I hold my stomach, feeling the scar, and attempt to accept what it means.
Riley is gone.
Unless… Unless I’m wrong and that was some horrible nightmare. Maybe I’m still back down in the tunnels. Or possibly I’m still on Earth! Marduke, Logan, and I are hiding out in that forest, safe and alive and happy. I can’t wish for it to be earlier than that because then Riley won’t exist.
Okay, so all I have to do is wake up then, right?
I close my eyes, even though that is the opposite of waking up, but I’m hoping, when I open them, I see something different. I picture the forest back on Earth; remember the trees, the crisp air, and having Marduke and Logan at my side.
Tears well behind my eyelids and my heart pounds painfully in my chest, but when I open my eyes, I see the same as before. I see the off white walls, the strange warped mirror and a shelf on the end with bizarre tools and a couple horrifying needles. I try to move, my arms jerking in fear, but then I notice that my legs are stuck.
I sit up and feel a dizziness knock me back down. I take a few deep breaths and try again, this time slower. Staring at my ankles, I can’t see any visible restraints, but my skin stretches and pulls like there is something holding them down.
I then realise there is something stuck in my arm. It’s almost like a drip except the tube has blood in it. Are they taking my blood or giving it to me?
I’m not sure I want to know the answer.
I pull it out of me, ignoring the pain and uncaring of the blood now spilling over the ground and dripping from my arm.
I lie back down, my mind circling over the thoughts that I’ve lost Riley. I’ve failed him and didn’t protect him. I should have done more to keep him safe. I should have fought harder. Moreover, I never should have assumed those tunnels were safe. Marduke assured me they were, and I took him at his word. Yet he was wrong. They weren’t safe, and now everyone I love is dead.
Hannah, Logan, Lisa, and Hope are all dead because we stayed in those tunnels. They’re all dead because we were placed on Oden. They’re dead because Marduke and his people decided to invade Earth and take everything away from us.
Deep down, I know he never intended for this to happen, but it did happen, and now I’ve lost everything.
Hatred fills me inside, competing with my depression that has already begun taking over me. I feel at war with myself. Therefore I close my eyes, wishing I wasn’t here at all. Not trapped with Jeprow and not stuck on Oden. I wish I was dead. I have nothing left. If there is really an afterlife, a heaven, or any type of peace that comes with death, I want it now.
Exhaustion overwhelms me, and even given the unknown and danger of the situation I’m in, I close my eyes and let myself be taken away by darkness.
***
“Mattie, wake now…” a soft voice coos me awake, yet I don’t want to leave the warm bubble I’m wrapped in. An instinct within me shouts that I don’t want to become aware again, but then something slams down loudly close to me and my eyes jolt open.
Jeprow’s fist is against the shelf and everything else that has been their earlier is gone. He’s glaring at me, but quickly, his stare changes to one of happiness.
“Welcome to aware. It good day be alive,” he says in his stilted English.
I don’t know what to say to him. A small part of me wants to yell, scream, and fight him. I want to hurt him as much as he’s hurt me, but I don’t think there is anything I can do to hurt him to that extent.
“You quiet, unusual you for. Worry not; I have you screaming in time.” He steps up to me, his fingers moving over my stomach and tracing the scar that is now there. “Fwer, our healer, dispose remains, clean you up. Now you healthy than you be ever.” His fingers move up my stomach, moving between my breasts and touching my bra.
Disgust fills me and I slap his hand away, trying to move off the bed I’m trapped on, but my legs are still restrained. I instead begin to fall off the side.
Jeprow grabs my arm and hauls me back up, his grip only tightening over me once I’m there. As he leans over me, his face dangerously close to mine, his other hand grabs my jaw and holds me in place, his touch sending pain radiating over me as he holds onto my already abused face.
“There is fight I love squash. You be fun break. I told medic heal but face. I add to it soon.” He pushes away from me, giving me a moment to release a shaky breath.
