by L. A. Witt
I withdrew my fingers and put some more lube on the condom just to be sure. Then I guided myself to him, my head spinning with anticipation.
“Remember what I said.” I pressed the head of my cock against him. “We can stop any time.” I leaned in a little, and his whole body tensed. “Relax,” I whispered, running my free hand up and down his back. “I won’t hurt you. I promise.”
Troy’s shoulders rose as he took in a deep breath, and as he let it out, his body started to relax. I pressed a little harder—not so hard I’d force my way in, but hard enough that all he had to do was push back, and I’d be inside him.
He took another breath. Let it out.
I was just about to suggest changing position, or relaxing some more, or…or something, but then he exhaled. All the tension in his shoulders was suddenly gone.
And even that didn’t prepare me for him to suddenly take me.
I gasped, shivering as the head of my cock went from against him to inside him. My ability to speak vanished along with my breath and my awareness of anything besides that mind-blowing point of contact.
Troy exhaled.
For several long seconds, neither of us moved. Partly, I wanted to give him a chance to get used to me. And hell, so I could get used to him. To the fact that I was finally inside him.
Then he moved. He rocked forward and back, and I stayed still. Perfectly still. It was an exercise in restraint, not letting my hips move in time with his, but I wanted him to be in control, so I stayed as still as possible.
He took me little by little, and just the sight of my cock sliding deeper into him was enough to make my head spin. Holding my breath, I watched him move, watching him fuck himself on me, watched him take every inch, the muscles in his back and shoulders rippling with every motion.
He groaned, letting his head fall forward, and I cautiously gave in to the need to move, fucking him slowly.
I ran my hands up his back and grasped his shoulders. “You all right?”
Troy nodded.
“That feel good?” I asked.
“So good.” He groaned again, his arms trembling under him as he struggled to hold himself up.
I leaned down and wrapped my arm around him. Burying my face against his neck. I murmured, “You feel so good, Troy.”
He whimpered, still rocking back against me, and it was impossible to say who was in charge now, who was controlling these slow, fluid strokes. Not that it mattered. Nothing did. Nothing in the world existed. There was nothing at all except this slick, tight point of contact and the mind-blowing sensation of sliding in and out of him.
“Harder,” he begged.
“Harder?” I kissed the back of his shoulder and moved even slower, letting each stroke take forever. “Maybe I want—”
“Please.” He clawed at the edge of the mattress, struggling to move his hips as I pushed back in. “Fuck me harder.”
“Shh.” I kissed the side of his neck and murmured in his ear. “I will. But I swear if I…” I pressed my lips just behind his ear. “If I move any faster, I’ll come. And I don’t want this to be over.”
Troy’s fists tightened on the mattress, and he arched against me. “Oh God…”
“You okay?”
He nodded. “You feel good.”
I kissed the back of his shoulder. “Good. Because I could do this all night,” I breathed. “God, you feel amazing and you look incredible.”
Troy moaned. “Fuck…”
I pushed all the way inside him and stopped. “Go all the way down. Onto your stomach.”
He didn’t resist and sank down to the bed. I rested my weight on my knees and forearms but let my chest and abs pressed against his back. I only moved my hips, sliding in and out of him but not breaking any contact unless I absolutely had to. This was my favorite way to feel a man—skin to skin nearly from head to toe, one of us all the way inside the other, moving slowly and breathing in the scent of his skin.
And holding Troy this way, kissing his neck and shoulder while I covered him with my body and moved in him, drove me insane. I knew damn well I had no business being this close to him, not when I was here for the sole purpose of protecting him, but the fierce sense of protectiveness just spurred me on, made me hold him tighter, as if I could shield him from the world with my body at the same time I made us both feel good.
He shifted a little to the side and turned his head as far as he could. I leaned forward and found his lips with mine, and holy fuck, his kiss took this from amazing to absolutely mind-blowing.
I didn’t care about orgasms. His. Mine. Whatever. If we came, we came. All I cared about was fucking him. Moving inside him. Being over him, arms around him, tasting his kiss and feeling his hot skin against mine. Even with the layer of latex between us, he felt amazing, fucking amazing, and I lost myself completely in fucking him and breathing him in.
He didn’t just feel good. He felt incredible. Our bodies fit together perfectly, and every thrust drove the most delicious whimpers and moans out of him, and it was too much. Too intense, too perfect, too fucking amazing to be real.
“I’m gonna come,” I murmured. “Fuck, Troy, you feel so…you feel…” If I’d had a steady rhythm, it was gone now, and my body moved with no conscious thought on my part, driving my cock deeper and harder inside him as the room spun around me and my vision blurred, and suddenly, I was there. All the way inside him, every muscle in my body tensing at once, my balls tight and my breath lodged in my throat, and I was sure my orgasm would never stop.
“Fuck,” I breathed, slumping over him. I buried my face against his neck. “Fuck. Oh fuck…” My whole body trembled with the force of my orgasm, and I kept slamming against him, trying to drive myself deeper and keep coming and coming and…
Eventually, though, it subsided, and I had just enough conscious thought left to hold myself up instead of dropping my full weight on him. “That,” I murmured against his neck, “was awesome.”
