His Alone

by Alexa Riley

  “`Cause I was happy. I don’t think I’ve truly been happy until I was with you. You made me light up inside. Made the real me come out. No walls or mask. I could just be me, and I knew you loved the real me. Faults and all. I’d never had that before. Someone who would do anything for me without a thought for themselves, and then I thought it was gone. All a lie.”

  “Kitten.” The word comes out pained.

  “But I saw you tonight. Heard the words you said to my father. You said you’d do anything for me. I’d do anything for you, too. I love you more than anything. I don’t think I can breathe without it,” I admit. When he was gone, the walls had started to close in.

  “No more secrets, no more lies,” he says. Everything is out in the open now. All of it.

  I throw myself into his arms so hard that it topples him onto the floor. His lips connect with mine as he rolls us over so that I’m under him. He puts his weight on me, and it’s a welcome pressure. The knowledge that he’s here with me and that I’m safe allows all the years of worry and sadness to leave me. It’s like he’s chased away all my demons and I have a new beginning.

  His lips are fierce and demanding as I give him what he wants. The kiss is desperate, and we cling together as if it’s been years since we’ve held each other.

  “I love you,” I whisper through kisses, and his mouth echoes the same. The three words are repeated like a chant over and over in the space that separates our lips. With every syllable, we are one step closer to leaving our ghosts behind and righting the wrongs between us.

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Ryan

  * * *

  “NAKED. Now,” I growl against her mouth, and start tearing at her clothes. I hear the sound of cloth ripping, but I can’t be bothered to slow down and check.

  Everything is in the open, and we’ve both come clean. Now I need to bind us together to seal this deal. I want inside of her more than I want air in my lungs. She fists my shirt, and I lean back to let her pull it off me. I’ve pushed her hoodie off her and torn her sports bra away. She kicks off her leggings, and I open the front of my pants, pulling out my steel-hard cock, throbbing with need. She looks down at it and widens her thighs for me, moving her ankles around my waist. The aggressive look in her eyes has me wild with lust. In a flip of a switch, she’s gone from tender, sweet kissing to wild passion, and I’m right there with her. We’ve made sweet love, and it’s earth-shatteringly beautiful. But right now we need to reconnect, and our primal needs are the loudest voices in the room.

  There’s a perfectly good bed right beside us, but we don’t have time for that.

  I push her legs off my hips and move quickly down to her pussy. I give her one long lick before moving back and lining up my cock with her opening. I want the smell and taste of her on me as I take her. I thrust fully into her in one hard stroke, and her nails dig into my shoulders as she cries out in pleasure.

  I blanket my body over hers, giving her some of my weight. The flavor of her pussy on my tongue makes me act savage as I grunt on top of her. Her hips move in time with mine, our wild lust fueling the need. She moans my name, and she doesn’t take her gaze from mine as she rakes her nails down my back.

  Taking her mouth, I let the flavor of her desire pass between us, and it ratchets up my need for her. I slip my arms around her back and hold her closer to me as I thrust. With Paige, it’s always like the first time, given how perfect she feels. I can’t ever get close enough, but I keep trying. Moving inside her deeper and harder, feeling her clench around me. Our passion is building and it’s going to break me in two when we finally explode.

  I’ve waited so long to have her like this. To have no secrets and both of us truly exposed. It makes every kiss sweeter, every touch more tender, and my want for her that much stronger. Everything that happened led us to this, and I wouldn’t change a thing. The feel of her under me is raw and real. I’ve never experienced a connection so strong that it literally brought me to my knees. But Paige does that to me. She has me wrapped around her finger, and one look can bend me to her will. One day she will understand the power she holds over me, but until then, I’ll try every day to show her. To let her see what she does to me, and that I will never, ever stop fighting for her.

  “Ryan,” she breathes against my lips, and I feel her shudder under me.

