The New Testament

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The New Testament Page 1

by Jericho Brown




  Jericho Brown

  The New Testament

  PICADOR

  In memory of

  Messiah Demery

  (1981–2008)

  One’s lover—or one’s brother, or one’s enemy—sees the face you wear, and this face can elicit the most extraordinary reactions.

  JAMES BALDWIN

  Contents

  I

  Colosseum

  Romans 12:1

  Heartland

  Another Elegy

  Cain

  Labor

  The Interrogation

  Paradise

  To Be Seen

  Langston’s Blues

  ’N’em

  II

  The Ten Commandments

  Homeland

  Host

  Football Season

  The Rest We Deserve

  What the Holy Do

  Reality Show

  Willing to Pay

  Dear Dr. Frankenstein

  Another Elegy

  Motherland

  I Corinthians 13:11

  Hustle

  III

  Another Elegy

  Obituary

  Psalm 150

  A Living

  After the Rapture

  Hebrews 13

  Angel

  Receiving Line

  Make-Believe

  Found: Messiah

  Another Angel

  Eden

  Another Elegy

  At the End of Hell

  Heart Condition

  Nativity

  Apocrypha

  I

  Colosseum

  I don’t remember how I hurt myself,

  The pain mine

  Long enough for me

  To lose the wound that invented it

  As none of us knows the beauty

  Of our own eyes

  Until a man tells us they are

  Why God made brown. Then

  That same man says he lives to touch

  The smoothest parts, suggesting our

  Surface area can be understood

  By degrees of satin. Him I will

  Follow until I am as rough outside

  As I am within. I cannot locate the origin

  Of slaughter, but I know

  How my own feels, that I live with it

  And sometimes use it

  To get the living done,

  Because I am what gladiators call

  A man in love—love

  Being any reminder we survived.

  Romans 12:1

  I will begin with the body,

  In the year of our Lord,

  Porous and wet, love-wracked

  And willing: in my 23rd year,

  A certain obsession overtook

  My body, or I should say,

  I let a man touch me until I bled,

  Until my blood met his hunger

  And so was changed, was given

  A new name

  As is the practice among my people

  Who are several and whole, holy

  And acceptable. On the whole

  Hurt by me, they will not call me

  Brother. Hear me coming,

  And they cross their legs. As men

  Are wont to hate women,

  As women are taught to hate

  Themselves, they hate a woman

  They smell in me, every muscle

  Of her body clenched

  In fits beneath men

  Heavy as heaven—my body,

  Dear dying sacrifice, desirous

  As I will be, black as I am.

  Heartland

  This is the book of three

  Diseases. Close it, and you’re caught

  Running from my life, nearer its end now

  That you’ve come so far for a man

  Sick in his blood, left lung, and mind.

  I think of him mornings

  I wake panting like a runner after

  His best time. He sweats. He stops

  Facing what burned. The house

  That graced this open lot was

  A red brick. Children played there—

  Two boys, their father actually

  Came home. Mama cooked

  As if she had a right to

  The fire in her hands, to the bread I ate

  Before I saw doctors who help me

  Fool you into believing

  I do anything other than the human thing.

  We breathe until we don’t.

  Every last word is contagious.

  Another Elegy

  Expect death. In every line,

  Death is a metaphor that stands

  For nothing, represents itself,

  No goods for sale. It enters

  Whether or not your house

  Is dirty. Whether or not

  You are clean, you arrive late

  Because you don’t believe her

  When, sobbing as usual, she

  Calls to say if you don’t stop

  Your brother, she will kill him

  This time. Why rush? By now,

  You think she likes it, his hands

  Slapping her seven shades of red.

  Besides, your brother is much

  Bigger than you—once you tried

  Pulling him off the woman he loves

  And lost a tooth. Expect to lose

  Again as you stand for nothing

  Over his body, witness

  Or reporter, murderer or kin.

  Cain

  First, a conversation. Now,

  A volcano. Call me quick-

  Tempered vegan. Turnip

  Lover. Fruit licker. Mound

  Maker. Quiet. I can predict

  An earthquake. I can cook

  A rose. I’m first to kill

  A weed. The collards

  Should come quick this year.

  The beans may be lean.

  I plant seeds and wait

  All winter to eat. Some

  Slaughter sheep for dinner.

