by Cait Marie
“Lila,” he whispered. The use of her first name sent a shiver down her spine, and as if he knew what she thought, he rubbed a hand down her back. “Can we please just enjoy this for a minute?”
She wanted to. God, did she want to. But a thousand thoughts swirled through her mind as she stared at the wall. A beam of light streamed in from the corner of the window where he hadn’t pulled the curtain all the way shut. Her head throbbed with the brightness. She turned her attention to the digital clock beside the bed, counting the seconds as she waited for the numbers to change. They had an hour before they needed to check out. She had to pack, and they would probably need to eat before getting back on the road.
“Stop thinking so hard,” Gavin said, drawing her out of her own head.
“I…”
Gavin’s arms loosened around her with a sigh, and she shifted away. He turned on his side to face her. They were still too close. She could count his eyelashes, if she dared to look that close. He slowly reached out and trailed a finger down her cheek. She held her breath.
“I know you.” His smile warmed her heart.
Lila didn’t want to leave that moment, despite how anxious he made her. She wanted it to be real, and that’s what scared her the most. She hated that she’d pulled away from him, but it was necessary.
He rested his palm against the side of her face. “It’s okay. Breathe.”
A shaky breath passed her lips. She tried to think of something to say—anything to convey how she felt. She needed to tell him the truth.
“Why did you push me away?”
Gavin’s quiet words caught her off guard, and Lila's heart stopped. She knew he would bring it up at some point, but she’d hoped to get through the trip before it happened. Pushing herself to sit against the headboard, she reached over to check her phone. She had one text from her mom, asking her to be safe on their way home, and one from Beth Ann, asking for all the juicy details that didn’t exist.
“Weston, I’m sick of this.” He sat up beside her, lowering her phone to her lap. “Please just talk to me.”
She swallowed past the tightness threatening to close her throat. For seven years, she’d waited for those words. She’d only ever wanted him to show he cared and ask, but that didn’t make it easier. If anything, the years apart made it worse. Not because she was still hurt—that had passed a long time ago—but because she knew that it was too late. If they made up, it would only hurt worse when they inevitably parted ways. With a sigh, she asked, “Do you remember our eleventh birthday party?”
“Vaguely,” he said. “I know that’s the last birthday party we shared. I went to stay with Aunt Sharon for a couple weeks, and by the time I came back, you wanted nothing to do with me.”
Flashes of that summer flooded her mind. The laughter and betrayal that seemed like the end of the world at that age. The truth was his words didn’t hurt for long. It was childish, even she knew that. She would have forgiven him.
What broke their friendship was his inability to apologize or even acknowledge it. He never tried to figure out what was wrong. Instead of fighting for their friendship, he began teasing her every opportunity he had. Then the arguing started.
But what if he hadn’t apologized because he truly never knew?
“I went inside to get your birthday present,” she said as she stood, moved to the window, and slid the curtain to the side. “I saved up my money for months and months, doing extra chores, to get us Cubs tickets. When I came back downstairs, you were surrounded by your baseball team. You were all laughing, and I snuck up behind to surprise you.”
Staring out at the city she’d dreamed of for so long, she tucked a piece of hair back before rubbing at her temple. She didn’t want to have that conversation. At the end, another waited for her. One she wasn’t ready for.
“What did you overhear?”
She turned to face him. “Your friends making fun of me. You joined in and said you only hung out with me because your parents made you. That you hated it—hated me.”
He stared at her, regret filling his eyes. “I didn’t mean any of that. It just wasn’t cool to have a girl best friend.”
Lila looked away. “I get that. Really, I do. My heart was broken though. I thought when you came back from your aunt’s, you’d apologize and things would go back to normal, but they didn’t. Everything escalated from there.”
“I didn’t know you heard me.” Gavin got out of the bed and took cautious steps toward her. He stopped a few feet away. “I didn’t know I needed to apologize because I didn’t know why you were upset.”
“But you didn’t even try to find out. You just started teasing me.”
He let out a soft laugh. “I was eleven.”
“Yes, but a few years later, I heard you again. You were talking to Kyle with the rest of the team at the homecoming dance. You told him to stay away from me because I wasn’t worth the trouble—that I was awful. How many other guys did you tell that to? Is that why I have ‘go on a date’ on a stupid bucket list?”
Fighting back tears, she crossed her arms.
Gavin rubbed the back of his neck. “All of them.”
She stared at him in confusion. “What?”
“I warned them all to stay away from you, but I didn’t think they’d all listen to me…”
Her mouth dropped open. The truth threatened to tear her heart open again. “Did you really hate me that much?”
His arm fell to his side as his shoulders curved in defeat. “I never hated you.”
“Then why would you do that?” she asked, holding her hands out to the side. She was done with games.
“Because I couldn’t stand the thought of you being with anyone else!” He stormed across the remaining space, closing the distance between them. His voice dropped as he said, “Because I’ve been in love with you my entire life, Lila.”
