“They ensure our peace,” he said.
“If you have to have an army to constantly guard your peace, you don’t really have peace,” I pointed out.
“No one threatens me here. No one chases me. I can live without fear. So can others…look here.”
He gestured me inside. I passed through the circular room into another room. The second room mirrored my house in design and the feeling of warmth. My eyes were instantly drawn to the far corner, where Ellen and Sam were sitting in chairs by the fire. They laughed and flirted, totally at ease in their environment. Ellen spotted me next to the door and her brown eyes lit with excited love.
“Clare!” she said in her perfect voice. “You’re here!” She rushed over and pulled me into her arms. “I’ve missed you so much!”
“I…I missed you, too, Mom,” I said, feeling confused.
“It’s good to see ya,” Sam said, getting up from his chair and giving me a brief one-armed hug. “We were worried…”
“Alex! Clare is here!” Ellen called.
Alex stepped out from another room I hadn’t noticed. Her round face was full of sisterly love. “There you are. What took you so long?” she demanded.
“Thanks a lot!” I laughed.
She laughed at me and gave me a fierce hug. “Everything will be okay now. I promise.”
“Do you see?” the yellow-eyed man asked. “Everything you love is here. Safe. I promise you they will stay safe forever. You will never have to worry again.”
Everything I loved? No…that wasn’t true. Something was missing. I struggled with the feeling; something dark fought against the realization my brain was trying to make. It dawned on me in a flash of understanding. Where was Daniel?
I backed away from the glowing scene in front of me. I wanted to stay, to be a part of that warmth forever, but I couldn’t. There was no warmth, unless Daniel was there.
The man followed me as I retreated to the main room of the circle tower.
“Clare…think about what you’re doing. Stay. Be with your family forever,” he urged.
I ignored him. I couldn’t pinpoint the exact cause of the uneasy feeling in my gut, but I knew if I kept looking at Ellen, I would stay. I would stay without a second thought.
Without realizing it, I backed out on to the deck overlooking the desert.
“Nothing is forever,” I told the man.
His yellow eyes lit with a burning fire of desire. “I’m working on forever. I’ve almost broken the secret. You can help. You can help your family live forever.”
The thought of not losing my family was extremely appealing. I wanted it more than anything. How long had I feared being alone, because of the curse of my existence? How long had I feared losing Ellen to the simple, relentless march of time?
I teetered on the edge. I rocked on to the balls of my feet, prepared to take that first step forward; that step toward forever. There would be no outliving the people I loved by centuries. There would be no regret when they were gone. Before I could make that choice, another voice interrupted me. It was not the sort of voice I could easily forget. Though it was full of anger and pain, I knew it in an instant.
“Let me out of here!” Daniel commanded.
Another vision overrode the one of the yellow-eyed man.
Daniel was stuck in a silver room, though there were no chains on the walls. His eyes were full of darkness, his anger obvious. He pounded on a heavy door; his strength was formidable, but it was not enough to bend the door to his will. No one answered his yells.
Annoyed, he turned away from the door and took to pacing. As he paced, I sensed something was wrong, beyond his unaccustomed anger. Between steps, he started shaking. It racked his whole body. The shaking grew worse, and he dropped to the ground. The memory of the yellow-eyed man was wiped from my mind as quickly as the time for Daniel to fall down.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
He didn’t seem to register I was in the room with him, or that I had spoken. His body kept convulsing; his eyes rolled back in his head.
“Daniel?!” I yelled.
I rushed over to him and touched him on the shoulder, eager to take away the pain. He didn’t seem to register the touch, but his lips started to move silently. I thought I saw them form my name.
I sat next to him and cradled his head in my lap. Again, he didn’t respond to my touch. He just kept convulsing. Sweat started pouring down his face, and he clenched his teeth. Clenching his teeth didn’t help take away the pain. He cried out in pain, the cry turning into a low growl, as he fought against the pain channeling through his body.
