by Anna Martin
He didn’t bother arguing.
“Sorry, the cake isn’t ready yet, or I’d cut you a slice.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Leo went to the cupboard where he knew his dad hid the good kind of chocolate chip cookies, and took them back to the kitchen table. He took a seat while his mom made two mugs of coffee and brought them over.
“But it looks like you’ve found the cookies. So how’s Jackson?”
He contemplated evading the question. Leo really wasn’t sure how he was feeling about the whole situation. Before Leo had left to visit his parents, Jackson had said he wanted to go out to Nine Mile Falls and shift and run. Leo was worried Jackson wasn’t shifting as much as he wanted since he’d moved to the city, especially when Leo was at the condo. But he didn’t really know how to approach the topic with Jackson.
His mom had more patience than anyone else Leo knew and simply sat and sipped while she waited him out.
“Jackson bought a new home. In the city. Riverside.”
“Oh.”
“He’s bought the unit on the first floor of the building too. He’s going to rebuild the brewery there rather than out at the old house.”
“Why has he done that?”
“Because of me, I think,” Leo admitted. He split open the packet of cookies and took two. “Or at least partially because of me. We’re trying to work things out.”
“And how’s that going?”
“Okay, actually. It feels like we’re on a more even keel. I think he wants to have a real relationship.”
Leo’s mom nodded and set her mug on the table. She remained expressionless as she reached up and tugged her hair out of the tie that had been holding it in a ponytail. Her soft brown hair, a few shades lighter than Leo’s, fell just to her shoulders. When she was baking she usually tied it back.
“He didn’t say the house was for me, but he did mention that he wants me to stay over sometimes.”
That felt like a big admission.
“And what do you think about that?”
He ate another damned cookie. “Jackson is never going to be someone who’s open with his emotions; it takes a while to dig into what he’s feeling. You have to interpret stuff. But I’ve never doubted that he cares about me.”
“He might never be that, Leo.”
“I know.”
“So, what if that’s the case? What if Jackson continues to struggle with his sexuality over the next few years? Is that going to affect any possible relationship you have?”
“He told people about me, so it’s not such a secret.” Leo scrunched up his nose and studied his coffee carefully. “I asked him to be more open about our relationship, and he has been, even though it’s still hard for him, adjusting to the idea of having a soul mate who’s a guy.”
“Oh, Leo.”
“I want him to be happy with me. I want to be the person who makes him happy.”
His mom gave him a fond look. “If he knows what’s good for him, he’ll recognize that. Sometimes you need to let someone come to that conclusion on their own, though. There’s a trick many a woman has learned: how to make a man think that her idea is his own.”
Leo laughed. “I’m familiar with the concept.”
“For what it’s worth, I think Jackson is making progress under his own steam. The more you can be a constant, positive influence in his life, the better.” She reached over and squeezed Leo’s hand. “You’ll get there, sweetheart.”
Leo smiled. “Thanks, Mom.”
The alarm in the kitchen started to beep, letting them know the dough was done proving and was ready for the oven.
“Come on,” his mom said, patting Leo on the arm as she pushed to her feet. “We have cakes to make.”
BY EARLY afternoon there was a steady rain falling over Spokane, Leo’s mom was satisfied with his version of events, and the trunk of the Prius was full of enough groceries to last them a week. Leo wanted to make up some meals for Jackson that he just had to microwave when Leo wasn’t around. Otherwise he was definitely going to live on takeout until the bar opened. And maybe even after.
He managed to juggle the bags into the elevator—because he was not taking the stairs when he was so close to dropping something—and into the condo. To his surprise, the door was open. Apparently Jackson was back from his run already.
“Honey, I’m home,” he called, just for fun.
“In here.”
Jackson had moved his laptop from the office to the breakfast bar. He was still hunched over spreadsheets, but now there was a bottle of beer at his elbow and an empty packet of Doritos pushed out of the way. And a huge vase of yellow roses in the middle of the coffee table.
Leo dumped the bags on the counter and went to give Jackson a smacking kiss on the cheek.
Jackson snorted with laughter. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome. How was your run?”
“Good.”
That was probably all Leo was going to get out of him, and he decided not to push.
“Who are the flowers from?”
“Me,” Jackson said. He still didn’t meet Leo’s eyes. “For you.”
“You are too adorable.”
There was one bottle of the beer Leo preferred in the fridge, so he helped himself and went to sit at the table. Jackson would always make him some more when they ran out.
“Are you nearly done?”
“Almost,” Jackson said. “For tonight.”
“Okay. Because I stopped by the apartment to talk to Mitch.”
“About anything in particular?”
“Living arrangements,” Leo admitted, playing with the label on his bottle. “He’s always asked me to be honest about my plans, so I thought he should know what I’m thinking.”
“You know you’re welcome to bring your stuff over whenever you’re ready,” Jackson said. He took a swig of his beer and didn’t look over at Leo, not properly. Leo knew now that he did this when he was feeling shy or overwhelmed. “I have a room put aside for you, so you’ll have your own space if you want it.”
“The spare room?”
