Yukon Cowboy

by Debra Clopton

  God had left her high and dry. Alone. Just like Nate had.

  Chapter Five

  Nate stormed through the trees, putting as much distance between him and Bethany as possible. It wasn’t bad enough that he had to be paired with her on this five-day tour, but he had to be paired with two couples who clearly loved each other and weren’t afraid to show it!

  The kissing and hugging, and the blasted sugar was flowing so freely it was enough to drive him crazy. And the look on Bethany’s face—the longing was clearly there. She’d even sighed when Ely gushed all that stuff out just now.

  How was he supposed to keep his mind off thoughts of Bethany—how she’d felt in his arms and how much fun they’d had? He was struggling. He still loved her. That hadn’t changed.

  And he knew it never would.

  But she could not know that. The last thing he needed was for her to know that all he could think about a few minutes ago was kissing her. It had been almost ten years since he’d felt his lips against hers. Frustration ate at him. It had been almost ten years since he’d heard her whisper how much she loved him, and he could still hear her sweet voice, as clear now as then.

  It had been almost ten years since his world had been right and since he’d had every blessing a man could have.

  Almost ten years since God had stopped smiling down on him. Focus man, focus. You have a job to do.

  He did, and he knew it. He would give this group their money’s worth on this tour, and also seek the treasure that might help Treasure Creek get back up on its feet again. That was his job.

  Breathing hard from thrashing through the underbrush, he halted. Shrugging out of his backpack, he set it on the ground, bent on one knee and unzipped the front pocket. He pulled out the folded piece of paper that Amy had given him earlier that morning. It was a copy of the original treasure map.

  The map was misleading in many ways. There were no specifics. It was like trying to find a needle in a haystack. It was going to take everyone searching for the treasure to find it, because the map covered such a huge expanse of wilderness. Even with the tour guides of the Alaska’s Treasures tour company looking for it, locating the spot was going to be tough. There wasn’t any other group of people who were more familiar with the wilderness on the map than them. So far, there hadn’t been much luck, but there had been some unwanted attention that made him worry about the safety of Amy and anyone else who might be in contact with the map. Looking at it, he couldn’t help but wonder if everyone who carried it was being watched? He glanced around through the trees, his gaze quickly noting every detail. There was no one watching him—and there was also no bear or sign that a bear had been around. Calmer, he stood. Night would be here soon. It was time to go back. They had a cabin to reach before that happened.

  He folded the map and placed it inside his backpack. There was nothing about this area that hinted at anything familiar on the map. The cabin three days away was the place he was interested in. He shifted from one boot to the other, and his mind shifted straight back to Bethany and her reason for being here.

  Despite her bluster, he had a feeling she hadn’t hiked in a decade. She’d been too busy. He’d kept up with her through the years and been proud that she’d made her dreams come true. And that was what he didn’t understand. She’d done weddings in Italy, France and other places he’d never had any desire to travel to, but that she’d dreamed of. So why had she come back to Treasure Creek? And how soon would it be before she left again?

  He’d let her go once…he wasn’t sure if he could do it again. Not without at least seeing if she’d have him. But that wasn’t fair to her. Spinning on his boot, he headed back toward camp, feeling about as low as a man could feel. He knew there was no way he’d ever expose his heart or his secret to Bethany. He was going to have to just get over it, and that was that.

  All in all, the first day’s hike took longer than expected, but everyone took some awesome photos. And of course, Lisa and Ely got in a few more kisses before they walked into the camp clearing.

  Bethany could tell it was bothering Nate.

  She saw it in the way he held his shoulders so stiffly as he marched onward. Yes, all the giggles were getting to him—at least that was what she suspected was getting to him. She thought the couple was cute, but it sure did make her think about things she’d be far better off not thinking about…like kissing Nate. And being alone—but she’d given herself a good talking to after having her little pity party out there earlier.