As I did my best to give him comfort, another figure appeared in the room. One moment he wasn’t there, the next he was. I looked up at him, wondering if he could help me with Daniel, and recognized him. I had seen him once on the streets of New Orleans. He was a hobo, who Alex and I had met in our search for Daniel. He had helped us. It was strange to see him in my dreams, but I accepted his strange appearance easily after such a whirlwind of dreaming.
“Clare…don’t listen to your other dreams. He’s trying to trick you,” he told me.
“Who?” I asked.
“Marcus. Don’t listen to him. Can you do that for me?” he asked.
“Yeah, sure,” I agreed absently as Daniel let out another low growl.
“Good,” he said. The hobo hesitated, stepping closer. “Your necklace, where is it?”
I looked down at my bare neck. “A guy in New Orleans took it from me.”
“Ah, I see…Remember…” he said.
“Don’t listen to Marcus. Got it,” I said.
He smiled in a way that was oddly familiar. The smile gave me comfort. I blinked, and I was left alone with Daniel again. I focused on him, forgetting the hobo in an instant. Daniel’s cries of pain sent shockwaves through my body. Helping him through the pain was more important than the oddity of the man who had just disappeared.
I sat next to Daniel for a long time, long even in dream standards, offering Daniel what comfort I could. The strange dreams that promised forever – the promise of Marcus – did not come again.
I didn’t understand Daniel’s convulsions, or how he had gotten locked in a room so similar to mine. It was better than dreaming he was dead, however, and I allowed myself the comfort of being near him. I stroked his black hair and whispered words of strength to him as he lay curled up in a ball. Once or twice, he looked directly at me, but his eyes told me he didn’t believe what he was seeing. He was lost in whatever madness had found him.
In that dream state, I waited for his pain to pass. A part of me hoped the moment of being with him would last forever; I hoped my dreams would become reality.
For the first time in my life, I feared what waking up would mean.
Chapter 2
When I woke up, I wasn’t sure if it was hours that had passed, or days.
It felt like an eternity.
It was strange to wake up to complete darkness, when my dreams had been so full of color and sound. It was as if my dreams were more real than the reality I was in. I blinked a few times to make sure my eyes weren’t still closed. They weren’t closed – I was simply still locked in the mask of silence.
I took a deep breath to keep from panicking and started to take stock of my body. If everything was working properly, escape was still possible.
My hips and shoulders were hurting from the position the chains forced me in. My neck hurt from holding up the head gear for so long. The only thing that didn’t hurt was my stomach. I had no appetite. I knew it had to be a while since I had eaten, but the feeling simply wasn’t there. Was this the latest addition to my list of talents, or had getting captured stymied my appetite? I felt tired after my vigil over Daniel, the dream not letting me rest the way sleep should make someone feel, but I also felt more alive. I kept the warmth of seeing Daniel in my heart as I readjusted to the present. It was a focus; a reason to escape. I shifted uncomfortably to get rid of the pain in
my hips and arms. All it did was make me more aware of my pain.
I started tugging at my chains, searching for a way to get my hands free. My wrists ached painfully with each tug, but I kept tugging; my hands were my way to freedom. The pain in my wrists changed intensity as I pulled harder against the metal handcuffs. It was the sharp pain of skin tearing away from my body.
“Ow. Ow. Ow,” I said to the black-hole of the mask as I tugged harder, despite the pain.
I wasn’t sure if I had somehow lost weight when I had been lost in dreamland or if the accumulated sweat from the lack of air conditioning was my savior. All I knew was the feeling of hope when I finally managed to free myself. The right hand slipped out of the manacles first, leaving a good portion of my skin behind. I ignored the pain and started forcing my left hand free. After another minute, the left hand slipped out as well.
My hands now free, I started working on the mask. My hands moved to the hinges, and then on to the lock Master Limp had placed to keep it shut. I felt the lock, to see what my options were. It was a smaller lock, not heavy duty. Master Limp probably trusted the chains to keep curious hands away from it. Trusting that the silver chains were a heavier metal than the lock, I found the cuffs again and picked them up. I raised the chains above my head and aimed for the lock.