“It’s not really a spare room, it’s your office. Or whatever you want to do with it.” He muttered the last few words as he hunched over the laptop again.
Leo butt-shuffled over on his chair to kiss Jackson on the cheek again. “I like being here.”
“Good.”
“I want to be your soul mate.”
“Double good.”
“I’m going to keep some of my stuff at Mitch’s apartment until he’s got someone else ready to move in,” Leo said. “I’ll keep paying him rent too.”
“You don’t need to pay me rent here, Leo.” Jackson looked annoyed.
“No, but I want to contribute.”
“Okay. We’ll work something out.”
Leo couldn’t help but be quietly amused. Jackson definitely had a thing for “providing” for his soul mate. Leo wasn’t sure if this was some kind of instinct, or whether it was something cultural that had been drummed into him.
Leo kissed him again and went to put the groceries away.
Chapter Twenty-Five
THE WORST part wasn’t the prospect of rebuilding the business in a new location, with a new business model. Jackson was actually pretty stoked at the opportunity to do that. The worst part was the waiting, and knowing he wouldn’t be able to even start brewing for weeks and weeks.
While the insurance company dragged their heels and resolutely did not want to come to a decision on the old brewery, Jackson raided his savings and the company profits to start building the new bar. He hired an architect—the friend of his dad’s—and slowly started putting the condo interior together the way he wanted it.
“I want you to be involved.” Jackson shifted on the bed to a better position. He was getting a crick in his neck from holding the phone between his ear and shoulder.
“I know nothing about beer, Jackson. Or bars. Or creating either of those things.”
/> It was late, past midnight, and Leo should have been asleep ages ago. Jackson had told him so himself. He was feeling like a teenage schoolgirl, though, and was reluctant to end the conversation.
“I know. I still want you involved, though.”
“When’s the meeting with the architect?”
“Thursday.”
“Okay. If I can make it, I’ll be there.”
“Okay. Thanks.”
Leo fell quiet then, and the soft sound of his yawn came through the phone.
“Go to bed,” Jackson said.
“I’m already in bed.”
“Go to sleep, then.”
“Not….” He yawned again. “Not tired.”
“I don’t believe you. Go to sleep.”
“Okay. I’ll see you on Thursday.”
“Good night.”
Leo said good night and rang off. Jackson closed his phone case and scrubbed his hands over his face. He wasn’t particularly tired; his day ran later than Leo’s. For the past week, Leo had been starting work at 7:30 a.m. and often didn’t get home until after 6:00 p.m. It had meant they had less time to spend together than usual, but that was okay. Jackson was busy too.
He sat up properly, propping a pillow behind his back, and opened his laptop to go over the specs Linh, the architect, had sent. She had managed to capture the essence of what Jackson wanted, the feel of the place, but he was a little concerned about the amount of space dedicated to the brewery. It was going to be a lot less than he was used to, and he wasn’t yet convinced she’d come up with the best way to organize the space. Leo hadn’t been over yet to see what work was being done in the brewery, but Jackson sent him pictures and plans from time to time.
He fell asleep with the laptop still in the bed with him, and woke with his face pressed to its cool surface.
While plans for downstairs continued to grow, Jackson was happy with how the condo was progressing.
He’d hired a moving truck and spent a day loading it up with most of his stuff from the old house and moving it up to the condo. It had been surprisingly unemotional. Jackson had expected to feel at least slightly sad about moving, but the promise of building a new life much closer to Leo was overpowering the sadness.
The house felt weird now too. Tainted.
Jackson hadn’t decided yet what he was going to do with the house, if he wanted to sell it or develop the land or just leave it for a few years. Even if he did sell, he’d still be able to keep using the land that no one owned if he wanted to shift and run, so it was a possibility to consider.
When he was done moving his stuff, he called the cleaning company to go through the place again, then locked the doors behind himself and put the house and the barn and the fire and everything out of his mind.
By Thursday, Jackson had picked a new desk for his office in the brewery and an awesome leather desk chair, with the promise that it would be delivered the following week, meaning he could finally set up his office space how he liked it.
He was walking through the industrial unit with Linh when he heard the door push open.
“Hello?”
“We’re back here,” Jackson called.
Leo walked cautiously over the uneven floor, following the light from the flashlights Jackson and Linh were holding. With the new industrial lights still not fitted, it was pretty dim on-site in the early evenings.
“Hi,” Jackson said, pulling Leo in close so he could kiss his hairline.
“Hi.”
“Linh, this is Leo, my mate.”
“Nice to meet you,” Leo said, offering his hand for her to shake.
“Same. We were just talking about the dimensions of Jackson’s new brewery.”
“How soon will he be able to get back to work?” Leo asked.
Linh smiled. “I know Jackson is desperate to be brewing again. Is he driving you crazy?”
“Of course not, dear.” Leo tilted his head and offered Jackson a winning smile.
“Hey,” Jackson said, mock-offended.
“We’re going to do the construction in phases,” Linh said. “Starting at the back and working our way forward. That means the brewery should be finished in about five weeks, ready for Jackson to start work again. It might not be pretty, but it’ll be done.”
“We can work on pretty later,” Jackson said.