“Mmhmm.” He laughed. “Told you I might not come, though.”
“Who said we were done?” I carefully pulled out. As I stripped off the condom, I panted, “Get on your back.” I tossed it in the trash beside the bed, and when I turned around again, he was on his back, flushed and sweaty and completely hard.
I got up to get rid of the condom. When I came back to his bed, I gathered him in my arms and kissed him. As I slid my hand between us, I whispered, “You don’t have to come, but I’ll keep going until you want me to stop.” I wrapped my fingers around his fully erect cock. “Do you want me to stop?”
“God, no.” His fingers dug into my shoulders. “Don’t stop.”
“I won’t. I promise.” I pressed my lips to his and stroked his cock. “As long as you feel good, we don’t have to stop.”
“It…it definitely feels good.”
“Then I won’t stop.” I kissed him and kept teasing him.
His fingers raked through my too-short hair, twitching as they tried to grab on. “It feels really good. Just d-don’t know if I can come like that.”
Still stroking him, I met his eyes over his quivering abs and bare chest. “Do you enjoy it?”
“Ooh, yeah.” He moistened his lips. “I just don’t know if—”
“If you enjoy it, then I want to do it.” Eyes locked on his, I ran the tip of my finger along the underside of his cock. He bit his lip, and I grinned. “Just tell me if you want me to stop, but as long as you’re enjoying it…”
“I so am.”
He didn’t have to come. I’d have done this all damned night for no other reason than I loved it. I loved the way he felt and sounded and tasted, and I fucking loved making his breath catch like that and making his whole body arch and tremble.
He moaned, and the sound echoed off all my nerve endings. Nothing in the entire world was as erotic as Troy falling apart, as
his whole body trembling while he made those deliciously helpless sounds and his cock seemed to thicken in my hand.
With every breath, I expected him to pull back, to tell me to stop, but the tension just kept building, and he just kept riding that edge. Tense as his body was beside me, he had to be on the edge, had to be right on the brink, a heartbeat away from either letting go or giving up.
His body went rigid. Groaning, he thrust into my fist, and I gave him everything I had. Then his breath caught, and he managed a sharp whisper of, “Oh…shit…”
And a second later, he forced his dick through my tight grip, and his semen shot up my arm and across my stomach. I kept stroking as long as he kept coming, and Jesus, his orgasm seemed to go on forever, his whole body trembling as he gasped and swore and moaned.
Finally, he collapsed back onto the bed, still shaking and panting. “Oh my God.”
I kissed him lightly. “Well, I’m not God, but—”
He burst out laughing. “No, you’re a dork.”
“Eh, I’ve been called worse.”
Our eyes met, and we both laughed. Shaking his head, he reached for the tissues on the nightstand, and handed me a few. After we’d cleaned ourselves off, we settled back into bed. Troy sank back onto the pillows and stared up at the ceiling. When I held on to him, he rested his head against my shoulder, and I stroked his hair.
“I can’t believe you got me off,” he slurred.
“Was I that bad?”
He snorted. “Yeah. That’s it.”
I kissed the top of his head. “Say the word, and I’ll do it again. As long as you enjoy it, there’s no pressure from me.”
“Thank you,” he whispered.
“You shouldn’t feel any pressure in bed. That’s…God, that’s just bullshit.”
“I know.” He sighed heavily. “Everything about my relationship with Ben was messed up, but the sex was the worst.”
I was afraid to ask but did. “In what way?”
“It was always consensual. He just…he made it so stressful I couldn’t enjoy it. If I came before him, then he’d flip out at me for getting myself off before getting him off. And if it took too long for me to come, he’d freak out over that too.”
“What? Why?”
“Because he’d already gotten off and wanted to go to sleep. So he’d tell me to take care of it myself, roll over, and knock out.” He laughed bitterly. “The one time I took him up on that, I regretted it for days.”
“What do you mean?”
Troy shuddered.
“Never mind,” I said quickly. “You don’t have to spell it out.”
“Thanks. Anyway, it got to the point I couldn’t come at all during sex. Fooling around, yeah, but once he wanted anal? Not a chance. Sometimes I couldn’t even get…” He hesitated. “I couldn’t even get it up. And that would just piss him off even more.”
“God, what a volatile douche bag.”
“Tell me about it.” He lifted his head and scowled. “Look what he did to you. He’s never exactly been a stable individual.”
I whistled. “That’s an understatement.”
“Yeah.” He propped himself up on his arm. “So, yeah. There’s my fucked-up history. I know you like guys with more experience. The last thing most guys want is someone with all this baggage tangled up with—”
I kissed him to cut him off. “Do you think I’d be here if I didn’t want to be?”
Troy held my gaze, and I swore I could see the question in his eyes.
What happens after tonight?
“Let me ask you this.” I brushed a few strands of hair off his forehead. “When we’re…well, when we’re in bed, do you think about the fact that I’m your bodyguard? Or that I’m older than you?”
“No.”
“Neither do I. When we’re like this, all I can think about is how good it feels, and how good I want it to feel for you.” I kissed him tenderly. “Nothing else exists. Not your past, not any baggage either of us might have, and not anything that’s going on outside this room.”