The first strike was off, hitting the mask with a solid ‘thump!’ My head rang with the strike. The ringing lasted for a long moment. When the sound stopped, I tried again. This time, I hit the lock straight on. It took two more hits, before the lock broke away. I pushed the bolt back through the hole and, gratefully, thankfully, pushed the metal mask off my face. I sucked in a deep breath of air, glad to be free…sort of. I still had the chains around my feet and a locked door to get through.
I started working at the chains around my feet. They were difficult, because of my bulky boots. I couldn’t slip my feet out of the chains, like I had with my wrists. I was still working on them when Master Limp found me.
The door was thrown back, and he appeared in its place. I jumped when I saw him staring down at me. He was surprised, but not for the reason I thought.
“Lost the bet to Mama Dot again. I would have thought you’d go crazy for sure,” he said.
“Sorry…” I said. “I was close, though, if it makes you feel any better. I totally got ‘Sweet Dreams Are Made of This’ by the Eurythmics stuck in my head. But only the chorus. It kept repeating over and over again. Way annoying. You know it?”
“I don’t listen to music,” Master Limp said.
“That’s really quite depressing.”
“How did you get your hands free of the chains?” he demanded, ignoring me.
“Magic,” I said.
“You have a talent that resists the silver?” he asked curiously.
“No. I pulled until there wasn’t resistance. It’s the magic of physics.”
“Are you human?” he asked.
“Aren’t we all?” I asked back.
“Anna brought us a human? She didn’t make mention of that….it changes everything…longer training…different testing methods…I should mention this to Mama Dot….How old are you?”
“Old enough to know you shouldn’t ask a lady that question,” I said.
He slapped me. “Answer a question when it is asked of you,” he demanded.
“Sixteen,” I said, holding my cheek.
“When is your birthday?”
“Halloween.”
“Hm. Well, I will have to take that under consideration. You’ve passed your first test, anyway. Most break within a day. You lasted three.”
Three days? I had been in that thing for three days? Is that how long I had been lost in dreams?
“Today is my favorite day. It’s branding day,” Master Limp added.
“Branding?”
“Oh, I wouldn’t want to spoil the fun. Mama Dot enjoys explaining.”
“Great!” I said, pretending to be excited even though my stomach was in knots.
Master Limp unlocked the chains around my feet. He forced me to stand by grabbing the back of my shirt with his rough hands. I winced as my feet touched the ground; every bone in my body hurt. It was pain beyond anything I had ever experienced. He dragged me out of the silver cell and down the door-lined hallway. He kept a firm grip on my shirt, but refused to touch my skin. Though he knew I was human, he was obviously perplexed by the fact he couldn’t hear my thoughts…or why I was so blasé about my ordeal. It threw him off. He was obviously not used to sarcasm.
My destination was not a happy one.
I was taken to a large room full of cells that were barred, instead of closed off, as mine had been. People were crowded in to the cells. Many had a helpless look in their eyes; others were full of crazed passion. In the center of the room was a chair. Around that chair was a variety of tools and horrible-looking devices I couldn’t figure out the point to. Mama Dot, her hair curled perfectly and her face serene, was at the foot of the chair. I started fighting Master Limp’s touch, as he pulled me inexorably closer to the chair. I wasn’t sure what was happening, but I knew better than to think it would be something pleasant. The chair and the bindings on it were too strong an indicator of the future.
“Don’t be afraid, my dear, we won’t hurt you,” Mama Dot said as Master Limp was forced to kick my legs out, so he could pull me closer to the chair.
“I think we might have differing opinions about the definition of the word ‘hurt,’” I told her, still fighting against Master Limp’s touch.
Master Limp threw me into the heavy-duty chair. Breathing heavily from his attempts to subdue me, he started securing metal restraints over my head, my shoulders, my wrists, my waist, my thighs, and finally my feet. His last act was to take off my boot from my left foot.
