by Cate Ashwood
“We weren’t sure you were real,” Graham teased.
Elle elbowed him hard enough that he winced. “Don’t mind my asshole husband. Come on up.”
Graham stood, making space for Asher and me to board the boat.
I stepped on, careful not to slip as I climbed up. The boat rocked a little when Asher followed, the heft of him moving us in the water. Graham patted Asher’s perfectly sculpted stomach. “Time to lay off the Cheetos, bud.”
Elle introduced us to two other couples before Graham hopped off, loaded up the coolers, untied the ropes from the T-shaped hardware bolted to the dock, and climbed back on. There were benches with thick foam cushions build into the sides of the boat, and I took a seat next to Asher near the back.
“Everyone ready?” Graham asked as he stepped up to the wheel.
I leaned in to Asher and lowered my voice. “Should we be wearing life jackets?”
“You’re fine for now,” Graham answered, though I hadn’t meant for him to hear. “You might want to call dibs on one now for after I get into the sangria, though.”
I shot a look to Asher, who just laughed.
“Graham doesn’t drink,” Elle explained. “Which means there’s more for us!” She held up the pitcher in one hand and a glass in the other. “Would you like some?”
“It’s mostly fruit, right? One couldn’t hurt,” I said.
“Atta boy.” She poured the drink to almost the rim before handing it to me, then another for Asher.
I almost spilled as the boat took off across the water. Wind whipped past my face, and the scent of the sea surrounded me. It was a gorgeous day, the heat starting in early enough that I was glad there was some shade under the awning.
“So, Henry, Ash tells us you’re a psychologist.” Elle’s eyes were trained on me, and I got the uneasy sense this was where the interrogation was going to start. Ash had warned me Graham and Elle were protective of him, but I hadn’t anticipated the question-and-answer portion of the day to begin so early.
I nodded as I swallowed my drink. “I teach at the university.”
“So, if I can get you a few minutes with Graham, you can tell me what’s wrong with him?”
“He’s a shitty driver, for one,” Asher pointed out as the boat swerved, and he knocked into me, almost spilling his drink.
“Don’t need a psychology degree to figure that one out,” Elle countered.
Graham didn’t look amused. “Either of you want to take over? You’ll have to put down your drinks now.”
“We’re good!” Elle waved him off. She continued to question me about my education, my family, and my hobbies, while everyone else set out the food. I did my best to answer everything, knowing this was an important test to pass. When she looked over at Graham and winked, I hoped that meant I’d aced it.
Graham stopped the boat a ways from shore and cut the engine.
“Good thing you cook better than you drive,” Elle said, popping a piece of potato into her mouth.
Before I knew what was happening, Graham had scooped Elle up and climbed onto the bench, holding her over the edge of the boat. She laughed and clung to him. “Put me down! I hate you, Graham Stiltner!”
The expression on her face told a very different story, and I couldn’t help but laugh along with her. I wasn’t the only one, either. Asher chuckled loudly as he climbed up on the bench next to Graham and took Elle from him, setting her gently back down on the boat deck.
“At least someone is a gentleman,” she said.
Graham scoffed. “Ash’s the only man on this boat who isn’t a gentleman.” But before he’d gotten to the end of the sentence, Asher had lifted him off the floor and tossed him over his shoulder. “I take it back!” Graham cried, but Asher had already hefted him over the edge.
He collided with the water, a huge splash hitting the side of the boat, and he surfaced a moment later spluttering and wiping the water from his eyes.
“You’re fucked now, Wescott. When I get up there, your ass is getting wet.”
Asher tipped his head back as he laughed and tore his T-shirt up and over his head. Tossing it down on the seat next to me, he turned back to Graham, who had begun to swim toward the back of the boat where the ladder was.
“I’m shaking in my boots, dickwad,” he said before he stepped up on the side and dove off, entering the water with barely a ripple.
“Ash was a diver in high school,” Elle whispered, leaning into me.