“So what happens when we do leave this room?”
I exhaled. “I have no idea.”
Chapter Fifteen
I tossed and turned the whole damned night. There was no point in telling myself that Troy and I had been idiots, so I didn’t bother. I just couldn’t stop thinking about everything we’d done in his bed. Right or wrong, stupid or not, I wanted more. I didn’t know what I was hoping for the most—that Troy would be the smart one who’d see reason and put a stop to this, or that he’d be reckless just like me. Based on everything I’d come to understand about him since I became his bodyguard, I suspected the latter.
Dear God, we are so fucking doomed.
This wasn’t the first time I’d gotten involved with someone I shouldn’t have, but an admiral’s kid? That was exceptionally stupid. Especially given my duties.
Max went to class with Troy for the next two days, which was a double-edged sword. It put some distance between Troy and me, gave us both a chance to calm down and see reason. At the same time, it gave me plenty of opportunity to be insanely distracted by how much I wanted—needed—to see him right fucking now.
But the deal was that Max and I would trade off escorting Troy to class, and today? My turn.
My stomach was all tied up in knots, and it only got worse when Troy came down the stairs to the foyer where I waited for him. Even worse when he smiled. Really smiled. Hell, I barely even noticed the omnipresent dog plodding along beside him.
“Thank God.” He stepped off the last step, so he was a few inches below eye level. “I thought I was going to have to sit through another day with Fowler.”
I laughed. “That bad?”
Rolling his eyes, Troy groaned. “He’s just…such a fucking chief.”
I snorted. “Enough said, trust me.”
He met my gaze, and the playful grin weakened my knees. “He did give you all the lecture notes, though, right?”
“Yeah. And you’re right, he is such a chief.” I snickered. “I swear he wrote down every word the prof said.”
“God forbid a chief do anything efficiently.”
“Right?”
We both chuckled, and then he gestured at the door.
“So.” He raised his pierced eyebrows. “To class?”
“After you.”
We made it out to the car, and I drove us out toward the interstate. As I was pulling up the on ramp, Troy said, “So, um. The other night.”
I gripped the wheel tighter. “Yeah.”
“Any point in bothering with talking about why we shouldn’t have done it?”
“I’m pretty sure that dead horse has been soundly beaten.”
“Ya think?”
“Yeah.”
Silence. Taut, uneasy silence.
I merged onto the interstate and tapped my thumbs on the wheel as I tried to focus on the road and not Troy.
He cleared his throat. “So since we’re not going to harp on why we shouldn’t, I think we should.”
“We should—” I glanced at him, eyes wide. “I beg your pardon?”
“You liked it, right?”
“God, yeah.”
“So did I. And, uh…” He shifted in the seat. “I want to do it again.”
I held on to that steering wheel for dear fucking life. “You do realize you just guaranteed it’s going to be impossible to concentrate in class today, right?”
“Then let’s not go.”
“Huh?”
“You know,” he said, sliding a hand over my leg, “missing one lecture won’t kill us.”
I glanced at him again. “Are you…”
“Yes. I’m suggesting we cut class and go fuck.”
My whole body tensed so hard I almost hit the brakes. “
Shit.” I glanced at him, eyebrows up. Christ, but he could be bold when he wanted to be. “Uh, doesn’t this mean you’re contributing to my delinquency?”
“I’ll make it worth your while.”
Oh my God.
Fuck it. No way I was concentrating in class now.
“If we go back to your dad’s place, we’re going to get some attention.” I gnawed my lip. “I don’t think anyone will notice if we go back to mine.”
His fingers twitched on my leg. “How far is it from here?”
Too far. Way too far.
I slid my hand over the top of his. “Fifteen minutes. Tops.”
Troy’s grin sent a jolt of pure sexual electricity right through me. “Go.”
He didn’t have to tell me twice.
Thank God, my brain checked back in just before I turned into my parking lot, and I regained enough presence of mind to circle the block a few times and make sure nobody was following me. With a lunatic out there who apparently didn’t like the idea of someone getting involved with Troy, I couldn’t be too careful.
Which was yet another reason I had no business getting involved with Troy. As if I needed any more. Except I also couldn’t get away from him without leaving him vulnerable. And I couldn’t stay close to him without possibly provoking his stalker.
I took a dozen random turns, doubling back and circling around until I was absolutely sure no one was tailing us.
No one followed us down the last two side streets, and there wasn’t a car in sight when I pulled into the parking lot. I parked around behind the building in my usual spot, which wasn’t visible from the road, and still scanned our surroundings in the mirrors before I killed the engine.
I entered the code on the security door, held it open, and after Troy had gone in, I scanned the parking lot once more. Then I let the heavy door fall shut behind me, the lock clanging into place, and continued up the stairs behind Troy.
In my apartment, I turned the dead bolt and slid the chain into place.
And then we faced each other.
I wrapped my arms around him and went in for a kiss, but he stopped me. “We both know what this is,” he murmured. “Let’s take it in the bedroom where it belongs before we get carried away right here.”