The world stilled around them. The faint noises from the busy city beyond their room faded. Lila’s heart pounded behind her ribs. The overwhelming truth hurt. The years of torment and agony. It was a lie—all of it was a lie. He never hated her. She stared up at him, blinking through tears.
None of that mattered. Not as her breath returned to her lungs. Not when he took one final step closer. She saw it in his eyes—the love. The longing. The look she’d brushed off all week.
His hand slid to the back of her neck, and he leaned down, pausing millimeters from her. She knew he wouldn’t do it. It had to be her. She needed to forgive him and move on. A whole world existed outside of their bubble, but for the first time in too long, she ignored it. She ignored everything waiting for her at home. She ignored the guilt of not telling him the truth that threatened to ruin the moment.
Instead, Lila twisted her arms up behind his neck and met his soft lips with hers.
Gavin had waited years for that kiss, and it surpassed all his expectations. Years of tension poured through them while he held her tight. A soft gasp left Lila’s lips as they parted to let him in. His fingers explored the soft skin along the bottom of her back beneath the hem of her shirt.
“Lila,” he whispered as he pulled away enough to look down at her. Her smile just about did him in. They needed to slow down. He needed out of that private hotel room with her.
His phone buzzed behind him, breaking the intensity of the moment. It continued going off, and he wondered who would call so early. He reluctantly let go. “I should check who that is.”
She nodded. “I’m going to change. And look for some ibuprofen...”
“Front pocket of my bag.” He leaned down before she could walk away and kissed her one more time then moved to the bedside table.
His phone stopped vibrating, and his mom’s face disappeared from the screen as soon as he picked it up. She’d called three times. With a sigh, he tapped her name to call her back and told Lila who it was as she headed into the bathroom with a pile of clothes.
“You’d better have a good reason for not answering me,” his m
om said in lieu of a greeting.
“Good morning, Mom.” He yawned and sat on the edge of the bed.
“Good morning.” Her soft laugh barely made it through the line. “How’s the trip? You’re not corrupting Lila too much, are you?”
Images of a drunk Lila dancing in the bar and failing to change into pajamas flashed in his mind. Helping her with her shorts… he shook his head. “No, of course not.”
“Mhmm. Are you having fun?”
“Yeah, we’re having a great time.”
A beat of silence. “Wow, that actually sounded sincere and not sarcastic.”
He laughed. “I’m serious. We um… finally talked.”
“Gavin Thomas, what did I tell you? This wasn’t supposed to be that kind of trip.”
“No, Mom, we were just now talking when you called.” He sighed. Quieter he said, “Nothing happened. Well…”
“Gavin—”
“I’m kidding. Nothing like that, promise. We did talk about why the arguing started though.”
The bathroom door opened, and his heart pounded as Lila walked out tying the end of her braided hair. His mom told him she was glad they finally had that conversation, but he had a hard time concentrating on her words.
“Yeah, everything is good now,” he said. Lila met his gaze with a smile that could light up the entire city.
“Gavin.” Amused irritation coated his mom’s voice.
“What?”
“I asked if you were coming home right after checking out.”
He grinned at Lila. “No, we have a couple more things to do in the city before heading back.”
12
Sunday
“Where are we going?” Lila asked.
Gavin squeezed her fingers. Walking down the path hand in hand probably should have felt strange or foreign, but it didn’t. They’d stopped at a little diner for breakfast and talked about nothing and everything for far longer than it took to eat their French toast. He told her about going to Maslair University and his plans of getting into the sports medicine program. They talked about their favorite shows and bands, regular customers at the Scoop, and laughed through stories of his cousins. It was as if the past seven years weren’t spent fighting.
He didn’t ask about Bennu or the need to complete the bucket list within two weeks. One serious conversation was plenty for that morning. He’d wait until the end of the following week when they finished the list, and if she didn’t tell him on her own, he’d bring it up again. For the moment, things were good between them. He’d wanted her back in his life for too long; he wasn’t going to ruin it. When the time came, he would ask. And that time he would keep his cool. He couldn’t risk losing her. Not again.
Birds chirped around them as they wound through the trees along the gravel pathway, but the skies above darkened. They wouldn’t have a lot of time before the rain began.
He’d handed her a sleep mask in the car to wear until they parked so she wouldn’t see the signs. He hadn’t let her remove it until they reached the path. As they got closer, he could hear the commotion ahead. He knew she wouldn’t recognize the sounds though.
Around a bend in the path, the entry came into view. Large painted letters on the archway gave away their destination before they could even see the people. Lila’s steps quickened. She nearly skipped the rest of the way, and Gavin laughed as he let go of her hand to drape an arm across her shoulders. He tugged her close and kissed the side of her head as they approached.
After paying their way in, they received their equipment. They pulled on the vests and goggles and then picked up their paint guns. The place was huge. Handfuls of people ran around, but they’d only be against each other.
“Ready?” Gavin asked.
Lila blew a piece of hair from her face that had fallen from the braid and lifted her gun up with a raised brow. “Bring it.”
“Count to ten, and it’s on.” He winked as he backed away. Before turning, he added, “By the way, this is totally a date.”