“Thank you,” Mama Dot said to Master Limp, once the boot was off.
He nodded and backed away, giving Mama Dot the spotlight. She clasped her hands behind her back and started pacing in front of me. She was careful to stay in my limited range of vision.
“Today is a very important day. Today you will begin your journey in joining our family. You will learn to love Lorian as we love him – as father and provider. You will learn to serve your family and serve them well. You will gladly give your life to the cause, if the cause should need it, and you will learn that the life you have led to this point has been meaningless,” Mama Dot said.
Her words were terrifying. They made me even more determined to rebel. Being hurt was better than giving in to the madness of her words.
“I will not eat any applesauce offered to me if Hale-Bopp passes over,” I said.
“Silence!” Master Limp scolded.
Mama Dot continued speaking with that same serene smile. “Now, you will get a number. It will be your identifier, until you gain access to our family and gain back your name.”
“Identifier?” I asked.
“Mhmm…” She said noncommittally. “Eugene? If you would?”
Master Limp came toward me. With my head strapped down, it was difficult to see him, but I could tell he had something in his hands now; something small and pointy. I strained against the metal strap, as the people around me settled down into a stillness that was eerie. Their stares increased in intensity. I wasn’t sure if it was pleasure or fear that had them watching me so acutely.
Master Limp waited until I caught his eye again, and held up a needle. It was the sort of needle tattoo artists used. It was something I would have normally been all for…had I picked out the design.
“Identifier 73892,” Master Limp said. “This is your new life.”
He lowered the needle to my bare foot and started inscribing those numbers on the center of my foot, near my arch. I clenched my teeth at the pain, but refused to cry out. I struggled to free myself, angry at them for trying to take away my name. Ellen had given me my name. She had said it had come to her in a dream. It was important to her…it was important to me. They had no right to try and era
se that.
As Master Limp worked on my foot, Mama Dot circled me, whispering words of propaganda.
“Lorian is your father…Lorian will protect you…Serve with dignity…Serve with pride…”
I hated her words.
The metal bars binding me in place started to pop and groan in protest as the hate funneled through my body. I wanted to hurt Master Limp; I wanted to wipe that serene look of Mama Dot’s face. I wanted to make those people stop looking at me.
Master Limp finished with his work, my foot burning from where the needle had pierced flesh, but I wasn’t finished. Not by a long shot. The bars buckled as I found rage I had never known before. It was rage I had kept tempered, even the night I had killed the three. It was a rage brought on by pain and anger, instead of fear for Daniel’s life. Master Limp’s smug expression shifted as the bars cracked and fell away. Mama Dot stepped forward, her face alarmed.
“I thought you said it was human?” she asked Master Limp, reaching out to capture me again.
“It is…” Master Limp replied, looking shaken.
I growled at her, literally. It was a deep tearing sound that rattled my brain and tore into my throat. I jumped toward Master Limp, my anger focused on him and the needle he held in his hand. It was the wrong thing to do.
As I leapt at him, Mama Dot reached for me. In a touch I was able to understand her talent. It was agony. Waves of pain, of thousands of years of pain, washed through my body. I saw faces associated with the pain, making it worse. She was a collector of pain – the perfect person for torture. I dropped to the ground as the pain wracked my body. She kept her hand on my arm, forcing me to look; she showed me the penalty for disobeying. It felt like dying.
Mama Dot finally released her hold on me, just as I was thinking it was too much. I lay on the floor, breathing heavily. The echoes of the visions circled my head; pain raced through my veins.
“This one needs the fire taken out of her. Normal methods just won’t work. She’s had other Watchers training her. She knows too much. She needs a hard reprogramming. Seclusion, erasure, surprise… you know the drill. Let me know when she’s ready to start listening…” Mama Dot’s face grew serene again. “I can tell she’ll be a great asset to us. Anna was right.” She waved her hand to where I was debilitated on the floor. “Go on and take her…unless you need help?”
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