“Apparently the skills stuck.” I was in awe, and Elle giggled.
Three of the others joined Asher and Graham in the water, while Tina sunbathed on the front of the boat. Elle and I stuck close to the food, where we had a great view of Asher and his friends swimming. Every so often, one of them would climb out of the water and dive back in, but none of them had the same grace Asher did.
I was wholly impressed and a little turned on.
When I looked back, I found Elle staring at me rather than at her husband, and a moment later when I turned again, she was still looking at me.
“What?” I was incredibly self-conscious. Had I dripped queso on my shirt?
“Nothing,” she replied in a tone that told me it was decidedly not nothing.
I narrowed my eyes and asked again. “No, really. What?”
She gave me a half smile and shuffled closer. “I’m trying to figure you out, that’s all. You’re a bit of a mystery to all of us.”
“How’s that?” I waited for her to continue. Anything she had to tell me about Asher, I definitely wanted to know.
“I don’t know how to say this without painting him in a terrible light,” she admitted.
“How about you tell me and I promise to only take your meaning in the most positive way I can.”
She grinned. “Deal. Asher… he gets around. Not that he’s a slut, or a player… it’s not only men he moves on from quickly.”
I knew Asher had been with other men before me. We hadn’t discussed it, but I couldn’t say I wasn’t curious. I wanted to know everything about him, but I held back from asking him details about his dating past because even thinking about him being with someone else summoned a streak of jealousy I hadn’t known I possessed.
“He’s not callous. I don’t think he even realizes how fast he moves from relationship to relationship, but he loses interest in things faster than most two-year-olds. The new and shiny wears off and he’s on to something new,” Elle explained.
I laughed. “I can see that.”
“Most guys, he’d have long since moved on from by now… but you’re still here. He looks at you like… I don’t know. Like you’re amazing, but until today we had no idea because he won’t tell us a goddamn thing about you beyond the basic. And he tells us—well, Graham, but then Graham tells me—everything. We’ve heard things we don’t want to know.”
Unequivocal happiness swelled in my chest.
“I don’t want you to think he’s some heartless asshole that jumps from bed to bed. He’s not, at least, he doesn’t mean to be like that. I think maybe it’s that he hasn’t found someone worth sticking around for yet. But when it matters, he’s there. His job at the rec center, his friendships—he and Graham have been best friends since the day Asher peed in his kiddie pool—if it’s something he cares about, he is loyal to a fault.”
I nodded, processing exactly what it was she was trying to say to me. I realized there was more subtext there than was immediately obvious.
“That’s why it’s so interesting that you’re still around… He’d kill me if he knew I was telling you all this.”
I nudged her with my shoulder. “I won’t tell him if you won’t. Besides, Asher’s penchant for the new and exciting isn’t exactly news to me. Realizing he was the same way with the guys he dates is a conclusion I easily could have reached myself.”
“I appreciate it.”
“What are you guys getting so cozy over?” Asher asked, walking over with three beer bottles balanced in his han
ds, water dripping off his body.
“Elle was telling me about the time you peed in Graham’s pool,” I teased.
He shot her a dirty look, then grinned at me and shrugged. “I was four. And the bathroom in the house was occupied. Seemed like the ideal solution at the time.”
“An auspicious start to a friendship,” I said.
“A friendship that has lasted three decades,” Elle added.
“A friendship that could very well be over if you insist on divulging all my secrets to my boyfriend.”
Neither one seemed to notice how I froze up at the word “boyfriend.”
It’s not that I didn’t realize that’s where this was heading, but to hear him say it aloud, so nonchalantly, made my breath catch in my throat. I forced air into my lungs, then out again, schooling my expression to one that I hoped mimicked neutrality.
It took a few seconds, but the slight panic I’d felt subsided, and in its place, a warm sort of contentment was left at the thought that Asher wanted me to be known as his boyfriend.
