by Amy Lane
He looked at his mom and then back to the bathroom. The shower turned off in the silence, and it was apparent that Travis had only a minute to make up his mind.
“Mom, remember when he saved Sean’s life?”
His mother didn’t answer—she’d dropped clunkily into the cheap chair again, so Travis explained.
“So I was like, thirteen, right? Which meant David was eleven and Sean was like, what? Three? Anyway, we were going on a hike with Mom, and Debbie was being a demanding little shit, because that’s just what she was like as a kid, and suddenly we look up and we don’t see either of ’em. No Davy, no Sean, and then we see them catching up, and Davy’s got Sean on his back and Sean is wet and muddy and bawling. ’Cause the thing was, about a hundred yards back, Sean had fallen into the creek, and Davy, he was always checking up on us. We used to joke, you know? If we went on a walk, he walked twice as far, ’cause he’d always go back and check on the youngest and come back up and check on the oldest, and this time—this time it saved Sean’s life. And he was like that his whole life! Dex Williams was one wild motherfucker, but not with David there. David made sure he was sober and made sure he was throwing the right plays and checking up on his homework—”
Dex walked out right then, fully dressed and still drying his hair, and stopped, just stopped while his older brother spoke. He looked up and Travis nodded to him and just kept on talking.
“So that thing he did for you, when you needed help, that’s just my little brother. So you see, Mom may not see David in your guy, but I still see my little brother—there’s not a damned thing that’s changed.”
“Travis—” Marlene Worral looked scandalized, but Kane figured him and Dex’s mom had most likely had their last conversation, so he ignored her.
“Sorry, Mom. You may be done with him, but I’ve got a house too.” Travis nodded at Dex again. “You’re welcome to come to our house for Christmas, Davy.”
Kane’s chest started to work, because he couldn’t say no to that, but God, oh-my-fucking-God did Kane want to go home. Dex came up alongside him and squeezed his hand right there in front of his brother.
“That’s… that’s really nice of you, Trav,” he said, and Kane’s whole body went liquid in the pause, because he heard the next word before Dex even said it. “But I think we’ve put Kane through enough this year. Maybe we’ll come back in the summer sometime, okay?”
Travis nodded and grimaced, and Kane suddenly didn’t hate him as the older-brother-master-of-the-universe that he’d seen this whole time.
“Yeah, Davy. Cathy said you’d say that. She’s real smart, Cathy, but she doesn’t say much. She had you two figured the minute you walked through the door. Dad found out, and I wasn’t surprised. I didn’t think they’d kick you out.” Travis shook his head. “If I’d known they’d kick you out, I would have screened that fucking call.”
“Travis—”
“Go ahead and tell Dad,” Travis snarled to his mother. “You tell him that. You have him kick me out and see how much longer he’s got a farm.”
“Trav—” Dex said softly, and Travis shook his head.
“Yeah, I know.” To his mother he said softly, “Mom, here’s the keys. Go warm the car up. We’ll start home. You can pretend you didn’t see this next part, okay?”
But Marlene didn’t leave, and she did see Travis haul Dex into a hug that Dex returned. “Call me anytime,” Travis whispered, and Dex hugged him tighter.
“Backatcha,” he said. “Maybe talk to Kane if I’m not there.”
Travis backed away and reached out his hand. Kane took it. “Looking forward to it. C’mon, Mom.”
And Travis turned back around and Marlene followed. Neither of them had even taken off their coat. Travis opened the door, and Mrs. Worral paused for a moment.
“I thought…,” she said softly. “I thought we could talk you into coming back alone. I’m so foolish. I should have seen you were already your own family. Bye, David.”
“Bye, Mom.”
The door closed then, softly, and Kane sank to the bed in relief. “Thank God. I’m sayin’, if one more person goes outside in this fuckin’ country without giving me fur undershorts, my source of income is gonna shrivel up and fuckin’ die!”
Dex sank down on the bed, sniffly but seemingly okay. He wrapped his arms around Kane’s waist and buried his face in his shoulder. “That would be a real shame,” he said against Kane’s shoulder. “I’m sort of attached to the big guys. They’re awesome at motivation.”