She smiled as she began counting, and he took off. He moved behind a wall and ran across the open space on the other side while he had a chance. Replicas of buildings in ruin filled the arena, giving it a post-apocalyptic feel. He slowed his steps to listen for signs of her following. Reaching a small cluster of buildings, he entered through a broken doorway. He checked the rooms for other players before creeping to a boarded window facing the direction he’d left Lila.
He waited and waited, but she never came. Just as he was about to go look for her, he heard a slight shuffling of the debris littering the floor. Before he could fully turn, a popping noise filled the air, and a burst of pink stung his side.
He cursed as he dove to find shelter, but he couldn’t fight the smile as he heard her laugh. Peeking out from the wall, he shot at her and missed. When he caught another hit in the shoulder, he gave up on that tactic. He jumped out and charged, firing away.
Lila’s laugh echoed off the stone walls as she ran. He followed her through the door and back into the open space. She tried to shoot over her shoulder but missed. He shot at the edge of her side, not wanting to hit her square in the back. As she turned down a narrow alley, she jumped over a large cement block, but her toes didn’t quite clear.
Gavin caught her just before she hit the ground. He tugged her up and to him while turning to lean against the wall. Both paint guns hit the ground. Lila rested against him with her brow on his chest as she tried to catch her breath. His hands tightened around her waist, drawing her in closer. Above them, heavy clouds floated across the sky.
She looked up with a grin. “I think I won.”
He brushed a piece of her hair back from her face before leaning down to capture her lips. She pushed up onto her toes to deepen the kiss. Shouts filled the air around them as people carried on, but he only cared about her. As her fingers played with the short hair at the nape of his neck, he knew she was wrong. He definitely won.
“We’re going to get paint all over your car,” Lila said as they walked back toward the parking lot.
“I am hurt that you think I wouldn’t be prepared for this.”
Before they could reach the car, the clouds opened up. Rain splattered the pavement, soaking into her shoes. Lila squealed as Gavin tugged her toward the trunk. He popped it open, pulled out a couple towels, then moved to the front seats to lay them down to sit on.
Lila moved around him to get in, but he stopped her with a hand around her stomach. Rain fell in heavy sheets, but it all faded to the background. The moment was perfect. The way he held her—looked at her. She fought the emotions threatening to overwhelm her. Her heart raced as she stared up at him, blinking through the wetness, not sure if it was rain or tears.
His sweet smile sent butterflies fluttering though her. Moving in closer, he whispered, “How about we cross off one more thing from the bucket list before we go?”
She leaned back against the side of the car, reveling in his touch as his lips met hers once again.
Tomorrow. She would tell him everything tomorrow.
Lila’s Summer Bucket List
Sleep under the stars
Attend a party
Get a tattoo
Use fake ID to sing karaoke in a bar
Stand under the lights on the football field
Go on a date ❤️
Sneak out of the house
Visit the baby goat farm
Go to Chicago
Midnight swim
Spend a day in bed watching movies
Stay up to watch the sunrise
❤️ Be kissed in the rain
Run through the halls of the high school
Conquer a fear
Paintball
Try something new
Dye hair pink
Sneak into movie theater
Climb water tower
13
Monday
The cash register dinged as it popped open, and Gavin handed a woman her changed before m
oving to take the next customer’s order. A hand patted Gavin’s shoulder, and he sighed with relief when he looked over to see his mom.
“Oh, thank God!” He quickly ran to make up the next ice cream combination. “Where is Lila? She never showed up, and we’re packed.”
The busy room mirrored the full tables outside. For hours, it was nonstop, and he was by himself. His mom didn’t reply. Gavin looked around and found her at the door. As he rang up yet another customer, he saw her flip the sign to closed. She turned off the neon open sign as well.
“Mom, what’s going on?” he asked when she walked back over.
“We’re closing down for the day.”
“Where is Lila? We shouldn’t have to shut down just because she didn’t want to show up.” He hadn’t heard from her since they returned the day before. The drive home had started off fun, but the closer they got, the quieter she became. By the time they pulled up in front of his house, she wasn’t speaking. She barely said goodbye before running home. He’d texted her several times, but she didn’t respond. She was avoiding him. He just didn’t know why.
“Gavin—”
“No.” He held up a hand and moved to take the customer’s money. It didn’t make sense. They’d spent the perfect day together. Everything was finally as he had always wanted it. For her to hide from him… “I can’t believe her. This isn’t okay.”
“Gavin—”
“We’ll be fine without her though.” He wasn’t sure if the words were for his mother or himself, but he pointed to the crowd. “See, last customer for a few.”
“Gavin!” His mom’s loud, serious tone caught him off guard. She stepped closer and put a hand on his arm. “Lila is in the hospital. It’s not good; we need to go.”
The rest of her words faded. The world tilted beneath him, and he grabbed the counter to steady himself. Through the fog, he distantly heard his mother telling everyone they needed to leave because of a family emergency. They all made their way out, and she quickly put all the ice cream in the freezer and covered the toppings. She locked the front door before guiding him out the back to her car.