  I move my mouth down her neck and to her breasts, taking one nipple in my mouth and then the other. I hold her body up slightly off the floor, bringing her chest to my mouth as I thrust into her. I alternate kisses and nibbles on each breast as I keep a steady tempo between her legs. She clenches around me, and I hear her cries become louder as she nears her orgasm.

  “Tell me you love me when you come, kitten. I want to hear your pleasure wrapped in it.”

  She clenches hard on my cock one more time as I suck her nipple into my mouth. Her back arches and she shouts the words I want to hear as her body peaks under me. Waves of her release pulse on my cock, and I have no choice but to join her. I hold myself inside her as deep as I can go, and release all that I have into her.

  Hearing her chant my name with whispers of love as she climaxes is heaven on earth. I hold her close to me as we catch our breath and come back to reality. It takes all the strength in me to pull out, but I do. I scoop up her boneless body and lay her on my bed. I finish kicking off my boots and pants so I’m completely naked before I climb in next to her.

  She’s on her side facing me, and my eyes roam her beautiful curves. I stretch my hand out and pet her from her shoulder down to her thigh, unable to stop myself from tracing her lines. Her eyes are heavy with sleep and lust, and I want her again so badly. I had her seconds ago and it already feels like an eternity.

  “Do you remember the first time we met?” I ask, and she rolls her eyes, smirking at me.

  “Of course I do.”

  “I was so nervous that day. I couldn’t sleep the night before because I knew you were coming in. Miles had already talked to you and convinced you to work for him. You were to come meet me, since I would be your contact person for the duration of your job.”

  “Why were you nervous?” She reaches out, running her fingers through my chest hair.

  “Because I knew you were the one.” I shrug like it’s obvious. “I was meeting my future that day, and it was so exciting and scary. But the second you walked in the door, I felt a calm fall on me.”

  I place my hand over hers and press her palm flat over my heart.

  “You wore jeans and a dark blue sweatshirt that made your eyes look like brilliant stones. Your hair was pulled up, and you came in with a scowl on your face. You had the biggest chip on your shoulder, and all it did was make me want you more.”

  “God, I was so pissed that day. I didn’t want to have to report to you. I just wanted to do my job watching Mallory and be done with it. I hated the thought of having someone keeping tabs on my every move.” She smiles and shakes her head. “You were such a pain in the ass.”

  “I was,” I agree, smiling at her. “I wanted to get your attention, and the only thing that seemed to do it was when you were trying to tell me off. That auburn ponytail was swishing back and forth as I was going over what I wanted from you. You gave me so much attitude I could only smile the whole time.”

  “You did it on purpose.”

  “Most of it, yes. I wanted to see you riled up. To see if I could pull out of you even a tenth of the passion I had. You were so tough that day. But I could see past that concrete wall you had in front of you. I saw that there was something special underneath. That behind the tough exterior was a tender woman who was afraid to let someone love her.”

  She nods, and I bring her hand up to my mouth, kissing her wrist.

  “That day changed my life, Paige. Seeing you there was incredible, but before I handed you the paperwork and you left, we had that moment.”

  She looks at me and nods, remembering it, too.

  “I held on to it, not wanting you to leave.
I knew once you had the information, you’d be gone, and I didn’t know when I’d see you again.”

  “I had that feeling, too,” she confesses.

  “I had to let you go, and it was the hardest thing I’d ever done. But when I reached out and touched your cheek, I knew you were the one. I couldn’t let you go without that one touch, because I had to have something. I knew when I saw your picture you were it for me, but having you in front of me and being able to connect made it real.”

  I reach over her to a bedside table and pull out the small box. I lean back and place it between us, letting her look at it.

  “That day after you left I bought this. Because I knew that it was yours, and no matter what you chose, this would always belong to you. I would never have another woman in my life if you wouldn’t have me, so I waited until you couldn’t turn me away.”

  “Ryan,” she whispers, but doesn’t move.

