Taming Chaos

by Lynne St. James

  Taming Chaos

  Number I of Raining Chaos

  Lynne St. James

  JK Publishing, Inc. (2014)

  *

  Tags: Contemporary, Erotic, Rockers, New Age

  Warning: For Mature Adult Audiences. Contains language and actions some may deem offensive. MF

  In book one of Raining Chaos: From foster care to the Garden, Raining Chaos makes their debut. They learn fame and fortune comes with a price; it’s all in how you deal with it that makes the journey worthwhile.

  Chaos is told by the record company that what got them to the top is no longer cutting it so they’re sending a songwriter. Yeah, that goes over well…not…until she shows up. Their chemistry is off the charts, however, for a commitment phobia guy, does Chaos really want to take the chance with his and the band’s future.

  Cynda makes a promise and fulfilling it could cost her more than she ever expected. Rock stars can’t be trusted, she knows, she lived with it all her life. When she shows up to meet the band, it all changes when she’s drawn to everything she vowed would never be in her future. But as Cynda feels the pull toward Chaos and joins them on the road, she realizes the cost of loving a rock star is huge. A simple job and promise will change her life, now she needs to figure out whether it would be for better or worse.

  Jump on the bus as Raining Chaos sets out on their tour and join them to see if making music soothes the soul or breaks the heart.

  Taming Chaos

  Raining Chaos

  Book One

  by Lynne St. James

  © Copyright August 2014 JK Publishing, Inc.

  ISBN#

  All cover art and logo © Copyright August 2014 by JK Publishing, Inc.

  All rights reserved.

  Edited by S. M. Kisling

  Artwork by Jess Buffett

  Published by JK Publishing, Inc.

  Smashwords Edition, License Notes

  This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you are reading this book and did not purchase it or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com, and purchase your own copy.

  Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, places, characters and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, organizations, events or locales are entirely coincidental.

  No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author and publishing company.

  Dedication

  I want to thank all of my readers. Your support makes this so easy. This book was a total change for me and I had some great support while writing it, but there are few who went over and above. Teresa Childress, Caitlyn O’Leary, Avery Gale, Debra Fisk, Michelle Hill, and Jana Leigh, I can’t thank you all enough.

  A big thank you to my girls, Jackie and Sarah, who are always just a text or phone call away for a pep talk, a beta read, and lots of giggles.

  I saved the most important for last. Tom, you are the best. Thank you for all the late nights, gallons of coffee, brainstorming and being the best research partner ever. You rock my world! I love you.

  Remember…You don’t get old you just keep rocking!!!

  Table of Contents

  Dedication

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Epilogue

  Books by Lynne St. James

  Excerpt from Sharing Freedom

  Excerpt from Bed of Roses

  Excerpt from Big Dog

  JK Publishing, Inc.

  Chapter One

  Chaos

  “Fucking cocksuckers!” I can’t believe Rod would let them do this to us…to me. “The fucking scumbags want to send a writer to help me write our songs?”

  “Who the fuck wants to do what?” Wrath asked. I looked up from reading the text to see him grab a beer from the mini-fridge and drop onto the couch.

  “Our fucking manager is letting the record company hire a songwriter for the new album. They don’t think my songs are good enough.” Each word I read pissed me off more. Who the hell were they to tell me my lyrics weren’t good enough. Standing, the anger radiated through me, and the desire to punch something was overwhelming. Tossing the phone on the table, I slammed my fist through the wall. Shit. Okay, maybe that wasn’t the best idea I’d had all day, but we could afford the damage. I didn’t know if it was the stress from the tour or what, but lately I’d lost patience with everything. Two months ago I would have been fuckin’ pissed but not to the point of putting my fist through the wall.

  Looking down at my scraped knuckles, I wanted to laugh. I’d done so much worse to myself over the years, but this was just stupid. “We should’ve never signed the fucking contract. All you ever hear is how record companies fuck you over.”

  “Will you fucking tell me what’s going on already? Or do I have to beat it out of you?” Wrath growled at me.

  Turning from the hole in the wall they were all there, the band—my family—looking at me like I’d grown a second head. Not surprising since I’ve always been the most levelheaded of the group, but this just fucking sucked. It was our sound, our stories. I sighed as I jammed the cell in my jeans, knowing I had ‘pissed off’ written all over my face. They waited to see what was coming next, curiosity and concern in their eyes and on Rage’s face—anger. His name fuckin’ nailed his personality to a ‘T’.

  I don’t know when I became the ‘leader’ of the band and our little family. One day I just realized it had happened, and sometimes, like today, the responsibility was just too fuckin’ much. “Symmetry doesn’t think my songs are good enough for Blown Away. They contacted Rod and he texted to let me know they hired a songwriter and he’s coming over to meet us today.”