  Some chew leaves. Firstborn

  And patient, I give ground

  Color. Pull pink from

  Green. Azalea, vibrant

  As a lamb’s tongue. My kid

  Brother killed one, but I

  Dug the hole, soil still

  Young, lava beneath it

  Near each finger when little

  Brothers tortured most

  Of God’s creatures, and small

  Men watched them bleed.

  Labor

  I spent what light Saturday sent sweating

  And learned to cuss cutting grass for women

  Kind enough to say they couldn’t tell the damned

  Difference between their mowed lawns

  And their vacuumed carpets just before

  Handing over a five-dollar bill rolled tighter

  Than a joint and asking me in to change

  A few lightbulbs. I called those women old

  Because they wouldn’t move out of a chair

  Without my help or walk without a hand

  At the base of their backs. I called them

  Old, and they must have been; they’re all dead

  Now, dead and in the earth I once tended.

  The loneliest people have the earth to love

  And not one friend their own age—only

  Mothers to baby them and big sisters to boss

  Them around, women they want to please

  And pray for the chance to say please to.

  I don’t do that kind of work anymore. My job

  Is to look at the childhood I hated and say

  I once had something to do with my hands.

  The Interrogation

  I. WHERE


  In that world, I was a black man.

  Now, the bridge burns and I

  Am as absent as what fire

  Leaves behind. I thought we ran

  To win the race. My children swear

  We ran to end it. I’d show them

  The starting point, but no sky here

  Allows for rain. The water infects

  Us, and every day, the air darkens…

  The air, the only black thing

  Of concern—

  Who cares what color I was?

  II. CROSS-EXAMINATION

  Do you mean love?

  Certainly a way of loving.

  Did it hurt?

  When doesn’t it?

  We’ll ask the questions. Did it hurt?

  When death enters a child’s room,

  The child feels a draft.

  So you chose for it to hurt.

  I chose my brother over my desire

  To be invisible.

  We thought your brother was dead…

  He is.

  And his death made you

  Visible?

  You only see me

  When I carry a man on my back.

  But you arrived alone.

  That wasn’t me.

  That was the man who lost

  My brother.

  III. STREET DIRECTIONS

  Will black men still love me

  If white ones stop wanting me

  Dead? Will white men stop

  Wanting me dead? Will men

  Like me stop killing men like

  You? Which made us brothers—

  That you shielded my body

  With yours or that you found

  Me here, dying on the pavement,

  And held my empty hand?

  IV. REDIRECT

  Tell us, then, how did that man lose your brother?

  I imagine

  I lost him in the fire.

  The record suggests

  You lost him to a bullet.

  The record was written

  In my first language. The bullet is

  How I lost myself.

  And this preoccupation with color,

  Was that before or after you lost yourself?

  The women who raised me referred to Jesus

  As “our elder brother.”

  And what about race?

  What you call a color I call

  A way.

  Forgive us. We don’t mean to laugh.

  It’s just that black is,

  After all, the absence of color.

  V. FAIRY TALE

  Say the shame I see inching like steam

  Along the streets will never seep

  Beneath the doors of this bedroom,

  And if it does, if we dare to breathe,

  Tell me that though the world ends us,

  Lover, it cannot end our love

  Of narrative. Don’t you have a story

  For me?—like the one you tell

  With fingers over my lips to keep me

  From sighing when—before the queen

  Is kidnapped—the prince bows

  To the enemy, handing over the horn

  Of his favorite unicorn like those men

  Brought, bought, and whipped until

  They accepted their masters’ names.

  VI. MULTIPLE-CHOICE

  Metal makes for a chemical reaction.

  Now that my wrists are cuffed, I am

  Not like a citizen. What touches me

  Claims contamination. What

  A shame. A sham. When the police come

  They come in steel boots. Precious

  Metal. They want me kicked,

  So kick me they do. I cannot say

  They love me. But don’t they seek me out

  As a lover would, each with both hands

  Bringing me to my knees, under God,

  Indivisible? I did not have to be born

  Here. Men in every nation pray

  And some standing and some flat

  On their backs. Pray luscious

  Silver. Pray Christmas. A chain

  A chain. Even if it’s pretty. Even around

  The neck. I cannot say what they love

  Is me with a new bald fist in my mouth.