Kane laughed. “Well, maybe you eat some food—”
“Oh hell no!” Dex looked at the aging Chinese food, offended. “There has got to be an omelet place somewhere nearby.”
Kane nodded. “That’s a deal, Dexter.”
“Yeah, well, we’ll look for tickets outta this dump while we’re at it. We need to charge my cell phone, though, because tomorrow’s Christmas Eve, and I need to make sure your present’s on schedule.”
Dex had sort of tipped his head back, so even though he was usually a few inches taller than Kane, Kane got to look at him protectively. His hair was still damp, so Kane amused himself, running his fingers through the part that hung over his forehead, waiting for it to dry. “I thought my present was in that envelope your mom brought.”
Dex shook his head and smiled a little, looking so content there on his shoulder that Kane eased them back so it was like they were in bed again.
“No,” Dex said, curling up on his side. For the first time since they’d gone to bed in the deep a.m., Kane looked at the clock and realized it was only four hours since they’d closed their eyes.
“If that’s not my present, what is it?”
“It’s just an explanation of why your present is your present,” Dex said sleepily. “It’s why I didn’t freak out when we left it at my folks’.”
Kane grunted. “Well, I shoulda freaked out—your present was your present, and I just left it there.”
“Yeah, well, you were looking after me. I forgive you.”
His voice was getting muffled with sleep, and Kane rolled over quickly and gave him a quick kiss on the forehead before sitting up. “And I forgive you for dragging me out to this icehole and exposing me to family drama. How ’bout you take a nap and I’ll take a shower.”
Dex chuckled sleepily. “You smell like lots and lots of sex, Carlos. You can wash it off, but it can’t change the fact we had it.”
Kane pulled him close and spoke softly to the whorls of Dex’s ear. “Yeah, well, who wants to change that?” he whispered and then slid out from under Dex’s body, which was already soggy with sleep. He dragged the comforter over Dex as he lay there, because it was fucking Montana and he could have set the temperature at ninety, the hotel room would still be chilly, and then went to take his shower.
The Wars at Home
Dex
IN THE end it took them two days, four planes, a bus ride from Reno, and everything but a canoe to get the hell home. They walked into their own house on Christmas Eve, dropped their luggage, kicked a groggy (and naked) Ethan to the couch, hit the shower, and passed out for the next twelve hours.
They were surprisingly happy.
Of course they were happy to be sleeping in their own bed—that was a given. And they were happy to wake up together on Christmas Day—that was actually the best part. But the best part before that had been that the nightmare of a trip, the multiple layovers, the time off the ground and in the plane, and even in that lonely, miserable, cold bus from Reno to Sacramento and the shuttle ride home, was accomplished together.
They said very little, played a lot of games on their phones, and spent a lot of time sleeping with their heads on each other’s shoulders or, at least until security in Dallas made them stop, working out with their luggage. (Admittedly they’d been a little punch-drunk then—throwing the big suitcase back and forth at each other at the luggage check had probably not been the wisest choice in the world.)
Waking
up on Christmas morning in their own house was the best gift ever. Judging from Kane’s erection prodding Dex in the back, Kane thought so too.
“Merry Christmas,” Dex said softly, and Kane nuzzled his ear.
“You gonna tell me?” Kane said wickedly, and Dex laughed to himself. It had been a tough secret to keep, it really had, especially when they’d been bored shitless in the middle of the Helena airport and both their cell phones had been charging. But the next five minutes were going to make it all worth it.
“Go check on the scaly things. I’ll make coffee,” he said and snickered to himself as Kane muttered “Killjoy!” and slid out of bed and into his moccasins. He wasn’t too upset, though, Dex could tell. He wanted to see the scaly guys too.
“Oh my God! Dex, get in here, somebody fucked up your guest room!”
Dex was already halfway out of bed, which was good, because he was crippled with giggles as he put on his moccasins and padded in his boxers and a T-shirt to watch Kane unwrap his present.