  “I think the first day went well,” she said, later that evening, after they’d gotten camp ready for the night. She was trying for a decent conversation with Nate. They were standing on the outer edge of the campfire’s glow, away from everyone. Darkness had just fallen when they’d finally reached the rustic four-room cabin that would be their lodging for the night. The men bunked in one room, and the women in another. The newlyweds were having separation issues and had cuddled up on one side of the fire like two peas in a pod.

  Nate was glowering again. He stood with arms crossed, his hat pulled down low over his eyes and a big frown on his face. He grunted instead of answering, and in the firelight she saw his eyes shoot toward the couple who were in between kisses and gazing starry-eyed up at the big, expansive sky.

  She’d meant that last comment to get at least a smile, or even a grunt of humor. But no. “You know, you’re going to have to be a bit nicer, or you’re going to give Amy’s tour company a bad name,” she added, only half joking.

  He shot her a glare. “I didn’t know until yesterday that I had a newlywed couple on this tour. How am I supposed to be happy about that? They’ve hardly looked at the scenery. It’s wasted on them.”

  Bethany laughed. “So? What’s wrong with seeing two people in love? Or do you just have something against love?” Maybe she shouldn’t have said that, but the man was being a complete jerk. Yes, sometimes the newlyweds’ kissing was a bit uncomfortable, but only because she was hiking with Nate.

  “This is a family tour.” He wasn’t giving up.

  “Shelly thinks they’re sweet.”

  “I hope they know they won’t be able to live in the real world and not be separated at longer intervals than fifteen minutes. Look at them.”

  “It’s a campfire, Nate. Or don’t you remember?” Oh, now she’d gone and done it! Opened her big mouth and stuck her foot straight in, sideways. And instead of stopping, she just kept on going. “You don’t have any right to judge them,” she finished, doing some glowering of her own.

  He was quiet on that note. They both stared at the fire in uncomfortable silence. She didn’t know for certain what he was thinking, but she was thinking about all the campfires they’d watched burn together…all the cuddling they’d done.

  “We hit a harder area tomorrow,” he said, finally. “You’re going to have to keep a stricter eye on Cody when we stop along the trail. I don’t want him wandering off. Seriously, with all the notice we’ve gotten from the magazine article, the last thing we need is the bad publicity having lost a child out here would bring.”

  Bethany tensed at his words. “For your information, I have been watching him. So have his parents. Where have you been?” she snapped. “You don’t need to worry about Cody. Do you not think I know how to do my job?” Okay, so that wasn’t exactly what she’d meant to say. But really, did the man think she was incompetent?

  “I didn’t say that.”

  “It sounded pretty close to that.”

  They glared at each other, both knowing this had more to do with their past than this moment. Years of anger rioted inside of Bethany, suddenly fighting for exposure and release. Her gaze dropped to his mouth—a hard, grim line. It hurt to remember how he’d once smiled so easily at her. Why had she come on this trip? She should have backed out the instant she found out it was going to be with Nate.

  “Fine,” Nate grunted. “Hear what you want to hear, just watch the boy.”

  Argggg! Bethany wanted to
scream. So much for conversation. That had been a bust from every angle.

  She had a good mind to follow him and give him a big piece of her mind. But she didn’t. What good would it do?

  This was just their first day. Better to let it slide and hope tomorrow was better.

  She was driving him crazy. Nate stopped behind the cabin where the firewood was stacked. It was the second time that day that he’d walked away from Bethany. It was the only way to keep himself out of trouble. When her green eyes flashed like emerald flames, he’d wanted to kiss her. Not because she was so angry, but because all he’d seen was the pain in her eyes when he’d told her he didn’t love her. That pain had caused him more hurt than she would ever know.

  She’d shown him tonight that her spunk was still alive and well and that he hadn’t killed that wonderful part of her.

  But he was goading her to keep his feelings at bay. It wasn’t a good thing.

  He snatched his hat from his head and rammed uneasy fingers through his hair. Bethany had always been alive and full of life. He’d loved that about her. He liked knowing she was still the same Bethany.