  “I’ve already called you my fiancée, and in truth you have been since that first day we met. You just didn’t know it.” She laughs as the tears start to fall, and I kiss her wrist again. “I married you in my heart the night we first made love. One day, I want to make it legal, but in my soul, I’m already there.”

  “You really are a caveman,” she says, and I laugh with her. She’s definitely not wrong.

  “I should get on one knee and ask you in a field of butterflies or something.” She smiles and shakes her head like I’m ridiculous, but I know she loves it. “But I can’t take the chance of you not saying yes. So you’ll marry me, Paige. You and I will be together until the end of time. We’ll make babies, have fights, make up, laugh, cry, and spend every moment of every day as one.”

  “Oh God,” she says, and closes her eyes.

  “I promise to give you the family you deserve and the one you’ve always wanted, deep down. I promise to give you a hard time and be a pain in your ass, because you really do love it.”

  She tries to smack my chest, but I tighten my grip on her wrist with one hand and open the ring box with the other. I take out the simple band with the solitaire stone and place it on her ring finger. Once it’s there, I kiss it and look into her eyes.

  “I promise to love you without hesitation, without exceptions and without a single doubt. You are mine until the earth stands still and there’s not a breath left in me.”

  She looks down at the three-carat ruby, and shock is clear on her face. It’s the one she saw the day we first met. There was a jewelry store right outside, and I watched as she left the building and stopped in front of the window. She stood and stared at it for a moment, but I could see something in her eyes. I found out later what it truly was. I saw all the hopes and dreams she’d ever had placed on that stone. She walked away that day dismissing its possibilities, but I saw more. And I was going to do everything I could to give it to her.

  She nods, not saying a word. She doesn’t need to speak, because there’s nothing to say. My heart belongs to her, and hers to me.

  I roll her on her back and move on top of her. My lips connect with hers, softly this time, more tender than when we made love on the floor. This time it’s slow and sweet, and I spend hours worshiping every inch of her body. When we find release, it’s more passionate than anything I’d ever dreamed possible.

  Afterward I hold her, and I know what true love is.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Paige

  * * *

  “OH MY GOD, we’re moving out of this building,” I moan, trying to crawl from the bed. Can I not go one day without someone banging on a door and waking me up? I don’t make it one step and Captain is pulling me back onto the bed and caging my body with his. He’s giving me his wide morning smile. We’re going to have to work on this perky morning thing he’s got going on.

  “I’ll get it,” he says, before taking my mouth in a soft, lazy kiss, making me melt back into the bed. I don’t care that someone is banging on his front door at God knows what time. He pulls his body mine, and I make to grab at him, but he keeps moving as I latch around his back and he stands.

  “Kitten, I love you hanging on to me, but I’m not answering the door with you naked unless you have a death wish for whoever’s on the other side.”

  I smile, nipping at his neck before I drop my feet to the floor and let him go.

  He grabs a pair of boxer briefs from his dresser, cursing when the banging on the front door comes again.

  “Jesus. It’s not even morning,” I growl.

  “It’s almost noon,” Captain corrects. I glance over at the clock on his nightstand. Wow. He must have really gone at me last night. When I look back at him, I can see him thinking the same thing with a smirk on his face. His eyes roam over my naked body, clearly ready to do it all over again.

  I bend down, picking up his shirt and handing it to him.

  “You put this on unless you want me to claw someone’s eyes out.” He smiles even bigger as he takes the shirt from me and slides it over his head. I start digging for some gym shorts. Captain has a great chest, but his legs are my weakness. His thick thighs might be the hottest thing about him.

  “Why the fuck does it turn me on when you get jealous?” he asks, as I find the shorts and hand them to him. I roll my eyes.

  The banging is louder this time.

  “Open the fucking door!” I hear Miles bellow, surprising us both. Captain heads out of the room, and I search for something to wear, opting for one of his shirts. I slip it on, and it falls all the way to my knees and hangs off one shoulder. Jesus, he’s huge.