  Looking down at my hand resting on the edge of the table, I watched blood seep from the scrapes. Grabbing a towel, I wrapped it around my knuckles. Rehearsal was gonna suck later but oh fucking well.

  Rage was the first to object, but no surprise there. “They didn’t have a problem with the fucking songs when we went triple platinum in a month with the first one.”

  “Nope, they didn’t, but now they think they know what our fans want in music better than we do.”

  Fury grabbed some beers and tossed them around the room, offering one to me, but I shook my head. I needed more than beer, I was too pissed off and I didn’t give a shit if it was only eleven a.m. “Nah, I’m thinking scotch if they stocked it for us.”

  Fury started to get up but Sweets pushed him down. “I’ll get it for you. No worries.”

  “Tha
nks.” Sweets was like a little sister to me but lately things with her had gotten a little strange. She and her sister are the backup singers for Raining Chaos. They’d come to live at the Sherman’s after the rest of us had already been there for a while, but we’d all gotten along great. When we’d started the band they’d wanted to help so we let them sing backup, and they’ve been part of the band ever since.

  It hadn’t been easy in the beginning. We’d traveled around in a fucked up van for five long years—tons of crappy food and showering in truck stops, but it had finally paid off. The gig at the Leaky Keg in Boston changed everything. There were still lots of times I couldn’t fucking believe we’d made it this far. Five guys from the foster system—and now here we were, starting our first worldwide tour and working on our second album. What a fuckin’ trip, which is the only reason I’m not going to kick Rod’s ass when he gets here.

  “So what did you tell Rod, bro?” Flame asked as he grabbed another beer.

  I shrugged my shoulders as I watched Sweets look for the scotch. I hoped they’d put some in here for us. She pulled the bottle out of a cabinet and held up a glass but I shook my head, the bottle would work just fine. We had the show later but I’d have time to sober up, besides my hand was starting to throb and swell, the alcohol would numb it and hopefully my anger too.

  “Yo?” Wrath tossed a pillow at me but it went wide and hit the wall, then slid to the floor.

  “You missed, mother fucker,” I laughed. “I wanted to tell him to let them know we said they could go fuck themselves but he made it pretty clear we didn’t have a choice. Fucking contracts.”

  “Goddamn it. We want to play our own music, Chaos. It’s been good enough so far,” Fury said, his voice full of anger.

  “I agree, so we’re just going to have to figure out a way to make sure the writer agrees with us. I’m hoping whoever they sent has at least heard our shit and we can convince him to go back and tell them the music is great. Or maybe we could get the girls to be extra nice to him.” Seeing the looks on their faces told me they didn’t get the joke.

  “Holy fuck. I was just joking. You don’t actually think I’d pimp you out do you?”

  Candy shook her head but Sweets still had a weird expression on her face. I was going to have to talk to her soon and find out what was going on with her. She’d always been on the moody side but this was getting fuckin’ ridiculous.

  “Do we all agree then? We’ll do what we need to do to get the writer to go along with our songs?”

  “Yeah,” echoed around the room from each of them. I thought we could be pretty persuasive if we needed to be, with any luck he’d be a fan.

  “Rod also said he sent us an email with the tour schedule—at least the first part of it. I still can’t fuckin’ believe we’re opening for Avenged Sevenfold at the Garden. Tonight will be the last small club we’ll play at for a long time, hell, maybe ever, so let’s give them something to remember. Besides, Jack and Sally are coming too.”

  Lifting the bottle of scotch I took a long drink. The sting of the liquor as it burned its way down my throat felt good. I didn’t drink a lot but sometimes it was the only way to keep my sanity, and chase away the demons when they get too close.

  The buzz of another text message interrupted my thoughts. Rod again. He sure could live up to his name; he was a real fuckin’ dick when he wanted to be. I was starting to wonder if he was doing his best for us. Lately it seemed a lot like he was just in it for the money. The songwriter wasn’t the first thing he’d caved in on to the record company.

  Rod: We’ll be there in fifteen. Try to behave.

  Fuck you. Behave? Really. Who are you my friggin’ father? “Looks like we’re getting company soon. Rod and the writer are on their way. He wants us to behave.”

  The guys howled with laughter. Oh yeah, Rod was in for a rude awakening if he thought we’d behave because he told us to. So much for getting my drunk on. I’d have to put it off until after the gig tonight. I needed to make sure we handled this right or it’d be a huge clusterfuck. No way were we going to record the new album unless we wrote the songs.

  I screwed the cap on the bottle and shoved it into the drawer of my dressing table before popping a breath mint. I didn’t need a lecture from Rod about drinking so early either. All of us had learned a long time ago how to hold our booze, the only one we ever worried about was Rage. His anger would kill him some day if he didn’t get help, but none of us had been able to convince him of that yet.