  Settling his hat back on his head he grabbed up an armful of logs for the fireplace, and headed back around the cabin to put the wood inside. He was going to have to improve his attitude.

  Just rounding the corner he was startled to see Bethany standing at the far end of the cabin from him. She was leaning against the small building, out of the view of the campers—with her head in her hands. Her shoulders heaved once, as if she was taking a deep breath.

  She looked so alone.

  As alone as he felt. He hated that.

  His heart clenched. He was hurting her again…It took every ounce of willpower to not go to her. But he couldn’t do that. He had to make it through this and then let her go.

  Taking a quiet step backwards, he edged around the corner of the cabin, flattening himself against the rough logs. Leaning his head back, he stared up at the sky, feeling like a number-one loser.

  Out here, God was everywhere. A man couldn’t come to the wilds of Alaska and not know that God was real. He was a tangible presence in this vast, untamed territory, as undeniable as the beauty that surrounded them. And yet, Nate felt as far away from God as he could possibly get.

  He leaned around and peeked at Bethany again, unable to get the picture of her with her head in her hands out of his mind. He’d badgered her into feeling bad. It was his fault she was standing there like that, hiding.

  “Hey there, Mr. Nate! Whatcha doin’?”

  Nate shot away from the building, so startled by the surprise appearance of Cody that he dropped the wood he was carrying. “Cody! What are you doing back here?” he asked, keeping his voice low. Hurriedly, he knelt and started scooping up the wood. Talk about getting caught—the last thing he wanted was for Bethany to realize he was back here and had seen her.

  She might think he was spying on her or something. Boy, that wouldn’t be good.

  “I’m lookin’ for horses. My dad says we’re ridin’ ’em tomorrow, but I can’t find ’em nowhere. You seen any?”

  “They’re being brought in first thing in the morning. Look, Cody, your mamma is going to be looking for you. You don’t need to be going off by yourself.”

  “What’s going on?”

  Too late, Nate slowly turned his head and looked up at Bethany as he picked up the last log. Of course, Cody was all too willing to answer her question.

  “I come lookin’ for horses and found Mr. Nate lookin’ at you,” he said proudly. “I scared him.”

  Nate groaned inwardly as he rose up, forced his shoulders back and met Bethany’s knowing gaze. If it hadn’t been for the slight sliver of light reaching them from a window in the cabin, he wouldn’t have been able to see the way she’d hiked her brow at him.

  “He was watching me?”

  “Yup, I come up behind him and looked around to see if he was lookin’ at horses, but it was only you down there.”

  Talk about being thrown from a bull and trampled—Nate was getting tromped on worse than by a two-thousand-pound killer—by an eight-year-old!

  “I wasn’t—”

  “Cody,” Bethany said, cutting Nate off and reaching for Cody’s hand. “Sweetie, you can’t go wandering around in the dark by yourself. Come on, let’s go find your mother before she misses you.”

  Speaking of which, where was his mom? Nate started to say something. The kid wasn’t being watched as closely as needed—just like Bethany had accused him of saying earlier.

  She cut warning eyes at him and realized she was thinking the same thing. “Don’t say a word. Not one word. He is being watched.” She hissed the last part.

  That said, she marched off with Cody in tow. She was totally not happy that Cody had gotten away from her again. Nate watched her disappear around the corner, and for the first time since she’d come to town, he felt a smile crack across his face.

  She was just as cute being mad at twenty-nine as she’d been when she was nineteen.

  Chapter Six

  The cabin had been stocked with fresh eggs, bacon and biscuit mix to enable the guests to have a hearty breakfast. Bethany woke early to the soft beeping of her alarm so that she could help prepare it. She hadn’t hiked much in a very long time and she’d fallen asleep from exhaustion the moment her head hit the pillow. She was glad she could move without hurting too much.

  Just as she’d assumed, Nate was up when she entered the main room. He glanced up from adding a log to the wood stove. “Good morning.”