I was starting to suffer the effects of being out on the water for so many hours with the sun beating down on us. By the time we’d docked, a heavy sort of satisfied exhaustion began to set in.
We helped Elle and Graham clean up and tie off the boat before saying goodbye. Elle made me promise to send her my potato salad recipe and then solicited another promise of dinner, just the four of us, sometime in the coming weeks.
I could see why Asher was so close with them. They were good people, and they genuinely cared about him.
“Will you stay?” I asked when Asher pulled up in front of my house. It had been a long day and we were both tired, but I didn’t want him to leave.
“If you want me to.”
“I want you to,” I echoed and was rewarded with a smile.
He parked and we went inside, closing and locking the door behind us, then migrated to the kitchen. I poured us each a glass of wine, and we settled in for the evening on the couch.
I flicked on the TV, but neither of us were really watching. After an hour or so, I was beginning to doze against Asher, his chest the best pillow I’d ever had.
“Henry,” he whispered, startling me awake. “Time for bed, I think.”
I nodded and he stood before helping me to my feet. My body weighed a thousand pounds, and I almost asked if he could carry me to the bedroom.
We brushed our teeth and got undressed, then climbed into bed and dragged the covers up. Asher reached for me, pulling me against his body, his skin warm and smooth against my back. I loved the way his hand splayed across my stomach and the way he kissed the back of my neck.
I wiggled closer and his kisses continued from the back to the side. As his mouth moved across my skin, my body responded, and my sleepiness from minutes before had faded away. This was familiar now, this heavy arousal that surged through me at Asher’s touch. I arched back against him, against the hard ridge of him angled against my ass.
“Henry.” It came out as more of a growl than anything, and the sound traveled straight through me, anchoring itself in my chest. I flipped over to see him. His eyes were dark with arousal, and the way he looked at me, hungry and wanting, kicked my heart rate up.
I shifted closer, my hand going to the side of his neck as I leaned in to kiss him. He tasted minty from my toothpaste. I slid my tongue against his, licking into his mouth, his lips, conveying what I needed through action rather than words.
He moved, rolling to pin me beneath him, pressing me into the mattress with the solidness of his body. I loved that feeling, the sensation of being held down by him, the sensation of being surrounded.
Asher kissed me again and we settled into an easy rhythm, our bodies moving languidly together. He reached down and pulled my knees up higher on either side of his hips, one hand gripping my ass. He rocked against me, and I moaned.
“Ash,” I gasped, his cock sliding along mine and sending shivers through me.
He hummed against my shoulder.
“Will you fuck me?” I was breathless just asking.
The way he popped up to look at me would have been comical if it weren’t for the serious expression on his face. His eyes locked with mine.
“Are you sure?”
I nodded. “I’ve been thinking about it, ever since the first time… I want to know what it’s like to have you inside me, to feel what you feel.”
He looked back at me, nothing but raw desire in his eyes. I pulled him down to kiss me, to reassure me. I wanted this—had wanted it for a long time—but I was nervous. I didn’t know what to expect.
“We’ll go slow,” he promised while he grabbed the condoms and lube.
I nodded, trusting him completely, and waited as he uncapped the bottle and poured a little over his fingers. I closed my eyes and waited. The cool air in the room skated across my body, and my skin prickled with anticipation. When he finally touched me, I jumped.
“You okay?”
I nodded again. I knew if I spoke, my voice would shake.
He pressed his mouth to mine, distracting me. He kissed me for an eternity until I was relaxed and pliant, and then I felt his fingers against my entrance. I tensed again, but he moved in gentle circles around the muscle, adding pressure little by little.
He pressed inside me, and my body froze. It stung, and for a moment, panic gripped me. Asher stilled, and as the seconds passed, the stinging faded into something more pleasant. After a few moments, he pushed farther in, the pleasantness became desire. I angled back against him and kissed him harder, needing something, needing more.