  Sitting there I watched my bros, the only real family I had, well them and Jack and Sally Sherman who’d taken us all in when we had no place else. I always watched and listened, it was how I got the ideas for our songs. Catching people in unguarded moments, they’d let some stray thought escape and it would trigger a song in my head. I knew our songs were good, and not just because I wrote them, they had meaning that kicked us in the gut. It’s what our fans want, not some shit music they played on the radio. Who the fuck listened to the radio anymore anyway?

  Fury and Flame were trying to teach the girls how to play poker. It was taking them awhile to catch on but it was funny to watch. I just knew one of these days they’d turn around and clean us all out. I was just waiting for the day. Fury looked up and winked at me when he caught me watching. “I think you better hold off on the stripping until after rehearsal. It’ll only get out of hand.”

  “Whatever,” Flame said as he flipped me the bird.

  Sweets blew a kiss to me and winked before leaning down low enough to make sure I’d see her cleavage. What the fuck was that? I shook my head, I just didn’t get it. She was like a little sister to me, both her and Candy. No way would I touch that. None of us would, we were their protectors not their boyfriends.

  Hearing Rod’s voice echoing in the hallway had the effect of a wet blanket on all of us triggering instant quiet. It was like being caught by the teacher doing something you weren’t supposed to. I shrugged, and tried to look reassuring. It was what it was, and we’d figure it out—sounded like a good story but even I didn’t really believe it. The scotch burned in the pit of my stomach as I braced myself for the trouble walking through the dressing room door.

  I was already tense, but I about shit when Rod walked in with a woman, actually she looked more like a little girl, hiding behind bangs and big glasses. What the fuck? How could they think she’d be able to write our songs?

  Chapter Two

  Cynda

  Rod Dixon was an asshole, or maybe it’s all agents? I wonder if they give them asshole cards when they got their first job. Hiding my grin, I pushed my hair behind my ears and rubbed my sweaty palms on my jeans. I can’t believe I actually got this job—writing songs for Raining Chaos. Holy shit. Their first album was huge, so finding out Mr. Warner wanted me to help them with the second one was a big surprise. He’d said Chaos wasn’t getting ‘it’ this time and it was my job to fix it. What could I say to that? I wasn’t sure I believed him after hearing some of the songs, but it was a job and I had to do it.

  They were leaving on tour in a couple of days so after this meeting I’d be on my own with the songs. At least that’s the plan, which is exactly what I wanted to happen. The further I stayed away from self-centered rockers the happier I’d be.

  For the millionth time since her death, I wished mom hadn’t made me promise to try to do something with my talent. She knew how much I resented this world, but I’d promised and I wouldn’t break it. I could handle this for a while, right? Ugh. What was dickman saying? Shit, he’s opening the door. Get a grip, girl, they’re only musicians. Just a group of guys who got lucky, I don’t have to like them, only do the job.

  Taking a deep breath, I tried to calm my racing heart. I really needed to work on this freak out thing if I was going to do this job. I’d be meeting rock stars all the time. Raining Chaos was just another rock band, so what if every song resonated in me like Chaos was singing about my life. I couldn’t let it affect me, they’re just a bunch
of drugged out rockers.

  “Hey, guys, I’d like you to meet Cynda Pearson. She’s the songwriter from Symmetry Records.”

  I walked around Rod and into a room filled with cigarette smoke and the smell of beer, and looked into the hypnotic hazel eyes of the lead singer and songwriter for Raining Chaos—Chaos. Oh shit. He’s even more gorgeous in person. Seeing him this close was like a dream. I should’ve been teaching a kindergarten class right now, not standing in a rock band’s dressing room. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. The grey streak in his long black hair was even sexier in person, and I wanted to run my hands through and see if it was as soft as it looked. No one knew whether the streak was real or dyed. He’d never answered the question, and I wondered if I’d be able to figure it out if I touched it.

  He was sitting at one of the tables so I couldn’t see much of his body, but what I did see was hotter than hell. His black t-shirt strained against his shoulders and chest and I was betting he had a six-pack under there. Realizing I was staring at his chest, I felt the heat in my cheeks, a sure sign I was probably red as anything. As I slid my gaze back up to his face our eyes met. He looked kind of surprised actually, and I wondered why. I tried to look away but I was drawn to him.

  Now I wasn’t only nervous, I was blushing and trying not to puke my breakfast, but I gulped down too much air and started choking. Way to make an entrance, Cyn…good one. Michelle would be getting a kick out of this if she were here. Mr. Dickman was asking me if I’m okay. Shit, really. I shook my head and took a couple of deep breaths, and thank God it helped to stop the coughing. Of course now my voice was all rough and I was sure my cheeks were bright red. As mortifying as it is, it probably wouldn’t matter anyway. I doubted they’d remember me as soon as I walked out the door, and if I was lucky I’d never see them again except in my album list on my iPad.