“Ohmigod, David!” Kane was bouncing from enclosure to enclosure, checking on the newly rebuilt floor-to-ceiling heated iguana and snake cages that Dex had installed on the brand-new porch attached to the guest room. “Ohmigod. You can get to them from the outside too!” he said, getting between the two cages and seeing the door. “You built a porch! In six days!”
“I didn’t build shit!” Dex laughed.
Ethan came wandering in (thank God wearing sweats), and he laughed at that too. “You can say that again. No, Dex hired the whole frickin’ world to come in as soon as you left. Me, Tommy, Chase, Donnie, Kevin—we had to move all the guys into the house proper and keep ’em warm, and then move them back when we were sure it was all set. We were real fuckin’ lucky, Dex. We got rain comin’ in tomorrow, and they finished up yesterday morning!”
Dex shuddered. God, he’d been worried about that. He even had a contingency plan with Tommy that involved moving everybody to Tommy’s place for a month while they finished, but he was so glad they hadn’t had to use it.
“Yeah, well, I owe you,” he said softly, and Ethan rolled his eyes.
“Bullshit. We found the presents in the garage, you know, when Chase came and got the stuff he bought for Tommy? There they were, everybody’s name on them, like you were fuckin’ Santa and we were the elves.”
Dex grinned. “You guys like your shit?” Yeah, he’d bought presents for everybody—something small for the guys he didn’t know really well, a couple of good things for the guys he loved like brothers. He sent everybody else their stuff in the mail, but Ethan, Tommy, Chase, Donnie, Kevin, and Kelsey all had presents waiting in the garage this year. Usually when he went to his parents’, he left gifts under the tree in his house and left someone (usually John) his key, but since there was going to be all the construction, he’d thought the tree would get in the way.
The night before, as he and Kane had dragged themselves in like zombies, he’d noticed that Ethan, faced with the prospect of having Christmas alone this year, had set up a small tree on his coffee table.
“Don’t know,” Ethan said guilelessly. “Haven’t opened my shit yet.” He smiled, and it was a little self-conscious. “I figured I needed something to do on Christmas Day since dinner at Tommy’s isn’t until later.”
Dex was going to say something, try to make that aching hole less big and painful, but at that moment, Kane turned around from the newly remodeled porch with eyes so big and bright that they really were like a little kid’s.
“For me? Dex, you did this for me? This is… this is permanent. You did this thing to your house—”
“Our house,” Dex said, swallowing. “See, this way it’s our house. ’Cause I don’t want to live here if you’re not here. I mean, I know it hasn’t been that long, but, see, that’s what it says in the card. That maybe when Lola moves out, you could maybe sell your place and—”
Kane’s hurtling body pinned him to the wall, and he was lost in a hug so vast and powerful it stopped his breath. “Our house. It is our house!”
Dex nodded and palmed the back of Kane’s head, losing himself in that clean, curly black hair. “And in the summer we can dig a turtle pond and put a brick wall around it, and they can live out there,” he said softly, wanting Kane to approve—to love this plan. They were Kane’s guys, so now they were Dex’s. It was good, right?
“Our house,” Kane said, his voice wobbly. “David Dexter Calvin… this is like… like the best thing. Best Christmas present ever. Best.” He smiled, and it was the watery kind. “Please tell me this isn’t just because I almost froze my balls off in Montana.”
Dex shook his head. “It’s because you got on the plane.”
Kane nodded. “This makes it worth it. I’ll even go visit your big bossy-assed brother for this. I can’t even believe you did this for me.”
Honesty. Complete honesty. “If you think it was for you, you’re mental.” Dex lowered his head then and kissed him, wondering how this had happened, that he’d remade his home just to make this man a part of it. He didn’t know—hadn’t known when he’d made the plan and gotten Tommy and Chase and Ethan to be a part of it—and he still didn’t know, but Kane tasted wonderful, and his happiness fed Dex in ways Dex had forgotten he could be filled.
There was a sound next to them, and Dex looked up at his audience and saw Ethan trying to edge his way out of the room. Dex bumped noses with Kane, and they both looked up at Ethan, who was getting all shy, and that wasn’t a good look for him. They made eye contact and both of them reached out and grabbed his shirt and dragged him into the hug.