One finger became two and I was shocked with how good it felt. He bent his fingers deep inside, rubbing against my prostate, and I nearly flew off the mattress. I gasped his name and gripped him hard. The pleasure was intense, almost too much, but it wasn’t what I needed.
Asher withdrew his hands and rolled on a condom before he settled himself between my thighs. The gravity of what we were doing slammed into me as he stared down at me, but I trusted Asher with everything I had. I knew he wouldn’t hurt me. I wanted this.
So when he positioned the head of his cock against my entrance, I let my eyes fall closed and waited for him to push inside.
I didn’t have to wait long. I gasped as he slid inside, so incredibly slowly. As before, the burning sensation consumed me and I whimpered, but Asher soothed away the pain with kisses and patience until all that was left was an aching feeling of pleasure. I didn’t know if I hated it or loved it, but I was so full and it was Asher and I needed him to move.
I rocked against him, wanting the friction. He groaned into my mouth as his kisses lost some of their finesse and he started to thrust. Heat and pleasure burst through me, lighting fireworks in my chest as he fucked me. I’d never experienced anything like this, anything so base, so primal, as my need for him.
I tilted my hips, matching his rhythm and trying to take him deeper. I needed all of him, and when he wrapped his fist around my cock, moving it in time to his thrusts, my brain short-circuited. I didn’t know what to concentrate on, which sensation was better. Pressure built, my orgasm winding tight inside me. The sounds of sex and the scent of Asher surrounded me, and it all became too much.
My orgasm hit me hard and I fell apart, consumed and turned completely inside out. I cried out Asher’s name, come splashing against my belly and his as I rode out wave after wave of pleasure.
His hips snapped forward and he buried himself as far as he could as he came deep inside me.
I gripped his shoulders and kissed the side of his neck, damp with sweat. I couldn’t tell which one of us was shaking. Maybe both of us were. It didn’t matter. Carefully, he pulled out and collapsed beside me, holding me for a few minutes before getting up to toss the condom. When he returned to the bed, he pulled me tight against him.
I closed my eyes and breathed him in, too far gone to speak.
We lay like that for what felt like forever before I drifted off to sle
ep, sated and happy.
The bacon was sizzling in the pan when Asher ducked his head into the kitchen. “Can I borrow this?”
I looked up to see him holding my copy of The View from the Willow Tree. “You want to read it?”
“You said it was your favorite, right?”
“It was when I was twelve. I don’t think I’ve read it since, but I probably read it a hundred times that year. It’s the one book that’s stuck with me.”
“Then yeah, I want to read it.”
I beamed at him. “Then yes, of course you can borrow it.”
There was something about Asher, hair tousled from sleep, naked from the waist up, and holding a book, that made me want to drag him back into bed and never let him leave.
After breakfast, Asher headed home to grab some fresh clothes but promised he’d be back later and we could cook dinner together. I couldn’t remember a time when I’d felt happier than I did that morning.
My body ached, but pleasantly, and it reminded me of what had happened the night before. I’d felt so connected to him. It was almost scary how intense the experience had been, but everything I felt for Asher seemed to be intense.
As I stripped the bed to change the sheets, my phone rang.
“Hey, Calvin,” I said in greeting.
“Where were you yesterday?” he asked. “I called your house and your cell, and you never returned my calls.”
Shit. I’d forgotten he called. When it came to Asher, everything else seemed to fade into the background.
“Sorry, I was out on a boat meeting Ash’s friends.”
“You guys have been spending every waking—and I’m assuming some nonwaking—moment together. Things getting serious?”
“Maybe a bit.”
“So, when do I get to meet this mystery woman? You introduced me to Megan right away, but you’ve been going out with this chick for what now? Months? You afraid she’s going to take one look at me and go for the hotter brother?”
For a moment, I thought about confessing everything to him, but there was a part of me that held back. I would tell him eventually. Things with Asher were becoming more serious, and as close as Calvin and I were, there would come a point when I would need to tell him.