  Pray platinum teeth. Show me

  A man who tells his children

  The police will protect them

  And I’ll show you the son of a man

  Who taught his children where

  To dig. Not me. Couldn’t be. Not

  On my knees. No citizen begs

  To find anything other than forgiveness.

  VII. LANDMARK

  What Angel of Death flies by each house, waving

  My brother’s soul in front of windows like a toy—

  A masked, muscle-bound action figure with fists

  We wanted when we were children—some light

  Item, a hero our family could never afford?

  Paradise

  That story I told about suffering

  Was a lie. I never wandered

  The woods with a box of matches.

  Truth is I was born in the forest,

  And there, I ran the weather.

  Deer left apples in my hand, so

  I didn’t think to cook the deer.

  The secret of my life was

  My life, hair falling past my neck,

  Beyond my back. I can’t say

  The nights grew cold, but Lord,

  I was bored. What words I spoke

  I yawned. And while I claimed

  To have walked away hearing a voice

  Or a fiddle, that too is untrue.

  When a man leaves, he leaves looking

  For more languages than there are

  Tongues. When a boy leaves, we

  Call him a man. You know that story

  As well as you know my smile, how

  It fit my face once I cut each tooth

  In your well-wrought world, right

  Along with this scar and this

  One and this one and this…

  To Be Seen

  Forgive me for taking the tone of a preacher.

  You understand, a dying man

  Must have a point—not that I am

  Dying exactly. My doctor tells me I’ll live

  Longer than most since I see him

  More than most. Of course, he cannot be trusted

  Nor can any man

  Who promises you life for looking his way. Promises

  Come from the chosen: a lunatic,

  The whitest dove—those who hear

  The voice of God and other old music. I’m not

  Chosen. I only have a point like anyone

  Paid to bring bad news: a preacher, a soldier,

  The doctor. We talk about God

  Because we want to speak

  In metaphors. My doctor clings to the metaphor

  Of war. It’s always the virus

  That attacks and the cells that fight or die

  Fighting. Hell, I remember him saying the word

  Siege when a rash returned. Here

  I am dying while

  He makes a battle of my body—anything to be seen

  When all he really means is to grab me by the chin

  And, like God the Father, say through clenched teeth,

  Look at me when I’m talking to you.

  Your healing is not in my hands, though

  I touch as if to make you whole.

  Langston’s Blues

  “O Blood of the River songs,

  O songs of the River of Blood,”

  Let me lie down. Let my words

  Lie sound in the mouths of men

  Repeating invocations pure

  And perfect as a moan

  That mounts in the mouth of Bessie Smith.

  Blues for the angels kicked out

  Of heaven. Blues for the angels

  Who miss them still. Blues

&n
bsp; For my people and what water

  They know. O weary drinkers

  Drinking from the bloody river,

  Why go to heaven with Harlem

  So close? Why sing of rivers

  With fathers of our own to miss?

  I remember mine and taste a stain

  Like blood coursing the body

  Of a man chased by a mob. I write

  His running, his sweat: here,

  He climbs a poplar for the sky,

  But it is only sky. The river?

  Follow me. You’ll see. We tried

  To fly and learned we couldn’t

  Swim. Dear singing river full

  Of my blood, are we as loud under-

  Water? Is it blood that binds

  Brothers? Or is it the Mississippi

  Running through the fattest vein

  Of America? When I say home,

  I mean I wanted to write some

  Lines. I wanted to hear the blues,

  But here I am swimming the river

  Again. What runs through the fat

  Veins of a drowned body? What

  America can a body call

  Home? When I say Congo, I mean

  Blood. When I say Nile, I mean blood.

  When I say Euphrates, I mean,

  If only you knew what blood

  We have in common. So much,

  In Louisiana, they call a man like me

  Red. And red was too dark

  For my daddy. And my daddy was

  Too dark for America. He ran

  Like a man from my mother

  And me. And my mother’s sobs

  Are the songs of Bessie Smith

  Who wears more feathers than

  Death. O the death my people refuse

  To die. When I was 18, I wrote down

  The river though I couldn’t win

  A race, climbed a tree that winter, then

  Fell, flat on my wet, red face. Line

  After line, I read all the time,

  But “there was nothing I could do

  About Race.”

  ’N’em

  They said to say goodnight

  And not goodbye, unplugged

  The TV when it rained. They hid

 

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