He snuggled like a kitten. Just snuggled, his head on Kane’s shoulder, his arm around Dex’s waist, and they stayed there and petted him for a while. They had pets to spare—why the hell not? When the group hug was over, Kane said, “Oh, God! Dex! Lemme get your present, ’kay?”
Kane went running off, and Dex and Ethan went into the kitchen for coffee. Dex pulled out the pancake mix and fixings and was pleased to see there was milk and juice and some fruit in the fridge—Ethan had shopped, which was nice.
“Hey, Ethan?” he said as he cracked an egg into a bowl.
“Yeah?” Ethan was cradling a cup of coffee while leaning up against the island where Dex and Kane usually ate.
“You still living in that crappy apartment?” Dex had found it for him after he’d been kicked out of the house for the porn thing. He’d been living there for around six weeks, and Dex couldn’t help thinking about that little Christmas tree.
“Yeah.” The syllable was flat and almost unfriendly.
“If we move the turtles into our room, the lizards and baby frogs and shit into the living room, all that would be left for that room is the crickets and mice. That porch is heated, so the room might get a little warm, but it’s winter. You… you wouldn’t want to sleep in our spare room instead of the crappy apartment, would you?”
Ethan’s hug over his back was completely platonic and full of so much gratitude that Dex felt bad for not asking him sooner. Well, the room had been full, after all.
“You wouldn’t mind?” Ethan said wistfully, his head resting between Dex’s shoulder blades, and Dex shrugged. Very carefully he set down the egg he’d been about to crack before Ethan had assaulted him with sheer stinking joy.
“We’ll have to ask Kane. Maybe when Lola moves, you can move into Kane’s house for cheap. It’s something to think about.”
“Oh God. That would rock.” Ethan wiped his face against the back of Dex’s T-shirt. It was wet. “I’m telling ya, Dex, I’m just not made to be alone. I feel bad, ’cause you and Kane have this thing going…. I mean… it’s special, and it’s you two, but… God. I just miss my family so bad.”
Dex turned around and wrapped arms around Ethan’s shoulders. He never would have been able to put that into words, he thought. Tommy? Maybe. Chase? He literally would have died before saying something like that. Kane? Yes. Kane wouldn’t know how to hide that.
&nb
sp; But Ethan? “You’re going to be fine,” Dex said softly.
Kane came into the room, the little present box in his hand, and he walked up and started rubbing Ethan’s back while Ethan stopped trembling.
“You’re going to be just fine. We can be your family ’til you find your own, ’kay?”
“Yeah,” Kane said, “but only if you let him go. Dammit, Ethan—he’s fixing the chow!”
“Evan,” Ethan said, backing up and standing shoulder to shoulder with Kane. “Just, you know, so someone knows.”
Kane rested his head on Ethan’s shoulder. “I’m Carlos, Evan. This here’s David. Dexter, why in the fuck aren’t you making my pancakes?”
Dex stuck his tongue out. “Fine.” He turned around and started working. “Ethan’s moving into our spare bedroom. You need to go get the bed out and set it up with him, okay?”
“What happened to our house?” Kane asked, but he didn’t sound mad.
“Kane, can Ethan move into our house?”
“Yeah, Dex, I got no problem with that. As long as he doesn’t mind us having sex in the next room.”
Dex had not been sure he could still blush. Now he knew he could. “Oh God. Thanks a lot, you psycho. Now go move the bed so I can finish breakfast.”
They got the terrariums shifted before the pancakes were done, and after breakfast (and before the rest of the work) they opened presents.
Ethan got clothes and a gold chain (because he wore that sort of thing) and tickets to a play in San Francisco, which made his eyes widen. “How’d you know?” he asked, breathless, looking inside the little box.
“That you like musicals?” Kane asked, disgusted. “You’re the only guy I know who sings Stop the World—I Want to Get Off under his breath.”
“Yeah,” Dex said, smirking, “but with him we could have taken that as a come-on!” Ethan’s on-camera orgasms were legendary—he was the Energizer Bunny of come.
“The world does stop when I come!” Ethan said with a wink, but he was looking pretty damned pleased.