rites
Just One Drop
Out of the Dark
Beyond the Veil
The Elfin Series
Elfin
Now check out this sneak peak of Tiffany King’s Jordyn
Sneak Peak Tiffany King
Jordyn
A Daemon Hunter Novel
Book One
By Tiffany King
www.authortiffanyjking.blogspot.com