“Marduke escape, leave you to his fate. They cowards, and while think it fun keep you as pet, I must kill you. It will not short and will painful. I will enjoy, but you not.” He touches each of my ankles and the unseen restraint releases. I don’t make a move. However, when Jeprow grabs hold of my arm and yanks me forward, I don’t have much choice.
I follow, barely able to keep my feet under me, and am taken through what I realise is a spaceship, perhaps the same one I was brought to Oden on. I’m led into an area which I think might be where the ship is controlled from. This has a similar appearance to the spaceship me, Hank, and the others stepped onto on Roth before I accidently sent us all away. It is mostly clear of clutter, and I assume the blank panels light up with buttons as soon as it is touched by the correct species.
I won’t be able to make any of this work now, not without Riley.
In the corner, there is a guard standing in front of a large case, one that is as tall as Jeprow and just as wide. Two other guards stand at opposite sides of the room. The only area where a guard doesn’t stand is by the rail, which is the only thing that gives a warning that the edge is there. As Jeprow pushes me forward, I look down to find a thin layer of glass. Through the clear glass, the level falls dramatically, and at the bottom of the pit are at least a dozen creatures. If the fall down doesn’t kill you, they definitely will.
“I like have close to me. It remind me how far I come and how strong I to restrain violent beast,” he whispers in my ear. Then his voice changes as he pulls me back, addressing the men around him.
A new man walks towards the panels. As his hands brush over them, symbols come to life. Screens appear around me, blocking my view. I see darkness only lightened by fire in the surrounding areas.
People are running, guns and other weapons in their hands as creatures stampede over them, crushing and killing humans with ease. Blood and body parts litter the area, and I have to look away from the gruesome images.
“These fellow humans die. I believe they bait me. Another betray you serve your humans.”
If possible, my heart feels even heavier in my chest. His words might not be accurate since I never wanted this, but that doesn’t change the fact that humans are dying every second. They’re dying for a cause that has nothing to do with us.
“Why are you doing this? Don’t you think you’ve gotten your revenge now?” I ask, the first words I’ve spoken aloud since I woke up.
“I will satisfy when every Lomh dead. When their traitorous people dead. When Oden belong me.”
I don’t know how to respond to that because he sounds crazy. How do you respond properly to a crazy person? Besides, I don’t want to have to interact with Jeprow at all. I want to go back to sleep and never wake up. I want to dream of a world where everyone I love isn’t dead.
I’m staring down at my feet, but I notice the picture brightens from the reflection on the floor. Looking up, I see myself reflected on the screen, as though it’s a mirror. I wince, noticing how beaten up I appear and that my shirt is still open, showing a column of my bra and stomach. I don’t even bother to attempt covering myself up. My arms hang limply down by my sides, and I’m rather surprised my legs are holding me up.
Jeprow steps towards the mirror image, now showing him, too, and begins speaking into it. He’s not speaking English, and I find myself distracted by my passing thoughts of what is happening now to the humans still fighting. I feel a responsibility to them, but I don’t know what I’m supposed to do about that.
When Jeprow grabs my hair, pulling me forward, I crouch over, trying to lessen
the grip he has on me, but he just pulls harder. He’s almost yelling into the screen now, and I don’t know what he’s doing. Who is he talking to?
His fist comes out of nowhere, and I’m struck against the side of my head. I lose my balance, falling forward, although since he is still gripping my hair with his free hands, I’m held up. He loosens his hold over me for a moment, hair piling around me as he lets go of the strands that rip away from my scalp, and then then he takes my arm, pulling me to my feet so he can again knock me over. I fall back to the ground, sliding across from him and stopping close to one of the guards.
Jeprow rolls out a tall trolley from the side of the room and grins down at it.
“Mattie, I have things I use you on,” he taunts.