  The man shouldn’t look so wonderful at five-thirty in the morning. It was a crime, that’s what it was. She probably looked like roadkill, while he looked like the poster boy for the Now Woman magazine article, with his five o’clock shadow and piercing blue eyes. The man was incredibly handsome, but standing there in his red flannel shirt and jeans—okay, whoa, it was not good for her to continually think about him like this.

  “Are you okay this morning?” he asked. “Not still mad at me?”

  She expected it. “No. I’m fine. Cody is fine, and I’ll make sure to keep watch over him today. He is quick. Shelly said he was there and then he was gone. She was really sorry he got away from her like that.”

  “Kids get away fast. You and I both know that from previous tours. I’m not trying to be un reasonable.”

  “I know that,” she said, knowing as well as he did that there was much more going on between them than what was being said. Yes, Cody’s safety was a major concern, but this wasn’t just about Cody. Looking away, she walked to the small kitchen counter and grabbed the biscuit mix, fighting the urge to ask him if he’d really been spying on her last night. According to Cody, he’d been watching her around the corner. When he stalked off she was so mad she’d needed a minute to herself. He’d gone into the woods, on the other side of the cabin. At least she thought he had, and that was why she’d chosen the far side of the cabin to take a few minutes alone. She didn’t expect him to see her.

  He came and stood beside her as she began preparing the biscuit mix. His arm brushed hers when he reached for the large skillet and the bacon. They had this routine down. They’d done many breakfast for their tours together and they fell back into their routine like it had been yesterday.

  “I wasn’t sure you’d remember about the breakfast, since I didn’t mention it.”

  She paused from mixing the biscuits and looked up at him. “I remember.” She took a breath and refocused on the biscuits. Beside her, Nate was silent, but she could feel his gaze on her as she dumped the biscuit dough onto the counter and reached for the rolling pin. Her arm brushed his again and that aggravatingly, wonderful electrical shock wave of awareness sizzled through her—not good. Not good.

  “Yeah, me, too,” he said, turning to the stove, where he began frying the bacon in the skillet he’d been heating.

  There wasn’t anything Bethany had forgotten about their time together. She’d tried, but Nate had b
ecome a larger-than-life figure in her memory, and it was hard to wipe an image like that away. No man had ever stood a chance, going up against his memory…even after the heartache he’d caused her.

  These five days with him should help that.

  Surely, by the time they were done she wouldn’t have this overblown image of him blocking her good sense. She’d remember all the not so good things about him. Surely, at twenty-nine she could see clearly. Starting now…with getting her thoughts back on track with this trip, and not on the man standing beside her.

  “Is there anything I need to know about today?” she asked, moving slightly, so that there was no chance of her arm brushing his again. This was business.

  “The horses will be arriving in about an hour. Royce is bringing them over from the ranch.”

  “How is Royce?” She’d always loved Nate’s ranch foreman and his wife. “And Sue, how is she?”

  “They’re doing well. Royce keeps threatening to retire, but Sue just laughs and tells him to stop fibbing.”

  Bethany smiled as she plopped the cut-out biscuits into the skillet. “I always loved those two.”

  “They loved you, too.”

  Bethany couldn’t stop herself. She looked at him hard. He turned instantly back to his frying bacon. “The biscuits are ready for the oven,” she said, holding down the flare of anger.

  She wouldn’t do that. She wouldn’t go there. Today it was about being reasonable and getting along. It wasn’t about the past.

  As if summoned, in that moment lights cut across the dark windows of the cabin and the low growl of a truck filled the air. “Looks like Royce is running early,” Nate said, lifting bacon from the pan with a fork and placing it on a paper towel-covered plate.

  “I’ll let him in.”

  Bethany hurried to the door and opened it just a crack, not wanting to let the cold air into the warm cabin as she waited for the lanky cowboy. Royce hopped from the cab of the Dodge and ambled her way. She widened the crack just as he stepped up onto the small porch and grinned widely.