  “She’s naked. Don’t go back there,” I hear Captain say, and that’s followed by a curse from Miles. The door swings open; Mallory barrels in, throwing herself at me. I fall back, both of us hitting the bed, with her landing on top of me. She starts sobbing, and I wrap my arms around her.

  “I’m fine,” I whisper to her. Then she’s being pulled from me. Miles picks her up and puts her on her feet. Then he’s pulling me from the bed, too. Shock hits me when his arms wrap around me, the hug so hard and tight I almost can’t breathe.

  “I want to fucking beat your ass,” he grits out between clenched teeth. When I pull back to look up at him, I can see relief on his face. “I told you I would help you. You don’t fucking run off like that alone. You hear me? I’m your brother. I would have gone with you. If something happened to you…” He shakes his head. “Fuck!” he barks again, pulling me in for another hug as tight as the last. “I should have protected you. Not pulled you into my plans. Got you wrapped up in our father’s mess. I did this all wrong. I’m sorry, Paige. I should be taking care of you.”

  I hug him back, holding him tight. It’s a comfort I didn’t know I needed until this moment, having my brother hold me and tell me it’s going to be okay.

  “I get it. If anyone gets wanting to go after him, I do,” I tell him. I would have done anything to go after my father. I never felt used by Miles. The only thing I ever felt was that I was cheated out of having some kind of relationship with my brother, but I never thought he wanted that.

  “We are changing this. Starting new. Having a different kind of family.” He demands it, like he does most things.

  “I like the sound of that,” I agree.

  “Alexander can—”

  “He’s dead,” Captain says, cutting off Miles’s words. Miles slowly lets me go, glancing between Captain and me. The question is clear, but I really don’t want to go over all of it again. He and Captain can have that conversation. I’m done with my father. Done with living in the past. Done with not living at all. My life is mine now. Nothing’s hanging over my head. I’m free.

  “Good,” Mal says, her voice filled with tears, clearly not caring that one of us killed someone last night. “You two are so adorable,” she adds, looking from Miles to me before walking over and trying to wrap her arms around both of us. “These pregnancy hormones are the worst,” she exclaims into a group hug of her making. She gives a little hiccup. I laugh.

&n
bsp; “You’re crazy,” I tell her.

  I step back from the hug, and Miles pulls Mal into him, comforting her.

  “She was like this most of the night. I couldn’t get it out of her for the longest time. Finally, I got her to crack.”

  “Sorry,” she says, pulling her face out of Miles’s chest. “I know you didn’t want me to tell him but…” She hiccups again.

  Captain comes up behind me, his front to my back as he wraps one arm around me, locking me to him.

  “It’s fine,” I tell her.

  “It’s not fine.” Miles shakes his head. “I’m glad he’s gone. The world is a better place without him,” he admits. “But I should have been better with you. I should have known everything. Fuck, I should have put the pieces together. Not asked my seventeen-year-old sister to plot revenge with me.”

  I’m not sure Miles would have ever been down with killing Alexander. He wanted to make him suffer. That was his revenge. To make Alexander feel pain like he’d made his mother feel. In that way we are alike. We both wanted to do to him what he’d done to our mothers.

  “You didn’t really, Miles. I mean, all you ever did was send me to college. Make sure I was taken care of. You never promised me anything about our father except that you’d make him pay.” He’d shielded me from it, even if he hadn’t realized he had.

  We might not have been close at the time, but he pulled me off the streets and gave me a purpose. Gave me a life and a goal to work toward. In the end, I got a family. I wouldn’t be standing here without him.

  “It’s over,” Captain says from behind me, placing a kiss on the top of my head. I bring my hands up, holding the arm that’s holding me.

  “We can move on,” I confirm.

  “Did you…” Mal asks. I shake my head, understanding that she’s asking if I’m the one who did it. She looks at Captain and smiles up at him.

  “Sorry I punched you,” she says sheepishly. Miles picks up her hand and kisses it. “Miles told me everything. That you’ve been working with him since Alexander tried to use you to get close to Miles.”