Out of habit, I search for a weapon I can use to defend myself, but there is nothing of use near me. Besides, if I try to take on Jeprow, then there are three guards plus the guy in front of the panel who I’m sure will quickly step in and stop me. There is no way I can possibly get out of this alive. If he intends to kill me here today, then that is what will happen. There is nothing I can do to prevent it.
He stomps over to me, grabbing my hair and dragging me over to the trolley. When we reach it, he pulls me up so that I’m standing. My vision wavers for a second before I focus on the torture devices in front of me.
Most I’ve never seen before, all of them look sharp and unpleasant, but then I see the corner of something familiar. My hand reaches out, hoping to take hold of it, but Jeprow grabs my wrist and twists it behind my back, bending it in such a way that sends agony radiating up my arm and through my shoulder.
“I thought fun use human torture tool, too,” he murmurs.
He leans in close to me and his breath touches my neck, his body odour engulfing me and making me feel instantly dirty. He smells of death, decay, and sweat.
The man by the controls saves me from whatever else Jeprow plans to do just then. I don’t know what he says, but their words cause Jeprow to step away from me. While he speaks in hushed tones to the man, I take a deep breath, glancing down at the weapons I’ve been left alone with. The guard behind me isn’t paying attention to me, but the one in front is, as is the one by the large case. I move slowly around the trolley, careful not to look eager, and try to focus on the creatures as I near the railing. If they think I’m only moving to get a better look at them, then they might be less suspicious of me.
“Mattie, you have call,” Jeprow says, his voice taunts, but his expression appears curious.
“Mattie, it’s me, Ival.” Ival’s words wrap around me, his voice appearing to come from every direction.
“Hi?” I mumble, unsure what is happening or why Ival is “calling” me.
“I’ve been told I’m allowed to have one last conversation with you before you are killed.”
I stop breathing. Deep down, I knew Jeprow would kill me and there was a very real chance I would die today, but having Ival confirm it doesn’t make me feel any better.
“Why you?” I wonder if he’s with Marduke. Does he not want to talk to me because he blames me for losing Riley? Does he hate me now?
“I want to say that I am sorry for what you have lost here. I want you to know that, if you can do something for me, then I can ensure your humans get their planet back.”
“What?” I gasp, not certain if Ival is lying or not. What could he possibly want me to do? Especially since Jeprow is listening to every word.
“Just remember about what airplanes have so that, when they go down, your people can figure out what went wrong.”
“What does that mean?” Jeprow growls, his curiosity giving way to his anger.
I am just about to ask him what a black box has to do with anything, but then I remember the conversation I overheard between him and Marduke. They spoke of a black box that Jeprow has that is preventing them from properly fighting back. In fact, that is the reason so many humans are being killed right now. They’re meant to be causing a distraction so Marduke and Ival can find them. Is he saying it’s on this spaceship, right now?
Even if it is, he has to know I’ll have very little chance to get to it, and definitely no chance of survival. Then again, I’m already going to die today. Maybe going out on my own terms—doing something positive for this war—will make my death easier. Maybe it can help ease some of the guilt I feel inside.
“You should also know that your humans that were with us in the tunnel aren’t dead.”
My jaw drops. I’m not sure if he’s telling me the truth. Perhaps he’s hopeful I might try harder if I think they’re alive. It doesn’t matter, though. I only have a small amount of fight left inside me, and as soon as he promised to return Earth, I was always going to give it everything I have. It might be another lie, but I have to believe in something. Subsequently, I am going to choose to believe he’s telling me the truth.
Earth will be returned to us, and Hannah, Logan, Lisa, Hank, and every other human left will be free.
“Thank you, Ival. I understand,” I say as I turn my back on the railing and stare at Jeprow.
He’s over by the man at the controls. I get the distinct feeling he’s cutting off communication with Ival. That’s okay, because I got what I needed from him.
I edge a little closer to the trolley, my eyes landing on the gun. I silently pray it’s loaded. Once I show them my hand, they will know what I am planning to do.