“Exactly. We’ll get specialists in to install all of Jackson’s equipment. The bar will take longer anyway, because we’ll be decorating and bringing it all up to a higher standard than backstage. Then, once Jackson lets us back in, we’ll fix up the brewery area so he can offer tours and such.”
“Sounds good,” Leo said.
“I’ve got all the drawings upstairs,” Jackson told him. “We can look at them after dinner if you like.”
“You made dinner?” Leo looked hopeful.
“There’s a pot of chili on the stove and cornbread in the oven. You just need to warm the cornbread.”
“You’re amazing.”
“You can go on up if you like. We’re almost done here.”
Leo nodded, said goodbye to Linh, and headed out.
“You seem to have a very wonderful mate,” Linh said.
Jackson grinned. “Believe me, I know.”
They quickly went through the final specs for the bar so Jackson could decide what work he wanted to put with his dad and what would be bought from a commercial supplier. Linh had a good grasp on the overall feel that Jackson was going for, so he trusted her to relay that to the project manager who would oversee the decorating once Linh was done.
Jackson had already booked in with Linh for the builders to start work before the end of February, which was a time frame that suited him just fine. They confirmed a few more details, and then Jackson walked her out, bristling at the cold as he rushed back up to the condo.
Leo was sitting on the couch wearing a pair of Jackson’s sweatpants and a T-shirt.
“Comfy?” Jackson asked with a laugh.
“Very. Sorry. I was cold, and jeans aren’t the best for lazing around in.”
Jackson leaned against the doorframe and crossed his arms over his chest, looking at Leo. “You were going to start bringing your stuff over,” he said cautiously.
“I know,” Leo said. “I’m sorry. I haven’t been putting it off on purpose. I just haven’t got round to packing yet.”
Jackson shrugged, affecting nonchalance he didn’t really feel. “There’s not a rush,” he said. “If you need help just let me know.”
“Do you want to come over and help lift heavy stuff?” Leo teased.
Jackson huffed. “I can do that,” he said, smiling.
Leo smiled back. “Okay.”
He only nodded in response, not wanting to make a big deal about it, and went through to the kitchen to start serving up the chili. He jumped when, a moment later, Leo wrapped his arms around Jackson’s waist as he was stirring the pot.
“You all right?”
Leo rubbed his nose against Jackson’s back. “Cold.”
“Turn the thermostat up, if you like.”
“This is better.”
“I agree, but I kind of want to eat.”
“Mm. Me too.”
Leo stepped away and went to the fridge. “What are we drinking?”
“Whatever you can find,” Jackson said. He carefully served two huge bowls of chili. He loved making it like this, simmering the dish for hours to let the flavors blend together. “I think there’s Sprite in there somewhere.”
“That works.”
Leo emerged with two cans, and grabbed silverware from the drawer before taking it all through to the family room and turning on the TV.
As Jackson followed him, he tried not to think too much about how quickly this had become familiar routine.
“Here.” He passed one of the bowls to Leo, who gaped at it.
“Am I expected to eat all this?”
“Not if you don’t want to. It can go back in the pot for lef
tovers.”
“You made it?”
“Yeah,” Jackson said, stirring the chili with his spoon. “I learned from one of my frat brothers when I was at college. He was from Texas, though his family are from Louisiana, and had the best chili recipe of anyone I’ve ever met. Don’t tell my mom I said that.”
He took a big bite, pleased with Leo’s reaction after he did the same.
“It is good.”
They ate in silence for a while, Leo giving Jackson’s cornbread similar praise, though that came from a box rather than a secret family recipe. Jackson could cook just fine, but he’d been a single man living on his own for far too long. He was all about the shortcuts.
When Leo was done, he stretched out on the couch.
“Look at my belly,” he said, poking it. “You can see how much I just ate. That was amazing.”
“Glad you liked it.”
Jackson picked up Leo’s abandoned bowl and finished what was left. It wasn’t much. Leo had made an impressive effort to clear it.
When he was done, Leo snuggled into his side and Jackson wrapped an arm around his shoulders obligingly. “Do you want to stay tonight?”
Leo stilled his gentle stroking of Jackson’s knee. “I don’t have anything with me. For tonight or work tomorrow.”
Jackson shrugged. “What time do you need to start in the morning? Could you stop by your apartment on your way in?”
“I could… but I’d have to be awake early. Probably ungodly early for you.”
“I don’t mind.”
After a moment, Leo nodded. “Okay. Let’s see if it works.”
“Thank you,” Jackson murmured against his head, then kissed him quickly.
The rest of the evening was comfortingly domestic. They watched TV, washed dishes, and Jackson packed up leftovers so he didn’t need to worry about cooking for a few nights. Leo wore Jackson’s clothes, and Jackson tried not to feel all alpha-male about it.
They made out in the kitchen for a while when Leo was done washing dishes, and Jackson let himself get lost in soft skin and warm lips.
“Do you wanna…?” Jackson asked, mouthing at Leo’s neck.
“Jackson.” Leo chuckled and gently pushed him away. “It’s almost eleven at night, and I ate chili for dinner.”