I count down from three in my head, my mind showing me the image of Riley I saw on the tablet when I was with Hannah. Now it will be the only image of my baby I’ll ever see. I use that outrage and loss to fuel my energy, and then, when I get down to one, I leap at the trolley.
I grab a hold of the gun and have just enough time to take aim and fire at the guard closest to me, shooting him straight in the forehead. I had aimed to hit his chest. My hands are shaking and that isn’t a good thing, but I got lucky this time.
Strangely, the next guard closest to me doesn’t rush at me, but instead, moves over to the now dead guard and blocks my view of the large case behind. What is so important about that case that he’s willing to use his body to shield it?
I see movement in the corner of my eye and shoot at the guard over there as he leaps towards me. I hit his shoulder first before I take another shot, and this time, I get a direct hit to his chest.
The man over by the controls ducks for cover, moving across the room, appearing as though he’s running away, scared. I know he isn’t my biggest threat in this room, therefore I turn my head to search for Jeprow. Instead, my eyes land back on the guard, and just to be safe, I fire at him, too. He falls on top of the previously dead guard, and again, I stare at the large case he was willing to stand in front of. Why? What is it?
Then it clicks in my mind that this large case could be considered some huge box. A huge, black box. For some reason, when I overheard Ival and Marduke talking about black boxes, I thought they must be small enough to carry. This looks like it is easily over two hundred pounds. It’s solid and taller than me. Is this what I am supposed to destroy? Will breaking this win us the war? Could it be that easy?
I raise the gun, ready to shoot at it, when Jeprow jumps me from the side and we both crash to the ground. The gun flies out of my hand and slides over the edge and onto the glass below.
I struggle to get free, but Jeprow moves across me, pinning me down to the ground.
“You kill best men!” he screams at me, grabbing hold of my neck with both of his large hands and squeezing until I can get no air in or out.
I claw and scratch at his hands, but he’s too strong. Starving for air, I know soon I will pass out, and if he doesn’t stop, then I will die. I have one option I can see.
I lift my knee up hard and fast and make direct contact with his groin. It’s a move that works on humans, and clearly, it works on this species as well.
He gasps in pain, moving his hands off me. In his shock, I’m able to roll him off me. As he huddles on his side, trying
to catch his breath, I take my borrowed seconds and jump to my feet, stumbling towards the tray of torture devices. I grab a large, thick knife and also something that looks like a drill.
I leap towards the large, black case, not knowing how I’m supposed to destroy it. Then I get an idea.
Dropping my weapons, I shove the huge case, finding it isn’t as heavy as I’ve thought. Leaning my shoulder against it, I push it until it slides along the ground. My shoulder feels bruised by the time I get it near the railing, and I change to kicking it when I can’t seem to push it over the edge. It finally breaks the rail and tips over the edge.
I watch as it crashes down onto the glass. Unfortunately, it doesn’t break through the glass. It cracks in some places, but that is it. The case doesn’t even appear damaged by my rough treatment.
I am considering my options when Jeprow charges up behind me, apparently recovered from my earlier hit. He throws me across the damaged rail and onto the glass below. It cracks underneath my feet and I cry out, watching the creatures beneath me staring up at us. They look starved. I have no doubt I will be killed within seconds of falling from this glass if it breaks now.
Jeprow jumps onto the frail glass next. Where his feet land, I watch the glass crack further and a large line continues to travel straight through to me.
While he stalks towards me, moving swiftly and angrily, I’m on my back, crawling away from him, afraid not only of the creatures below me, but also the monster in front of me that is ready to deliver pain and death.
I keep crawling, my hand brushing against the gun he has thrown over here. I take my chance, quickly grabbing it and shooting.
I miss. My aim is wide, hitting the broken rail, ricocheting off and hitting the glass.
I watch in what feels like slow motion as the glass breaks at one end, the splintering and shattering rushing towards me as it spreads. The black case begins to fall and I know there is no way it will still be working once it lands. I’ve done my job. Now I just need Ival to do his.
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